Those single dads are the only guys who would take her seriously, but she rejects ironically enough because they remind her of herself and her own problems. I don't know what you would call that, but it's the opposite of empathy, perhaps deep down she really just hates herself for being such a failure and projects it these men. Instead of making the best of situation and either returning to her child's father or forming a blended family with a single dad she opts to ride the cock carousel, big fucking surprise there. Modern women are worthless, especially if they are single mothers.

"This date was bringing up resentment on behalf of a woman I'd never even met."

Yep, reminds me of when a woman I was seeing casually said she expected (and got) princess treatment from previous boyfriends.. I saw a picture of her and the guy together and felt resentment on his behalf, something Jungian maybe. or a disturbance in the force...

Sorry, I couldn't get all the way through the article. Her senseless blathering made me recount times where my X-Wife would senselessly blather and I found myself judging her for that.

In the five years since I've been single...

Rules for thee but no for me. As long as she can't live up to her own standards, the only thing will be useful for is a wet hole. At her age, even that's starting to dry up.

This article is just so full of good stuff, that I barely know where to begin. Well done to @Land_of_the_losers for finding it.

I could start with this

If they had equal custody, I felt like they were the enemy because I didn't want to think about my own sons being taken away from me

Wow. Nobody else spotted this. I mean, just wow. This woman is saying that because she is a failure of a parent, she can't bear to be with a man that is not a failure of a parent, because it only serves to remind her of what a failure she is. Wow. The men are being rejected for causing a very slight bit of self awareness on her part. Wow.

Have a think about how misandrist the court system is. How much they favour women. The normal woman gets 95:5 custody. If there is something seriously wrong with her, like drug use or if she is a risk to the children, she might only get 50:50

And here we have a woman saying that she was in the process of losing 50:50 custody. So, there is something REALLY wrong with her. And she won't date men that are not failing, because..... it reminds her that she is a failure.

Gosh.

I have no words.

As a single dad, there are things that we don't do that single moms do...a lot.

1. We don't abandon our kids to go party.
2. We don't choose pussy over progeny like single moms do
3. We don't ask women for money for our kids
4. We don't ask women to be a "mother figure" for our children

In short, when you're dating a single mom you have to take her kids into account. When you're dating a single dad, you won't even notice unless he wants you to.

“At the time I was fighting against losing 50% of my time with my kids”

This is a major red flag regardless of what it actually means. On one hand it could mean that she wanted 100% custody and was trying to fight against the father having ANY contact with his children. On the other hand it could mean that she was potentially somehow getting less than 50% custody. One thing I know for certain is that in this gynocentric society women start at a default of 50% custody and it only goes up from there. If this crazy person actually was worried about getting less than 50% custody that means she is a grade A loser or drug addict.

Both are substantial red flags.

"I want a man who will make me his first priority, That way I have time to make my kids my first priority."

The answer has been to date men without children, which I've found to be easier, as I only have time to date when my children are with their father.

Interestingly, the non-fathers are just as hard to make plans with as the dads because they're equally busy, albeit with travel, hobbies, and friends, not looking after kids. I've found that they tend to be more casual in terms of relationships than single dads who are usually searching for a life partner.

Someone is rationalizing hard to avoid admitting that they have been fuckzoned. And given how she treats men with kids, while having kids herself, she deserves being treated as the weekend cumrag.

My only concern is that she doesn't hold her dates to high-enough standards, so she will end up settling for someone who is .01% short of being super-ultra-dyno-mega-supreme perfect for her.

She deserves the absolute best!

At the time, I was fighting against losing 50% of my time with my children

Or, put into normal person speech:

I'm such a selfish, spiteful person I'd rather deny my own children's humanity in order to weaponize them against their father than accept their need to have him in their lives.

This is a great find. I stumbled across it earlier this week, but lost the tab I'd opened it in because my phone restarted before I could finish reading it. That's what I get for browsing incognito!

A'ight, on to the shitshow:

"How was that conducive to fatherhood and a relationship?"

How does anyone do anything when they aren't by each others' sides 24 hours per day?!

This date was bringing up resentment on behalf of a woman I'd never even met.

Plenty of empathy for fellow wahmyns, but zero empathy for any men. Yet another woman who doesn't even view men as people.

But I couldn't see beyond the things my ex probably said about me in our custody situation.

If I had to guess, it'd be that you're an unreasonable bitch who can't see anything from anyone else's perspective. Female solipsism at work, and a particularly egregious example.

At the time, I was fighting against losing 50% of my time with my children [emphasis added]

Ever noticen how women almost always say "my children" and almost never "our children"?

and it stirred up panic and loss for me

Yet you can't imagine that your ex- husband or any of the other fathers out there might experience the same fear of loss?

If the app didn't require me to mention my children, I didn't.

Yes, let's hide important, possibly deal-breaking info from people. Even better: why don't you sleep with him a few times, love bomb him and act like the perfect future wife, get him to propose marriage, and then spring it on him that you're divorced and have kids?

Instead, I would bring it up only when it was relevant, which sometimes meant I never heard from them again.

*cue Nelson Muntz:*

HA-HA!

Smart men.

Interestingly, the non-fathers are just as hard to make plans with as the dads because they're equally busy, albeit with travel, hobbies, and friends, not looking after kids.

In other words, you only prefer them because you're a hypocrite who doesn't view men as people.

I've found that they tend to be more casual in terms of relationships than single dads who are usually searching for a life partner.

Alternate viewpoint: most men who give single moms any chance at all, it's only a chance to be his plate, whereas the single fathers are more willing to be serious with you because of the similar situation.

I'd rather my dating life was simple.

It doesn't get much simpler than being a casual fucktoy.

Did she really just type a wall of text glorifying her permanently short term relationships with childless men?

I sometimes wonder if this is just click-bait, poor me, or validation/attention seeking. So I looked up the author and found articles she's written with titles like:

I've been an expat for 20 years. Facebook has been at the center of both the best and worst parts of my life abroad.

My partner and I moved to Spain, had 2 kids, and then separated. Now, I'm not allowed to move my kids home.

All my children were born not breathing, and 2 didn't survive birth. I buried myself in work to avoid my grief and it backfired.

I took a SWOT analysis with my partner. 8 years later I see how our 'weaknesses' told us we were not going to make it.

So yeah, that's who she is. English teacher from UK living abroad. She makes money writing curriculum, study guides, etc. Basically a Philosophy major cum MA in ELT. She now wants to write romance novels in Italy.

I'm beginning to see a pattern in these types of women. I call it the "Eat, Pray, Love" gang. They go to Italy to "find themselves" and end up getting fat by eating all the delicious foods and coffees. Next they go to India to lose weight on a Vegan diet while they meditate and do yoga. Finally they go to Bali and head over to Ubud where they find Prince Charming. I've been to Ubud twice. Before the Eat, Pray, Love book came out and after. After, it was flooded with middle age women of all sorts. Single moms, boss babes, you name it. They all go and hunt down the dude who was in the original book. It's fucking insane.

If the app didn't require me to mention my children, I didn't.

Why not? Are you not proud of your kids? Didn't you fight for 50/50 custody? Oh, they were getting in the way of being pumped and dumped. Completely justified; carry on.

Single motherhood is complicated. I'd rather my dating life was simple.

Who could have seen that coming? I wonder if this was, somehow, preventable. Oh well, you can just keep hiding your kids.

Spreading your legs for years for Chad to unload in you and then beat feet outta there would make life hard. Who the fuck could have predicted that? And the fact that you being a single mom, older in age, looks declining rapidly and still holding on to those high standards has made it even harder to date. I just don’t know what the problem is, honey, it’s a mystery why your dating life is so hard.