Ask for separate bills?

First, don't trip on the fact that you spent $33 bucks on a date. Everybody's giving you shit because of that, but everyone in this thread also went through or is currently going what you are going through on the low. Don't bow down to anyone in this subreddit. Dont be bitter, be better.

We all spend money on women, the key, of course, is not to do it extravagantly with multiple women without any rewards.

I'll try to bring a different perspective here:

Realize this : Most women are broke as fuck, especially if they're under 30. They usually make less than what we do on average, and they aren't as dominate or successful in careers as us. Fortunately for them, they also have society telling them that "a woman doesn't have to pay, it's the man's job" and they stick by this notion HARD. If you want DIMES, they are usually going to stick to their guns, especially when they don't know shit about you and can walk.

Sure, some will split the bill with you, but ask yourself what percentage of women will fall into that category or if you can bet on it being consistent.

It's sucks, yes, but truth be told, quality women have options. For every "split the bill or GTFO, you're not worthy!!" guy, there's a dozen men lined up behind him that'll pay that measly 33 bucks to keep the momentum going.

You know what's worse? Realistically, some of these guys even have personality and game that can match or exceed yours. Don't get it twisted with RP theory. It's not all or nothing -- all men who pay for shit are not betas. Some of em are beta bucks, sure, but some of em get serious ASS while you go home alone because some random man on the internet (who may or may not be successful with women) told you to not be a "cheap beta" from his keyboard.

So how do you compete with men who will pay? How do you save money? If you're dating multiple women, stop trying to impress with the venue choice. NO expensive places and NO planning extravagant events that's going to rape your pockets. Remember, you are LEADING, you DONT HAVE to go to place where you spend crazy money.

Not paying excessively for shit does not equal a lame date. Do the research, there's cheap events everywhere. Get creative. I once took a chick to browse a couple of apartments with me and bought a six pack on the way home to drink while we watched a movie. Imagine the banter built in. Total spent, 8 bucks. Art shows, festivals, friends events. I pay very little.

But if you like to drink with a new chick in public, (I do, occasionally) do two things: 1) go out alone and build rapport with owners/bartenders/bouncers of the places you frequent. I don't drink much, but I usually have discounts added to my bill every time I go to my favorite bars in the city if I'm alone and especially if I'm on a date.

2) Go to dive bars. They're the GOAT first date spot, if your girl isn't lame. They're much more interesting than the typical bar, the drinks are stronger and best of all, it's cheap. That $33 bucks of yours could be three dates with three different women at a dive bar for me.

I subscribe to the belief that the answer for these type of situations is always in the middle. Don't hemorrhage money with women you're not fucking, ($60+ dinner&drinks) but don't be cheap either. (asking to split 15-25 bucks at a coffee shop/cityevent/divebar)

$33 bucks every other week or so should not break you. If it does, then you need to focus more on building your checking account than dating. In summation, Don't spend frivolously with women you don't know, just go for cheap events and pay the freakin twenty bucks. I rather not argue about such a cheap bill.

I would much rather focus on ASS, but that's just how I roll, personally.

Paying for shit is the quickest way to sabotage your attractiveness. The problem is that you live in a culture (the US, I suspect) where there is an expectation of you paying for drinks, and setting up a date in a place where the issue arises puts you in the situation you are expected to pay, so the damage is done even before you have to open your wallet. As an aside, this does not happen here in France: most women don't expect men to pay for them, and will actually refuse it because it's considered quite whorish.

The solution is simply not to put yourself in that situation, don't set up first dates in bar or restaurants. And if you absolutely must, make it explicit beforehand, though without bean counting awkwardness: "you buy the drinks, I'll pay for the food." Even if the food is more expensive, at least she's bought you drinks so you're not a sucker in her mind.

Last night drinks cost me $33 and I didn't even get a kiss.

Stop buying shit for women who haven't earned it.

You have to be willing to accept being called an asshole and never seeing her again. Once you learn to live with that, you can tell her she's paying for her shit and not give a fuck what she says or does to get out of it.

If she's worth your time she'll happily split the bill. If she gets upset you know it's better that you avoid her.

Forget subtle. Brash cocky arrogant. All traits women look for in AF

Lol you got used hard. If the woman is objecting to paying it means she's just using you for free stuff. Only exception to this is hyper feminine women that marry young and don't work or have any money and stay home and cook and clean etc

But you won't meet her at a bar or club.

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Don't be subtle

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We're splitting the bill

Nope, someone beat me to it.

The fact that you even have to ask this question should be your answer.

I go on cheap dates that cost less than $5.

Telling them to split is ok, but I dont even want to be spending a lot for myself on first dates.

There are little tricks, but the biggest thing is being able to handle the looks you'll get (from everyone...your date, the bartender, the girl at the next table) when you say, "no, we're on separate checks."

Happens every time. Even get it from my close friends who know better. You just have to get over it.

I would say from the beginning even before i buy anything, "ill buy the first round, you the second" or if you guys are gonna do two separate activities like movie and dinner, then say "you get the movies and I'll get dinner?" or vice versa.

This can apply to anything. Any activity, just say that you'll pay for said activity and she'll pay for dinner or again, vice versa.

Women know the promise of sex will get them free shit. They play men constantly this way.

You are also enabling her to be, stay or become a whore.

I do not like being an asshole with women and saying out right that if I pay I expect to get sex even though I know guys that do this.

You can be direct as others have suggested or you can finesse it if you are not ready to be this direct.

I personally would feel like a loser if I had to pay for a woman's company. It immediately states that they are more valuable than I am as to what each brings to the relationship and puts a guy at a disadvantage because than you will always pay one way or another.

What I say up front is this. I know men often pay expecting sex and I never want a woman to feel like I see her as a prostitute or that I'm manipulating her through the money I spend on her.

Identify how other people are fucked up and you do not want to be like them and also that you know she is above all that as well.

Use her need to have a good opinion of herself to your advantage.

You will know you have arrived when women start buying you shit.

Avoid the bill altogether and meet at your place