Kind of fukked up.
Have had a very mid life.
3 options (none great)
1) Get my CFA and learn to code and live at home for a year while I study and save an extra 50k - then move back into the city (at 29)
2) Get my CFA and learn to code and live in NYC and survive but at the margin not saving much and study most of the week
3) Just learn to code and live at home/NYC. And then basically be free in 6 months instead of 12. The 6 months is also a lot lighter than the hellaciousness of the first two options studying for two things for a year
Turning 28 in 4 months, and need to start feel like I'm grinding. I want hella money saved up, I want to date and have fun times in the city, and I don't know if sacrificing a whole year is worth it. I lived there for 3 years and just moved home - working remote
Stats: 100k total saved rn. Body Count ~15.
Intrepid_Place53900 1 1y ago
you want to get your CFA, ok, what's with the coding piece? Why do you need to code as a CFA?
get your CFA and live at home, forget the coding and focus on your career.
have fun in the city = $$, save your money and don't spend $$ on women
hmatts 1y ago
I think a shift to coding is the main priority. CFA is just for personal fulfillment. And I still want to have fun lol
[deleted] 1y ago
[--removed--]
hmatts 1y ago
What do you mean lol
[deleted] 1y ago
[--removed--]
nicknack 1y ago
I sacrificed a year at basically the same age and ended up making better friends and a solid relationship, there’s something about seriously working on yourself that attracts genuine connections with people and positive energy. That “sacrifice” will be anything but a sacrifice when you look back at it.
The only you thing you miss out on is sleezy pointless nights out with friends who use you and nasty sluts or party girls you shouldn’t date
hmatts 1y ago
really fucking needed this.
[deleted] 1y ago
[--removed--]
nicknack 1y ago
It’s a tough one because it’s hardwired into our brains to fucking love that and we’d probably prefer it to even food or sleep so I don’t have any other advice other than sheer willpower. Which isn’t a bad thing to train up at all. I managed to do it but I kind of needed to, I was broke, now I make slightly over 6 figures and can support myself. Was worth it for me, but I think it’s time to do it again to try and get towards that 200k mark.
hmatts 1y ago
Great point. I've been thinking about this more, and I'm realizing that I value that highly. I am thinking about option 2. Focus on the present and the future. The money will come. Being 27 single in NYC may not.
hmatts 1y ago
Other side of it, is maybe that period from 29-32 might be even more crazy, with the year off. Only thing to think about there is the hairline
nicknack 1y ago
You can get on a solid dose of finasteride. Will lower your libido and should improve your hairline from where it is now. In about a year and a half you’ll have a more solid head of hair, and better finances as you’re high libido didn’t have you out chasing ass all the time.
hmatts 1y ago
hahaha. will I have to be on it forever? Aka will my libido still be low when I come back.
And dude, just really leaning to moving to the city temporarily. Even for the social life. Just dying out here in NJ.
Lone_Ranger 2 1y ago
You want to date? ?? Are you planning on going back to 1958?
Dating is over, haven't you heard? Seriously, why do you want 'to date'?
There are 2 things you might be interested in at your age.
"Dating" seems to be a shit way to find either 1 or 2. If you read about cultural trends, the social commentators are all pointing out that 'dating' is dying. Young men are turning their back on the very concept. And the reason is because it is terrible use of resources for young men. It has a low cost / benefit result. It's something that has massive benefit to women, but very low benefit to men. So they are turning their backs on dating and going back to 'sharking' - just going to bars and pubs or joining sports clubs or whatnot to meet young women.
You seem to be mixing two requests here - you are asking what you should do with your life career wise AND you want to know if you will still be able to have 'fun times in the city'.
At your age, I would be 100% focused on your career and networks. You are still the underdog in the market for sexual exchange. I would 100% throw myself into the grind, forget about sluts and work on my career. Sluts will always be there. There will never be a shortage of sluts.
TRPDuryodhana 1y ago
Perhaps op should be also be open to hookers, if he can afford them.
Escorts can improve game: https://theredquest.wordpress.com/2017/05/26/escorts-can-improve-the-rest-of-your-game/
Why women don't like hookers: https://www.forums.red/p/TheRedPill/24902/why_women_don_t_like_men_that_hire_prostitutes
Edit: Totally agree with the grind part as well; very few people in redpill are talking about low cost/benefit ration in chasing most women. Though I think it can push you towards MGTOW state of sorts, if you take it too far. Life without infantile games of women becomes so peaceful, for instance.
hmatts 1y ago
This (and the poster below) is a really good point. Does anything change with knowing that I'm breaking 100k? I've had good success with 1 in the past year, and think I want to lean into that while I'm young, while also focusing 100% on my career. Will basically have a little bit less saved, but will basically be paying for the experience (and socially, too). Thinking of this route tbh. Enjoy the present, while working hard for the future
No-Stress-Cat 1y ago
My question is why the fuck do you want to live in NYC?
Lone_Ranger 2 1y ago
I guessing
1) highest salary range in the country plus decent career progression ops 2) most gender imbalanced place I have ever been in the world. The ratio of young women to men is insane. If you are ok looking, tall and have a way with words, you can smash on demand. I visited a lot for business when I was in early 30s, and picking up chicks was the maybe the easiest I have ever seen. Those chicks were desperate!
Would I live in NYC? Not for all the tea in China.
lambOfGod 1y ago
Why not pursue both? Work 60 or 80 hours a week for a year or two or three and go at on friday nights and weekends to the bars.
If you look decent, you just need to put yourself where there are lots of girls and do some social shit and you're done.
It's really not that hard.
I think you are trying to cope by actually saying "if I grind like an idiot for a year and make & save lots of money, I'll be better and chicks will jump my dick". News flash, they won't.
Most chicks are fucking bums for short-term exchange, and that's what you want also, because otherwise you'll be a beta, even for a long-term shit.
Most chicks are fucking immigrant arabs and africans in Europe and US because white boys are too cucks and beta to be bothered to look decent and approach. Do you think those immigrants have anything going on for theirselves? They live 5 together in a one bedroom apartment for fuck's sake, yet they smash white girls every weekend.
So fuck this shit, pursue both, you're gonna die anyway. Get money and fuck chicks at the same time and if a girls happens to want more, filter out the trash and see what rises to the top
hmatts 1y ago
Thanks man. See my other comments. This is what I'm leaning to. I can make more money. Can't come back on time. Apartment viewing today.
Sacrificing some peace of mind, but I think I can stomach that over sacrificing the short-term joy