Run. Fast.

I'll only focus on 2 things here. First, if she thought her previous boyfriend was abusive to the point of causing her "trauma", chances are exceedingly high she'll think the same of you. And in this day and age, the line from a woman accusing you of being abusive, and accusing you of rape, grooming, assault, harassment, and a variety of other felonies that will fuck your life forever, is vanishingly thin. I'm absolutely serious when I ask: is this woman worth jailtime?

Second. Even if you say yes, life with her may become so hellish that prison will sound like paradise. You will spend most of your time fixing all the shit the other people in her life did to her. I don't know about you, but I'm not in the business of playing therapist to people I don't know, especially for free. Every little interaction will be loaded with a thousand lbs of baggage that you will have to unload. Frankly, I'm surprised she let you hold her hand. Lots of women like this won't even let you do that because they've been so "traumatized" by something in their past.

But wait, it gets worse. Whenever there's a conflict between you two, her trauma will always trump whatever you come up with to justify your needs. You need emotional support because you lost your job? Sorry, no matter what's going on in your life that you need support for, it's nothing compared to her "trauma", so your needs will have to take a backseat. Everything will have to be done exactly according to her specific instructions, lest she falls back into whatever hell she's barely out of, and if you don't do it that way, then you're responsible for her new mental anguish, which means you now become the abusive ex-boyfriend (see above about where that leads to law enforcement getting involved).

75% of a successful relationship is finding the right person. Seriously. Relationships are hard enough, and life will throw you enough curve balls regardless, why do you want to make things harder by starting off with a woman like this? It's not like she's your sister or mother that you have an obligation to care for. Find a woman without mental trauma, weird sexual hangups, who generally has the same goals in life as you do, is open, easy-going, and flexible when it comes to building a shared life together, and you'll be starting your relationship journey already on 3rd base on your way to home base. Start this journey with a woman like this instead, and you'll have to break into the stadium and stitch your own baseball before you even get a chance at bat. And the field will be hot charcoals that you have to run through instead of grass. Why choose this option?

"Asexual gender non-conforming" i

urgh

We get some boba and start chatting, and thats when she starts bringing up her past traumas

what the fuck

like how she had an abusive ex boyfriend, family drama, eating disorder, all that. I also asked her what she's looking for and she says something long term. Keep in mind that I didnt say anything about what I want.

christ, she's a trainwreck. Funny though.

she started holding my hand.

gah this is awful

Anyways should I keep her around and try to make a move and escalate? Bc of her curfew the only time she'll be available is during the day. But other than that idk if all of that baggage is worth it. It seems like she got really attached because shes been sending selfies and good night/morning texts since then, and during the date we did a bunch of affectionate, relationshippy shit.

Ok, are we being trolled here?

You are straightttttttttt into "her" frame. Straight into relationship shit without any sexual contact, in fact she's declared herself "asexual".

What will happen next:

She will increase her demands (are we exclusive? do you really like me? where is this going?) and keep stringing you along without sex until you've proved enough to try to assuage her insatiable need for security before you get uncomfortable and weird duty sex....... at best. At worst you get nothing but rape accusations. After you nut you'll realise none of it was worth it.

God I hope this is a troll post.

Sex first. Relationship shit SECOND. Or like..... tenth.

Hard pass. This woman is basically doing a circus dance in your face with red flags.

If you want a plate you might be able to make that work. Def not GF material and it sounds like she knows this too, so some of the "flaws" can get used as features accordingly. I've plated more than one woman over the decades who was eager and good in bed with me but was a past or present bi who usually preferred women.

Rather than actively drop her, you might work on the attraction angle, tell her something like some good hetero sex may help her work on aforementioned past traumas. If she agrees to your terms, you get NSA sex out of the deal. If not, she drops it and nothing lost.

all women have "traumas".

More red flags than the CCP!