I’ve had this happen. It’s a recent trend (past 2-3 years). I have a few theories. He might have said something weird or presented himself in such a way, that although fine in the moment, she ruminated on it later. Like he could have gotten too invested emotionally, the girl could sense it the chick just wanted something casual, and she backed out
I find it serendipitous that I found this post after my friend just gave me a field report on his date Saturday night. He was asking me possibly what could have went wrong because he says he did everything right with the flirting, the touching, the kissing was all there on his date, yet he went home alone to goon and she went radio silent. I told him it happens to all of us and a guy with abundance mentality wouldn't give a fuck so you shouldn't either.
But I am interested from a RP theoretical prospective on why this happens. What is that subconscious evolutionary reason or conscious reason why women do this. As for my buddy, I told him I think it's because of social status and her reputation. They work for the same place but in different departments and she is a higher rank. I told him that maybe she doesnt want it getting out that she fucked someone junior in rank to her.
Here’s a hypothesis: the concept of “alpha behavior” is somewhat malleable, and differs a bit from culture to culture. But one constant is, all alphas within a culture behave generally the same
I’m trying to think of a specific example, but maybe you get the idea without needing it.
Here’s something to think about: has this girl ever fucked a guy without first having a “polite dinner date” - the answer is probably yes. Actually, the answer is probably that most of her “we fucked within hours of meeting” stories do not involve a “date”
If that’s true, then taking her on a date is not “behaving the way alphas behave” in her experience, and that means that subconsciously, she already has you in some other category. “He’s a nice guy” she might be thinking.
It’s easy to think, when you meet a girl, “I’m gonna treat her better than other guys have” - but that might be a trap. She’s probably for the streets, which means she has extensive experience with alphas. If you don’t behave like an alpha (whatever that is, in her experience) then her hindbrain is telling her, “he’s not one”
This type of thing can happen for lots of reasons.
1) you didn't escalate enough and she thinks you aren't hot for her, you aren't man enough for her
2) She's dating multiple guys of course and one of the other guys is in focus right now
you admin for your buddy, that they work for same company in different depts and she's above him. Well, Ya, that's hypergammy in play along with don't shit where you eat.
I dunno, that never happened to me. Maybe he just keeps getting foodies looking for a free meal? I quit dating Western women back in the 90s, shortly after high school. The juice wasn't worth the squeeze.
In SE Asia and Russia it was so straight-forward. No games. You just tell a chick you like her and ask if she wants to get with you. If she says yes you take her home and fuck. If you really like her you keep fucking her over and over again.
These Western women are just straight up immature. Like little kids. Acting all surprised when they realize men have dicks and want to put them inside them.
Another guy in the picture (better prospect, boyfriend, etc.)
Had a genuinely great time but she knows you're not compatible or what she's looking for, but still had genuine fun. Realized there was too much pressure to keep going because dates often imply relationship trajectory.
No "spark". You can have an amazing date, that is fun, but if she doesn't have tingles it doesn't matter. If the vibe isn't conductive to sex, they can lose interest because they expect men who are crazy about them or she's crazy about to result in irresistible sex and that didn't happen.
Perfect is boring. Perfect has no tension. The guy thinks the date was perfect, and she left feeling like there was zero challenge. Perfect is terrible.
Perfect date
We spent hours chatting, flirting, and ended the night with some passionate kisses
Basically OP had a hot iron, probably could have definitely escalated much sooner, and if she was willing to passionately kiss at the end, they could have done this midway and he could have pulled. Never sit there "chatting" for hours whatever that means. And never "flirt" for hours.
This girl was probably dripping and OP basically teased her. I would also heavily bet his "chatting" topics and responses were shooting him the foot. Probably answered or god forbid asked her what she was looking for instead of leading. Etc.
His flirting probably also was not what he thought it was. You don't sit and chat there for hours as a dude when the vibe is allegedly good and not make a move to pull or kiss. To him this was a perfect date, to her her expectations were probably dashed and crushed
Many women have been on first dates where they were so into a guy they just let the night progress how he wished, had hot sex that night, had that experience stamped into their minds, and then were involved with that guy for months in what was probably a constant challenge because he didn't care enough about her.
Women go on "dates" and they aren't wow'd like the previous men who have taken them in "dates" especially "dates that had irresistible "spark" sex, she is going to leave a no pull date as still looking for that "spark"
Dates are a horrible idea for men unless you have to go on one. If you need to go on one because you don't have the necessary rapport or initial tension for her to have sex with you, then you need to ensure you heat up that iron as much as you can on it and strike and make some sparks fly and then use your dick like a man.
Edit: some times a woman (for bullet reason #2) had an amazing time but doesn't want to string you along if she thinks you want a relationship and she wasn't seeing you as long term. In this case it's better to YOLO casual. Yet another reason it is a man's job to acquire sex and a woman's job to secure commitment. There are plenty of women who will fuck you after a great date but who won't continue to date you because you're not their envisioned boyfriend. Hence you should not give needy and committed vibes and spend the whole date trying to generate "sparks" tingles instead, try to fuck if it's possible, but make house plans next time if it's not.
A) like Vermy said: it probably didn't go as great as the dude thought.
B) most women, if you don't go for sex as fast as possible, they assume you're either not that into them, that you're gay, or that there aren't any "sparks"
C) there are myriad reasons it may have actually gone great and she just lost interest or doesn't want to continue. Many of those possibilities have been enumerated by others already.
pragmatically speaking, it doesn't pay to care, because you will never know the real reason.
The possibilities are too many, the woman isn't going to tell you the truth if you get the chance to ask her, and it's a strong possibility that she doesn't even know why herself beyond a generic, vague "I'm not feeling it".
Id argue perfect dates without sex or worse than dates that had some obstacles. Unless she's dying to fuck you, an unideal date can be blamed on other factors and as long as it was good enough, a woman might give it another shot. If it was perfect and she didn't feel anything, she has no choice but to conclude you're not the right guy
My wife is a Soviet woman so she's nothing like either western women or even modern EE women. She grew up with hardships so they didn't faze her and she could even be amused by it. I am amused by the saying "Hard times create weak men" when I think this saying more applies to women. American farm girls I knew back 40 years ago also seemed to have a pragmatic outlook.
@Vermillion-RX@whytehorse2021 I have another summary post I'm readying of a 51 yo divorcee who exemplifies the burnout of modern western women whom I would describe as ambivalent entitlement: They enjoy being courted and important but largely don't "need" sex or even a "relationship" hence their "strong, independent" catch-phrase. This one described herself as drooling over a 6'4" guy and a 2nd base makeout in the parking lot but also said she doesn't feel "chemistry". I don't think she was posturing.
This makes me wonder whether she, and many such women, simply don't "feel" anything for men at all similar to some heroin junkie who can barely get high with a near fatal dose.
It's interesting, back to my wife, in that she is sort of cat-like in how she expresses affection. She doesn't make grand gestures of emotional affection including to her daughter most of the time and she doesn't need them herself, but she does clearly look out for the two of us and express concern. Perhaps it's part of her Soviet era stoicism?
So how I think this applies to OP may be this: When the "chemistry" was flowing, like eating perfect food, she enjoyed it but the moment it was over and she got home, she didn't "feel" anything at that moment. Since so many fo these women want to be "led", they lack the ability to even imagine or remember emotions with accuracy or even describe them. (It doesn't help that they project this lack of self-awareness on us.)
"I was so hungry I could eat a horse". We can say that and convey the meaning, but perhaps this woman simply lacks the imagination and inner voice/emotional intelligence to understand that she "felt" something for a reason and then to make a decision to continue it.
I honestly worried that my wife could give my child an eating disorder as she insisted that i should put food in front of my daughter without asking my daughter what she wants. "She doesn't know what she wants so just put everything in front of her". This is why maybe some women can't figure out how to order from a menu? I said my daughter should get the food she asks for, eat the food she commits to, and come back later and get more if she wants.
So imagine this scenario: You go out to dinner hungry and you enjoyed it. You get a call the next day from the restaurant if you'd like to go again and you say: "I don't know, I don't feel hungry right now so there's no chemistry".
Like the low-IQ test for inmates who can't answer the question: "if you didn't eat breakfast this morning, how would you feel?" and they answer: "But I ate breakfast."
Perhaps most of these women are "damaged goods" so to speak.
Doh! I have this problem (it's genetic) of mixing up names and words at times, even after a single re-read.
Very well, "good times create weak men". Consider: I believe that wealthy families do produce stronger men in the sense that these men are statistically taller and better educated and tend to be more successful. Education and attention are not wasted on young men but rather essential for their development and a healthy society.
Then... women's equality emerged and all these resources were halved along with wages while the cost of living rose. That really worked out swell as the hypergamous women increased demands while the resources for making the men they increasingly desired dried up.
pragmatically speaking, it doesn't pay to care, because you will never know the real reason.
The real reason was that he was not 6'7" with 30" arms and a overtly massive bulge that barely fit in the driver's seat of his Lambo. It's in the sidebar bro do you even lift?
I'd say escalation and sexual tension isn't that important. It's more about hypergamy and where she perceives you to be in her line-up.
I've had lukewarm dates with little kino, maybe a little kiss, but the girl would keep chasing because I didn't really care about the 2nd date.
Not saying to skip kino and sexual tension but there are definitely cases where it's not necessary for them to start chasing you. Or it's just how Asian girls are. But like the hypothetical question that was posted here a while ago - ask yourself "Would she do that to Chris Hemsworth?"
So in short, be outcome independent and focus on you having fun. The rest is out of your control and there's no point wondering what you could have done to get laid. Either it happens or it doesn't. On to the next
I'd say escalation and sexual tension isn't that important. It's more about hypergamy and where she perceives you to be in her line-up.
Escalation is vital because it is both attractive AND it tells you were you are in her line up. If you escalate and she fucks you, good chance you feature pretty highly.
So in short, be outcome independent and focus on you having fun. The rest is out of your control and there's no point wondering what you could have done to get laid. Either it happens or it doesn't. On to the next
The problem here is that this is what the original poster is doing. He is going on dates and having fun. But they always go nowhwere, so he is looking for actionable tips and/or insights so he can get more results.
The facts you don’t wanna hear from a certified man whore:
First mistake: taking a girl u haven’t even fucked out for a date. In today’s age you don’t treat women like ladies first. Unlike our judicial system you should view women as guilty until proven innocent. Do not take some random chick on a date where you spend monies. If it’s some random hoe u met at a bar or off tinder and she’s being pretty resistant (if she wanted you she’d do everything to make herself available), it’s 99% likely already RIP. The more rare circumstance where the hesitance is genuine: your “date” should be extremely cheap (talking $10 and under per person - think coffee, slice of pizza, ice cream, etc. you should reserve actual dates for: after you’ve already clapped plural times and you have credible and rational reasons to believe she has potential for LTR. Not hamster spinning reasons.
More than likely date went well in your mind but not in hers. Esp considering you haven’t smashed and you took her on. A “date” this tells me you’re prob pretty unexperienced in women. I’m ur age and my body count is approaching the big 2 hundo and I’ve had a few LTRs. If you’re not past 50 at your age (unless if you’ve had an LTR since hs n recently became single) you don’t get bitches. So what u thought went well did not.
3.”spent HOURS CHATTING… and ended the night with some PASSIONATE KISSES” = ur a fag. Sorry that might be mean but like ye bro you fumbled the bag beyond repair; women aren’t turned on by beta simps they want MEN who aren’t fuckin timid little pyssies.
For the .00001% chance I’m wrong like ya there’s prob some other dude in the pic that fucked it all up but nah I’m pretty firm in my conviction that based off ur word choices you’re a blue pilled simp. Welcome to redpill u got a lot to learning.
Im harsh but i say it w love i want all the dawgs to eat. Learn to swim and learn fast
"I've lost count of the number of times"..... so this is something that happens to this man a lot. I'll come back to that.
I'm going to try and work out what's not been said but is likely true:
The man is inviting the girl out for a fun date
Very good chance he's paying
He leads with "chatting"
He ends with "some passionate kisses". Some. SOME.
He is very low risk, his dates end well and he never has a woman outraged as his brazen sexual escalation
He doesn't instill any sense in the girl any sense that he is the prize to be won
He's coming at this from the point of view of her changing her mind, therefore he is blind to what's actually happening during the date.
I think this is a case where a girl is offered a fun and free night out with a nice guy who is not bad looking (but not great looking), he's clearly very nice and he's offering to pay.
He takes a super low risk approach for the girl: a fun time, talks to her a lot, listens to her, flirts with her, and pays.
There are a lot of women who will think "He's sort of OK looking, and I'm not that attracted, but he seems nice and it'll be a laugh. I'd really like to date a nice guy for once, I'm fed up of these assholes railing me and then dumping me. I want to be shown a good time, be courted, and date a nice guy!".
And they try. They really do try. She probably thinks she's doing him a favor by trying. He moves slowly so she's comfortable. End of the night she's tipsy and kisses him because well, that's what you do at the end of the night. He doesn't try for sex because HE IS A NICE GUY.
When pressing for a second date, it's clear that he'll want more than kissing: kissing happened the first time so nice time might be sex. She doesn't want to fuck him...... She thinks: "I mean he's not bad looking, but he's not exciting and clearly he doesn't have many options because of how nice he is being".
There's a good chance there is something subtle in his actions that tell her he doesn't normally get second dates.... She thinks: I wonder why not? What's wrong with him? Well, she doesn't want to be the one to find out. Those other women probably have a point, she thinks. "Thanks, I had a wonderful time, but I'm just not feeling it" she texts, hoping to avoid anything awkward in future.
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[deleted] 8mo ago
[--removed--]
MyBoyJob 8mo ago
I’ve had this happen. It’s a recent trend (past 2-3 years). I have a few theories. He might have said something weird or presented himself in such a way, that although fine in the moment, she ruminated on it later. Like he could have gotten too invested emotionally, the girl could sense it the chick just wanted something casual, and she backed out
Seagram7 9mo ago
I find it serendipitous that I found this post after my friend just gave me a field report on his date Saturday night. He was asking me possibly what could have went wrong because he says he did everything right with the flirting, the touching, the kissing was all there on his date, yet he went home alone to goon and she went radio silent. I told him it happens to all of us and a guy with abundance mentality wouldn't give a fuck so you shouldn't either.
But I am interested from a RP theoretical prospective on why this happens. What is that subconscious evolutionary reason or conscious reason why women do this. As for my buddy, I told him I think it's because of social status and her reputation. They work for the same place but in different departments and she is a higher rank. I told him that maybe she doesnt want it getting out that she fucked someone junior in rank to her.
orbilius 8mo ago
Here’s a hypothesis: the concept of “alpha behavior” is somewhat malleable, and differs a bit from culture to culture. But one constant is, all alphas within a culture behave generally the same
I’m trying to think of a specific example, but maybe you get the idea without needing it.
Here’s something to think about: has this girl ever fucked a guy without first having a “polite dinner date” - the answer is probably yes. Actually, the answer is probably that most of her “we fucked within hours of meeting” stories do not involve a “date”
If that’s true, then taking her on a date is not “behaving the way alphas behave” in her experience, and that means that subconsciously, she already has you in some other category. “He’s a nice guy” she might be thinking.
It’s easy to think, when you meet a girl, “I’m gonna treat her better than other guys have” - but that might be a trap. She’s probably for the streets, which means she has extensive experience with alphas. If you don’t behave like an alpha (whatever that is, in her experience) then her hindbrain is telling her, “he’s not one”
Intrepid_Place53900 1 9mo ago
This type of thing can happen for lots of reasons.
1) you didn't escalate enough and she thinks you aren't hot for her, you aren't man enough for her
2) She's dating multiple guys of course and one of the other guys is in focus right now
you admin for your buddy, that they work for same company in different depts and she's above him. Well, Ya, that's hypergammy in play along with don't shit where you eat.
whytehorse2021 9mo ago
I dunno, that never happened to me. Maybe he just keeps getting foodies looking for a free meal? I quit dating Western women back in the 90s, shortly after high school. The juice wasn't worth the squeeze.
In SE Asia and Russia it was so straight-forward. No games. You just tell a chick you like her and ask if she wants to get with you. If she says yes you take her home and fuck. If you really like her you keep fucking her over and over again.
These Western women are just straight up immature. Like little kids. Acting all surprised when they realize men have dicks and want to put them inside them.
AbusiveFather1 8mo ago
That’s exactly right. Modern american women are a joke and I feel sorry for Americans that grew up thinking these are normal intergender dynamics.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 9mo ago
Basically OP had a hot iron, probably could have definitely escalated much sooner, and if she was willing to passionately kiss at the end, they could have done this midway and he could have pulled. Never sit there "chatting" for hours whatever that means. And never "flirt" for hours.
This girl was probably dripping and OP basically teased her. I would also heavily bet his "chatting" topics and responses were shooting him the foot. Probably answered or god forbid asked her what she was looking for instead of leading. Etc.
His flirting probably also was not what he thought it was. You don't sit and chat there for hours as a dude when the vibe is allegedly good and not make a move to pull or kiss. To him this was a perfect date, to her her expectations were probably dashed and crushed
Many women have been on first dates where they were so into a guy they just let the night progress how he wished, had hot sex that night, had that experience stamped into their minds, and then were involved with that guy for months in what was probably a constant challenge because he didn't care enough about her.
Women go on "dates" and they aren't wow'd like the previous men who have taken them in "dates" especially "dates that had irresistible "spark" sex, she is going to leave a no pull date as still looking for that "spark"
Dates are a horrible idea for men unless you have to go on one. If you need to go on one because you don't have the necessary rapport or initial tension for her to have sex with you, then you need to ensure you heat up that iron as much as you can on it and strike and make some sparks fly and then use your dick like a man.
Edit: some times a woman (for bullet reason #2) had an amazing time but doesn't want to string you along if she thinks you want a relationship and she wasn't seeing you as long term. In this case it's better to YOLO casual. Yet another reason it is a man's job to acquire sex and a woman's job to secure commitment. There are plenty of women who will fuck you after a great date but who won't continue to date you because you're not their envisioned boyfriend. Hence you should not give needy and committed vibes and spend the whole date trying to generate
"sparks"tingles instead, try to fuck if it's possible, but make house plans next time if it's not.MyBoyJob 8mo ago
This post should be archived.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
Thank you.
Perfect is boring has been an idea that has been around for a while.(I can't find the post)
I have a more advanced theory to write about some time about it though that takes it further
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 8mo ago
You suck at the internet.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
409 fcks
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 9mo ago
Surely not this hat guy?!
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
Fixed it lol
No-Stress-Cat 9mo ago
Chad Thundercock strikes again.
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 9mo ago
A) like Vermy said: it probably didn't go as great as the dude thought.
B) most women, if you don't go for sex as fast as possible, they assume you're either not that into them, that you're gay, or that there aren't any "sparks"
C) there are myriad reasons it may have actually gone great and she just lost interest or doesn't want to continue. Many of those possibilities have been enumerated by others already.
pragmatically speaking, it doesn't pay to care, because you will never know the real reason.
The possibilities are too many, the woman isn't going to tell you the truth if you get the chance to ask her, and it's a strong possibility that she doesn't even know why herself beyond a generic, vague "I'm not feeling it".
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
Id argue perfect dates without sex or worse than dates that had some obstacles. Unless she's dying to fuck you, an unideal date can be blamed on other factors and as long as it was good enough, a woman might give it another shot. If it was perfect and she didn't feel anything, she has no choice but to conclude you're not the right guy
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 8mo ago
Heh, @polishknight has said a few times that the first few dates he had with his wife had some things go wrong, but that it was a bonding experience.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
Yeah. If his date has been too perfect it may have very well been a different story. Although norms might have varied at the time
polishknight 8mo ago
Interesting post and thread, thanks.
My wife is a Soviet woman so she's nothing like either western women or even modern EE women. She grew up with hardships so they didn't faze her and she could even be amused by it. I am amused by the saying "Hard times create weak men" when I think this saying more applies to women. American farm girls I knew back 40 years ago also seemed to have a pragmatic outlook.
@Vermillion-RX @whytehorse2021 I have another summary post I'm readying of a 51 yo divorcee who exemplifies the burnout of modern western women whom I would describe as ambivalent entitlement: They enjoy being courted and important but largely don't "need" sex or even a "relationship" hence their "strong, independent" catch-phrase. This one described herself as drooling over a 6'4" guy and a 2nd base makeout in the parking lot but also said she doesn't feel "chemistry". I don't think she was posturing.
This makes me wonder whether she, and many such women, simply don't "feel" anything for men at all similar to some heroin junkie who can barely get high with a near fatal dose.
It's interesting, back to my wife, in that she is sort of cat-like in how she expresses affection. She doesn't make grand gestures of emotional affection including to her daughter most of the time and she doesn't need them herself, but she does clearly look out for the two of us and express concern. Perhaps it's part of her Soviet era stoicism?
So how I think this applies to OP may be this: When the "chemistry" was flowing, like eating perfect food, she enjoyed it but the moment it was over and she got home, she didn't "feel" anything at that moment. Since so many fo these women want to be "led", they lack the ability to even imagine or remember emotions with accuracy or even describe them. (It doesn't help that they project this lack of self-awareness on us.)
"I was so hungry I could eat a horse". We can say that and convey the meaning, but perhaps this woman simply lacks the imagination and inner voice/emotional intelligence to understand that she "felt" something for a reason and then to make a decision to continue it.
I honestly worried that my wife could give my child an eating disorder as she insisted that i should put food in front of my daughter without asking my daughter what she wants. "She doesn't know what she wants so just put everything in front of her". This is why maybe some women can't figure out how to order from a menu? I said my daughter should get the food she asks for, eat the food she commits to, and come back later and get more if she wants.
So imagine this scenario: You go out to dinner hungry and you enjoyed it. You get a call the next day from the restaurant if you'd like to go again and you say: "I don't know, I don't feel hungry right now so there's no chemistry".
Like the low-IQ test for inmates who can't answer the question: "if you didn't eat breakfast this morning, how would you feel?" and they answer: "But I ate breakfast."
Perhaps most of these women are "damaged goods" so to speak.
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 8mo ago
You reversed it. The full thing is:
There's a kernel of truth to it, but in reality there are strong and weak men at any time.
Also of importance: how much input are women allowed? More female input = more bad times.
polishknight 8mo ago
Doh! I have this problem (it's genetic) of mixing up names and words at times, even after a single re-read.
Very well, "good times create weak men". Consider: I believe that wealthy families do produce stronger men in the sense that these men are statistically taller and better educated and tend to be more successful. Education and attention are not wasted on young men but rather essential for their development and a healthy society.
Then... women's equality emerged and all these resources were halved along with wages while the cost of living rose. That really worked out swell as the hypergamous women increased demands while the resources for making the men they increasingly desired dried up.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
The real reason was that he was not 6'7" with 30" arms and a overtly massive bulge that barely fit in the driver's seat of his Lambo. It's in the sidebar bro do you even lift?
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 8mo ago
Oh no
I'm only a 5'11" midget, and I've never had a Lamborghini.
Did all those women I fucked view me as beta bucks?!
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
Yes
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 8mo ago
Guess I'd better get leg-lengthening surgery.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8mo ago
Yes, make sure you get the 8' tall one or you'll be invisible to women. Don't be a 6'5" loser like the rest of these fags
benzino 9mo ago
I'd say escalation and sexual tension isn't that important. It's more about hypergamy and where she perceives you to be in her line-up.
I've had lukewarm dates with little kino, maybe a little kiss, but the girl would keep chasing because I didn't really care about the 2nd date.
Not saying to skip kino and sexual tension but there are definitely cases where it's not necessary for them to start chasing you. Or it's just how Asian girls are. But like the hypothetical question that was posted here a while ago - ask yourself "Would she do that to Chris Hemsworth?"
So in short, be outcome independent and focus on you having fun. The rest is out of your control and there's no point wondering what you could have done to get laid. Either it happens or it doesn't. On to the next
mattyanon Admin 9mo ago
Escalation is vital because it is both attractive AND it tells you were you are in her line up. If you escalate and she fucks you, good chance you feature pretty highly.
The problem here is that this is what the original poster is doing. He is going on dates and having fun. But they always go nowhwere, so he is looking for actionable tips and/or insights so he can get more results.
financehardo420 Should i (x1) 9mo ago
The facts you don’t wanna hear from a certified man whore:
First mistake: taking a girl u haven’t even fucked out for a date. In today’s age you don’t treat women like ladies first. Unlike our judicial system you should view women as guilty until proven innocent. Do not take some random chick on a date where you spend monies. If it’s some random hoe u met at a bar or off tinder and she’s being pretty resistant (if she wanted you she’d do everything to make herself available), it’s 99% likely already RIP. The more rare circumstance where the hesitance is genuine: your “date” should be extremely cheap (talking $10 and under per person - think coffee, slice of pizza, ice cream, etc. you should reserve actual dates for: after you’ve already clapped plural times and you have credible and rational reasons to believe she has potential for LTR. Not hamster spinning reasons.
3.”spent HOURS CHATTING… and ended the night with some PASSIONATE KISSES” = ur a fag. Sorry that might be mean but like ye bro you fumbled the bag beyond repair; women aren’t turned on by beta simps they want MEN who aren’t fuckin timid little pyssies.
Im harsh but i say it w love i want all the dawgs to eat. Learn to swim and learn fast
mattyanon Admin 9mo ago
Ok, I'll give my take on this.
"I've lost count of the number of times"..... so this is something that happens to this man a lot. I'll come back to that.
I'm going to try and work out what's not been said but is likely true:
I think this is a case where a girl is offered a fun and free night out with a nice guy who is not bad looking (but not great looking), he's clearly very nice and he's offering to pay.
He takes a super low risk approach for the girl: a fun time, talks to her a lot, listens to her, flirts with her, and pays.
There are a lot of women who will think "He's sort of OK looking, and I'm not that attracted, but he seems nice and it'll be a laugh. I'd really like to date a nice guy for once, I'm fed up of these assholes railing me and then dumping me. I want to be shown a good time, be courted, and date a nice guy!".
And they try. They really do try. She probably thinks she's doing him a favor by trying. He moves slowly so she's comfortable. End of the night she's tipsy and kisses him because well, that's what you do at the end of the night. He doesn't try for sex because HE IS A NICE GUY.
When pressing for a second date, it's clear that he'll want more than kissing: kissing happened the first time so nice time might be sex. She doesn't want to fuck him...... She thinks: "I mean he's not bad looking, but he's not exciting and clearly he doesn't have many options because of how nice he is being".
There's a good chance there is something subtle in his actions that tell her he doesn't normally get second dates.... She thinks: I wonder why not? What's wrong with him? Well, she doesn't want to be the one to find out. Those other women probably have a point, she thinks. "Thanks, I had a wonderful time, but I'm just not feeling it" she texts, hoping to avoid anything awkward in future.