I’m thinking that “30s” is doing some pretty heavy lifting here. Late 30s is still “30s,” but the prospects of an attractive woman who was 29 a week ago and that same woman when she’s a week from being 40 are very different.

My goodness, she never shuts up.

I feel like we don't talk enough about

No, we do, we just don't want to hear you talk about it.

I love the life I've built for myself

Sure you do. I'm not the one making videos ranting about how lonely and jealous I am.

The fact is, when you are with your "friends" who are married, you feel inferior because you are. This makes you feel jealous because you want what they have.

The loneliness is deeper than they admit. This kind of woman cries herself to sleep every night for decades. They missed their calling in life and they know it, deep down. But they can never admit to that without qualifications and cope.

blah blah blah

Ok, so what's the solution here? Maybe just stop hanging out with those married friends of yours who have moved on? Or maybe if we just "talk more" about how lonely you are, that will help?

Oh right, you're after attention and validation for your useless life. You want sympathy for your bad choices and missed opportunities, and praise for "building" your little house of useless cards.

In an apartment complex that I lived in Houston, there was a loose knit collection of about 10-15 singles. We would meet at the pool on the weekends, and have informal parities. If one person knew of a singles event, they would inform the rest, and whoever wanted could attend. I even dated one of the girls in the group for a short time.

In the group, was an attractive girl named Heidi. She was a degreed professional in the oil business. And you couldn’t miss her. She was 5’11”, blonde hair, with blue eyes. Typical for a tall girl, she didn’t have much up top, but she have broad curvy hips and an hour glass waist. She, needless to say, she got the attention of single men.

One Saturday, I was catching rays and drinking beer with some of the other guys at the apartment complex pool, when one man I knew walked up to the group of us. He stated he had proposed to Heidi, and she had turned him down. He approached us in the off chance that someone might know Heidi and put the good word in for him with her. Months later, I was at my section’s pool of the apartment complex. There was a water polo game in progress, one man about 10 feet away me on my left, was playing boom box, and about 10 feet in the other direction were two girls from the group talking about how Heidi had rejected two other men's marriage proposals. I wasn’t getting all the details of the conversation due to noise at the pool and that fact I didn’t really care, so I don’t know if the two girls were jealous of Heidi getting the attention of these two men, or if these women were mocking these men as losers, due to Heidi rejecting them. But the point here is not only was Heidi getting the attention of single men, but marriage proposals.

Fast forward 12 years, one child and one divorce later on my part. A friend wanted me to join a dating agency. He would get a bonus if I joined, and I could join at a discount. I said before I join, I wanted to see what the single girls in the agency look like. I was given a binder of women 30-34 years of age. In the binder were pages of women. At the top of the page, in about 1 inch high letters was the girl's name, then below that a 2"x3" photo of her and below that 3 or 4 paragraphs that she wrote of herself. I started looking, when I got to page 7 or 8, I noticed the name Heidi. I took a good look, and it was her. I quickly scanned her paragraphs. I remembered a phrase of one sentence, it read, “34 years old, never married, no children.” I thought how could this be? I knew of three men who wanted to marry her, and in the 12 years that had passed there must have been more. How was it possible she never married given all the advantages she had? What dating parameters did she employ that failed her so miserably that resulted in her being never married given all the physical advantages she had?

In a social setting, if she were not the most desirable girl, she certainly was one of the more desirable girls. And I am here to tell you Heidi could have had absolutely any man she wanted, and I mean absolutely any man. If a poll had been taken by the single men in the complex of who would be most likely single at the age of 34, I am here to tell you Heidi’s name would not have been at the top of the list. What had she done with her life? How was it possible she never married? Did she think at the age of 34, she would have a bigger and better selection of single males than when she was 24?

I suspect in her 20's, she had a male qualification list as long as her inseam, and if a male were lacking any one of these parameters, he was immediately rejected. She kept saying no to men, until there were no men to say no, to.

I also suspect that all during her early years, she was used to getting plenty of male attention, and assumed her future would be like her past. Why would it change? In her years 17-26, she most likely was the crème de la crème of women. But as she entered her late 20’s, much to her dismay, there were lots of younger girls, many prettier and more approachable, meaning shorter. At 5’11”, she was taller than 99% of the women, 80% of the men and at 28 years of age, older than 90% of both men and women in a single’s bar. She stood out like a sore thumb due to her height and age.

How her story ends? I don’t know. I didn’t join the dating agency. But it was Heidi’s actions and Heidi’s actions alone that made her single. I bet never in her worse nightmare, did she ever think she would be childless and single at the age of 34. She wasted her youth and fertility using extremely flawed dating parameters that she created and imposed on herself and refused to change in spite of years of obvious failure. I can’t say for sure, but I will bet a dollar to a dime, she was a heightist, which made her prospects to find a man even harder.

Updated comments 6/17/2021 from Reddit readers I had a Heidi in my family. One of my aunts while in her 20s and early 30s had plenty of marriage proposals but turned them all down for different reasons. This one was too short, that one was bald, this one didn't make enough money, this one isn't from a connected family, etc, etc. She thought because she was attractive the proposals would never end and "Mr. Perfect" would show up eventually if she held out. Well, as she aged the proposals started coming less and less until her late 30s when they stopped completely. She ended up dying all by herself. No husband, no boyfriend, no kids, nothing. Just her in that house by herself. Today my female cousins use her as an example of what could happen wherever one of their friends is being too picky with men.

At my 20th High School reunion one of my classmates had matured into a complete stunner. She was pretty in high school but at the reunion she was really phenomenal looking. A few weeks later I emailed her to let her know and she wrote back with a response that I've never really wrapped my head around. She thanked me for my "encouragement" which really left me puzzled. In hindsight I think she probably took the Heidi route and found herself pushing 40 with no husband, no kids and a damaged ego.

I don't see why any of what she mentions should come as a surprise. The freedom of not having to answer to anybody is what women wanted. The fact that she can be a single woman in her thirties, afford to live on her own and not need to answer to any man other than her boss (who may be a woman) is the entire point of feminism.

The expectation to not need other people is clearly a harmful delusion. We know that, at least on some level. We see it even in children's TV-shows were the power of friendship always triumphs over the antisocial villain who only cares about herself.

And yet young women are taught to act like they are beyond this basic human need for companionship. I feel equal part pity for them that they fell for this, and a desire to gloat over them receiving karmic justice.

Public service message: If you enjoy the content, please consider posting this link to the Reddit version of WAATGM since I cannot. It drives more traffic to this site, such as myself, and that's how the content creation happens. Please do your part: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_7FaWnlhS4&t=10s

@Typo-MAGAshiv please help with flair if appropriate: Inspin or Single Woman tears?

I got precisely 6 seconds in before having a "Holy shit this woman has a face and voice that NEEDED to settle early and did not." reaction. Fukkin AI filter was probably making the phone melt it was working so hard, and the best it could do with what was on offer was making her resemble some sort of "Grey" alien with slathered on foundation and a wig.

I wonder if she thought "doing Coke" was supposed to be attractive? All that phenylalanine and aspartame isn't going to help her age further nicely.

What a well-crafted cocktail of Diet Coke poured over ice, “perfection” indeed. Nothing wrong with a simple drink, but don’t brag about it at first sip.

in your thirties

I'd have guessed late forties! This woman may have remained thin, and kudos for that, but her face did not age well at all! I'm 46 and look younger than her.

"Being the single friend in your 30s when all of your friends are married.

She left out "late 30s." The length of the video is, coincidentally, exactly the amount of time I'd be able to tolerate her voice and cadence in meat world. Completely annoying.

Judging by the depth of that turkey neck, she must be 39.999 years old, technically still in her 30's. She just had to get that out there before the big 4-0 and a group of cats shows up on her doorstep.