How do I get more respect from people? This is less of a general question and more of a specific scenario thing. Basically tho when I first meet people it always is really chill, I usually hit it off with people pretty good at first, but it almost also always ends up with them acting like my older sibling. Like not like overtly disrespectful, but messing around and light teases that accumulate to feel like disrespect. I’m young (17) so it makes sense for some older people to feel like older family members or siblings, but even people my age feels like they start to look down on me after getting to know me more… “your slow” is a common thing people say. I notice it happens a lot with girls where they start out giving a lot of IOIs, but then after a while it feels like I just become a joke most of the time. I can sense the respect slowly go away when I talk to certain people longer. My problem used to be that I acted like a clown but I thought I fixed that. Its like no one takes me seriously in anything. This happens a lot with co workers and classmates, but not really in other social areas. I don’t really know how to articulate this well but hopefully someone can relate to something and give advise. Basically tho how do I get people to respect me more and take me more seriously?
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moorekom 3y ago
Once you learn how to covey more while saying less, respect will come.
Hiram_abiff 3y ago
I like that. Feel like talking too much might be one of my problems.
tyler123 3y ago
For me this was caused by caring about other people's opinions too much and them feeling it out. If you try too hard to give off a likeable impression they'll smell this. When they say you're slow shoot back quick or do w/e works that doesn't make you look like a negative comment throws you off.
Real respect only comes from being successful in any field, as long as you're average or below average you won't have respect. I used to be called slow just for people to change their opinion and call me "very smart/intelligent" once I focused more on success.
Intrepid_Place53900 1 3y ago
Respect is earned.
You are 17, have you earned any respect from people, especially people older than you?
You must respect yourself first, before anyone would or should respect you. It sounds like you are taking those steps.
(How do you get people to respect you more)?
You respect yourself, hold yourself accountable, and treat others respectfully.
does this mean they'll respect you? No, many people don't deserve any respect themselves, do you think they treat others respectfully?
XMRLover 3y ago
You get more respect by doing things that people respect. Being jacked, starting a successful business, being a high salary employee, having interesting and skilled hobbies, traveling to exotic places, learning in-depth about subjects that you like...
People look up to you because these things take work, dedication, and a little bit(Or a lot of bit) of courage. You have to earn these things.
Nobody is going to respect the overweight guy who plays video games and works at McDonald's. A harsh truth, but a good one to know.
Hiram_abiff 3y ago
Facts for sure. I get you need experience an accomplishments en shit to get respect but like im not tryna have anyone kiss my shoes or any shit like that , im just tryna figure out how should i react when people seem to disrespect me or go a little too far. Like how do you set up boundaries? What i usually do is just act like i dont care, usually a blank "ok" staring them in the eyes but that doesnt keep them from doing something again. Which over time not doing any retaliation makes you look like a bitch, but doing too much makes you look like you care too much. How do you find a middle ground?
XMRLover 3y ago
Let's make it simple and a little to the extreme. Ask yourself 2 questions;
Status is everything. You can almost immediately tell if someone has status by the clothes they are wearing and their body language. These people also don't give a rats ass what other people think.
Earn the respect and you will earn the ability to brush off the small amount of bullshit you ever get. Surround yourself with high status people as well.
Boosted_Arrow 3y ago
I'm 21 and I can relate very much to what you said. "Afte a while the respect slowly fade away." This happens to me as well.
Unfortunately I don't know where it comes from. (Perhaps we could chat to figure that one out, I'll send you a DM)
What are your hobbies? What's your personality like? Maybe it's sth. like this.
Respect can usually be preserved by being assertive. What helped me was to watch videos about assertiveness and "Shadow integration" by Jordan Peterson. I know he's a bluepill idiot, but as a doctor he knows his psychology stuff very well, and it was quite useful to me.
Hiram_abiff 3y ago
Yeah for sure man. I think the one comment above from tyler123 makes sense cus i think a part of the problem is caring too much. I think explaining yourself too much on things that dont matter makes people lose respect for you as well. especially trying to explain in a funny way just makes you look needy. Im tryna get out of the "Always try to be funny" mentality so that might help.
Boosted_Arrow 3y ago
"Always try to be funny" mentality
Yeah I got that as well.
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