TL;DR

John has a history of cultivating a harem of exclusively attractive Asian women. He has been caught before but each time he shrugs it off and plays more women.

Summary

This is from a podcast titled the fever. You read the transcript [here]( http://web.archive.org/web/20150622190932/http://gimletmedia.com/episode/27-the-fever/) and listen to the original [on soundcloud]( https://soundcloud.com/replyall/27-the-fever). The first half of the podcast is some sluts recounting the horrors of dating this player John, and the second half is them bitching and moaning about yellow fever. I will only be summarizing the first half, which is relevant to this discussion.

The story goes like this. Suzanne meets “this really cute guy on OkCupid.” This man’s name was John, and he acted like “one of the best boyfriends [Suzanne] ever had.” (In other words, he was doing a good job playing her). In Stephanie’s own words, “John was Scandinavian, muscular, attractive. He seemed unreal. Like a dream boyfriend.” Gentlemen are you still with me? These women that bitch about yellow fever have it hot for the muscular white guy jerk.

John plays Suzanne like a musical instrument. One day, Suzanne accesses John’s computer, and learns that it contains multiple pictures of attractive women, some of whom he is kissing, and he has multiple chats/IMs ongoing simultaneously with other women.

Suzanne immediately calls John back to his apartment. Fearing the worst, that he may be a serial killer (a logical assumption), she makes him strip naked before entering. As she moans and argues with him about how life is unfair, the doorbell rings, and another one of John’s plates shows up. Suzanne somehow musters up the intelligence to find out that John was sleeping with at least four other women.

At this point, the story transitions to Phoebe’s experience dating John prior. Phoebe is another slut that got played by John. And what Phoebe tells us is magnificent:

Phoebe loved John, but after watching him betray her over and over again, she broke up with him. In their time together though, she’d actually seen John accumulate two cycles of women. In each cycle, he dated up to ten women at once, three to four serious girlfriends, and several casual relationships on the side. Each time, one woman would find out, warn the whole group, and the harem would implode. It’s kind of like when a spider meticulously creates its web. After a storm blows it away, the spider, unfazed, simply begins again. The email Suzanne sent Phoebe was actually the third “Hey everyone, our boyfriend John’s a cheater” email that Phoebe had gotten.

Phoebe also informs us, that this has been going on for three generations, and that all the women John dates are Asian, and these sluts all feel very gross about that.

In summary, Suzanne and Stephanie talk about how triggering and emotionally devastating it was to learn that their alpha BF/plate handler John was dating other women. Their horror increased tenfold when they learned that John liked Asian women, and solely dated them. Read the first half of the podcast; it is rather entertaining. The second half of the podcast is juicy too, but not as important for what we need to discuss.

Lessons Learned

1. Give no fucks

In the second half of the podcast, we get this:

STEPHANIE: He never returned any of my calls or emails. But he has a website with his name and the only thing on the website is a quote that says: “It’s better to be hated for who you are than to be loved for who you’re not.”

As you probably suspect, the girls find this attitude frustrating. The thing is, John doesn’t care. He wants to date multiple attractive Asian women simultaneously. Guess what—that’s exactly what he does. His reaction to the girls: ¯_(ツ)_/¯

2. Women will always go after the bad boy

John was muscular and attractive. He was charming. He was either a natural PUA or learned it. Either way, he successfully seduced women. Women who decided to date John did so because they were attracted to him. No one put a gun to their heads. All of these women are attractive mind you, and none of them dated nice guys. Let that be a lesson. Be nice all you want, but you’re not going to get tingles from them. Attraction comes first. Comfort later.

3. Don’t feel sorry for women; exploit them to your advantage.

Women like players, players are charming, and women get played. It’s how the world works. Don’t feel sorry for them. It’s not your fault that they lack the capacity to distinguish a genuinely good partner that will care for them from one that they are uncontrollably attracted to that doesn’t care about them. Sexual strategy is amoral. If you don't want to play women, that's fine, but don't kid yourself into believing that other men out there won't.

John recognized this. He understood that being charming and playing women works to his advantage. And so he lived his life free of regret and did just that: he played women.

4. Don’t apologize for your preferences

John dated solely Asian women. The women in the podcast thought he was “a fetishist.” It doesn’t matter what they think of him though. What matters is what he thinks of himself. Maybe he really was a fetishist, but even if he was it doesn’t matter. He knew what he liked—Asian women—and he sought that, giving no fucks about what other people think.

Be like John.