I get the dynamics of Alpha Fux and Beta Bux. What I never understood was how a woman can just completely let go and go completely wild for a man they could not care if he lived or died afterwards. While the man she wants marriage, kids, lifetime commitment gets lame boring sex. But my real question is why she cares so much about what the Beta Bux thinks. I have seen it so many times of how the woman says stuff like "I didnt want you to think of me in a bad light, I didnt want you to think less of me, I didnt want to lose your respect." and etc, etc.
Why is the Bets Bux opinion so important to her? I have seen posts after posts of women living in mortal fear of their Beta finding out that she was a lot more wilder with other men than him. The usual reason is "I dont want him to think bad of me." Why is that? Meanwhile, the face tattooed carnival ride operator she hopes she never sees again and could care less what he thinks got every position, every hole and her sexual best.
pofkaf 1 2y ago
You're thinking about the dynamics incorrectly.
She desperately wants to see the alpha male again (contrary to what you think). She wants to earn his commitment, even if he never gives it to her. So she will do anything to please him.
Then she meets some chump who kisses the ground she walks on. It's easy to get his commitment - and along with it, his validation, money, and resources. She barely needs to do anything to keep him around, so the sex is boring.
When the alpha dumps her, it takes a long time for her to get over it. This is where the term "alpha widow" comes from...no matter who else she fucks, she will always think lesser of future boyfriends as she compares them to the alpha.
She doesn't want to lose the beta because if that happens, she will also lose a lot of money, resources, and validation. It doesn't make sense for her to cut off her primary source of means.
So as a man, you have to walk a fine line when seriously considering a woman for a long term mate. You have to be alpha enough to keep her interested and willing to please you. But you also have to be beta enough to keep her from becoming disengaged.
shaketheroom 2y ago
Ive alpha widowed girls who wouldnt take me back though. You can hurt them too much if they believe there is no relationship value to be redeemed. She replaced me with a low value beta. Its not so black and white.
Its all about relationship value. If you break up and theres RMV there, she may consider it again. But if you are too alpha and broke relationship value rules, its over. She will spend her time and sex tokens with a beta over the alpha.
Basically when an AF breaks the plate, its over. She would rather invest into a lower value guy. If she gets back with the alpha who did her wrong, the plate was never truly broken. So yeah, if an AF fucks up bad enough the plate can break and not be repaired.
Seagram7 2y ago
So she wants the face tattooed Mongo the badass biker, and that is who she wanted commitment from and not the rich beta? Mongo is the guy she wants to run off with and not marry the guy that has country club membership...got it
But if she does happen to marry the beta, why lie to him. Why worry about what he thinks? That is what I'm wondering
Seagram7 2y ago
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/u3ixo1/update_my_33f_fianc%C3%A8_30m_is_being_cold_towards_me/
I beg to differ sir. This link is on example and there are plenty out there as well as girls that have said in real life that the fuckboi(I hate that term) was so much fun but she would never consider marriage with him while the beta she wants a commitment real bad from gets boring sex. Most of all, she DOES NOT want him to find out she is capable of better fucking than she is giving him. This link is what sparked my question.
In case no one want to click the link, here is a summary: Girl in her prime bangs Chad and no sex act is off the table. Hits the wall and now wants to settle with rich Beta. Beta wants wild sex acts. She LIES and says she never did wild sex acts and never will. Of course Fate and Irony brings Chad into their social circle. Chad tells Beta everything to include video evidence. Hilarity ensues. Beta downgrades fiancée to just dating and takes back rings. Beta redirects his anger and hurt from lying former fiancée to Chad and wants girl to file police report on Chad for Revenge Porn. The rest is her hamstering on why she is a fucking liar, thinks counseling is going to fix everything, and the vilification of Chad who is now up there with that guy who started WWII. Literally calls Chad a piece of shit.
Funny that the great guy that she wants to marry and professes true love for got the boring starfish sex while the, in her own words, "piece of shit" got the no holds barred every sex act imaginable that she did with wild, feral abandon.
pofkaf 1 2y ago
Everything you mentioned reinforces my point. You're just thinking about it incorrectly.
One of the core tenets of TRP is believe what women do instead of what they say. The simple fact that she allowed the alpha into her life again, and still thinks about him all the time, is proof enough.
Keep studying and practicing. You'll figure it out sooner or later.
chadinthemaking69 2y ago
I think initially women get married to who they perceive as alpha (unless they get married later in their life) and eventually wear him down and he loses frame and becomes unattractive to her = starfish sex.
There’s a lot of examples in marriedrp where men have turned around their sex life because they started acting alpha again.
Marriage doesn’t automatically mean starfish sex. Starfish sex means beta though. Or a lazy girl.
shaketheroom 2y ago
Not always true, most girls purposely go for guys who are purposely beta, to secure them. Obviously these guys are alpha enough social skills, frame, etc to maintain a relationship but they know hes not going to walk into rooms and take them over, or intimidate men, or be gawked at by young HB8-9s in public, or get any type of special "alpha" treatment
chadinthemaking69 2y ago
Yeah I hear you. If you look at Elon and the mother of most of his children (Talulah?) she is visibly manipulating him and laughing about it on the interview. Pure beta bux
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
Arousal??
It's not complicated
Beta bux is resources mostly. You think a guy is gonna shill out resources to a slut? Probably not, hence the facade of being a pure girl and not doing crazy shit for him in bed
Also she wouldn't do crazy shit in bed for him because she's not actually aroused
You mean maxed themselves out of the sexual marketplace and had to choose a guy they wouldn't have if they weren't smashing the wall
Lone_Ranger 2 2y ago
I've said if before, I'll say it again: Women will fuck men they wouldn't dream of marrying. But they will also marry men they wouldn't dream of fucking. That is the origin and cause of starfish sex.
Seagram7 posts an interesting link to a long story which is actually quite illuminating. Its about a woman who is 33, obviously has a past and is now post wall and dating a guy that is beta bucks. She is giving beta bucks boring sex and he's pretty pissed off when he finds out that she had all the exciting sex in the past with her alpha chads. The discussion on reddit are long and complex, but interestingly, they all fail to mention one particular point:
She describes how she first met her beta bucks. They went out for more than two months and HAD NOT EVEN KISSED. That is 100% proof that she does not see him as a sexual person, she sees him as a walking wallet that is going to resolve her post wall problems.
TRPDuryodhana 2y ago
This reminded me of this post Rollo did once, https://therationalmale.com/2013/12/03/saving-the-best/.
Guy suffering a deadbeat sex life with wife since the begining of his marriage. The reason? Wife says she doesn't like this 'degrading' stuff. Only later he finds out an old college video of hers, going at it with five guys in a gang bang lol. Stuff of nightmare truly.
Lone_Ranger 2 2y ago
When a woman says 'I didn't want you to think less of me ...etc etc' this is all nonsense. You'll read it over and over again in RP - you need to pay less attention to what they say and more attention to what they do.
They certainly didn't worry about what chad thought of them when they knelt down in the bathroom to suck his cock 7 minute after meeting him. They certainly didn't worry about 'respect'.
This sort talk (I want you to respect me) is just excuses. You need to translate in your own head what she is saying. This is what she is saying;
"I am a slut and I like to degrade myself, basically because I hate myself. So that is why I find it so exciting to give myself to men that hate me. But its not a good long term plan. So after slutting around for ten years, being treated like the whore that I am, I'm now looking for a 'nice guy' who will pay for my life and let me implement the self replication project. You look like a 'nice guy'. Clearly, I don't want to have sex with you, because I am repulsed by suitable men, they are beta. But we should get married and never have sex. Except maybe 2 or 3 times, depending on how many kids I want. If I do feel like having sex, I will bang the gardener if he is total loser with a man bun."
mattyanon Admin 2y ago
I don't think you do.
She needs him to think she is worthy of marriage
And this is half true, the other half of "don't want you to see me as a whore" is that she is covering for her own lack of attraction.
See above
She doesn't want those beta bucks to go away before she has time to make him legally obligated to start paying alimony.
Men fall for this shit. They believe they have married an angel "who just isn't interested in sex". This world view (that she has carefully constructed) would be shattered if he found out, and good chance he'd leave or make things worse for her in some way.
Right. No bucks available here.
Seems simple enough to me, what part aren't you getting?
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 2y ago
Your title is a false dichotomy.
Almost every woman I've been with has been up for just about anything and were frequently more kinky than me. Almost all of them tried to lock me down.
The one who successfully locked me down was and is uninhibited with me (discounting the dead bedroom period that led to my finding the Red Pill).
If a woman only gives a man starfish sex, then she isn't aroused by him. She might like his beta provisioning and comfort, but he has no alpha arousal.
A man can have both alpha/arousal and beta/comfort behaviors and traits, and he needs both to successfully navigate an LTR.
shaketheroom 2y ago
I think its simply just validation. She wants the alpha's validation. She doesnt care for the betas because its low value and also secured.
She wants to win over the alpha, by being as submissive as possible. This includes a sexual menu the beta cant access.