First off I’ll say that you should feel good about yourself for even being in this situation. Most 25 year old guys are not at a level where they can party all night with European models.

Based on your post it seems like the vibe turned when you became too lovey-dovey as you said. As other commenters said, you put her on a big pedestal, which she is completely used to. This not only gives her the ick (she already has HUGE self esteem based on your description), but it also shows her that she can wrap you around her finger. When you put a woman like this on a pedestal, she doesn’t feel special, she just now feels like you aren’t special.

She knows that she can call you tomorrow, or next week, or next month, and you will immediately be down to fck. She knows she “has you.” She does not feel any dread that if she doesn’t hook up with you, someone else will.

Unfortunately due to the power imbalance here (you aren’t a famous DJ yet like other guys she hooks up with) it’s really easy to get oneitis over chicks like this.

The credit card, the phone dying, these are totally insignificant to the bigger picture which is that you felt like she was the prize, that you weren’t the prize. Unfortunately with women like this the only way to really nail it is if you are the most socially dominant person in the room. As you said she’s used to DJ’s and all sorts of wealthy and popular people, so unless you are at that level in your career the only way to make up for this is to be almost obnoxiously socially dominant with a master of hot&cold game. A great example of this is Jon Zherka.

Zherka is a master of hot and cold game. Because we live in a. Censored society most of his stuff is deleted but you can probably find old videos of him doing game. If you ever find yourself complementing a girl too much you can see what he does and immediately switch to cold and dismissive, teasing her etc.

It sucks but chicks like this who are models don’t really give a fuck about “connecting” with you, that is ancillary. She cares about connecting with you until the actor or DJ with a $5 million penthouse overlooking the city invites her over for a party to do cocaine. Because she’s a European model she has access to those types of things whereas regular girls do not.

To sum all that up: too loveydovey without being cold&dismissive as a contrast, put her on a pedestal, not socially dominant enough to make her think that she’s “missing out” by not hooking up with you in that moment

It's always hard to tell how you come across when intoxicated. If I had to guess you were friend zoned earlier in the night than you thought and she legitimately was taking you back to charge your phone. Knowing she had a roommate there it is a quasi-public space for her and not such a big deal to invite you back. You may also have been too desperate, sometimes you strike out just by virtue of trying too hard for too long and would be better off leaving her wanting more. Being a mid tier normie and fucked up enough not to remember parts of the night, I doubt she was creaming for you at any point in the evening and whatever escalation took place seemed to be to placate you rather than her really feeling it.

just some assumptions obviously, who knows. Maybe she had to take a dump and didn't want sex anymore

From the first few paragraphs

• No focus on push-pull dynamic
• Major pedestalizing making her the prize
• Couldnt tell when to cut your losses and stop trying like a bloop faggot

Well done in trying and for writing a FR.

You were in a good mood and charismatic from the drugs. Sadly that only goes so far when you dont get women. Back to the sidebar, this is basics.

This is a good field report! You gave the details needed, and tried to analyze it yourself rather than just asking what went wrong. Here are my 2 cents:

First, and biggest deal: when your interaction is based on alcohol / drugs / some form of social lubrication, you're on a clock to get things done before the high is gone. This happens to me too. I don't take any drugs, but alcohol is my social lubricant. After a few drinks I'm usually flirting, dancing, and having a great vibe going. More importantly, so are the women. I don't get black-out drunk to where I don't remember what happened, and I deliberately stay away from the sloppy drunk women, and go for the ones who are just inebriated and having a good time.

But regardless, you have to understand that much of your "connection" is due to the alcohol / drugs on both sides, and when you two sober up, oftentimes one or both of you decide you're no longer interested. It's not just the connection. No one wants to fuck when they've got a headache from a developing hangover, or feel like throwing up, or coming down from MDMA or cocaine or whatever. Which is why waiting too long and letting the high wear off almost guarantees that nothing will happen.

Note that this isn't advice to have sex with a blackout drunk woman who can't make decisions. Not unless you enjoy spending time in prison for rape. It means that there's a time period when both of you are still enjoying the high but still able to make proper decisions, and that's the time to escalate, before the downer of coming off that high turns everyone off.

What I usually do, is accelerate the timeline somewhat. Rather than spend all night talking, escalate a little more quickly, isolate more quickly, and get home when both of you are still in a good mood. Next, if you want to take it a little slower at home and build comfort, I'll offer some wine or some other drink and maybe we'll have a glass or two. Again, not to get her drunk, but to prolong and slow the descent back to being totally sober and hung over.

So again, the point is that if you're depending on drugs and alcohol, you need to move before that stuff wears off, and/or prolong the high or slow the descent, all things to give you more time before the inevitable withdrawal kicks in and everyone just wants to go home and sleep.

Regarding your cell phone dying and your credit card not working, I actually don't think this hurt you too much. Sounds like you already established a connection, and everyone knows this stuff can happen, so it sounds like she took it in stride and paid so that you two could keep going. Obviously it would have been better if it didn't happen, but I don't think it was too big a deal (as it might have been if it happened earlier).

The roommate thing, especially being her sister, is a big deal. You had no way of knowing it, but this is why you should try to control the setting. I know some guys who prefer taking a girl to her place so that she doesn't know where the guy lives, but really, if you're dating girls who might set your house on fire, you've got bigger problems :-) Assuming your girl isn't [too] crazy, I usually bring them back to my place because then I can control the setting and still lead the interaction. Sometimes a woman insists on going back to her place, so it doesn't always happen, but try as much as possible to take her back to your place rather than to hers.

I think where it went south wasn't when your phone died. It was when she started sobering up. It wasn't about dynamics which still sound fine from how you describe it. And she decided nothing was going to happen that night, and genuinely meant to just let you charge your phone at her place, and maybe talk for a bit. Why? Because she knows she's living with her sister. It's one thing to bring your longstanding boyfriend back, but no sister is going to approve of a one night stand with a rando, and unlike regular roommates, you can't get rid of family even if they move out. So she had already decided nothing was going to happen.

Third point is your followup. The chances of a connection that started in a drunk, dark night actually remaining in the bright light of [a sober] day are always low. Not that it never happens, but you're far more likely to find an LTR through day game or social networks. This is why we always tell guys that getting numbers in a club doesn't mean anything. You have to close that night. the chances of her returning your texts the next day are low no matter how good the alcohol made both of you feel last night.

So don't beat yourself up about nothing happening. Knowing this, if you wish to still at least give it a chance, the goal is to commit to another meetup quick. Wait until the hangover goes away, which means don't text in the morning. Last thing you want is to serve as her reminder of why she never wants to drink again as her head is pounding and she's wearing sunglasses to keep the sun from burning her eyes. Wait at least until the afternoon, or better yet early evening, when the hangover is going away, she's had some sleep, and hopefully she's remembering the good times from the previous night. Or else the next day. Basically wait until you have a fighting chance that she's in a receptive mood.

Then, text her with a specific time and place. If she's anything like me, after a drunken night out, the last thing I want to do is get drunk again (usually takes me at least a week before I even feel like touching alcohol again :-). So don't propose meeting at a bar. Even if you're proposing it for the next weekend, she won't be in the mood to even think about a bar again, so she'll just leave you on read, then forget about you when Friday comes along and she's ready to go out again.

Instead, propose something lowkey, like maybe a walk in a park, or a laid back dinner. Something that sounds good when you're still a little hung over and tired. Goal is to propose something that she would enjoy in her post-hungover state so as to maximize the chance that she says yes. This also reassures her that you're not just a club douchebag or an alcoholic who only spends times at bars. She's seen your drunk side. Now show her that's not all there is to you.

At that point you wait and see. If she wants to see you again, she'll get back to you. If not, you move on. Maybe you'll see her again at a local bar and reconnect. Or not.

Overall, I wouldn't beat yourself up too much. You did good in even approaching and hanging out with this girl all night when most guys didn't even have the guts to try. Keep doing that and eventually you'll make a real connection. Trying to turn a club / drunk / high connection into something lasting is always a low chance, even with the advice I gave above, so don't worry too much about it.

She is used to being hit on and has options.

She had a nice evening and probably doesn't think any more about it than that. There are a number of possible reasons why the trail went cold. Some could be you -48hrs is a long wait if you are used to attention from quality guys and the guy is good enough but not stand out- but most would be her. She has options and will be hit on plenty, may have a main guy who has come back into orbit, may be tired of men and casual hook ups and may just think -well it wasn't stand out and he wasn't that keen.

Its a bit like an athlete wondering why he didn't clear the bar or make a selection time. He can analyse it till the cows come home but in the end he didn't bring quite enough. However, he didn't really do anything really wrong either. He just needed one second more speed or 1/2 an inch more height. He is not seeing all the speed he did have that got him onto contention or all the height he did jump. Had he done everything perfect maybe he would have made the standard today but that is not really the point. You want to be able to make the standard on a bad day to be a contender at that standard or when you compete at that level you are an also ran at best. You have seen you are nearly there. No real loss this time. You will get there.

Hang on a second, let's remember that she let you get in an uber and go back to her house. Women don't just let anyone come back to the place they sleep.

So where do you think you really messed up? Coming down from MDMA might have messed up your interpretation of the situation. Maybe you started getting in your own head after she had to pay. It's not that big a deal bro, if anything it is an excuse to see her again so you can pay her back.