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Forums.Red / WhereAreAllTheGoodMen / Strong Independent Woman

Strong Independent #8849223 wonders why her success doesn't attract successful men.
14

MelkorHimself

Posted 1y ago in Strong Independent Woman - Permalink - Locked - 13.3K Views



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Overkill_Engine WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago Stickied

Waves her career around like it's a cock then wonders why the only men she can get are dickless.

Also, handsome men with money/good jobs have their pick of women, and they oddly enough aren't going to go for a type-A ballbuster that they still have to outearn and pass a dominance test over every day after coming home from work for her not to go into CuntMode 9000 and take him for half or more of his net worth.

Especially if she does not have a very traditional family that can reign in the worst of her impulses. "Motivated" women tend to be incredibly mercenary which makes them a bad long term investment.

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Problematic_Browser Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

As Saint Kevin would often say to these women: "put away your dick."

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moorekom Urban Hoe Guerrilla 1y ago

Perfectly said.

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AsianDude 1y ago

Agreed that the career women I have met typically have higher expectations. Considering that I have my own money and don't need hers, why would I put up with the depreciated looks, increased expectations, and a woman who has to spend long hours at work? Success isn't unattractive, but it often isn't worth the hassle.

My boss at work once 'introduced' me to an early 30s surgeon who was always busy and chatted constantly about work (cutting up patients and poking needles into people). Sure, I got a couple of free dinners, including at a Michelin restaurant, but I have been to so many restaurants over the years and it wasn't anything I couldn't afford on a daily basis. Thankfully, it was tough to schedule dates with her and she had high expectations, so I managed to give her 'reasons' to dump me after ~2 months.

Meanwhile, I was also meeting up with a freshman, senior, and a recent master's graduate, the oldest in her mid-20s. Instead of fancy restaurants, we would chill or go to $5 places and food courts, so the expenses were lower than dating the surgeon, even if I were to pay for everything. When I shared the same 'reasons' with these girls, some of the reasons where actually attractive to them and others were met with a shrug and a "So what?".

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polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago

And that's why the women rarely learn: The men don't want the drama from dumping a woman who thinks she's perfect so it's just better to let them dump us. One aging clock ticker I date drunk dialed my voice mail and threatened to slash my tires and kill my cat. She sobered up and told me she'd leave me alone a few hours later.

So my point being that because women are both entitled mentally and socially, they don't get any kind of honest negative feedback from men, and heck they don't want it anyway, so they reach middle age with a totally delusional perspective about the world.

To give you an idea of how this is: When I was a kid I showed my science project around and the adults all humored me and said it was great and then I overheard one mocking it. It was crushing but it was useful feedback that I took to improve and even now, chuckle at the legitimate point they made. I was 9 years old at the time and I was able to handle that but yet 30 year old women are more emotionally fragile than I was back then.

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AsianDude 1y ago

Some late-20s and 30s women have weird expectations, just because I have chatted with them a couple of times at social events etc. they start thinking that I would offer them commitment. One even booked a flight across the pacific ocean to ask me to marry her. Others (including those displayed on this forum) basically have exceedingly high expectations.

I learned not to be too honest with women that I am not close to. It is better to just nod absently along most of the time. Most women can't take honest criticism from acquaintances. It's better (for myself) to let them continue wondering why I prefer a younger LTR who respects me vs. a "mature and more experienced woman who is well traveled, independent, and knows what she wants now".

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Seagram7 Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

Projection. They emulate the traits they find attractive and think that men will think the same way they think. They are attracted to power and accomplishments so women will go out and get a degree and find some sort of job that has prestige and be a "boss-bitch" thinking that they will attract the same kind of man.

The girl in the post is realizing that the men she wants to attract because of her "accomplishments" dont care about her "accomplishments"

At my work, the tough, kick ass boss babe had a mini meltdown at the holiday party. Our DT (Defensive Tactics) instructor is a tough, kick ass, tattooed, weightlifting Chad Bro. I cant hate him because he really is a sincere cool guy that has covered for me when I fucked up. He texts everybody that has drank too much if they made it home. He has actually driven me home on more than a few occasions.

Anyway this girl really thinks she is a street solider that kicks ass. Plus she is hot, has an Instagram account with 120K followers and looks like a model. She naturally thinks that if he kicks ass, she kicks ass, it makes perfect sense that they should be together. He shows up at the Holiday party with the most petite, feminine, Asian doll. She had a mini meltdown acting absolutely baffled why he isnt with a tough chick. We tried to tell her that we get into pissing contests all day with the public and we dont want to come home to another dick measuring contest. I tried the opposites attract logic. She settled that he is not as tough as she though since he appears to be intimidated by powerful women.

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hornetsfalcons12 Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

If it wasn’t posted on Reddit, you’d think it was fanfic from a red pill guy.

The crazy part is, the results are screaming right in her face. Every single man that she seems to deal with is, by her own account, a “loser”. That could mean a lot of things.

1) she’s nowhere near as pretty as she thinks

2) her career striving makes her a massive ball buster, and dudes with options don’t want to put up with it

3) she low key loves the low lives and won’t admit it.

Whether it’s any of the above, or something else, nothing in this woman’s diatribe screams “I’m a good bet for the future”. Men are constantly not good enough for a “queen” like this, so why try when there’s billions of women that think they’re a catch?

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Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

I can already see the dudes that she's being shagging. Low life drop outs with tats, deal in drugs. Wonders why they can' seem to wangle their way up the corporate ladder.

This woman is retarded.

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hornetsfalcons12 Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago Stickied

More importantly, I’d love to see a list of men she’s passed over through the years and what they’re up to. I bet there’s quite a few winners in that batch.

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Land_of_the_losers the-niceguy.com 1y ago

If she were to run into one pot-head, I can understand that. But to KEEP running into pot-heads... she's gotta be seeking them out.

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Overkill_Engine WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago

I'm guessing she's selecting primarily for looks and charisma and then wondering why she's getting so many grifters that are able to get by on just that. And of course the potheads/addicts without either are beneath her notice, just like all the other men lacking those. And the ones with looks and charisma that aren't potheads/couchsurfers/grifter have no reason to bother with her.

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Land_of_the_losers the-niceguy.com 1y ago

All I can say is that if I were a "loser pot-head" I don't think it would make me one percent more attractive. That kind of life simply isn't for me.

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hornetsfalcons12 Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

Absolutely. She even states that one dude starting dealing from her house. Dude went from a 6 figure man to a drug dealer? Dude must’ve had some sort of edge that turned her on.

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SwarmShawarma 1y ago

6 figure man to a drug dealer

drug dealer all along, it is hard to keep appearances of working 6 fig job when you are 44 times in and out of house, so he looses job and accidentally starts new business :D

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hornetsfalcons12 Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

You may have got it. Business might’ve just been hurting when a lot of forced out of work wage workers didn’t have money, and maybe some “entrepreneurial spirit” themselves.

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Bob_and_Virginia Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

There's a saying: You ARE who you attract.

She might want to examine herself.

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Bob_and_Virginia Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

Oh just go get a "furbaby" already! You don't need no man! Don't forget the wine to go with your whine!

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Typo-MAGAshiv asshole. giga-shitlord. worst mod EVAR. 1y ago

Don't forget the wine to go with your whine!

Heh. I prefer "would you like some cheese with that whine? Some nice fromunda, perhaps?"

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Bob_and_Virginia Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

"36F" "Please help!"

You too old. That's your problem! You beyond help!

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Oddest-One-Here Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

36F would be fine if it was a bra size.

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Bob_and_Virginia Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

Hahahah! Indeed.

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GimmeTheUsual Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

"I backpack foreign countries alone as a hobby" - Yeah, we get it, you're run-through like a fucking car wash.

The reason she hooks up with perpetual stoners is its harder to notice your girlfriend is a complete slut when you're under the influence.

Don't worry sweetie, post-wall will help you understand that you're a depreciating asset. Even if you deny it every decade, nobody is going to touch you.

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nicknack 1y ago

it's funny how different the backpacking exprience is for men and women. i traveled cheaply to over 30 countries in my 20s and saw it firsthand. women just latch onto guys the moment they arrive somewhere, usually at the damn train station itself, and those guys show them around, usually provide food and alcohol too, and they fuck them and the girls skip the 8 euro bed bugged hostel they had in mind.

they get fucked by a new guy in every place they go, and sometimes when they stay multiple days they have to cling onto a new host in the same location.

i know this because i never got laid more in my life then i did traveling and being around these women. theyre far away from home and feel like theyre not experiencing budapest for example unless they have a romance there too.

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chunky 1y ago

Yep! I did this, in my mid-20s, it was amazing. Freaky German chicks, California girls, Dutch girls, Italian girls, girls from the Deep South. They all do it. So now that I'm in my 50s, I went back. It still happens. And now there's even more variety.

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nicknack 1y ago

Yeah man speaking of freaky German girls I was in corfu Greece and passed by a two ~20 year old blondes, stopped the car and pulled back. Parked right there and walked with them to get a beer at the first bar in town, and walked down to the beach and one blew me and swallowed. All within like 30 minutes.

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Impressive-Cricket-8 Founding member of FapGPT 1y ago

I'm beyond the wall and I'm better than you in 50 different ways - and I can list them.

WAATGM?

Dating a 20-something y.o. who can cook and won't nag them to death. Is this the origin of double alpha - since she's an alpha herself and the man must be better, he has to be a double one?

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SpiritualEnema Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

She doesn’t need a man. She has become man enough for all parties in the relationship.

You wonder how long it would take for the spinsterhood to give her actual constructive advice. I won’t hold my breath, they would have to acknowledge that men have desires and (gasp!) they are different from their own.

Score another one for muh patriarchy.

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Land_of_the_losers the-niceguy.com 1y ago

She doesn't need a man, she needs a tax attorney.

Only THEN will the Alpha Male of her dreams fall head over heels for her.

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Overkill_Engine WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago

They never seem to grasp that the men that are OK with there being two penises in a relationship are fucking other men instead of dating women.

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Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

Exactly. If we wanted to date a man, that is what we would do. there is already a thriving community where men can meet up with other men and play with each others dicks.

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polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago

Here's my theory: Three things stand out: One is she says things appear to go well until she talks about her career. Men on dates generally want to get laid so it take a LOT to kill a boner. She's vague about it but she claims management. One gal I went on a blind date via an agency said she worked for the IRS as an auditor. She didn't try to soft pedal it and it killed my boner quick. I think if she had been more tactful, we could have had a discussion about it.

Next, she says that she is "direct" but "gets asked out" by the wrong men. She doesn't say anything about asking men out and getting shot down. That is an option for women (women who claim to do so have a 50% success rate with getting dates). She probably wants "Tingles" and can't stand the thought of rejection.

Three: She claims to be "very pretty" which is not an objective way of assessing attractiveness. I know actual chads and they wouldn't describe themselves as "drop dead handsome". They'd be honest, if asked, and say they are "conventionally attractive". She probably thinks she's pretty because there are men hitting on her, even if they're losers and her friends validate what she wants to hear.

Finally, perhaps the reason why the guys who are pitching at her are druggies is that despite her desire for a conventional corporate guy, maybe she has face piercings, tattoos, and wears Goth stuff. Look at single mother bailout profiles often posted looking for such a guy and they have septum rings. They don't make a basic effort to even pretend to be a reborn trad-wife.

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Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

You know, I think a majority of women think that they are 'very pretty'. This stems from two things;

  1. Girl culture these days is that they all go around praising each other. In fact, if you are a woman, and you are dog ugly and over 250 pounds, all of your girl friends are going to continually say 'you're sooooo pretty'. Over and over again. Its mandatory.

2 If you are even average looking, men will continually approach you all the time, from the age of about 18 onwards and tell you that you are the most beautiful girl in the world. That you should be a model, be in movies etc. The reason? Because they want to get in your pants.

This is the reason that totally mid and also disgusting looking mingers go around thinking that they are 'very pretty'.

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Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

You know who's a good example? Billie Eilish. She genuinely thinks that she is 'very pretty'.

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Problematic_Browser Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

Gross. Just... Gross

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Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

I guess we're intimidated by her. Yeah, that must be it. We're intimidated by women that are able to function like an adult.

Joking.

She is basically asking "Why don't successful men want me"

and the short answer is

because you are too old.

Successful men are men with options. And they have better options than you.

Next question please.

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Land_of_the_losers the-niceguy.com 1y ago

Whenever I walk down the street, and I see a woman exiting a bank wearing a well-tailored business outfit, I slap my palms to my cheeks , scream in terror and flee in the opposite direction.

It's just SO TERRIFYING when a woman looks and acts professional!!

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Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

Exactly. If a woman has a job and place to live, and is able to dress herself in the morning, I just get so INTIMIDATED.

My little dick just shrivels up and it won't come out to play. I can only get hard for helpless women that can't do anything.

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NotaBene Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

I get emotional too, but it's more sadness. Same feeling I get when I visit cities or pass a daycare. "This civilization is doomed."

Also, business suits on a woman looks horrid, and have ever since the 80s when everything had shoulder pads built-in. Just no way to make that look good, like pants.

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SwarmShawarma 1y ago

https://www.trp.red/images/14d4018e7cad53ac675517ba3b49f28f.png

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reignoferror00 1y ago

That wasn't the image I was expecting for a response to him.

My first thought was it would a photo of a Lingerie League Football player. (in response to the built in shoulder pads looking good part)

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throwawaycactus6012 1y ago

"I would try to hide my success on dates and that usually got me pretty far with the successful guys. However, the moment they found out about what I did for work they usually would friend zone me."

I'm wondering what her job actually is. Is it that she's successful at her job, or is it the actual job itself which is a dealbreaker?

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GimmeTheUsual Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

Well, knowing that women never claim responsibility for anything, my guess is that she's annoying as fuck about her career. She's clawed her way up to the top, (or more accurately, given dispensation because this society prioritizes women over men), so when she finally ropes in a guy the first thing she does is brag her ass off about it.

The dude wisely clocks that she's one of those "Boss Bitches", which means that she "knows her worth" that directly translates into "not doing shit for you" in a relationship.

Guys are really good at sussing out what is worth the effort, and she makes the decision stupid-easy for them. I think its a good mechanism to prevent men from sinking resources into a black hole of validation.

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Problematic_Browser Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

These business bitches will never understand.

We aren't repulsed by successful women. We aren't intimidated by powerful women. We aren't scared of independent women.

What is happening is that we just don't want the things that come with it. We don't want the "boss bitch" attitude that they've grown. We don't want the hyper-competitive nature that they have. We don't want the wasted youth. We don't want any of it.

Men want the things they traded away to get what they have. They chose to walk the path that men walk then get mad when they get the outcomes men get.

They should learn to date like men if they want to live and work like men. Men, especially successful ones, date down. We date women well beneath our social and economic standing because that is all that's left when we become successful. If those "strong successful independent" women would learn to do that, their dating woes would disappear overnight.

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mallokrano 1y ago

Her entire post oozes with hostility towards men that she believes are underneath her. Heck if you read between the lines I am not even sure she could date a guy that fits her requirements because she'd still find he isn't "driven", "ambitious", and/or a "go getter" enough to meet her expectations. Setting aside she has chosen these "losers" (which mind you some could actually be successful compared to the rest of society but her expectations are out of the galaxy), she still assumes that there is a guy out there that will meet them. It is no wonder why she can't find a guy, she would eliminate 99.99999999% of them in a heartbeat, and the very very slim that do meet her expectations can easily find a much less hostile and non-competitive woman who is 10+ years younger.

There is no way she will ever find a man, but this post isn't actually looking for advice, she is just looking for other women in the same boat to "there there" her and tell her that her way of things is most totally correct. I feel bad for the cats in her future, as if they don't meet the mice quotas and be "productive" in her eyes they may be kicked out just as quick as the men were!

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reignoferror00 1y ago

Maybe you try asking out a man that is somewhere between stoner in basement and A-type personality executive? Oh I forgot, a regular 9-5er doesn't excite you and you actually searching sounds like work. Need that frenzied super motivated guy - even if his motivation is selling meth.

Your supposed ideal, a super motivated top career driven man, would want nothing to do with you or anyone like you. That's the last type of woman they are looking for. So instead of going for a regular guy, you'll go for a guy that talks a good game of "go getting" bullshit? Sounds about right.

Just make a deal with an high level executive guy that works 70+ hours a week. Just pay him on contract to pretend to be your boyfriend for functions. Not like you'd see each other that much anyway in a real relationship with you both spending almost all your waking time working.

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nicknack 1y ago

Translation from womanese "why are the only HANDSOME men who want me weed smoking bums?" well sweety, handsome men who have their shit together wanted you when you were 24 not 36. now its either average men (ew) with decent ambition or handome bums. you seem to be only choosing the handsome bums, so enjoy.

you literally chose your career over finding your best possible match, its too late now. you have the career you wanted instead

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GimmeTheUsual Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

Now that I think about it, the whole 'they smoke weed' thing is probably just her hamstering reasons why they reject her. Because in her mind, there's no WAY they could be rejecting her personally. It must be that stanky weed!

LOL, they probably only hit it after work or something responsible, and she blows it up into a big drama-queen event.

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Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

She needs to do some soul searching, and the question she needs to ask is: why am I looking for a man? Why do I need a man? What for? What would it give me to have a man? What would I be able to give to him, how would I make him happy?

Then should could ask herself, why is she attracting 'the wrong' kind of man? The obvious reason is that she is 'strong and independent' and she thinks she wants a strong and independent man, but there is no way that a S+I and and a S+I woman are going to be able to live together. It has never worked, will never work. She wants to call the shots, so she hooks up with betas, and then she is disgusted with betas.

If she every did settle down with an Alpha, she would last 2 weeks. There is simply no way an alpha man is going to let a boss-bitch run the show.

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NotaBene Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

I own my home, I live debt free, and have made some very smart investments

Good for you. What do you need a man for? Certainly not a provider.

I'm pretty successful

A woman's success is (and has always been) defined by being a good wife and mother, period. You just spent the best years of your life barking up the wrong tree. You have lost the capability to be a successful woman, even if you wanted to.

I'm very pretty

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You do not get to decide if you are pretty.

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AurelianWay Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago

She's not as pretty as she thinks she is. Maybe she gained some weight & isn't as hot or thin as she was 5 years ago. If she was top shelf pussy she wouldn't be putting up with freeloaders as she would have a lot of suitors to pick from.

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SwarmShawarma 1y ago

She chose the thrill. Men without ambition is metaphor for criminals etc Replace every unmotivated with thug and you will get the picture.

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Overkill_Engine WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago

Yeah she's picking Jeremy Meeks and wondering why he's not CEO material.

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WhereAreAllTheGoodMen

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We're just a bunch of clueless NiceGuys™ with kindness coins that don't seem to work in women's holes so that the sex we're "entitled to" falls out. Because apparently we weren't demonstrating good relationship material through the attention, respect and stability that women demand. We were only "pretending" to be nice just to get laid.

In response to r/niceguys, this forum is dedicated to exposing all the women who complain about wanting a "good man" after dating jerks and riding the cock carousel in the prime of their youth, and think they're deserving of commitment and financial stability when all they have left to offer is their depreciating looks, narcissistic mentality, used-up vaginas, and another man's kids.

Women in their 20s have numerous opportunities to date the decent men they claim to want, but many reject or friendzone these men for jerks and promiscuity. She takes advantage of a good dude's kindness for attention and favors, then accuses him of being a bad person who thinks he's entitled to sex.

But when she's in her 30s with depreciating looks, jerks who won't commit, the likelihood of being a single mom, and the social pressure from her married friends, she asks "Where have all the good men gone?"[1][2] Funny how back when she was chasing the bad boys "Being nice is the bare minimum", but now that she's past her prime and needs a bailout, she wants a man with nice guy traits.

Furthermore, dating jerks and riding the carousel before settling down with a good man is planned by many women, and encouraged by feminists. They then come to the dating market with unreasonable standards while offering little to no value themselves. Such women are totally unaware that the mature, stable men they now need are the same decent men they rejected, except these men remember the rejection and are responding in kind to avoid unstable, unappreciative women who view them more as ATMs than romantic partners.

The reason women end up here is because their behavior is not exposed as the lucid, self-destructive, feminist ideology that it is. And we're here to help Good Men guard their commitment and resources by exposing women who would make poor life partners and mothers of their children. Providing observations and opinions on the posts here allows us to better understand women's psyche and later depressive/miserable state when they are not held to a moral standard required for healthy, functioning relationships.


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Recommended reading:

  • Understanding The Purpose of WhereAreAllTheGoodMen

  • Dating profiles showing women's Dual-Mating strategy and unreasonable standards

  • OkCupid study shows women reject 80% of men based on looks alone

  • Mate Selection for Modernity: Studies show that the more a woman achieves and the higher her expectations grow, the lesser the pool of eligible mates available to her.

  • r/FemaleDatingStrategy advises women to delay sex with good men but freely give themselves to fuckboys

  • Milo - The Sexodus: The Men Giving Up On Women And Checking Out Of Society

  • Dalrock - They’re back in your 20s where you left them.

  • Kevin Samuels - You're Average At Best

  • Paul Elam - Where the Good Men Went

  • Women Want to Know Why Men Don't Want to Marry Anymore...Allow Me

  • WAATGM mod explains why promiscuous women can't get good men to commit.

  • Michael's Story

  • u/where_muh_good_mens' Story

  • "What Happened to All the Nice Guys?"

  • Okay, I get it. You're sick of hearing men complain about girls only dating assholes.

  • Feminism has succeeded

  • Dear Girls Who Are (Finally) Ready To Date Nice Guys: We Don’t Want You Anymore

  • Dear Single Moms: I wasn't your type then, why am I all of a sudden your type now?

  • "I’m 43 and Alone – Can I Find a Good Man?"

  • To The Guy I Left In The Friend Zone For Too Long

  • To The Man Who Will Love Me Next

  • The Truth Behind the Increasing Social and Economic Disparity of Modern Society and Why Good Men Are The First To Leave

  • The Truth About Single Moms Who Bring Young Children To The Dating Market

  • Carol asks WAATGM for the harsh truth after riding the carousel

  • The Life Story of Carol

  • Memes

  • Complete list of resources here.

Link Flair:

  • The Big Question- Carol asks "Where are all the good men?", "Why can't I find a decent guy?", "What happened to chivalry and respect?"

  • Bailout- Carol wants a man to help raise her kids and provide financial stability.

  • Leftovers- Carol whines about how hard dating is as an older woman.

  • Dual-Mating Strategy- Carol admits to promiscuity and dating jerks but now wants a good guy to settle down with. Alpha Fucks, Beta Bucks.

  • Cock Carousel Rider: Carol complains about being single while having a history of promiscuity.

  • Entitlement Princess- Carol has unreasonable standards while offering little to no value herself.

  • New Carols Unlocked!- A list of all the Carols we've identified.

Content Archive:

  • https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen

Related forums:

  • WhereAllTheGoodMenAre
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