Hi guys,
I entered the whole pick-up/seduction scene this year and I have already 700 approaches under my belt. The beginning was really hard but I am getting better and better. But still there are some points I clearly have to work on. I am getting "a lot" of numbers but at the same time, a lot of them are flakes and its starting to drain my energy.
Most of time I knew when I got a flake number or not. When I just talked with her 3-4 minutes, got her number and left immediately. I knew this number is a waste of time but now. Sometimes I have 30minutes conversation with girls. I try to talk for 10-15min, getting her number and then to talk some minutes more to build some comfort. And I still get flakes.
I have to admit, sometimes I am not really using techniques like push and pull (I still have to get used to it) or I sexualize not enough? It just does not make sense for me when I talk with her like 30-45minutes, we have a great time and then I dont even get a respond on whatsapp.
I dont write huge texts, its casual as fuck like "Hey Whatsup x, its me y, what you doing blabla..."
I just noticed its drain so much energy when you have so long conversations for nothing. Even if its just 20-30 min but still. I prefer to have a flake number from the beginning than have a good conversation and then nothing, but maybe its just part of the game?
Any advice what helped you a bit?
Tooktheredpill 2y ago
700 approaches?! Good on you man. That’s about 699 more than most dudes would do, but the first thing that came to my mind was the amount of total time all of that took.
Nadox12 2y ago
Thats a good question. I know in summer I spend whole afternoons and evening just approaching. I went out afternoon approached alone and at the evening I approached with my friend. When I think back on it sounds insane but I am so glad that I did that. Because it changed me as a person. I now know what I am capable of. And thats not even the limit, those approached could be way better.
I really think every guy should something in this magnitude to learn more about himself. This is widsom you cant buy, you have to feel it and it will be so helpful. Yesterday I had sex with a new girl of mine, I approached on my campus last winter. 2 Years ago I would have never done that.
I am pretty confident that if your game is on point. You can approach each week 10+ girls and a matter of 1-3 hours. This is NOTHING. Lets say you get a nice girl each month, you already have after 3-4 months enough girls to fuck around with. And you can slow down and just approach the girls you really wanne have.
I have to add, in a way its even addicting (in a positive way). Its like in every skill, you are getting better and better, have better results. And its incredible how far you actually can get sometimes
User4566 2y ago
Fuck me, and I thought I had it bad! I've only approached about 10 girls in my life and got all of their numbers. I've also recently started approaching about a month ago. Here's something I've noticed about one of the girls compared to the others: BODY LANGUAGE. If a girl isn't smiling, isn't trying to look sexy, doesn't look happy that you approached her, fucking dip and don't even ask her out. I've got number from girls that looked disinterested but still gave me their number and whenever I ask them out, they give me "maybe" or "we'll see". I always hard next after that. A girl who shows interest like that will likely take a very long time to fuck, rather than the girl who is flirty and happy that you approached her.
Sometimes it takes some time to open the girl up to you because girls are more used to guys DMing them on Tinder, Snapchat, and instagram and they don't get approached by guys often irl so she's likely going to be caught off guard by a guy approaching her. This is something a lot of old-heads on here get wrong, not a lot of guys approach girls unless it's at a party or bar where they drunk to forget their anxiety. A few weeks back, I talked to a girl in my college cafeteria and gave her company while she ate and we talked for about 45 minutes and her body language and vibe changed a lot. I actually feel like I raised her interest because I acted like I actually gave a shit about what she had to say.
I actually approached a girl like 15 minutes ago in the gym to ask if she knew any exercises to target a certain area (because she was doing those exercises) and she looked at me like "ya ya, whatever". But one week ago, I approached a woman who was surprisingly 10 years older than me and she had a COMPLETELY different vibe. She was smiling the whole time, and said she would have gone out with me if I wasn't 10 years younger than her.
It is 100% a numbers game. Maybe start approaching some 5s and 6s.
Nadox12 2y ago
Thanks for the reply. Usually the older women are easier to game because they get less approached over the last years. But you are clearly right about the body language. My last 5 approaches I got 4 numbers. One was a fake number (my second in my life lol it was super weird). And all other 3 literally were laughing as fuck, one touched me and the another one just went to the mirrow to make her pretty just to talk to me.
Sometimes its just weird. But as you said its number game
helpfulguy22 2y ago
How old are you if you don’t mind me asking
User4566 2y ago
I just turned 22 in October.
mattyanon Admin 2y ago
How many flake? Some? all? 50%? 99%?
Girl needs to be invested enough and attracted enough that you rise above her other options when you are NO LONGER THERE. This is not easy.
Touch them?
Talk about fun things in your life?
Invite them to a fun thing to do together in future?
push pull is flirty and great
don't sexualise overtly. do touch.
Right... in future start with "hey girl, XXX with the YYY hair here..... you know the skydiving guy". If she forgets your name or details she'll just bail.
"You're fun, we should do X together" / "yeah, sounds awesome".
[change subject]
"Right... how about next Friday for X?" / "yeah, I'd love that" / "Great, shoot me your number and we'll make it happen".
Nadox12 2y ago
I usually asked like that "Hey do you wanne exchange numbers", if she says yes I am following with "cool we can go for a walk etc." I think thats not that great right?
I was thinking to do it now like "Hey do you like musuems? Blabla" lets go togehter there" if she says yes then I would ask for the number? Makes more sense?
mattyanon Admin 2y ago
Don't ask what she likes. Enthuse about something awesome, then invite her, then get number.
I'm not sure that visiting a museum is going to get her dripping though.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
I get most of my dates from going to country dance venues, I do approaches to dance, but for practical purposes, I don't know what difference in success rate there is between my venue of choice and wherever you are cold approaching, but here's my input:
Are you setting up plans like coffee first or something before getting the number? Getting a number in of itself doesn't matter at all, women will hand out their number like candy. Getting agreement to plans beforehand is a huge difference, you'll instantly know 90% of uninterested girls because they'll say no before the number.
Look up "tend and befriend" it's the female version of fight or flight, and explains why a woman will chat with you for almost an hour only to ghost when she is behind a phone screen with no possibility that she can face physical backlash in person.
It's primal instinct for women, even if you pose no actual threat. Evolutionarily speaking, she doesn't know if you're safe or not when first meeting you and without enough time to get to know you, and will act one way in front of your face and another when the risk is zero.
I think I've gotten a couple of flakes so far with this approach, but there were valid logistical impossibilities to overcome and they were both from out of state visiting friend or religious family
Also, I know Bang and Day Bang by Roosh V are no longer in production (it was hard as fuck for me to find a cheap copy) but he makes the point that the best sign of interest a woman can give is if she is asking you personal questions.
Women can chat for an hour and have no interest in you, but if she's asking personal questions, you know she's assessing you on a level greater than small talk. He recommends not going for the number until you receive personal questions from her