I’ll went on three dates with this girl and didnt have sex due to bad logistics.
After 2nd and 3rd date she texted me asking me to go out again.
I just moved back home and have a sick family member and my siblings are home as well for the surgery. I was honestly planning to take a break from dating after fucking 7girls in 3 months but ended up actually having a lot in common with this girl. She paid for our 2nd date too.
I invited her over after second date a couple days later but she had tickets for an event and she later told me should would have came if she had known i meant earlier.
Anyways 3rd date my dad had surgery the next day but I went on the date because it ended up getting postponed and knew id be busy later. Date ended all good we kissed a little like after every date but I could tell she wanted me to escalate and tbh I had too many things on my mind and logistics were shit.
Texted her next day no response. She is away at a family thing all wknd but still its been 2 days so im figuring im cooked. Any way to recover? I think im done with dating for a bit after this to focus on other things so I dont really want to pursue another girl.
Red_dead Should i (x1) 17h ago
To answer my question the obvious answer is to pursue other women and that I didn’t escalate and she thinks im a pussy now.
MentORPHEUS Senior Endorsed 14h ago
This is the sort of overthinking I referenced above. Don't assign these thoughts to her without actually even talking to her again. Right now, this notion that she's already conclusively written you off as a pussy, 100 percent originated in your mind, and zero evidence that it even came up st all in hers.
Red_dead Should i (x1) 59m ago
I feel you. Its like ptsd I psych myself out and start making mistakes. I’ll try to take a more positive frame.
MrSupreme 4m ago
Interesting inner game concept. I've thought the same when guys can't get over her past boyfriends, or current other guys she may or may not be talking to/fucking (assuming the girl is just a plate and not a LTR). It is effectively self-cuckoldry. Hypergamy is natural, those thoughts are a choice.
Musicgoon78 3 15h ago
Those who hesitate, masturbate.....
You only get so many shot to escalate before you look weak. Usually a good make out means sex is next on the list.
Leave the door open for her to reach out, but don't count on it. It may happen, but she needs to initiate, not you.
No more of these excuses bro. You can bang out a quickie, finger pop her, get a handjob or even play just the tip for a bit and then give it a "to be continued"...
At any rate, you might have to accept that this is torched.
Red_dead Should i (x1) 56m ago
Very true, I knew I could do it to wasn’t even pussy just I struggle between outcome depence and escalation. Ive lost girls to both trying to hard (were they feel i only want sex) and trying to little so im trying to find a balance.
MentORPHEUS Senior Endorsed 14h ago
Remember, looking and acting too thirsty isn't good for your internal mindset. It also doesn't come off as attractive to your prospect.
Don't mentally write it off, but also don't overthink the situation while she's away
After the weekend winds down, look at your schedule and reach out to her with say 2 or 3 options in mind when you have time, and casually float the idea of getting together again soon. This doesn't appear thirsty or desperate, but rather engages her with an opening to either reciprocate interest, or telegraph a lack thereof, without a sense of putting her on the spot.
Red_dead Should i (x1) 56m ago
Will do thank you.
First-light 1 9h ago
No on ever knows what is going on on her side but if she is not going to be a bit understanding over your preoccupation with your dad and give you another shot when its all settled, well, she isn't worth it, is she so no loss if you can't recover her.
On the other hand who knows what is on at her end. She might just know you are not really available and be thinking elsewhere for a bit while with her family. You can't tell but definitely don't count her out, just relax and don't worry. You are not a scarcity guy anyway as you track record shows.
JPCantell 4h ago
You shouldn’t give a shit and should be on to the next bitch.
But you’re not, instead you’re worried about ‘recovering’ this chance with your precious oneitis.
mattyanon Admin 2h ago
Inivite her over to YOUR PLACE.
Red_dead Should i (x1) 55m ago
Honestly what I was thinking my siblings are currently staying with me tho is the problem
Mountainman 1h ago
The fact that you got her on 3 dates is more impressive to me than if you were to close. I can close but seeing a chick again is like a 25% chance
Red_dead Should i (x1) 53m ago
Honestly Ive been there it was learning from mistakes and tweaking little things that helped a lot, greatly increased my success.