The girl's pictures are at the bottom of the album. https://imgur.com/a/E7841pi
She was a HB6 in her photos and I messaged her to talk on campus school after class. When we met I didn't recognize her at all. She had done something different wither her (pinned up and not flattering). Also looked heavier, fat to be honest. Even had on a baggy sweater, what a shame. She was somewhere between a HB3.5-4. Maybe I'm being too harsh rn, but at that moment her looks weren't turning me on.
Instantly teased her about her glasses and how they're grandma glasses. " Sat down to talk and she fired back about how my eyebrows "need trimming beneath." I let her do most of the talking and was asking her about herself a lot, I was genuinely trying to understand her. She asked me my height, said 6ft. And
her: nah, you're 5'11. Most guys exaggerate their height.
Reaffirmed I'm in fact 6' and proved her wrong. So I teased her about being bad with numbers and estimates which is why she's got a C in math. Asked about her friends. She mentioned how she finds people annoying, so only has 1. Also said how she likes being independent and making money etc. So once she said this paired with her shit tests earlier I just went into her with the teasing with a few neggs.
I was being cocky and she'd say "wow, okay so not humble". She said I gave off "army brat vibes" whatever that means. I just A&A. Agreed that I was confident and even tried to build rapport by saying you gotta get to know me thoroughly. I didn't say those things back to back, but I really was trying to build rapport yet she was a bit stern.
My foot tapped hers twice
her: do that a third time and see what happens
Wasn't going to NOT do it now. I did it a third time a couple minutes later and she paused.
me: you felt that right
her: yes I did. It was nice meeting you.
and she got up and left. Later texted me on snap saying "you were nicer at (clubname). Apparently I had met her a couple months back with a friend and we played a round of jenga and she remembered. Said she can't lecture me for being rude when she walked off.
her: I walked off because of how you were talking to me. I found it rude.
I really don't care about the outcome. However I'm asking for feedback on my performance. I wouldn't wanna make these same mistakes with an HB8 in the future. Was I an asshole and where did I go wrong? Thanks.
StrongWamyn 1y ago
She's probably just got low confidence and poor social skills. Don't worry about it.
You don't have to GAF, but just hit her with:
"Hey, I did not mean to disrespect you. I thought you were being snarky and sassy with flirting, I was just meeting that energy. I guess that was not the move lol. Sorry about the misunderstanding, I hope we're chill if I see you around. "
It's a pretty based reply acknowledges she's a human with feeling and that people can have misunderstandings, but also does not ask for anything from her. It makes here work if she wants to see you and makes it so she has no reason to cock block you with other girls.
Also if she IS petty and does try to cock block you can tell the other girl about the apology (pin the message) which will show you have good communication and are emotionally stable, then just play it off as she ruined her shot and is jealous. I have totally had the angry girl make another girl be MORE attracted to me. When she saw me I deal with the angry girl gently she saw she could be safe with me. She was like oh she's and I was like no, well maybe but she's just hurting and I'm sure she was jealous seeing me here with you, I try to cut her some slack. That girl want me now cause my confidence is unshakeable and she knows she as a girl is gonna act crazy and I'm gonna be able to help her stay grounded. Girls love it when you are emotionally unaffected by their bullshit.
imtranscending 1y ago
I agree with your analysis. Also thanks for the apology idea, I was thinking about it but wasn't sure if it warranted an apology. A man should reserve his apologies for when they're absolutely needed. This may or may not have been one of those times. I'm just trying to be a wholesome person through this journey of mastery. I apologized days ago and she hasn't opened the snap message. I've moved on, balls in her court.
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imtranscending 1y ago
What IOIs stood out to you besides meeting me.
I mean TRP doesn't endorse complete disrespect right? Nor am fan of being an asshole. Did I cross the line though?
Hard working by paying for her own school and she probably has to work a ton too. I kept telling her the people thing is a her problem. I genuinely care for people and she does sound like a sad person. I don't want to rescue her, but maybe I can be that friend she never had. Not sure how I'd accomplish that, but at least be open to talking with her in person more. I don't want her thinking she has won me over through, I'm not tryna game her. I certainly wish I had more people reached out to me when I was socially blunt and a tripping aspy. Loneliness sucks man.
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Objetpetita 1y ago
It's hard to judge from a text description, but it doesn't sound like you went too far or anything. Walking out over a damn foot tap is childish, coupled with other things like the one friend it doesn't sound like she's socially well adjusted.
There's definitely a balance to be struck between teasing and comfort building. Maybe back off on the teasing a little to see if that's better, you have to calibrate it till you're at a good level. It also varies between individual girls. You just have to see how she reacts to teasing and either back off or go harder during the conversation, or adjust your approach altogether on the fly based on what seems to work rather than what you planned beforehand.
"Be not contained by formula", ninth lesson of Pook.
imtranscending 1y ago
Maybe I went too far, maybe not. It's in the past now.
Yess, that is very good.
fumbor 1y ago
She sounds miserable
You should have been able to tell from the photos she is fat though. When they do a close up of their face like that in the 1st photo, especially with filter, you'd be surprised how fucking huge the rest of their body is. I've seen it a million times. She is not even worth acknowledging
imtranscending 1y ago
You're completely correct. I knew she'd be chubby, maybe what I'd call even a little fat. A nice face and big tits will offset some extra weight for me. In those photos she also had a pretty face, I guess that can be contributed to her being all dolled up. She also had big tits, I even added another pic of her in a bra she recently added (second from the bottom). But I couldn't really see them today.
She just looked feminine in her profile, but acted far it and didn't look pretty. Not to sound beta, but I'd like to be somewhat available as a friend if she wants. Not gonna game her through, no attraction.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
While I think she was overly sensative, this doesn't sound like good game. Sounds like all you did was give her shit.
Might work on a hottie that has too high of an ego and needs to be starved of validation but all you did was rip on her from what you've posted
I'll say it again, game is like pong, it's just a back and forth. Sometimes the ball goes places you don't predict, sometimes the ball is slow, some times it's fast. But you gotta adjust to where the ball is. In dating both people lose rounds.
Your goal is to win this game of pong, if you lose it the girl leaves. You need to win more rounds than she does. But at the same time no girl wants to be blown out in a game of pong 10 to zero.
That's essentially what you did. It was almost all giving her shit. No girl wants to play against that unless she's only used to winning and finally gets an asshole-game dude that makes her lose a game hard
This video is the perfect metaphor of what your game is like from all of your posts.
https://youtu.be/kJ8NphYi1rU
Imagine you're the player that keeps moving around erratically on the right always trying to over predict where the pong ball is going to go and missing a lot of defends vs the player on the left that is in control and has a better sense of where the pong ball is going to be.
You're definitely gaming like the player on the right. Either the player on the left is a good metaphor for a girl you are gaming or just you compared to some other dude with more solid game.
View it from both perspectives but so long as you keep being the dude on the right instead of the dude on the left you're going to keep running into these game failures. You need to be playing pong instead of chess.
You're pre-assuming how your "game" is going to go. Every field report you have sounds like you're running through a script in your head of what to already do instead of being reactive to what's directly in front of you.
In this case you seem to have been predetermined to give her shit as part of your game and you couldn't abandon the script once it started. You have to instinctively react to the vibe of the situation and go with what is in front of you.
I seriously get the vibe that you are determining in your head what the outcome of all of your interactions will be before you've even made it a minute or two into the set. Every girl is different. You should react to the moment not to an anticipation
You lack flexibility
I'm trying my best to help you realize what you're doing after each field report
imtranscending 1y ago
You summed it up, I was going hard on her.
That link was a good example of how my interactions would go.
Maybe. I have a goal in mind, maybe it comes across like that? Maybe that goal (my desired outcome) is making me stiff and not fluid. I don't consciously think "This is how I will treat her" or "she's hot, so let's say this to soften her up a little. "Maybe I'm conflating things, but clearly I wanna fuck. How do I not let that intention/motivation ruin my interactions, what goes on in your head when you approach? Did I just confirm your diagnosis by saying that I may be playing the ending of every encounter?
I'm unsure of the motivation, but that first comment I made to her about the glasses can be indicative of that.
Dude I know, you try really hard. I appreciate it so much, thank you. It even takes me some time to respond to your elaborated analyses. You and this community will contribute to the dub of me pairing with a woman and getting laid.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
I am convinced you have a mental representation in your mind of how game should go, and when confronted with hurdles that don't match your expectations for a set, you bomb because you can't play the moment to moment game.
Next time you talk to a chick, literally have no expectations for an outcome. Literally just be in the moment. I literally don't think of any of my sets in terms of game I just follow 1) be attractive 2) don't be unattractive.
I can feel the girl has had an overt shift in tone or behavior then maybe I think about game but like your mind runs on game. You gotta stop. You might get a chick in bed by doing that but I doubt it.
I literally just interact with them and I just have an attractive vibe. A lot of girls just like that. They end up gaming themselves. When I first started out though like I actually did have to think about game but I wasn't successful until I just started reacting in the moment.
You absolutely have to just work with what's in front of you. You can't formulistically come up with some way of gaming the set.
Like.the player on the right, it's obvious they have some preconception about where the pong will go and they started moving way far down the screen only to come back in to place, often way too late or not at all.
The player on the right is like "okay they're gonna hit it there so I'm gonna move here, oh wait oops it went all the way over there instead, dang I moved way too far it should have been there, cause I hit it this way and so they should have hit it that way and now oh man I missed it"
The player on the left is causally like, "alright I kinda see what angle my opponent hit it at so imma just move up here a little bit slightly cause that's all I need, oh nice I hit it off the corner and it flustered my opponent, I win the round cool"
You need to be the dude on the left. He's moving up and down like a fraction of an inch to hit most shots while his opponent is all over the screen. When the dude on the right hits a crazy shot back the guy in the left goes to make a quick save but besides that he's just chilling.
The guy on the left plays it easy until the dude on the right does a crazy shot, in which it's appropriate to make a quick move where no one's gonna judge you for missing the shot if you give a solid attempt and win most rounds being chill (frame).
Plus when they guy on the right makes a crazy hit, it doesn't look out of place when the guy in the left makes the same move. But when the dude on the right is overplaying his hand on every hit it's like what the fuck is he doing?
Literally man, I game girls like the guy on the left. Small maneuvers until they give me a reason to make a big swipe defensively. My game is tame and in control until they escalate and I have to make a return escalation.
Otherwise I'm winning one controlled round at a time. You don't need to make power plays and overly gamey moves as long as you win the round of pong. Dude getting laid is the dude on the left making small adjusted movements throughout the game.
And not every game of this pong is gonna be a lay. Sometimes it's a phone number. Sometimes it's a first date. Sometimes it's she comes over to your place, sucks your dick and doesn't fuck you until the next time she comes over.
If you're trying to play a game of pong for the lay when it's a number close situation you're gonna lose
Edit: I didn't mean to use guy guy example in each scenario. In game your pong opponent is always the girl, maybe sometimes her friend or some jealous guy, but yeah I didn't mean to compare two dudes playing game against each other
akihonj 1y ago
Iisten
She's a fat ego driven mess with a shitty attitude who did a bit of catfishing, she walks and did you a favour.
I wouldn't waste another second of my time wondering about her.
coolsocks00 1 1y ago
This. Yuck
OPPTRP 1y ago
Not surprised her last pic is probably the closest representation of what she looks like. Which is why it’s last because no one will really look at it but she can say I do look like my pics with no hint of irony
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
No, she's pretty god damned fat and you know the pics are cherry picked.
Only hot girls enjoy this.
Ok, this is shit test FAILED. You proved that you CARE WHAT SHE THINKS. You should just shrug to the height thing like her opinion means nothing to you.
That's more like it :)
Right. She wants you to suck up to her. She's fat and not very confident.
Hotter girls will often like the teasing, but they all need some comfort eventually.
whytehorse2021 1y ago
OK, you need to learn how to use negging. This is effective on women with bitch shields and/or overinflated egos. Like the hot chick at the bar who instinctively shoots down every guy that approaches by insulting him. It's what guys do to one another when socializing and is known as a nuclear shit test. You have to be very careful about which women you use it on because, as you can see from your own experience, it can hurt their feelings and make them leave.
I don't know anything about fat chick game but my guess is you just butter up their ego and then they let you lift up their FUPA and stick your dick in.
imtranscending 1y ago
For negging I may have done it in the past, I’ll read up on it and add it to the toolbox
grosss man.