Hello everyone,
There is not much to rant about my LTR actually. I just wanted to ask for some advice of framing. I'll get down to the details.
I have been a student of RP for about a year and a half now. I've been dating my LTR for about 9 months. The relationship started off as a FWB thing and things started to really progress after she shown me she was capable of being my girlfriend. Alot of green flags, little red flags.
I'm 25, She's 23. My N-Count is 46, if that matters. I lift 4 - 5 times and I've always been in good shape. I've been maintaining a good frame. Always confident, cocky, charming. Never have I shown jealousy or any type of mate-guarding behaviors to her. Although I do know about dread game, I don't think I've actually applied it to my LTR. I never really saw the reason to. Sex is still mindblowing, always better than the last and her squirting out a lake everytime. I am an extremely busy person (own financing company) and she is extremely compliant and submissive. Always looking out to make my daily life a little better (bringing food to work, washing my clothes, changing my bedsheets). Things are fucking dandy.
Now, the frame. Ever since the past few months, I've grown very fond of her. I have massive fucking oneitis. I can feel myself getting insecure about myself and scared I am going to lose frame although I've never lost it. I can feel myself getting a bit more protective of her. The quote "She was never yours, it was just your turn" truly is starting to scare me with this girl. What do i do brothers? No matter how much I keep ignoring these insecurities, they keep coming back. and I know that if my internal game is getting weaker, my external game is going to be affected soon. How do I keep my internal game strong? Please give me all the raw advice that I need.
Best, SavingsParamedics
whytehorse2021 2y ago
This is a normal phenomenon in men thanks to evolution. I escaped it by dropping all attachment to my wife. I'm socially monogamous but sexually polygamous. It's just a growing up thing. She's going to die. Everybody does. By being attached you are setting yourself up to suffer. When we say it's your turn, we literally mean that, whether you mate for life and then die or spend one night together. This is called outcome independence. You need to have yourself as your mental point of origin.
pfeilmacher 2y ago
What do you want out of this? Are you both exclusive?
SavingsParamedics 2y ago
Yes we are exclusive. I want this relationship to last.
Intrepid_Place53900 2y ago
do you want this LTR to work? You are only in about 9 months, yes, it may seem like forever for you young guys but it's nothing. wait till it's 2 years or whatever. The longer it goes, the harder it is to maintain frame, to not have lost it at points,etc.
If you want a LTR and continue it, go read the marriedredpill reddit. Those are guys who are in very long LTR or married,etc and they have to make it work because of kids usually. Now that's hard shit. So, go read that and see what they have to do.
Yes, it's just your turn, don't ever forget that. She's probably been plowed by bigger better looking guys than you, whatever. Who cares. Just do your thing. If she's really into you, which it seems like, she will actually help you maintain frame, and/or ignore it when you loose it from time to time.
that's something to look for, does she actually want you to "win"? She wants to keep you, that's rare to find, that's a girl who gets it. So stop getting nervous and do what you been doing. do your stuff, make yourself a better version of you and fuck her like there's no tomorrow.
SavingsParamedics 2y ago
I want this LTR to work. I am also a lurker at marriedredpill even though I'm only 25 lol, they have some great stuff on LTR. She supports me in everything I do. Shit tests are very minimal with this one.
This is reassuring. Appreciate the response. I will do my best and become the best version of myself, for myself. She can either continue to support me like she does or get left behind.
Intrepid_Place53900 2y ago
This is the way.
hannulv 2y ago
All girls are wired to wear you down and enslave you. Few are the men that keep their women submissive, especially after babies, etc.
Frame isn't about not having feelings for a girl. It's OK to really dig and enjoy a girl and love the way she adds value to your life. It's even OK to want to be exclusive. Here is what you need to know. 9 months is not an LTR. An LTR is 5+ years. Why? Because 5 years is the point where all of the love-drunk bonding chemicals stop flowing. After 5 years, a sexual relationship is fully dependent on the male to sexually arouse and inspire the relationship.
Between 3 to 5 years most lesbian relationships experience Lesbian Bed Death. Girls on their own become dead bedrooms. Most lesbian relationship last 5 years or less.
In order to have a Frame moving forward, you need a few things:
If there's anything at all that you're afraid to ask her because she might leave, then you are in her frame. If you're afraid to ask her for anal, or a threesome, or to skip ladies night, then she already owns you. If you're afraid of doing something that you want, putting her second, or seriously anything, then you are essentially already fucked.
When you're hitting your peak at 35-45, she will be hitting the wall at 33-43. You will be able to pull hot 25 year-olds, and she will be able to pull hot 55 year olds. The most likely outcome is that your relationship goes to hell in 4 years and she goes baby crazy at the same time. If you're in her frame, you will give her the baby and things will deteriorate from there. The only way this works is if you're always willing to say no, always willing to walk away, maintain focus on building yourself, and you never let yourself go soft or stop gaming.
SavingsParamedics 2y ago
Great response. Currently, I am in frame. I don't think I will ever be scared of doing my own thing or asking her what I want from her. We are already looking for a third for a threesome!
Thanks for the advice and hard reminder. Much appreciated brother.
coolsocks00 1 2y ago
You may already be aware but, even in an exclusive LTR you should strive for a true abundance of other good sexual options. And know that even though your girl is great, there are many more like her. Oneitis by the definition i know is not good even in a LTR.