You know you need to lift. You know you need to eat right. You know you need to feel and look better. But, allow me to shed light and a story on a reason to lift that is sometimes over looked in this community.
Background
I have been lifting for almost 11 years, long before TRP, and paying attention to my diet for the last 7. For perspective, I am 6’, 215 lbs at about 14% bf – this varies due to inconsistency. I still believe I could look bigger than I do (and probably will forever), but people compliment my physique often enough for me to know that I am far above average; more importantly, it is a part of my presence.
Body
Last weekend, I went to a reggae festival with my roommate and had a great time. We were about 50 feet from the stage and dead center. Visually, it is a great spot to be, but physically, it is likely people moving forward, back, left, or right will bump you every 5 minutes. Not a big deal, but could become annoying if you fixate on it.
A couple minutes after realizing this pattern, I feel a hand on my back. I slowly turn around and make eye contact with a man trying to get by. He looked nervous and in a weak, crackly, BB tone said, “Excuse me.”
Acknowledging his anxiety, I reply with a smile, “No worries, that’s what happens up here.” To which he smiles and rambles something along the lines of, “Oh thanks. I almost did not ask. I was thinking, ‘this guy is so big. I don’t want to piss him off.’” I brushed off this compliment and told him I respected him asking.
THEN, he stuck out his hand for a fist bump.
Conclusion
Years of lifting and dieting (mixed with posture) creates an aura of respect around you. You carry this aura everywhere you go. This aura is why TRP tells you to lift. This aura commands respect before you open your mouth. This aura establishes your initial presence in a room. This is all because we are always sizing up the people around us – always.
Narcopath 5y ago
I'm 6'4 and been blessed with unearthly Greek God genetics which have only showed when I used to do tracks when I was 14-15-16 and I vaguely recall having people get impressed at how I looked but I didn't quite get it back then. My unhealthy lifestyle's turned me into a twig and shat all over said genetics (I know, ungrateful of me.) but I've been eating right for close to two months now so I can go in the gym and not pass out. Today's the final first day in. Here we go, dudes.
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
Congrats. Remember to always compare yourself to who you were yesterday.
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[deleted] 5y ago
Until I was 22 I was always 125lb. After doing progressive overload I went up to 155lb and got more muscle mass. Since May of this year I’ve been doing stronglifts and the difference I’ve seen in body change is insurmountable. My wife can’t keep her hands off me now and she has got some serious mate guarding going on. What makes it so wild to believe is I’ve only just begun. It makes me wonder how wild my wife is going to be when she sees me at 190lb. I’ve never had issues with having sex from the wife but now I can’t get her off me. Lifting is absolutely fundamental to being a high SMV man.
NightwingTRP 5y ago
How do you rule out any impact of height or game in this?
jay_jay_man 5y ago
I'm 5'3, the difference between when I was 105 pounds with the build of a frail school compare to when I was 140 pounds, most muscle is night and day. The response from society was overwhelmingly positive. The sex response I experienced with women was drastically improved.
Lifting won't get me the same attention as a 6'2" comparable dude who lifts but my life is still much improved!
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iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
That’s all part of the equation, but this interaction wouldn’t happen if I was a) 6’ 230 @ 35% or b) 6’ 160 @ 12%.
Certainly height and frame play a role, but I’m highlighting a variable in the equation.
NightwingTRP 5y ago
From my experience, that could just be shyness... and scenario B works for some guys. The number of scrawny tall guys I've seen with attractive women despite dreadful posture and no muscle is almost offensive.
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
This post isn’t about gaming girls. It’s about the interaction with the guy giving me inherent respect from my size.
NightwingTRP 5y ago
Then my first point still stands.
Anyways, try not to get too hung up on size and muscle. You'll still die from one stab wound like anyone else. It doesn't actually provide any better defence if someone genuinely wants to truly harm you. Some self-defence stuff can, but ultimately more muscle is just an attractiveness thing.
Riftactics 5y ago
1-5% of People will ever need to actually defend themselves.
100% of people want to look good.
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
My height would add to the overall size, which I believe could be more or less 90% of the reason he was nervous, but game wouldn’t have any influence with a guy in this short of interaction - or so I believe.
I see it as more than that, such as initial respect. Unless “attractiveness” is a big blanket, which involves such things.
WhirlingDeath 5y ago
I don't know if "respect" is the right word. It's just being rational to be leery of the guy who could fuck you up if he wanted to.
I don't "respect" a pit bull more than a Chihuahua, but I do recognize the ability of the pit bull to inflict damage.
If I'm in a situation where I have an easy escape, I'm not scared of a bigger guy because I'm quicker than him. If I'm carrying a gun, also not scared because I can shoot him if he tries something.
A festival would definitely be a place I'd be leery. A bunch of fucked up people concentrated in one area. Knowing people could potentially get away with stuff in all the chaos. Sounds like hell.
BurnoutRS 5y ago
When you get up in the morning and it feels fucking amazing to stretch, when there are hardly any aches or pains and if there are you know exactly how to fix them, when almost every movement is effortless, when you no longer need to question your ability before trying to lift, jump, vault, push, carry or smash, when you can run for miles without stopping
I cant believe I was skeptical that exercise would help lift my mood. No shit lifting helps with anxiety, how the fuck can you be a timid little bitch when you know you can smash pretty much anything that comes at you?
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BurnoutRS 5y ago
You need to stretch my friend. On average I spend about 20-30 minutes before and after my workouts working through a variety of stretches, yoga poses, essentrics motions, tai chi whatever. Ive got a brain and spinal cord injury from a car accident 2 years ago, in addition to nerve damage in my neck and shoulders. If I dont stay consistent with training flexibility and stretching, all my aches and pains come back
I also try to do light workouts on my off days when im not lifting. Light in the sense that its all bodyweight stuff but you can get really intense with holding different poses for extended periods of time or really pushing the limits of how far you can stretch. Climbing and hanging off of things can be great for stretching out your back. Try touching the floor without bending knees. Work from the tips of your fingers, then knuckle by knuckle, I can put my palms flat on the ground now.
Start by looking up exercises for the areas you feel the most stiffness and then keep going until you figure out a routine that keeps you from feeling stiff and sore all the time. If youre new to lifting expect a lot of soreness as your body gets accustomed to exerting itself in ways it hasnt before. Everything Ive said is more for correcting pains from injury, shitty posture, years of hard work etc.
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
The previous weekend, I was hungover, limping into the diner, and a stranger calls out to me, “Hey! Could you help me push my car!?”
It was on an incline of about 5% and it was a small compact car. I’m in slides.
I’ve never wanted to do something less. However, I decided to help. I believe I helped out of a mix of, I’d like to think, genuine kindness, but also pride. The pride of showing the group and this stranger I could push a damn car. Great feeling.
Flintblood 5y ago
I don't know. I've seen plenty of very extroverted skinny dudes and flabby dudes. Lifting is known to help overall mood though and depression, memory, and the confidence boost and release and focus on a goal helps those who are in the ruminations trap.
BurnoutRS 5y ago
wtf are you on about? I didnt say shit about people with natural confidence. Im talking about people who are lacking in confidence gaining it through finding strength.
Of course there are flabby and skinny dudes who are able to put themselves out there. If being jacked was the only means of attaining confidence and quashing anxiety then our society would be seriously fucked.
Addendum: Its worth noting there are two kinds of lifters, those who do so out of self love and those who do so out of self loathing. I was the latter before becoming the former and in some ways my mentality of not being good enough and needing to push more and more sapped my confidence. As I pushed through that, however, I began to become impressed with my dedication, resiliance, the ability that I had. I could see potential in myself again.
Thats the seat of true confidence. When you have unwaivering faith in your propensity to learn and do. I stand by my earlier point though, if you push to the point that I have, starting from a place of low self esteem I dont see any other outcome besides developing an increased awareness of your own ability
Flintblood 5y ago
Wow dude. Come down now. I think I misunderstood the point you were trying to make. It seemed like you were suggesting that only lifting could bring confidence.
[deleted] 5y ago
This is really encouraging. I lift and I'm about 10-12% body fat. I'm about 5'9 and my weight is relative to my height. I want to get bigger and your post has encouraged me to keep going.
Question for you while I'm writing this, have you ever taken gear and if you have is it as bad as people make it out to be?
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t thought about it. Luckily, I do know people who have and it’s not worth it.
Idk how old you are, but you’re crazy if you do it before 25. I MIGHT do TRT once I’m 30ish, but even then, I’ve read articles that suggest testosterone doesn’t decline with age.
Do A LOT of research before you put anything foreign in your body and get professional medical advice. You can raise your T levels naturally pretty easily if you know what supps to take.
officerkondo 5y ago
Which articles are those, because it absolutely does.
You can only think this if you believe supplement advertisers. If you want to raise your testosterone levels an appreciate degree, it's a needle or nothing.
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nester79 5y ago
I don't understand why most men didn't start lifting in high school. Didn't you all do sports that encouraged going to the gym?
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
Sports is what got me into lifting. I attribute the beginning of my physique to that, but sheesh was my diet awful.
WarViper1337 5y ago
I lifted a bit in high school but back then I had moderate asthma that made exercise pretty tough and I made virtually no gains. They just didn't have the good long lasting asthma control meds back then. Now it is vastly different. The new long lasting meds allow me to exercise like a normal person.
Work_In_Progress92 5y ago
I definitely see this as a thing. I've been going to the gym hard now for the past 8 months, more and more of the regulars there come up and talk to me.
Great people for the most part. Don't even need to ask some random for a spot anymore. Lifting and the results from lifting are astounding.
rmandan 5y ago
Reggae is consistently the number one genre no matter the mood.
magx01 5y ago
Technical death metal for me but it's all a drug high at the end of the day; it feels great and inspirational no matter the source/gene.Enjoy your reggae mahn.
ApexmanRP 5y ago
I get what you are trying to say here, but I think you have it about face a bit.
That isn't really respect its just someone smaller than you being a bit wary of you and being a total beta.
I am not as big as you (6'1 200lbs bf 16%) but often get bigger guys talking to me in a respectful way, mainly I think because I am generally much older and they cast believe someone my age is in good shape.
But also because when I am in a bar or where ever, I will actively engage these guys in a friendly fun way. I often get guys coming up to me and fist bumping me for apparently no reason.
I don't let their size intimidate me, and they like that.. we communicate on a level, as you should do.
Sylvester_Sterone 5y ago
Very true. It's amazing how you feel you can always do better but the compliments keep rolling in. I supervise preschool teachers and whenever I walk in the little ones start flexing their biceps. When a fire captain was giving a demonstration he stated "look, my bodyguard is here" to the kiddos.
ThatOneDrunkUncle 5y ago
You gonna redpill the kids?
Sylvester_Sterone 5y ago
To become the best version of themselves... I tell em to hang on the monkeybars every day and read a book.
magx01 5y ago
.......'Round here schools are removing existing playgrounds due to "safety concerns" and not building them at the new schools for the same reason.
:(
Sylvester_Sterone 5y ago
I thought "Peanut Allergies" was crazy enough.
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[deleted] 5y ago
I get this aura sometimes. When I have had a breakthrough in my morning meditation (I spend most of my days purging old emotions and meditation is bleak) I walk around like I am king of the jungle. I am pretty heavily obese...but 6'8. Inner power seems to give you external power.
Edit: Going to start lifting soon. I am the same height as the Mountain in GoT so there's my potential...
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WhiteGhosts 5y ago
i agree
been lifting for a few months and as i make progression, i slowly realize people behave slightly different than before. people tend to look at me a few seconds longer than normal lol.
newName543456 5y ago
Being imposing without need to be violent is the place to be.
Mr_Badass 5y ago
This is a great benefit. Also, women who are strangers tend to be friendlier.
blackswans042 5y ago
I agree, and combined with some martial arts, preferably MMA, it will give you confidence even more l
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
Completely agree. Many good write ups on TRP about this. I’ve been working on my own additions to this theory to gain deeper articulation for this sub.
[deleted] 5y ago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8H4GKg-mYQ
WarViper1337 5y ago
I finally got off my ass this year and decided to make some changes in my life. I have been seriously lifting for the past 4 months and I am finally seeing results. Today was the first day I got some compliments on my progress from a co-worker when they mentioned that it was noticeable that my arms, shoulders, and chest are all getting bigger. It was a huge confidence boost to know that other people finally notice and I can't wait until this work week is over so I can get my ass back into the gym.
Edit: I work in an ER. Not long after writing the above post we had a car pull up with a 100% unresponsive patient in the back seat. The nurse and I ran out to find the person laying on their significant others lap. Extracting an unconscious human from a car can be a pain the ass but luckily this person was a light weight at around 120 pounds. My hesitation was that this is gonna hurt my back later. Anyway after dead lifting this person from the back seat and into a wheel chair I was totally fine. Zero pain and not even a hint of exhaustion. In the end everything turned out fine with this person and they made a full recovery. Just one more thing to convince me to continue on my journey of lifting weights.
DirtJellyBeanz 5y ago
You know what REALLY helped my gains, doing 5x5 strong lifts for about 4-5 months... after I did mega amounts of calisthenics it was amazing.
Locoboy713 5y ago
Good stuff dude, it takes about 3-4 months to see some progress and enjoy the journey. Don't fall for the instant gratification shit, and keep improving this for yourself. Be consistent & discipline with your workouts and diet, you will be a different person a year from now. It's a lifestyle and keep us apart from the rest. Cheers.... protein shake.
cryptoto1 5y ago
Yup, I know the feeling buddy. That's all it takes, your first compliment on your phisique, and now you're hooked for life.
aigamithite 5y ago
If you turn with your feet and not your hips even at lumbar flexion you're fine - in case you need to do that again.
WarViper1337 5y ago
Yep that's what I did. I had one of those lame training videos about properly lifting patients playing in the back of my mind while doing it lol.
crapslock 5y ago
Feels great when that happens. If you stick with it you might get the coveted golden compliment by being accused of juicing. Lol.
ThatGuyIam123 5y ago
I overheard an engineer that works for me talking to a drafter about me - I heard one word - "steroids?" Hehehehe
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
I’ve gotten this by just mentioning my stats before. Always an ego boost.
Iwannachokekatie 5y ago
I've gotten that not because of my physique, but because I'm almost gorilla tier hairy. Not much of an ego boost there.
animal_one 5y ago
I'm 6'4. I went from 141lbs at 19 yo to 213 lbs ten years later (currently sitting at about 190). I can't imagine anything else giving me greater respect from the general public, short of becoming a celebrity, than lifting has. Getting big has changed my life.
randomusername7725 5y ago
Ur already big lmao 6'4
That's step one natural chad material.
MarcosDomingues 5y ago
Lifting doesn't even make you stand out that much anymore. Most people go to some kind of gym, and it's not that uncommon to see jacked dudes tbh.
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
Lifting doesn’t make you stand out, big muscles make you stand out. Its all about your environment. That’s why “alpha” and “beta” are relative.
MarcosDomingues 5y ago
When I go shopping or to an airport, which are places full of people, many many guys do look like they lift.
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
It could be confirmation bias, but even if it isn’t, this should give you more of a reason to lift. The competition is increasing.
Locoboy713 5y ago
Lifting get us attention from the girls, but even more from the brossss. lol
A TSA agent at Phoenix airport told me that it's illegal to carry those guns, made my day.
welfrkid 5y ago
had a guy tell me from across the street he could see my lats through my jacket and asked for advice
Locoboy713 5y ago
Do you know a good veterinarian? My calfs are sick
[deleted] 5y ago
I bet he says this to all the boys.
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iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
I’ve never thought about this, but it’s so true.
I notice, unless it’s brought up in banter, girls usually don’t mention my muscles until after sex.
velinxs 5y ago
They may not talk about it but if you follow their eyes.
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[deleted] 5y ago
I'm pretty short so i feel like lifting is pointless for me, i feel like my effort would be better suited to cardio and calisthenics.
Throwaway-242424 5y ago
If anything you should be lifting even more because you can't just heightmogg people.
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Morphs_ 5y ago
When I started getting more muscular, the change in behavior of other people towards me was astounding. Strangers would treat me differently.
It seems like this is hard-wired. As I'm a dancing teacher I often visit elementary schools to teach kids. Even the girls around age 8-9 are already impressed with big manly arms. "sir, can you flex your arm?" and when I do that with a smile, they go "ohhh!". Yesterday as I walked into the school I even heard a girl say "what a hunk!". Made me laugh, she probably doesn't even know what a hunk is yet but it still illustrates my point. LIFT.
crapslock 5y ago
Yea, but how much ya benchinng?
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
I bench /u/crapslock ’s max +5 lbs
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crapslock 5y ago
I was trying to make a joke that I only bench a laughable 200. lol
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frankduxing 5y ago
While I agree that having big muscles will create a dominant aura, it can also radiate a negative one. Besides the obvious benefits of health and maintaining high testosterone levels, wouldn't it be equally if not more beneficial to put time into the thing sitting inside your skull? Imagine what kind of confident aura you can radiate when you know and understand yourself and the world you live in.
Sylvester_Sterone 5y ago
Exactly. I joined Toast Masters to deal with getting up and giving speeches. Also, there is a section where a person calls on random people to give a 1 minute speech about a random topic. It's kind of like shit test training.
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
It’s not binary. Just because I lift, doesn’t mean I don’t read or meditate.
frankduxing 5y ago
The problem is time is not endless and priorities have to be made. The way you talk about lifting and the ego boost you are indicating you get when intimidating someone gives a fairly clear picture of where you priorities are.
From my experience, women do not share this prioritization when selecting men nor does the modern world.
endertheend 5y ago
You talk too much.
Lift more.
Post less.
Reynaldo7 5y ago
So youre saying they prefer puny bookworms?
frankduxing 5y ago
They prefer men that understand the world and themselves. Bookworms are not this, bookworms understand books.
Muscles, money, and cars have been the posterboy of bros since like 1981, its never going to get you that top quality life or top quality woman - more like a bimbo gold digger with fake tits.
iSwallowedTRP 5y ago
You need to read the sidebar.
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Reynaldo7 5y ago
You knew what i meant by bookworms, stop trying to be a smartass. We can tell youre new here. Stay if you wish but read the sidebar and lift.
frankduxing 5y ago
Who said I don't lift weights?
nester79 5y ago
You can have muscles, money and cars and still be intelligent and get a quality woman. I've been lifting since high school and do triathlons and extreme skiing regularly but I also happen to be a trauma surgeon with two fast and exciting cars.
My wife is an accomplished concert musician and the women I've dated on the side are all pretty cool too.
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frankduxing 5y ago
The point wasn't that you can't have these things and get women it was just that these things alone won't get you women and other things are more important as priorities.
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whuttupfoo 5y ago
We aren't on the same boat. My boat is bigger than yours.