Hello everyone,I'll be quick here. For shithole country reasons, my financial situation has been difficult for a few years, i've struggled with unemployment for a while now, but I'm coming out of it this year with a focus on career and not just jobs. Unemployment and low money is not the issue right now, it is only a factor to take into account when gaming and approaching women here, and I am DONE being off the market.
Setting: Most girls here are broke too, unemployed and always looking for a provider guy, particulary on dating apps, There is polarization where guys are either low income or high income, almost no middle class which is where I'm at.
I go out, see guys aged 20-40 and they're all getting laid, they all have a normal love life, not a lot of marriage going around. I am half-broke,I have money to date and get laid, my basic needs are covered, and I am starting my job search as an english teacher in about a week after I get my certificate, so i'm optimistic about finally getting a stable income and a job. I won't reveal how long I've been without pussy, but Vermillion and his story comes to mind, i know it can be done.
I know many of you experienced guys have been through rough economic situations and have still managed to have plates and get laid, so here's the main question: How do i integrate conversation about my situation into gaming without scaring them off?
It has happened countless times where I'm having a fun chat,interest is growing, and the question comes along: "What do you do? What's your job?" And i'm guessing this is where I am failing, cause I have been saying stuff like "I'm finishing some studies to start this new job" "I'm coming out of unemployment in a few weeks" and stuff like that. No matter how I put it, that is the killswitch. They can be 21 year old girls looking for fun or 45 year old good looking women looking for a partner, but once they ask that and I reply I get ghosted. (most of these women are broke ass hotties or proud hard working kinda feminists,many girls asking for some kind of direct money transfer has been very common, even before a first date or even giving their number...)
So how did you guys talk about this stuff when getting your plates? Where am I failing? It has happened so much I just can't put my finger on it. Bitch if you just wanna fuck why are you vetting me like you're looking for the father of your children?
TO ANSWER MY OWN QUESTION: I had success when living abroad, i know I live in a very dysfunctional place, I am open to the idea that I'm not the problem here. So my answer would be to get the money first and then find the girl, simple,basic and where I'm going anyways. I'm very horny, my libido is very healthy and I know It can be done, I wouldn't be even trying if i thought otherwise.
superhitops 1d ago
Who's paying your bills? How can you afford living? Single mamas wants man that can bail them out. Old woman wants man that can pay for themselves. Good woman will vet good man, which at least show some effort. Thus, you need at the very least show effort.
However... if you want a hack, say you are an artist, or poet, or some misunderstood guy whose art is not understood. Or get into some charity pro-bono and be an activist. It may get you some rich liberal woman.
Hypergamy is not always money, granted, but man, find a way of living. Get yourself to work. Drive uber. Write poems and recite them on youtube. Whatever.
MrSupreme 1d ago
I'm getting there,with the job and stuff,i am, I'm also being impatient because its been a while. I'm not gonna lie and say I'm an artist, i mean I can cook and that all the art i can do.Thanks.
Musicgoon78 3 16h ago
I want to riff off of this as an idea for you. When you don't have money women will stick around for one big reason: they see potential. Wether you can eventually support them or even just change the way they perceive the world, they will cling to that.
AbusiveFather1 1d ago
You need to fabricate a story and then feed it to girls that are looking for fun. Something they can roll with to rationalise fucking you: a good excuse as to why you are not rich (yet). Maybe you’re not one of those 9-5 drones and plan to start your own company, maybe you just got out of the military or came home from a voyage to other countries. Obviously you need to max your appearance and game/charisma, enough to compensate for money and status. Game them so well that your financial situation is the last thing on their mind, and they’re just enjoying the moment too much to care.
I’d say your target audience is college girls - I’m assuming that they’re financially supported by their parents or the government in your country as well, so they don’t worry about money yet.
And then you need to figure out where to fuck them. As long as you have a private room you’re good. If you’re living with family then just bring the whores over at night, fuck them, and then take them back home. Unless the whores’ place is available, which it sometimes isn’t due to roommates or if they’re living with family too. Fucking in the car isn’t really optimal in my opinion but you can try. If you don’t have a car, then you’ll have to improvise and really research local spots that will be private when you require them (maybe the park at night).
Also, alcohol is your friend here. It makes women less calculated and easier to give in to their own natural impulses; by the way that’s the reason for a lot of sexual assault cases - buyers remorse, or shifting the blame for their choices and desires on to other people (so don’t get in trouble). But if you’re in a Muslim country, alcohol isn’t really an option, and you probably shouldn’t be trying to fuck out of wedlock there.
MrSupreme 23h ago
Great idea about fabricating a story, i don't feel confortable with lying,even small lies, but I can try to lead the conversation towards other subjects and make truth a bit more pretty,and omit certain details.
On the logistics side,i live with my family and I have my own room which i have used before to bring girls (i even lived here with my ex a decade ago). I'm also a fan of public sex,but it would take some more comfort for that, not a firtst sex thing.
Drinks are usually a few beers,its not a muslim country(related to Cuba actually) but I'd rather not drink much on dates.
I'll think about the convo and my own story for sure.Thanls mate!
AbusiveFather1 23h ago
see this is where women have an edge on you. women don't leave the house without lying (makeup, heels, etc). women are also ruthless and viciously pragmatic. if you're not going to make up a fun story and just decide to be honest about your poor financial situation, they will destroy you. even the "nicest" and most altruistic woman: at best she will pity you. to her, there must be an obvious end in sight to your problems (if she's going to discover them at all), and you must at least appear to have an elaborate plan to make your life not just better, but great (she can't settle for just "good" or average).
MrSupreme 22h ago
Yeah I know they lie, big time, as a divorced man i know. I feel you, i'm gonna embelllish my speech a bit then, just to give the info they need to hear. I don't feel like being completely honest about myself anyways, if they wanna know something at least ask in person.
I kind of made this post too late, because I'm coming out of my rut, but the knowledge is appreciated anyways.
Musicgoon78 3 9h ago
Holy hell bro. You're the next runner up for pessimist of the year. Do you not see how you're playing defense instead of simply keeping your own strong frame and making yourself the prize? You're bullshitting women, jumping through hoops, gaming women supported by parents,getting them liquored up so you can fuck them in a park.....
And then you wait around for them to destroy you? For fucks sake man! This is a massive waste of time and disingenuous. There's a difference between genuine attraction and just duping a woman to get laid....
adam-l Moderator 1d ago
From your post I reckon you might even be priming them to ask about your job/income. As AbusiveFather1 wrote, have a story ready, just in case, but forget it and don't expect to do this kind of discussion. Get it out of your mind. You're there to have fun, it's weird for the discussion to even get there, that's the vibe you should be aiming for. Even if women are actively looking for a provider in your country. Even golddiggers don't say no to being swept off their feet by a charming stranger.
MrSupreme 23h ago
I get it, hadn't thought of it that way,something in me must be telling them to ask for it, maybe I look rich lol.
I haven't gamed in a while so I gotta get out there, and lead conversations.
AbusiveFather1 23h ago
this
First-light 1 20h ago
As others have noted women buy into hopes and ambitions. They hope you will make their life better, so lead with that. Create that.
You do need to be realistic not a blag artist with a sack load of fake stories or you will be found out sooner or later but you can simply refuse to believe there is any problem with you being between jobs, its all part of your plan, you have enough money so no real worries, you are enjoying the leisure and the options.
It never fails to amaze me how many broke guys seduce women and then ask them for money. It won't work on 80 to 90% of women but it will work on some who are more innocent or more idealistic, particularly if they come for a reasonably well off background and have only previously had good interactions with men. Every middle class family knows some friend who was "taken in by a rogue". A confident guy who is not worried about his poverty does not worry them much because they don't know what real need is and all their experience is good. You don't even want their money, just a ride on their tits and they will want that too when they know what a high value guy you are just waiting to break through, so its all happy.
BeeSerious9 19h ago
nise write up
MrSupreme 19h ago
I agree that they buy into hopes and ambitions, but I was thinking it kind of goes against the RP phrase that says "women are waiting at the finish line" too. I've been at the top of my game and sure enough there was attention and pussy there, not so much now.
I mean I've been confident about it,I believe in manifesting and in a couple exchanges i actually talked about my future plans just to let her know I do have a ambition and purpose. I took that phrase seriously and I'm seeing lt myself,there has been no exception for me to believe otherwise. Still fucking weird that they ask this stuff before a first date.
Of course,i understand that I'm 36 and they're expecting guys my age to have a very solid and stable foundation. They're looking for the 5% of guys in me, still a mystery why I would be giving those vibes.
superhitops 3h ago
No, they don't. There wouldn't be that much woman asking where the good man are if that was really true. You are too bluepilled to even get the advice you have been getting.
You are still too fixated in finding woman. That most likely brought you here. Don't do that. Live well without woman.
Ow, you can't? Does it become pointless? See, that is the problem.
You are trying to find reason in woman. Sidebar is there for you. Go find a life first.
No-Stress-Cat 17h ago
"Let's just say I work for the government. If I told you any more than that, I'd have to kill you."
Teacher works for the government, so not a lie.
Musicgoon78 3 16h ago
Great question,
Here's my response. After divorce I was homeless, overweight and jobless for a while. Frame is everything! Let me repeat that, frame is everything.
Now, I never lied about my situation. Call it lazy, but I didn't give a fuck who knew and I didn't want to have to remember my bullshit.
Now here's the truth. If it's not a big deal to you, it's not going to be a big deal to people around you. I was celebrating bro. After years of torture and imprisonment, I was finally free. I wasn't thinking about what I didn't have, I was riding the wave of possibility. It was like looking at the world through the eyes of a child with the potential of a fully capable man. I was positive, honest, enthusiastic, grateful, playful and filled with hope.
I found things to do that didn't cost anything. If I couldn't afford something I would say so and offer an alternative. I fucked women like it was my last day on the planet.
I was fun to be around and positive. I showed these women resilience with a touch of class. In return for honesty and positivity, women would give me a place to stay, I got free meals out, I got taken to some fantastic shows and trips and I even got gifts. I didn't ask them for anything (well maybe I asked them to sit on my face...)and they would volunteer their money and resources.
I made myself the prize. If you want money to be your problem it definitely can be. But if you don't care you'll be vastly successful. Every mindless drone and beta faggot is negative. Optimism and enthusiasm are refreshing and stand out.
My suggestion is don't larp. Realize you have potential and you have time and attention to give. That's what we trade for money. Lying will eventually bite you in the ass and make you look completely weak.
MrSupreme 14h ago
I've no idea how to make que quote boxes so I'll use quotation marks intead:
"""""Here's my response. After divorce I was homeless, overweight and jobless for a while. Frame is everything! Let me repeat that, frame is everything.
Now, I never lied about my situation. Call it lazy, but I didn't give a fuck who knew and I didn't want to have to remember my bullshit. """"
Same here after my divorce a while back, got to taste freedom and being single after almost a decade. I think where I have failed is that i should have cared more about who knows about my joblessness because it seems to be a serious thing to the women i've met.
""""""""""I was riding the wave of possibility. It was like looking at the world through the eyes of a child with the potential of a fully capable man. I was positive, honest, enthusiastic, grateful, playful and filled with hope. """"""""""""""""""""
Hit the nail on the head with that one. I was pessimistic and low self esteem enough when married.Now I see no point at all in focusing on the negatives when there's still chances to get some, it is a waste of time.
""""""""""""" Every mindless drone and beta faggot is negative. Optimism and enthusiasm are refreshing and stand out
My suggestion is don't larp. Realize you have potential and you have time and attention to give. That's what we trade for money. Lying will eventually bite you in the ass and make you look completely weak. """""""""""""""""""
I'm truly trying to make the best version of me right now,recently found a group of young people to hang out with (they're between 19-23 ,im 36 lol), just finished making my resume and if dating apps sluts won't budge then I have to do more approaching in the streets.
And money has been a struggle for a few years, I've learned some detachment and appreciating free stuff like a sunset but I have to be selfish now, i want to fuck and I want money, get tattoos and travel around.
Thanks dude!