I've been talking to a girl (from an app) who's generally got a bit of a stick up her ass. I have not met her in person yet. A few days ago I suggested we get together today, which she agreed with but tried to make the plans for us. She just said "meet me at x, we can get dinner". I basically said "Dinner is a terrible idea I'm not doing that." She got butthurt about this and immediately launched into "you just want to hook up with me, what's wrong with dinner? You come up with something better then, etc". I told her I'd come up with something and I'd talk to her later. My current idea is telling her to meet me at x for drinks and some food, then splitting the bill and saying see ya later.
She goes out of her way to talk to me and seems to want my attention, but when she does, she acts like she's got a cock between her legs. I get the sense that she's trying really hard to sus out if I'm "a player", or essentially what my intentions are. I've been extremely vague in this regard and I only really communicate that I'm interested in her, and that I want to meet with her. I've never met a girl who refuses to be feminine and tries to dictate everything (or challenges everything I say) before I have even met her.
On one hand it seems like pretty blatant next, on the other hand I think maybe I could learn a lot by figuring out how to maneuver this. My desire to bed this chick is probably like a 6/10. Assuming you didn't next in this situation, how would you proceed?
edit: I shouldn't have even asked about this because it's a stupid question.
JohnNada 1mo ago
No women argues when she gets fucked properly
Testme 1mo ago
You have some good instincts, but there are problems, obviously.
First of all, I suggest staying away from apps. The kind of girls that use apps are not the most desirable types and the interactions there are weird because the men on apps are either players or losers and the girls therefore react to that defensively. Basically the math of apps is bad, meaning that your statistical chances of finding good women in the real world are a lot better than in an app.
Secondly, do not invite women on dates (unless you are actually already dating them), especially dinners. Dinners (or drinks) are boring, pressure-filled situations that are difficult to make romantic or sexual. What you should do instead is simply go to an interesting public venue and invite her along. For example, you could say, "I am going to be at the Museum of Modern Art on Saturday afternoon, do you want to meet me there?" Other good options are: shopping expeditions, art galleries, city events like festivals, public shows like the kind they have in parks, or interesting idiosyncratic things, like say an auction of rare stamps or weird things like that will be novel to the girl. Elite events like auctions and galas are expecially potent because attending them makes you seem high status. It is the rare girl that will not accept an invitation to meet up at an art auction where paintings worth millions are being sold. Make sure the outing is in a public place with a lot of other people, so she will feel safe.
Most women will try to control the situation, especially if they are intelligent. The best procedure is to ignore such behavior and simply focus on your own initiatives. If a relationship develops, then you can drop hints that you want her to be more docile and submissive to you, but you have to earn her trust first and her confidence that you are a genuine leader.
Feyd0 1mo ago
"Dinner is a terrible idea I'm not doing that"
You already sound like a domineering Andrew Tate wannabe. What is it with you morons thinking you have to be some rude asshole to impress women. Simply: "I'd rather do XYZ, let's meet at X time".
Stick to something short and sweet for girls you've never met. Low investment of your time and money. Grab a coffee and go for a short walk, or get a drink or two at a bar. Worst case you wasted an hour of your life and a couple bucks.
And get out of the mindset that being "alpha" means you have to behave like a childish asshole.
No-Stress-Cat 2mo ago
Dinner? I don't really know you that well, and I'm not that kind of guy!
MrSupreme 2mo ago
Take into account what other commenters told you.However if you decide to go out with her and it does happen, try to disregard her opinions and needs a bit, that kind of chick is probably begging to be taken and fucked caveman style.Just my 2 cents
AbusiveFather1 2mo ago
that's all there is to this post
coolsocks00 1 1mo ago
What's your point?
mattyanon Admin 2mo ago
Dinner is terrible for YOU..... it's great for her, so she doesn't want to hear that her idea, which she wants, isn't a good idea.
Better is "I've got a better idea....... coffee and picnic at X".
Proving that sex isn't her priority and that she wanted a free meal.
Don't suggest splitting the bill. Instead go somewhere that there is no bill to split.
yes, she wants your attention
So why the fuck are you bothering with her?
She's trying to manouvre you into paying, you're behaving like a bitch and not leading like a man.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2mo ago
Are you autistic/retarded?
Telling a girl overtly her date is terrible and the you wonder whys she's argumentative lol
wegojim 2mo ago
I didn't use those words exactly, but regardless you're right. I am a bit retarded, I don't know how I didn't realize that was stupid. I don't have much experience with real world scenarios but I am trying.
Lone_Ranger 1 2mo ago
You haven't even met her and you're already asking us for advice?
Your current idea ("meet me at x for drinks and some food,") sounds EXACTLY like what she said "meet me at x, we can get dinner"
Wtf is the difference?
Your current idea is to get food, split the bill and then say see ya later.
Wtf. If you're just going to bail after meeting, wtf is the point of even meeting her in the first place?
wegojim 2mo ago
I didn't mention she said she's got some event to go to later on, so I didn't want to drive over to her for a few hours then just leave afterward. It's like ~25 miles away, so I wanted her to come to me. It does look dumb as fuck to tell her to come do the same thing, just local to me though.