I always faced backlash whenever I stood up for myself. So it’s almost always been a lose-lose situation for me.
Today, I was taking the elevator down to leave my apartment building. On the way down, the elevator stops, an old guy with a baby stroller appears. As he’s pushing the stroller inside the elevator, he asks me if I’m going down, but all I’m focused on is him pushing the stroller towards me when there’s no space and I was already standing in the corner. There was cleaning equipment taking up some space in the small elevator. I said yes nervously while I was panicking trying to avoid getting hit by the stroller. He said “huh?” so I repeated myself much clearly, then as the door was closing, and I was literally back to the wall, with barely any space to stand, I decided to press the door opening button, and then proceed to exit the elevator, and take the stairs.
I’ve always had this expectation that people are courteous, because I was raised to be courteous myself. I was also raised to be respectful, considerate, nice, caring and put everyone first ahead myself (The perfect recipe for disaster as a man.)
I am skinny as hell at 180cm. I have been eating at a caloric surplus for the past few weeks. I’ve gained some weight, but I still need to gain at least 10 kg to physically exist. I intend on working on strengthening my neck, to make it thicker.
I have noted advice given on another post that I should work out and get bigger, but also become more assertive.
I think that becoming more assertive for me is much more important than the getting bigger part.
How do I become more assertive while I get bigger?