Im almost half your age but I remember when my old man was was around your age, single and looking he would jog 2 miles to the bar in his sweats, get a few drinks, hit on some women and jog back home. He got with some good looking women too. (I only know this because i later found out he dated my kindergarten teacher, who 5 year old me recognized as hot and was about 20 years younger than him) i asked him how he could do that and not be embarassed, he said after a while you dont care about things like that anymore.

To summarize, a balding, sweaty, bespectacled man wearing sweatpants at a bar, your age was able to get young women by not giving a fuck.

Cultivate habits that lead to your goals. Don't rely on motivation or "drive." Motivation is fleeting.

Go back to your van. I strongly believe in staying out of the financial and emotional comfort zone whenever we feel weak and un-driven!

Always. What's changed is now I have abundance enough that I don't need to give a shit about if/when I hit a woman up again

I'm starting to lose it when I'm hitting on random girls, but it keeps coming when I go for the first date with her.

I'm actually considering being more selective with my approachs, worried about desensitizing myself through that proccess.

I guess the answer is different for every guy. For me the answer is no, I no longer get the same rush. Does not mean I am not happy or enjoying it, but that headrush and butterflies I used to get has diminished to almost nothing now, even with new attractive girls. I do not really miss it. A bit like eating a great steak, after you eat a few hundred, it is hard to get too excited.

purely based on the looks. And even then, the thousand vagina stare should be talked about because shit gets old. I mean I understand amused mastery, but I don't understand how people don't actually think "what a loss of time" deep inside

It's the hunt. Most guys like that more than the lay.

It's got nothing to do with the girl

My ex walked in my place when we were early on in the relationship and it was the first time i'd ever say a chick was "stunning". For a split second i was almost intimidated but i shook that shit off immediately. Those feelings happen but you dont act on it. Maintain frame always.

Of course

It never really goes away. So defeating the inevitable oneitis is more about internalizing AWALT and "she is nothing special". The more women you fuck the more you realize that they are all the same.

The rush is different. Now I get more of a rush because I was a complete baller and did everything right, rather than my old "oh shit I am lucky, I can't believe I got this girl".

It just feels so good to get in the flow,day everything right, respond perfectly to every shit test and make the girl almost begging you to rip off her panties and fuck her brains out. Now I get more of a rush because of the power rather than just the sex.

Start with your male friends. Cultivate your social circle. Imagine you had a satisfying relationship with a great girlfriend. How would the rest of your life be arranged? Do it.

Daybang - Roosh

The Game - Straus

I'm a fan of mystery method, it's a great starting point, if you're working from 0

My advice, train, train, and more trainning. I was really shy and learnt to get rid of it by exposing myself into the danger. If girls are your problem, start talking to random females in your routine so you feel a little more comfort, it's a normal interaction between people, that waitress at the restaurant, or the person at the grocery store, then move to random girls on the street, help tourists with their maps, ask for directions and keep scalating until you are able to speak with everybody. Other option, if you're in a local, start talking with random guys, it will help you warm up and then you can move to girls.

My real source of succes was my own hate to myself. I used to see many great girls pass and was too coward to even say hello, sometimes I even wasted girls hitting on me so I realized I really wanted to interact with them so some time ago I decided that whatever happent, how bad I felt, how big was my anxiety I'd go and talk to them, it was like a promise to myself, and it worked, since then I've never seen a girl that was approachable and interesting to me that wasn't hit by me.

I consider taking a man's children away, and not letting him see them as immoral. It is legal, though.

On the other hand, having sex with a willing adult, in exchange for a pre-determined amount of money, is illegal, though for me it is perfectly moral.

Society imposed, external morality is a shame-based control mechanism. Screw it. That doesn't mean you cannot have your own moral values - and everyone does, don't let them fool you. It just takes experience and intellectual bravery, to build your own morality, one that serves you, in the most general notion, rather than limits you.

The entire premise of TRP is that society feeds you blue-pill values which do not reflect reality. As an example, most TRP guys seem to think cheating on a woman or dating a married woman is a bad idea but they don't judge those that make those choices. You get to define your own values around here, but the main idea is to face reality (swallow the pill) and do what's best for you given that reality.

I bang hookers in places where it's legal.

look at the girl and say "oooh is this guy your boyfriend?" and she will say something like "eeeewwww no way, Billy Beta is just a friend, he's like a brother to me. i would never date him!"

also followup with a random compliment to BB to AMOG him more. something like "cool shoes man i like those" - that will make him look like even more of a jealous little beta bitch when he say's you're being creepy or tries to move the girl somewhere else.

don't explicitly say it but maintain the frame that you're a cool, friendly guy having a enjoyable with a girl who is having a good time and the other guy trying to break it up is a jealous orbiter getting butthurt and acting possessive for no good reason. this is an easy frame to hold since it's pretty accurate frame of what is actually happening

depends .. what part of mexico? bigger cities tend to be a little bit closer to our culture in the US, stupid feminism is on the rise over there .. smaller towns are very much different.. SMV is very well noticed, and monogamy is still a thing which could very well be a double edged sword.

The general idea remains the same. Demonstrate high value, do not put others down, do not let others step on you.
Also, do not seem too "out of reach" cause girls will be afraid that you are out of their league.

The goal of approaching is to be in a position to have an extended conversation and escalate things towards a romantic relationship, or without escalation in which you create friendships. You do this by building commonalities, using past & future projections, and seeding reasons to meet again later and/or to continue the interaction at another venue.

The first step in building new relationships is identifying and cultivating commonalities. Stretch the conversation out through past & future projections, create a link in her mind using memories, imaginary as they are, and branch off of statements. Nearly every statement has two topics (or more). Natural conversation isn't questions followed by answers, it's mostly statements spun off into new directions. This is the "gift of gab". The baseline "secret" of doing this is to follow this simple rule:

Relate your experiences back to her using THOUGHTS and EMOTIONS.

When telling a story don't just spit out a bunch of facts of events and what happened. Tell her what was running through your head and what you were feeling when the event occurred. Use analogies as well for things that women might be more familiar with (shopping & movies are huge).

Bad conversation:

My TV broke last weekend during the game so picked up a new one Monday after work and of course Best Buy sucked as usual.

Good conversation:

I was watching TV last weekend and just as my favorite team was making the last drive to tie the game it broke. Just...poof. Nothing. I was soooo frustrated. Have you ever been watching something you were so into and then your power or cable go out and you miss a really important part? Doesn't that suck? Worst still is when I went to Best Buy the sales people were no help. Ever been shopping and everyone sorta just ignores you? Hellooo! I'm right hear people! Talk about frustrating. You know what I mean? I just kept thinking to myself 'I wonder what would happen if I just made up some popcorn in the appliances section and kicked off my shoes and lounged on the couch and popped a movie into the display setup they have?' That would kick ass and you KNOW they'd come running to see what's up.

Get the idea? Thoughts, emotions, and use what I call "checking in" to see if they're following along:

• You know what I mean?
• Have you ever...

The key takeaway is you want them nodding their head, or even better piggybacking onto your conversation thread and injecting their own stories as they relate to yours.

Building Commonalities

There are several types of commonalities:

• Direct commonalities - the things you have in common

• Indirect commonalities - things your friends may have in common with her, or her friends may have in common with you

• Negative commonalities - you know nothing about the topic but would like to learn more

You build commonalities through the following methods:

• Respond with a fact
• Respond with a description using thoughts and emotions
• Negative commonalities as a rapport break
• Clarify commonalities using 4WH (see below)
• Personal stories focusing on the topic at hand, not yourself

There are 3 general rules when building commonalities and having conversations:

1. It should flow like a multilayer cake. You give a little, she gives a little
2. Statements then questions, not just question after question after question
3. REWARD, then statement, then question

Note: 1 & 2 touches on Vertical vs Horizontal conversation, 3 is basically "Qualification"

Vertical vs Horizontal

A good way of getting them invested in the conversation is vertical conversation. Horizontal is the surface stuff, basic AFC questions that feels like an interview rather than an honest conversation. Vertical digs deeper and marries together building commonalities and getting them to jump through hoops via qualification.

Check-ins also help keep vertical conversations going:

What was that like?

Really? Tell me more.

4WH

As shown above, check-ins often make use of 4WH, which is a great way of getting more open-ended answers: What, Why, When, Where, How? Who is already covered since it's you or her.

Seeding the Conversation

The goal of the preceding conversational tactics is to draw out information from a woman and to keep a conversation going. The reason for this is to build some rapport and generate some investment on her part, which is what translates to attraction. The following explains what to do with that information in leading up to the close. Keep in mind that "closing" in this sense is different from closing mentality which is a whole other topic, so I won't cover that. What I'm providing here is what gets you their contact details, nothing more.

The first step in closing is actually identifying commonalities, which is a large part of why one needs to become conversationally savvy. Generating investment through qualification and making statements are simple ways of making sure they'll want to keep things going. Another good way of making sure you talk about topics they're interested in. The 4 most important topics people generally care about are:

• Relationships & people
• Hobbies
• Career/jobs
• Travel

If you're after younger women then you might want to discuss topics more specific to this demographic as evidenced by female media geared towards their age range (eg Cosmo):

• Beaches
• Shopping
• Movies
• Partying

Ideally the topics you wish to discuss should be ones that are important to you, just as you would with qualification. This is important because the commonalities you build will be based on real-life experiences or aspirations you might have.

Once you’ve got some topics picked out, relate something about yourself to one of them and you're off to a great start. While discussing these topics you’re actually seeding reasons to close them whether you realize it or not, so don’t just touch on a subject and change the subject. Actually spend some time talking about the topics. Get detailed, and use the skills I spoke of previously, namely describing how you feel and think when performing the activities that are the topic of conversation. Don't do what most guys do and just mention something and then move away from that conversational thread onto another topic. Flesh things out a bit. Qualify them on the topics at hand. This is how you create a genuine connection and get them invested.

tl;dr - One of the simplest methods of being interesting is to be interested. This should occur organically by using ended questions that dig deeper and deeper into what makes her tick. These open ended questions lead into qualification and escalation, but those topics are outside the scope of this post.

Wanna know my secret? I have three go-to questions that universally work to inspire conversation. I use them IF there are no other obvious topics on hand and/or I'm not thinking clearly enough for various reasons.

1) What is the bravest thing you've ever done?

Depending on the answer, you can tease them, act impressed, or if it is some deep, dark sort of thing (I hear rape-related answers to this on occasion) go into a more personal discussion if they're comfortable.

Always leads into "well, what else would you WANT to do but are too scared to?"

2) What is the nerdiest thing you've ever done?

This one is a bit of a weird one but usually helps figure out what sort of girl you're dealing with.

3) What is the kinkiest thing you've ever done?

Great way to get into sex, escalate if you want, and again gauge what kind of girl you're with. if she immediately starts talking about the 12 man gangbang she was in, you have valuable insight.

Again, don't get too used to using these, but if you are trying to keep her interest and keep the convo going, keep them on hand to deploy. They're no substitute for genuine charisma, though.

I like the Dane Cook approach. I find it's not important what you talk about, if you can say it with energy, and constantly make random connections, wave your arms around etc.

Throw in some teasing, negs, and give her any reason to talk about herself, and you're in.

Don't be afraid to piss her off. Angry women are engaged, bored women are indifferent.

Approach her, ask her about herself(something that is evident from the way she looks/is acting/ the situation you are in). Keep what she is talking about going by asking more questions or commenting on what she said unless if you have a relevant story. Assess her responses/ body language as you go, and you"ll find out if you've made a friend or if this girl is interested in you. If its the second one, ask her out. If the first, being socially competent is a good thing.

Just ask some open-ended, emotionally-charged questions with a lean towards making her qualify herself.

Bitches love to talk about themselves, and she'll catch on to the fact that you're judging her suitability as a mate. Add in some teasing to her answers, and you're in.

you're not depressed, you're sad.

keep lifting to keep your brain right, and keep a journal about your feelings, Jordan Petersons JRE podcast talks about the emotional response to memories, worth a listen

Take responsibility for your life and start working on yourself, a little bit of improvement everyday leads the massive change in the long run.

Forgive yourself for your failings, learn from them, and keep growing.

It may help to list out what you need to improve most and get to it.

Because hard nexting a woman is a show of high SMV and they subconsciously know it. They are also hurt because they could not lock down that particular high SMV male.

TRP is amoral , don't feel bad just because you decided not to LTR some redflag-filled girl.

You should go for the game that suits you. For plates you go with the former. For relationships you go with the latter.

What they are doing are what I'd call "Nuclear shit tests." The end game is to either turn you into a beta provider or guilt trip the hell out of you. Women crave that type of drama, control over a person. The worst thing you could do is break frame and give them that control. You made a mistake reconnecting with them.

It truly depends on what your strategy is with game. If it's LTR oriented, you need more of your second option. If short term plates or ONS is your goal, go with the first option. An overlooked concept on TRP are "Comfort Tests." Passing these are vital for successful LTRs and long term plates. I see them as nearly the opposite of shit tests as they test the fact that you aren't too much of an "asshole." Women do want to feel loved, and too much of being an asshole can turn a woman off just as much as a failed shit test. I would argue that passing comfort tests while maintaining frame is just as important as passing shit tests in an LTR/Long-Term Plate.

As much as I've looked, I have found no clear answer to this.

TRP is certainly amoral much like the sciences, but applying it is certainly immoral by many standards. That's why I always hear members say "there is no right or wrong, there just is".

They realize that the only way to adopt what they believe with they do is to adopt "amorality". (although there are contradictions; claiming that it doesn't matter if you alpha-widow a number of women while also being angry in the face of injustice)

They all tell me that I have hurt them in some way, often by hard nexting them, with some of them almost tearing up. I have never realized my behaviour had this amount of impact on them and have started feeling uncomfortable hurting this women this bad.

You mishandled ASD. She has buyers remorse - not enough comfort, perhaps you didn't qualify her enough, it's a result of her not being able to rationalize having sex with you.

Once you aren't fucking/relationship, their emotional lives ceased to become part of yours. This isn't about TRP game, this is simply avoiding being an emotional tampon, except you do it for your own alpha widowing...

Fogging is always your friend, acknowledge the statements they made, without admitting guilt, apologizing, or giving a value judgement.

• Yeah, I can see how you would be hurt by that

Then wish them well, and carry on your day. This is one of those 'why is a stupid question' examples I use often. Once they've exited your life, you are polite (because why not be?) but you are not engaging, women have to earn that, and for whatever reason, these women didn't do enough to keep it. Why are they like this? Who cares, focus on how to disengage, because clearly this conversation isn't for your benefit.

Why they think this? Who cares, thats for them to figure out. If you don't do things you cannot live with... you are your own judge, and will not apologize for someones emotional problems

Don't shit where you eat. If it's a professional setting with coworkers, then you keep it professional. If it's at a convention with alcohol, all bets are off.

Do not actively pursue office relationships. In addition to the usual office politics of a group environment, HR departments will crucify men on the slightest allegation of impropriety regardless of merit. A woman who feels jilted or offended can be very creative with allegations. Remember, HR departments exist to serve the company, not the employees.

Use office connections as a social network to branch outside of the office staff. Don't date the receptionist, rather bang her sister.

you're not responsible for her feelings. You're also not that important, they fall hard, they get over just as hard.

Just do boundaries, and get over yourself, you're more interchangeable than you think

23 - 29 was my big years, and made up for lost time.

It was boring before I started PUA, that made it a game, and it was fun again.

What I got tired of was bullshit, I grabbed one at 29, after a stripper flaked on me, one of my other FWB. Occasionally one of the crazies comes out of the woodwork to reminisce, only 1 still looks bangable.

It was the realization that chasing girls was not my mission, it was getting in the way of my mission, and a 23 year old that was low drama, and could drywall beat the other dozens of girls that couldn't do shit but suck.

Still auditioning for the part, and I'm still prepared to replace if it goes south.

How long have you been spinning plates? Do you get tired of the churn? Are you tempted to seek LTR?

Personally, I prefer some kind of connection with women I'm sleeping with; even my plates are long term, part time. I like the having more than the getting.

Key advice: Relationship talk is the woman's prerogative, and you DON'T have to initiate this conversation to get to sex. When I learned to STFU and escalate, it surprised me how late in the relationship (well after we'd started having sex) and how little relationship talk she brought up on her own initiative.

Read the slight edge by jeff olson. Good stuff. Read meditations by Marcus Aurelius. And do what he says focus on the little things, you live on a planet of infinite beauty and you feel like every day is the same??

Yeah, it's called a goal. If you can't picture who you want to be in 5 years, get on it.

And aim high, be specific, break it down by timeline. Having more money isn't a goal. doing 3 career pivots, and moving from analyst to manager, and could be

Read "The principles that govern social interaction" from Manhood Academy. Despite the title, it contains valuable information about going from chaos to order. It helped me an awful lot while going through a dark period.

Edit: Google it and you can get the pdf for free.

changing your life completely in one go is not a good idea in my opinion, you might not have the mental strength to go through and burn out and goes back to the old lifestyle (that was what happened to me multiple times anyway). What I do now is just taking it slow, get my mind slowly becoming comfortable with the changes. Go right ahead and start with stronglift 5x5 is my recommendation.

Start building good habits, things will become second nature once those actions becomes less of a chore and more of an ingrained habit

Every day is your life, just in little tiny bits. So what you do everyday, all added together is your life and what it will amount to. There is no arrival point where you just make it and your life turns around, you have to create the life you want every day and live that life every day. Don't wait, it never just arrives.

Yeah, there's a model: KEEP DOING IT. That IS the structure.

Here's what worked for me... develop a vision. That sounds simple, but it's pretty difficult to come up with a vision of what you want from life. To develop a vision you have to really think about what you value. Do you value adventure? Honesty? Strength? Power? What do you value?

Once you've figured out what you value, use that information to figure out what the ideal life looks like to you. Then make a plan!

The motivation will come naturally because you will have the answer to "why?"

Mind you, this is not easy, and it will take a tremendous amount of effort to get somewhat right. There will be much trial and error until you land on things that speak to you.

Also, don't be attached to your vision. If it's not working, change it. Put in the effort to be the creator of your life. You will have a new lease on life.

Rome wasn't built in a day

find what works best for you. I found that changing my diet helped everything fall into place. Your stomach has bacteria that affects your brain. Healthy diet = healthy mind. Once you got that worked out, start every morning with a cold shower. You feel a rush of energy and it will help you kick ass all day. Next, add structure that works for you. Example: work 9 - 5. Gym 5:30 - 6:30. Eat 7-7:30. Read 7:45-8:30. Relax 8:30-bed time

Unfortunately, for many men, they have to destroyed by women first (crushed by their oneitis, cheated on by their girlfriend, divorced raped, etc) before being mentally primed to accept the red pill. If they are still high on blue pill feels, you'll just be speaking Greek to them.

You are right that a lot of RP is not currently politically correct. As such, do not talk about Red Pill.

Lead by example. If your friends are interested they will come to you. If they are not interested, leave them be. There is nothing more annoying than somebody criticizing your beliefs.

Better to ask what makes a man masculine, his testosterone is certainly the driver. Understand what makes a man a man and you'll figure out women by converse and what they lack that we provide and vice versa.

if this relationship just ended, try some self focussed improvement, you can always come back to girls after you feel good about yoruself and are no longer emotionally effected by your previous LTR.

Set your target higher. Changing difficulty level after you master a game forces you to sharpen your skills/self. It can get the motivation juices flowing again.

If you're currently gaming 6's-7's, try 7's-8's.

Or... If you can't be arsed putting up with the constant shittests (which I totally understand) which are served up by hotter women, recalibrate with your current one(s): add an extra plate, get them to cook for you/buy dinner or push their boundaries in bed.

thats not you caring, thats you being boring. What do you do in life that wakes you up in the morning?

I guarantee if you can answer that, you know how to be interesting

Dont lie in the future. You dont have to lie to people to be successful. You told her it was exclusive and it wasnt.

Fuck your guilt, that's because you broke your promise to monogamy.

Yes.

Wont go into my past in detail, but essentially I was a blue beta through and through and thought 'doing the right thing' was truly the path to what I wanted/happiness. (Spoiler alert - lost everything from future plans of career to social circle to support system. The truth is no one gives a shit about you wxcept for people who understand what you are goong through - here I supppse it's rp tranformational growing pains)

This is why I tend to disregard the (rather horrendous advice) that 'you alone are completely responsible for where you are'. You can't say that if you think you are doing the right thing/beem brainwashed lied to by everyone/everything. But if you now know, NOW your responsibility for where you want to go is yours. So give yourself a break, perhaps even a little pity. You have mine. But after some time, get the fuck out of bed and force yourself to do something. Baby steps. Then Walk. Then sprint. Then climb mountains.

The single best killer of depression is accomplishing something. This can be anything from literally getting out of bed because you have to pee(I have been there), to going to the store to get milk, or something infinetely more extreme when you are up for it(like taking a 6000 mile road trip when I tried to kill myself)

Personally my biggest reasons for depression becoming a crimson knight was seing how fucking desolate everything is for a straight cis white male. Yes you are alone, but not really. Some Men are out there for you. Like me right now. You don't know me, but I have your fucking back bro.

Try to identify the parts of your life that are missing. Then focous on having them not missing. You may find you need a plan for a semblance of a life worth living before you can take definitive steps and act towards the big picture. This is why I have had many false starts in my life.

But right now get out of fucking bed to pee, lol.

Women will get together with a man she likes and try to change him until he changes into something she doesn't like. If you attracted her, that means that what you're doing is working.

She is not pushing for commitment, she is pushing for dominance. Saying silly words to a partner is not any sign of commitment. However, trying to turn a partner into a Talking Suzie doll is a sign of attempted dominance.

Keep doing what you are doing. It is clearly working on some level, so she really doesn't need all the sugar talk. If she doesn't like the relationship she is free to move on - which you appear to not care if she does. Either way you win.

If you want to add some Comfort, the things you do and say must be your initiative. If she sets the agenda, the process becomes a Shit Test rather than just a Comfort Test.

The advice listed below is sound. I would recommend you stop watching porn as well. Porn really messes with your head regarding dick size, performance anxiety, keeping it up, ejaculation. Give it a shot. Good luck.

Try to fuck as much as possible, so don't be too picky. Take it as an exercise for hotter women. After a while you'll see sex is not such a big deal.

Sexual dysfunction is not a problem of the person, generally it is a problem of the couple. Your anxiety is most probably not focused on sex itself, it has wider scope, and just makes itself evident during sex.

Try monk mode, get sex out of the way for a while, and work on having interactions were you feel fully accepted. Take it from there.

When the problem exists in your head, so does the solution.

stop thinking. Go out specifically to fail. keep failing, and actively try to extend how long you can go before you fail.

Remember that movie the accountant? this is your wooden stick and heavy metal

I barely talk, and when I do, I cut it off when that happens.

Moms learned quick, I'll next her if she doesn't straighten up

Step 1, don't live at home. The less they see you, the less they try to intrude into your life.

Ignore your dad and treat your mother like a child.

Yeah, I know.

You never lost it. Let it out.

if you are keeping it solid and emotionless, then its on her, not you. She is placing emption on it that isn't there. sounds like a girl thing to do.

it was only X

This is what happens when you talk about stuff with girls - they enjoy the drama.

Instead try "Don't do that". Then do not discuss it. She responds "Do what, I didn't do anything", and you say nothing. You've made your point.

Other times, start with the saying nothing.

Big infractions: leave without saying a word. This is the most effective way I have ever found to deal with girls. It drives them mental and they are terrified of it - far more than anger or discussions or drama or talking. It's the only thing I've done that makes the girl apologise later.

Ultimately though, you want a girl who doesn't need this level of control to behave decently.

Man has 3 tools, commitment, affection, and attention. They are given teeth with your SMV.

you aren't using the stick, but removing the carrot.

The simplest way for me to explain it is to pretend she's a little kid. As in, a 4-year-old.

Your most powerful weapon is indifference.

Imagine you are seeing another girl on the side, one who doesn't do [annoying thing]. You wouldn't even bother to correct this chick's shit, you would just laugh at her ignorance and drift away to the better option.

This girl knows exactly what she's doing wrong (even if she's not conscious of it), because she's testing you. A laugh and a shake of your head is all the punishment you need to administer. She'll either fix herself to win back your approval, or she'll double down on her shit and you eject for good. Win-win.

Withdraw attention.