Dedicated to exposing all the women who complain about wanting a "good man", to show women's poor dating behavior and unreasonable standards while offering little to no value themselves.
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TJMS 1mo ago
Love how she scribbles the "?" marks all over the place in those dating profiles, like she literally can't understand why I man would say those things.
It's called having options and preferences, sweaty, men are allowed to have them.
Typo-MAGAshiv asshole. giga-shitlord. worst mod EVAR. 1mo ago
Nuh-uh! We only exist to provide resources and services for m'lady!
SO GET TO WORK!
Bozza 1mo ago
They have no concept that men really dgaf about relationships or marriage.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1mo ago
Minor quibble: Not all men, just the handsome men that she finds worthy to wife her up and pay the bills.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1mo ago
Someone kindly please post to the Reddit site. Suggest watching in order for context.
SwarmShawarma 1mo ago
I got to be slow today, I dont get the dating app summaries.
No-Stress-Cat Jr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
When they're 30 and still trying to find themselves it's empowerment, but when men are in their 30's and still trying to find themselves, it's like WTF?
MentORPHEUS TRP Endorsed 1mo ago
I was sick of her in less than 5 minutes of her face scrunched gesticulations. Social media seems to amplify and propagate this behavior pattern. In person, it's nowhere near as clever, cute, edgy, or whatever they think of it.
First-light Jr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
A great critic but a poor artist.
She knows all the answers but she still can't get taken off the market.
The only answer she needed was yes.
She needed it 10 years ago when she was getting all her itches out of the way.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1mo ago
The individual videos wouldn’t be compelling on their own, but together they are the quintessential story of many inspins: 1) She's otherwise quite physically attractive, from a good bourgeoisie family, gainfully employed, has useful hobbies, and perhaps even otherwise pleasant to talk to outside of dating. 2) She claims to want to start a family and “actively looking”. 3) She claims to be happy and enjoying her life rather than stewing in misery and loneliness.
From all indications, she’s a catch? Yes? Just one (ok a few) teeny weenie problems:
1) Her hypergamy demands a top 1% man as shown by her dating app videos: High income earner, at least 6 ft tall (because she claims to be), and presumably in good physical shape. 2) She wants a man who typically only exists from PUA clown game: “initiates hard conversations, is FUN, considerate, kind but not a pushover”. It’s like walking on eggshells balanced on a tightrope while juggling chainsaws (and smiling). 3) She has a princess attitude. 4) The clock is striking midnight, Cinderella.
Even if she could get into a hot tub time machine and go back 10 years, she’d still be up shit’s creek with the first 3 issues but she doesn’t know it because nobody has given her The Talk including her Boomer parents. Nonetheless, even if someone did try to talk sanity into her, back then or now, she’d reject it.
I have videos downloaded and will show them to my daughter someday as a cautionary tale: Don't become this.
First-light Jr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
She probably got into this quite harmlessly. She may or may not have been a hoe at college. I would say probably not. She had some relationships with some good guys in her 20's but she (and maybe they) had other priorities. 30's the career really started to take off so she knuckled down and got on with it, adding in things like volunteering that she could fit in at will and any guy who was good enough who came long. Suddenly Cinderella remembers what her fairy godmother said about midnight but the good men she had in her 20's and didn't lock down plus having things her own way successfully for 2 decades just forbid her form seeing any joy in "settling".
I actually feel sorry for her if this is the case. The lesson to our daughters is its never too early if you are of legal age and a man you love comes along who has the house and the job to support you through child rearing. Later you can do all the things she called "itches", when you are already one of life's winners. Looked at from a totally selfish hypergamous point of view this still makes sense. Ignore the bad boys, ignore the guys who have not made it yet, find one of the winners who wants you and you want him. Then waste no time. What's the worst that can happen to a girl in this situation -nice house and alimoney, start the career you missed when the kids start school.
So this is what I have told my girls over the years. I even persuaded my current lady of the merits of this approach. I won her over when I said "Think of the guys who were better than me that you didn't lock down in your 20's because you said you were not sure of their character (A soldier turned organised criminal who was recently murdered but who had the lifestyle she craves left pots of money, cars and houses and his antithesis a highly principled journalist who rights serious ethical stuff and can be a bit of a stickler. I gather they would have married her if she is telling the truth) You ended up with me -an aesthetic eccentric who isn't into fine living and had plenty of kids by other women and you did it when you were old enough to find child rearing harder. You wake in the morning to light open fires, you muck out hens and I even like camping holidays" She took the point then and has never again told our daughter to put getting set up in her career ahead of family.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1mo ago
" Looked at from a totally selfish hypergamous point of view this still makes sense. Ignore the bad boys, ignore the guys who have not made it yet, find one of the winners who wants you and you want him. Then waste no time. What's the worst that can happen to a girl in this situation -nice house and alimoney, start the career you missed when the kids start school."
I ruminated on this for a while and want to address it separately: How the economics of this works: In my grandmother's time, certainly the smart thing to do was to leverage her youth to grab a winner, as you say, and then get set for life one way or the other: Either being supported by a man for life in marriage, or lifetime alimony. A no-brainer, yes?
But even back then, this is like trying to buy into a stock and make a killing after they announce the stock's "sure thing" on the news. In my grandmothers' time, there were far too many pretty women chasing after too few sure-things. At best, if you watched the film "Fiddler on the Roof", there's only ONE Rabbi's son for a village and he's not going to marry the poor farmer's daughter with no dowry EVEN IF she is pretty. However, in the movie which had a BS "free love" theme, one of the daughter's hit the lottery when she caught the butcher’s eye but she didn't want him because... he was old and fat. (Me as a kielbasa fanatic would pressure my daughter into taking it. Set for life, both of us!!!)
And THAT is what Women's Liberation was secretly about (among other things) which wasn't that women would become kind and generous with their empowerment, but could be as physically shallow as men were reputed to be: They wanted to marry hot guys. They see a CEO with a pretty wife on his arm and she wonders if that could be her, so to speak, if she became a CEO herself and got a hot guy. She didn't want to sleep with unattractive men because she (yuck!) NEEDED a provider and protector. She would be Strong and Independent!
The problem with that paradigm is that these women failed to consider that luxury that FEW successful men had required him to be the provider/protector for the hot woman on his arm, not just for himself. A strong, independent man doesn’t NEED a strong, independent woman EITHER.
Anyhoo, back to our daughters: Like with men who want pretty women throughout time, we gotta earn them somehow either via game, personal success, or hard work, even the prettiest woman is not going to get a rich guy, never mind a handsome one, just by waiting for the fish to jump into the bucket and fillet itself and fry itself on the pan.
The “hard-to-get” waiting-around game and ambivalence works great for women, collectively, to geld the mindsets of beta males but has little effect on the men they desire.
Few handsome men are young AND handsome AND willing to commit because one of the FEW benefits of feminism for our society is that such men can “play the field” unlike in the 1950’s where there was some social restraints on this. Most pretty women back then did not sleep around anonymously on Tinder. These men now have options and most, God bless ‘em, exercise them.
That said, there’s probably a GREATER supply of “good” men today for smart and virtuous women than there was for my grandmothers because most women have taken themselves off of that market, yes? Most single women past age 20 are winding up in the “hard-to-get” column, tattooed and face-pierced, polyamorous and don’t forget obese! Nonetheless, the few available men in the above category will likely need to be fished but it’s far more probable for a smart daughter trained to engage in investment, like my grandmothers: There’s lots of young men who show astonishing potential but they’re beta males: They aren’t handsome, they dress goofy, but they’re hard working and smart. It’s still a risk as the often cited feminist trope of the secretary who “puts a doctor through med school” winds up abandoned in favor of a hotter, younger model having given “the best years of her life”, but we understand that everything has an inherent risk, even minimal. We risk life or death getting into the bathtub or swimming at the beach.
First-light Jr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
Yeah spotting a good investment early is always a good idea but it comes with some big caveats -is the guy ready to settle for what is basically a permanent relationship on hold till he makes it? How many good fertile years will it take for him to make it?
When I say winner, you don't need a winner in terms of loads of money you need a guy who has his life together enough that he could support you if you got pregnant next week and who can get what he needs from life, who has enough skills with people or with his trade to be OK pretty much whatever. So a young plumber who has his first van will be OK, he can pay the rent till he has saved a deposit. If the girl is pregnant tomorrow, its OK. The guy is going to win at life. They won't be filthy rich and looked up t be society but so what.
In general I am not in favour of long engagements -you lose all the boost of newness that would make you compromise and work for "Us" Fertile years are lost and you will probably grow more apart in interests without the tie of children to bind you together. Some long engagements are worth playing for but if the guy is a good guy and he cares for hr and can take care of himself and her, its enough, why wait?
There are no hard and fast rules but the guy should be able to care for her and should want to start a family with her soon. She should want this too, then they should get on with it. That's what I meant. I don't mean shoot for top 20% or 80% of women are either left on the shelf or settle badly. I mean shoot for a man who has life sorted enough to be able to care for you and your children. If he is a good match and sincerely loves her, then its enough. If that means a few hard years at the start it is better they are together and starting a family than waiting to launch in comfort.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1mo ago
There’s a Russian “date” movie, “Moscow Does Not Believe in Tears” I think your wife would enjoy watching together and delves into the themes we discuss here. It’s a tale of 3 working class woman friends in 1950’s Moscow on a husband hunt. It gets cheesy towards the end, quite frankly, but the point is clear that sometimes you gotta just roll the dice and take your chances. I, myself, married a woman whose a real pain much of the time (she’d destroy ALL of you!), but has been loyal and hard working. She’s the quintessential “Soviet Woman”. I’m the same way: I joke with her that if she was a little smarter, she would have landed Prince Harry but she’d probably nag him away and she laughs because it’s true.
Anyhoo, back to this inspin: Her “princess” attitude is why she didn’t lock the men down. “Cook for a man and make him fall for me? I’m a Queen! He is supposed to exist to please me!” The good looking men she may have hitched up with from time to time simply didn’t feel a need to “settle” themselves.
I don’t feel sorry for her AT ALL. Would we feel sorry for a man who let good women go by because they didn’t clean his kitchen floors and didn’t cook his dinner precisely the way he wanted? Pandering to spoiled people is how the west is in an existential crisis.
This woman has ZERO empathy for you and I. I suppose I could feel sorry for her like I would for a crocodile that’s starving to death. There are some nice crocodiles out there. Google: “Pocho rescued crocodile.”
First-light Jr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
I still feel pity for many women in this predicament. They were all once someone's bright eyed little girl who was proud to be learning how to be grown up. They just didn't get good guidance and instead learned the wrong habits. She probably got told "you go gurl", she probably got praised for putting college ahead of boys, for getting a good job, for getting a starter mortgage and a promotion while it was only in the last few years that parents started to say "when are you getting married?" by which time she was already ruined by too much of what she wanted and none of what she needed.
Yesterday evening one of my daughters was praising a friend of hers who appears to becoming quite like her mother -kind, supportive, unselfish and good at crafts. I said "I think she will make a very good wife for someone who is wise enough to see it" "Why are you only praising her as a potential wife?" (I don't think this was a loaded question to get some feminist bashing from me, she just was thinking of her as a great friend) "Because that's what matters most to her future success and happiness" People just don't dare to say these things to young women these days. If you do not get a good man and start a family with him, the end is going to be sad for a woman, sadder than for a bachelor because men do not end up menopausal and struggling with life and are not as needy by nature.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1mo ago
In regard to the question you were asked. I’d respond that’s not true: The qualities that make us good husbands, or wives, aren’t solely for those purposes. Being a good husband and father also happens to make someone healthier and happier for themselves and a productive member of society and the same goes for wives.
What’s interesting is that this particular inspin’s video did appear to show her as kind and family oriented spending time with her nieces, nephews, and family members. It must puzzle her, and even her relatives, why such as “catch” as her is going unclaimed.
As the Oompa Loompa song reminds us of Veruca Salt:
“Who do you blame when your kid is a brat? Pampered and spoiled like a Siamese cat? Blaming the kids is a lie and a shame. You know exactly who's to blame: The mother and the father!”
Likely the cause of that is the mother and father are Boomers who values are out-of-touch with the society they created: The era of feminine entitlement and chivalrous patriarchal courtesy was killed by generations of feminism and corporatism. The era of a man waiting tables to get through college and then buy a home and ask out a woman on a milkshake date by the time they were 23 came to an end during the 1980’s.
As I said above, if we didn’t know about her attitude towards men, we could even like her as a friend. In that video, she looks wholesome. It’s when we see her other videos that she’s shallow, materialistic, and unempathic towards men who express sexual interest (not even possessing enough empathy to manipulate us via feminine guile!). She’s a crocodile (in Polish, I refer to them as Jaszczorka).
I use that term for a reason in that there’s a famous expression of “crocodile tears” where if a crocodile expressed tears and you got close, it would eat you up. Such women feed voraciously off of your pity and kindness, viewing it as a weakness.
That being said, I appreciate we need to express conditional empathy to save those that can be redeemed and (gasp!) “settle” for a happy marital life based upon kindness and mutual respect.
I’m reminded of when I go to Gator Park in Florida and watch the alligator handlers who still appear to have all their fingers.
My daughter's favorite song I used to play in the car, she's gotten tired of it but still learns French: https://youtu.be/1T9b0cax6s4
NotaBene Sr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
I agree with the first part. Disagree with "legal age" because I don't trust State marriage contracts at all, nor trust this craphole state to define marriage. They can't even define what a woman is. The State has no business in marriage at all.
Also disagree with the man already being "established". No reason that has to be a requirement. I was married at 20, had nothing figured out and no money either.
I'm in favor of arranged marriages, and I'm already scoping out the field for based young men. Made semi-serious offers to a couple already, and daughter isn't even 16 yet.
First-light Jr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
I am in favour of arranged marriages too, its not a must but its a great idea if you can find a match everyone is delighted in.
But the man does need enough establishment on his path. You need to see that he will win at his game. You won't arrange a marriage for your daughter to a man who has no savings, has no plans and isn't set on a career path where he will clearly make it. You might accept her choice if she meets such a guy and they have clearly chosen each other and he has good family but would you really arrange marriage to a guy with no clear idea and no clear prosects? The guy could be a big time failure.
20 year old student, good family, acing his courses, going into a profession or trade he is clearly suited to, really is keen to make something with your daughter and appears to really care about her, well OK arrange the marriage. I would probably say lets wait to marry when he has his first job and the house sorted even if its a rental. Otherwise she and he will have to be dead set on it of their own choosing for me to agree and he will have to be of excellent character. I would even then take him aside for a talk about his plans, explaining that the moment he has a child on the way, he will need to be the provider of solutions and that he is playing with fire if he marries her and isn't ready for fatherhood.
NotaBene Sr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
In arranged marriages, it doesn't matter nearly as much if "everyone" is "delighted". My choice matters, and the guy needs to see the value of what he's getting, but other than that? Why must all the women be "delighted"?
I certainly would. As a poor man, things like this matter very little to me. I make under $25k a year and have for decades. As long as the guy is willing to provide for my daughter (as the Bible commands him) and he adheres to that standard, that's good enough for me. My job is to make sure my daughter is prepared to be a wife and mother.
Whatever he does, I can almost guarantee my daughter's standard of living will go up. So I'm just not worried about it. I'm more worried that he would be working too much, as my father did, to the detriment of his family.
That's always a risk, but it's a greater risk if you let your daughter choose whom to marry. We all know they simply can't be wise about that at 16.
I'll do what I can to marry her off "well", don't worry. But my standards are different than most fathers. I make no apologies because my policies, as head of my household, have thus far produced excellent results.
First-light Jr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
I too make a fairly similar amount per year but I own my house company and land and so I am not going to struggle to pay rent and see my family put out on the street if I fail to have enough. A young man on a similar income paying rent with no trade to fall back on would be in a hard spot and I don't think it would be good to send my daughter out to work if she has small children as that is the time when a mother can do the most for them.
My daughters are likely to only go to more income but I have seen so many young men who don't understand budgeting and you do need a skill or a job in this world that pays unless you come from a close community that will make sure you get a job if you need one.
Everything is harder if you don't have a certain threshold of income. If you have land and tools and are actively trying to avoid the matrix its different but that isn't most people. A couple that are really hard up have a lot of marital pressure that other couples don't and its not a thing you would wish on your daughter. It will also make a woman look jealously on greener pastures elsewhere and that too is a thing you would not wish on your daughter. I am not talking great wealth but financial stability is needed (not the female definition but where enough comes in to make the family's expenses.
NotaBene Sr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
I think we mostly agree on this. My parents divorced in part due to my father being too successful. That is also tempting to a wife, perhaps moreso?
I won't let my daughter be married off to NO money, I just have very different standards than most guys. I think women are very malleable and can get used to poverty better than riches.
You are correct that poverty is a strain on a marriage - but so is debt. Honestly I'd rather a couple be debt-free and have very little income, than vice versa. Just a woman starting a marriage with no debt and no degree is a huge positive, and that's what I'm providing.
Apologies for quoting Proverbs at you yet again, but my wish for her is: "neither poverty nor riches." But I'm intentionally keeping my standards low for a 20 year old guy in this respect, because I remember what it was like to be that age and have nothing figured out.
First-light Jr. Hamster Analyst 1mo ago
Yeah I think we do more or less agree. I don't think women and debt go well together. Its just too tempting for them and then they also lack accountability -their husband will take care of that is a very easy thought for them and if he fails to then, well, its tempting to consider him just a poor specimen of a man.
I think the ancient and mediaeval concept of the wheel of fortune is a good one. from Carmina Burana; Fortune rota volvitur; descendo minoratus; alter in altum tollitur; nimis exaltatus rex sedet in vertice caveat ruinam!
One wants a place near the centre of the wheel, where one is neither exalted to a dangerous position nor crushed by the wheel's rim on the ground. There is less temptation there because you have enough and yet the vices of the rich are too costly to aspire to.