I second Matty here. In my idealistic younger days, i played out every angle of "Act nice toward her, and she'll surely see how much better of an option you are than everyone else in the ocean of options she's immersed in, then she'll pick up the reins and start actively pursuing YOU!

I just coined a name for this: Passive-Possession. To the naive young idealist, this should TOTALLY WORK, especially given all the blatantly rotten and dysfunctional relationships to be seen everywhere.

Trouble is, this goes directly against sexual strategies that were functional and necessary back to our Simian roots, thus hardwired into brain functionalities that need eons to catch up to the changes wrought through tool use and technology development over the past historical blink of the evolutionary eye.

The actionable part of all this: female attraction solidly favors the suitors who pursue women actively and assertively, and this leaves relatively passive Nice Guy types in the dust of the dating game.

Thus, make a point of decisively ASKING OUT a woman you're interested in! You'll eliminate dead ends quickly and decisively, but you'll never "ruin" a legitimate open opportunity by "pushing the matter. "

Clumsy and ineffective METHODS of asking do exist, but make a different matter entirely.

I've had a few lesbian friends. Lesbians are women after all, and not even they are immune to the biological clock. When you're sitting and talking with a lesbian one-on-one, you'll come to find out that even though they like women, when it comes to children, they would very much prefer to have a man.

Well, this one has an easy answer.

ASK HER.

Something like this.... be in a conversation with her...... and then throw in "Hey, HotGirl...... tell me..... do you have a boyfriend? .... or a girlfriend?"

If she's interested in you, you'll get an answer that will allow some way to fit in with her life.

If she isn't interested in you, it doesn't matter what she says.

Don't overthink this one, just ask.

But understand that this isn't the best play. This is 80% of the best play. The best play is Escalate And Find Out..... basically try and have sex with her, and get your answer along the way. Now I understand you want more information before you run all that, and that's fine. But the best play to get maximum results is to try for sex and not try for information.

There's a tonne of reasons for this, including:

• Answering makes her feel vulnerable and she might not like that
• The literal answer might be somewhat more negotiable than she is prepared to say (eg "I'm seeing a girl but I want a boyfriend" - she won't say that, but it might be true)
• Escalating skillfully with zero information makes you look more attractive.

But.... if you don't want to do that..... ask.