I want to know the most ideal way to get a chick to answer what their body count is (as honest as possible), if considering her for LTR.
- Should you downplay it like u don’t care and then asses / ghost accordingly
- At what point would you ask the question and how would u ask it
And if she answers the question is it still valid to keep yours anonymous, ie. “I don’t kiss and tell” etc,
how to handle this dilemma and get this intel on her in the best way possible ?
Problematic_Browser 1 2w ago
Lol you don't.
No woman will tell the truth about this. Ever.
The best way is to present yourself as nonjudgmental. And when I say that, you cannot pass external judgment of any woman's sexual history. Ever. Even an offhand comment will stick in her brain that she shouldn't disclose it.
Eventually, she'll tell on herself through her actions, her associations, etc.
mattyanon Admin 1mo ago
best way is to be super low judgmental and gradually let the trickle truth trickle out.
Watch for weasely answers...... eg...... "I've only had 3 boyfriends" (doesn't mention 50 one night stands and 20 fuck buddies)....... "I've never had a one night stand" ...... (doesn't mention 20 fuck buddies or the one night stands that were during the day), etc. etc.
A funny response is "Sure, and how many more that didn't count?"....... because the answer will not include all the ones that she manages to pretend "don't count".
I would advise against "check her out before a LTR". Women know you do this and they lie, lie, lie.
Better is to do your best to understand everyone in your life, women especially....... and pick your LTR's from the suitable. This is very different from vetting which is generally obvious to women and they know how to manouvre around men to get what they want, which is why so many men still get married.
Don't say this if you want her to be honest about HER experiences.
adventurousman79 4w ago
Thanks, but what would u say if she asks you ?
Problematic_Browser 1 2w ago
My approach, and this may not work for you because you're not a JP-8 fueled muscle daddy, is that I go full nuclear.
My current girlfriend knows about EVERY bitch I've ever fucked, that I still see them out and about, still talk to them, etc.
I just tell her "I'm not fucking them now, so why does it matter?" It gives her the hard choice of accepting that or deciding that it's a deal breaker and adding herself to the list of "women I'm not fucking anymore". She knows that if she takes the latter option, it will just end with her single and me balls deep in one of my former buttholes.
mattyanon Admin 4w ago
talk honestly and openly if you want her to do the same
redhawkes 2 1mo ago
Already answered here.
Basically, be non judgemental and involve alcohol. Bitches are retarded and like to yapp a lot. Don't play it straight, if she asks, tell her "no sex till marriage" or "today only 3"
Musicgoon78 2 1mo ago
If you need to know, you can't handle the answer.
If you are sexually open and adventurous, a woman will tell you everything and let you do whatever you want to her. It all about making her feel safe with her honesty. Here's the rub: the truth is a kick in the nuts. Every - single - time.....
You're going to hear shit you don't like. You're going to do mental gymnastics to navigate the truth. Make sure you're strong enough to handle it. It's not pretty.
adventurousman79 4w ago
Yea lol but I think it’s still better knowing it will be bad but there’s a point that’s beyond recovery
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1mo ago
You'll never know. Never.
Even if she tells the truth from the outset (HAHAHAHA!!!), you'll never know that it's the truth.
Women can get sex incredibly easily, and can rack up a huge N-count by age 20, even if every dick touched was within a committed relationship.
Virtually every woman you get with will have a higher N-count than you, because they start younger and have easier access to sex.
Here's what matters: her actions. How does she treat you? As long as you're happy, the relationship can continue. The second she starts withholding sex or becoming a net negative in your life instead of a net positive, you can just end it as long as you didn't get married.
You're not making a relationship your goal, are you? Relationships are the woman's problem. You focus on being fuckable and getting sex. Make her earn anything past sex. Have you read the sidebar?
Heh, good luck with that. If she tells you hers (even if she hamsters away dozens of dicks as "doesn't count, tee-hee!"), and you reply with bullshit like that, she's going to feel betrayed.
If she asks first, by all means give her a reply like that.
But if you cajole a number out of her, and evade like that when she asks yours, don't be surprised when she ends things.
Like every other respondent said: if you really want to know, just listen and let her talk. She'll spill her guts websites eventually, and for many different reasons. She might think it makes her more appealing. She might be trying to evoke retroactive jealousy in you. You're just better off not worrying about it, especially if you're not getting married (and you're not, right?).
No-Stress-Cat 1mo ago
The question is, if you're thinking about agreeing to an LTR with her, does it really matter what her body count is?
If you have to think about it, is she worth being in an LTR with? You'll never know what her exact body count is.
Women have two types of body counts: Absolute Virgin and Raging Slut. There is no in-between. That's all you really need to know.
First-light 4w ago
Don't expect an honest sounding answer unless you are going to give one. You can always lie. She can too.
You will never know but probing questions will almost certainly lead to a lie she has to double down on.
Mofreer 4w ago
If you're fixated on knowing her body count and sexual history, it means you're more invested in her than she is in you. Women count emotionally, not just physically. That "one-night stand" she had? If she talked to the guy on Tinder beforehand, it doesn't count. The guy she slept with on vacation and never saw again? In her mind, he doesn’t count. The list goes on.
Digging into her past is a losing game. If she senses scrutiny, it signals insecurity on your part—and that’s a bad look. Instead of obsessing over her history, focus on how she bonds with you. Was she clingy after sex? Women with lower body counts hold onto the men they sleep with because they’re subconsciously aware that frequent casual sex weakens their ability to pair bond.
If you’re determined to know her body count, the only way is to show your own experience. But this backfires. She sees it as bragging, which comes off as insecure or dishonest. If she believes you, she weaponizes that information later when the relationship turns serious.
Drop the topic. Focus on building a life so fulfilling these thoughts don’t cross your mind. The less you care about her past, the more power you hold in the dynamic.
adventurousman79 4w ago
True the clingyness after sex is a good point