Hi, I am 33 and just started mingling after ending many years of marriage. I am getting lots of numbers from OLD, day/lunch break game, night game, and in the clubs. Four times in a row I have encountered stiff LMR. I tried backing off, I tried escalating again. Sometimes I succeed in the escalation, but the girl always seems to remember that she decided that it's over. These escalate quickly from meet to date to hook up at my place.
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19 year asian old from Bumble. we are hooking up downstairs in chairs. O from my hands alone, access to everything. I want to move upstairs, I pick her up, carry her upstairs, lay her down on my FLOOR BED (is this the problem?? girls who like you will do you in a bathroom stall), and suddenly she's LMR city after another orgasm.
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26 year asian old from jury duty. we are hooking up outside in my back yard. hot and heavy, she's submissive, loves getting choked. shirts off, condos above us, she doesn't care. access to everything. move her inside and LMR, orders an uber while I do dishes
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22 year old brazilian from night game. bring her back another night, she comes back to my place with my friend, leaving her friend. that took a lot of work for me to get her separated, she really liked me. my friend bounces, we're hot and heavy. then LMR. By this time I'm pretty good at dealing with it and I kept attraction and she'll be back in my city in a few months, and she keeps in touch.
- 20 year old white girl from lunch break game. super super hot, sporty, lil black dress, jean jacket, white high tops. same day she BYO's to my place wearing loose shorts and tank top. again, my friend, i am in there, all access, she's grinding, whispering, hands free. she requests a couch, i suggest a room, bring her up, her dog cries (literally her dog was chillin downstairs), and it's not happening anymore. I eventually escalated back real well with her but she dipped. This is recent and she's sending me paragraphs of breakup text to which I am playing cool, making her laugh, and now leaving her on read. she can text me perhaps if she ever wants to come over and try again, or i can hit her up in some weeks.
Am I not building enough attraction? They're getting naked and hot until they go to my room. Is it literally my floor bed? I own whole house in the city but I'm kind of a cowboy and I sleep on the floor. I display wealth and value. They're down to hook up on a stool in my living room but not a floor bed?
Or wait, is that the problem? Am I destroying the tension of the hook up when I move it to another room? I am hands free on these ladies, they're naked and moaning, do I really need to re-create sexual tension again when I move them? Would I get the lay if I had stayed downstairs and done it on my bar stools and bar?
One of my friends suggested that none of these times did I place the girl's hand anywhere, or demand some kind of sexual favor. In my old strategy, I always please the girl for a long time until she uncontrollably wants me. Are these girls feeling awkward that I'm not demanding anything from them and focusing on them?
Either way I'm getting really good at playing it cool with LMR since it was shocking to me at first. I didn't used to encounter it, though, so it seems like there is a better way than beating it, rather, don't encounter it. Having sex would be awesome though
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coolsocks00 1 2y ago
Stop doing that and start actually putting your dick inside them. Push-pull until that happens.
But did you actually go for the freeze-out? If she pulls back. you pull back more than she wants you to. Get ready to leave or kick her out, leaving her desires unfulfilled. If this doesnt work after 1-2 times then she's just there for validation or whatever, so kick her out.
I think there might actually be something to it. It's not that they wouldnt fuck you on the floor bed, it's just not what they expect going in, and so it could flip a switch. Either work in the "room tour" before they're already getting into it, or fuck them somewhere else. Anywhere.
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coolsocks00 1 2y ago
This whole premise is fucked once you're operating in her frame. Stop thinking you have to do X to make her stay.
It's better to build tension and release that by PiV sex, instead of wasting it on what's essentially the poor man's orgasm, oral/fingering (still heaps better than no orgasm).
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
It depends a lot on if they are trying to fuck you. I had a girl I was finger blasting and she couldn't take the tension any longer and told me she wanted me inside her.
I gave in (should have made her cum first) and put it in instead. I did make her cum during sex but yeah I should have told her she was gonna cum for me first from my fingers
But yes, the point of my anecdote is that she made it overtly clear she wanted to fuck and I strongly sensed she wanted to fuck before she even said that. In that case you know you can give them an orgasm and they'll still want you in them
Edit: I knew she'd still want to fuck even after cummings so in this case yeah, it would have been good to deliver extra ones to her. Not always a good idea
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mattyanon Admin 2y ago
Your'e 33, she's 19, don't expect too much.
Ok, that's a bit fucked up.
Come back to this one
Still super young, again don't expect too much.
This is odd. Happy to get naked, but then bounce when they're in bed with you? That's really weird.
I'd suggest not breaking the fun and taking them to bed, fuck them on the couch to avoid the break.
It could be your bed / bedroom....... tidy? nice lighting? pot plants? arty semi-naked girls? Comfortable for girls, or like a serial killer's kill room?
Not the tension, but the flow and the comfort.
You have to back off and then re-escalate after a break like this.
Actually this could be a factor.
Stool in your living room is spontaneous.
Flood bed is poor/studenty/rough.
he's right
Not awkward that you demand nothing: this is totally fine and they are comfortable with things being one sided.
BUT
This is zero investment from her and after she cums her sexual motivation plummets. They work a lot like guys: frustrated and pre-orgasm they are highly motivated. Satisfied and post-orgasm many girls will lose interest in you. (Some will maintain high interest, some won't).
It's much easier to get a hot and sexed up girl to be familiar with your dick than a satisfied and relaxed girl. Frustrated and horny she'll happily jerk and suck you...... happy relaxed and satisfied...... why would she bother?
I get the whole "satisfy her first", but it's actually pretty beta.
Generally as a man you do want her to cum first, because you'll lose interest after you cum. So here's a plan:
Get her really frustrated rather than satisfied. Forwards/backwards... tease.... back... forwards..... tease...... NO ORGASM.
While you're doing this, get her to do stuff with/to you...... stroking your dick, sucking you...... etc
Alternative plan: don't have sex on first meeting...... it's fine to (BOTH!) cum, but avoid sex and you'll have more chance of seeing her again.
whytehorse2021 2y ago
It's hard to tell. LMR is usually an anti-slut defense. The way around it is to give her something to pretend she's not a slut. "Would you like to come upstairs to my bedroom to see my etchings?". Then the next day she can say "Well I went to his room to check out his etchings and then tripped and fell on his dick" or some crap like that.
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whytehorse2021 2y ago
Yeah you'd have to update it to the modern era. Wanna come see my youtube studio?
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Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
I think the other users answered this adequately, so this won't be a detailed comment. Moving a girl should not have an effect. If anything it could enhance her experience if you move her to a More comfortable place to fuck.
But the floor bed might be throwing them off simply because it's like "the rest of his house is normal and then what the fuck is this doing here?"
Alternatively, moving a girl is an art. Imagine you're on the verge of orgasm and some girl gets you into a different room and then you go soft. When she finally makes you cum it's not nearly as good as it could have been. Same thing for women except it's possibly worse because you're also breaking apart their stream of imagination and the zone they are in
There is an art to moving girls. I usually try to move girls to a bedroom (even if it's at their place) when they start trying to take off their shirt. When they are trying to get themselves naked and you make them wait it builds tension. Because they are like "damn, I'm trying to make this work and I have to wait a bit"
So if you move them at the right time before they are progressing towards orgasm, it shouldn't fuck you up, because at that point they are still anticipating more moves from you, not a move currently in progress that is being disrupted heavily