Attainable Mid Syndrome
Post is dedicated to Senior Endorsed Contributor and good friend @MattyAnon who originally explained to me a few years ago why mids don’t like being approached by attractive men at the clubs.
Phenomenon
Guys often ask why women who are generally considered 5's or soft 6's (on the standard attractiveness rating scale from 1-10) are generally bitchier and more unpleasant when approached, even when the guy is attractive and he logically concludes that she should be happy to be approached by an attractive man, when she is only just a mid.
Likewise, men often ask why such women have such an audacious entitlement complex, often boisterously demanding they deserve a man who is six feet, six figures, six pack, six-inch p.... portfolio, even though there isn't any discernable reason why they deserve those things, have even earned such opportunities, nor have match capability with the very men they assert that they deserve.
Rarely do you see a similarly unpleasant or brazenly entitled high 6 or above woman, and if anything, those women are actually generally a lot of fun and pleasant to date. But how could it be, that when 5's or soft 6's are actually approached by the very same attractive men they claim to be God's grace of the Earth to deserve, that they often immediately whip out the bitch shield and even preemptively reject these men out the gates, often foregoing even a token shit test he can try to pass?
Male Perception
A lot of men find enjoyment in the mid because they perceive them to be easier and unintimidating - attainable - compared to other women, because they are mid. There is also an overabundance of mids to go around. Rejected by one? Well, there is yet another mid within the vicinity somewhere else, often within spitting distance. Also perceived as good "practice" to men who are learning the ropes with nothing to lose.
Thus, the average mid is often a temporary pump and dump, some guy's Tuesday or Wednesday, or not even on his radar to begin with. The only men who generally prefer the average mid as a romantic option - aka long-term dating - are men who are looksmatched to her because he is also a 5 or soft 6, or worse, the man is a high 4 or below who pines for her unrequited love as his best "option" that he has.
Mids are still women though, they are hypergamous and don't like to settle with same-level men.
The other appeal of the mid is that - while she is not viewed as very inspirational or a woman men yearn to have - she is still more appealing than firing up The Hub or going for a true slump buster (a 4 or lower). Men don't need to be drunk or desperate to be willing to bang a mid, and none of their buddies will shame them in all the group chats for hooking up with one.
Diagnosis
Attainable Mid Syndrome (AMS) is characterized as a learned defense mechanism and internalized set of personality traits that are developed to protect mid women from being the lowest perceivable common denominator for short-term suitors and bad dating options who are either looksmatched (4-5 looks men) or hypergamy matched (6-7 looks men) and who primarily want mids for recreational use only.
This defense mechanism ingrains a developed jadedness towards the quality, or lack thereof, of suitors who do not meet the standards or long-term goals that mids have as women.
AMS is also characterized by an impulsive or obsessive desire to flaunt sexuality or increase their perceived sexual market value (SMV) by multiple points with makeup or other temporary faux sex appeal cues to snag the attention of men well beyond their SMV bracket, as if all men care about is sex.
Additionally, they may resort to demanding entitlement to things they can't earn, yet feel they should have, through hollow attempts to convince the world of what they are owed. This manner of cope serves as an obnoxious attempt to escape the endless cycle of being the girl who is good enough to get but not good enough to keep for most quality men.
Development
Apart from developing AMS from repeated pumps and dumps by men out of their league and unworthy serious "options", mids often develop AMS from high-volume approaches in single people environments where they are hit with waves of endless, unserious thirst and undesirable slop approaches.
For instance, mids are bombarded nightly by waves of stammering chucklefucks and their pet retards with the worst conceivable opening lines you've heard in a club with the delivery of breath five PBRs deep, while her more naturally attractive friends get better suitors. Afterall, unlike her more attractive friends, the mid gets YOLO spammed because she is in her natural plane of perceivable existence as easily "attainable", and often presenting herself all dolled up as Chad Bait, which has the unintended effect of looking slutty and more accessible for the night to every other guy.
It is even worse on dating apps, where lower mids see 2,500+ likes in two weeks or less of firing up a new profile with four bathroom selfies. The mid does not even have to try on apps to even get hawt matches, yet men will still swipe on her like crazy. Men are not afraid to swipe left on a mid, though. She will be hit with a disproportionately higher amount of "wyd?" and "want to come over?" DMs while guys choose their strategies more carefully on more attractive options.
Prognosis
The bombardment of undesirable legions of slop attention and slop romance makes attention itself become anathema to the mid, as the act of approach in of itself has been classically conditioned to activate webs of disappointment and confrontation neurons in her brain, resulting in chronic bitch shield and feelings of deserving more for perceived hardships and unmet expectations after being told she's "pretty" for years.
Ironically, the bitch shield and delusional standards cope of an AMS-stricken mid only further lowers her statistical odds of finding potential hypergamously satisfying suitors who also find her to be relationship worthy because she has become an antagonistic and uncooperative bitch without the looks to offset it.
The AMS mid therefore inevitably takes misguided corrective steps to acquire and sustain more attractive mates. She plasters makeup on and hypersexxes herself up with gimmicks as if all men care about is sex, which inevitably backfires because eventually her makeup and her bougie, seductive clothes must come off, causing her SMV to plummet instantaneously, akin to men opening a fluffy bag of potato chips only to realize that 80% of it was vacuous air and shameless false advertising.
This manner of cope serves as an obnoxious attempt to escape the endless cycle of being the girl who is good enough to get but not good enough to keep for most quality men.
Side Note: Women with Late-Stage AMS will often rightfully conclude, even if subconsciously, that they were never actually that pretty, but wrongfully conclude that the viable alternative to dating by appealing to great men is to girl boss and get a degree to be closer to high value career men, as if men care about that.
Side Note II: With Terminal AMS you usually see these mids reach levels of contempt and misandry where they pump out toxic TikToks and Insta reels about how all men are "trash" and other slop tropes as cope, a surefire indicator of severely untreated AMS.
Treatment
The mid who is afflicted with AMS inevitably enters an endless cycle of becoming even more jaded and disillusioned with the dating process, doing anything BUT raising her relationship market value (RMV) to attract potential suitors. For trying to overexaggerate her SMV to escape her natural SMV bracket is always the wrong move with predictable dating end results.
I. The only viable, long-term resolution for AMS is to instead raise RMV over shallow SMV manipulation.
II. Requisite self-reflection is needed to escape the cycle of pump and dump mediocre results, the AMS mid needs to grasp that she can, indeed, appeal to men's senses by being a great woman to a man without jaded gimmicks, and that success is possible.
III. The mid can make herself more femininely beautiful with subtle makeup instead of slutty makeup, use more feminine hairstyling, wear clothing choices that project feminine presence and energy, and acquire more feminine hobbies. By offering genuine peace, satisfaction, and femineity to men, she paves the way well for her improved dating success.
IV. Rather than the mid embarking on her villain arc against men and entrenching herself even deeper into feminism and misandry, she can politely decline bad approaches, many of which will be less frequent with visible RMV upgrades. She can also especially self-select out of shitty venues like clubs and Tinder. She can also avoid congregating with angry, disappointed mids to keep herself from relapsing.
V. Daily doses, taken as needed, of lowering one's expectations is a critical step to honest self-reflection and a requisite starting point for meaningful results, dating improvements, and authentic happiness.
Diagnostic Criteria for AMS
Attainable Mid Syndrome (AMS)
Personality Disorder
(Cluster D: delusional, desperate, disillusioned)
Diagnostic Criteria
A. A pervasive pattern of defensive behaviors and internalized traits in response to perceived romantic inequities, beginning by early adulthood and present in various contexts, as indicated four (or more) of the following:
- Learned defense mechanisms to avoid being seen as the "lowest common denominator" for short-term sexual partners.
- Internalized jadedness toward looks-matched suitors who fail to meet hypergamous standards.
- Impulsive flaunting of sexuality to compensate for perceived shortcomings or insecurities.
- Use of excessive temporary enhancements (e.g., makeup, deceptive clothing) to elevate perceived attractiveness.
- Sense of entitlement to unattainable romantic or social benefits.
- Chronic feelings of being trapped in a cycle of distressing male attention.
B. The pattern causes significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other areas of functioning such as interpersonal relationships.
C. The pattern is stable and of long duration, and its onset can be traced back at least to adolescence or early adulthood.
D. The pattern is not better explained by another mental disorder (e.g., narcissistic personality disorder).
Specifiers
- Mild/Moderate/Severe: Based on number of traits and impairment level.
- With hypergamous features: Emphasis on unrequited romantic expectations.
Approach them 7's, Gents! They're a lot easier to talk to and much more willing to be fun around and with you.
~VRX