Considering it appears to be a goal for most, the topic of LTR's doesn't come up nearly enough. A quick trip over to askTRP and it's pretty clear that this is where most men struggle and end up suffering the most.
I've been asked on too many separate occasions,
What is the best way to go about getting a good LTR?
My answer is always the same: You don't.
The red pill toolbox is least effective being used for Blue Pill goals. The desire to fill the role is what leads to sub standard relationships.
An LTR is a byproduct, an organic progression. You can only be open to the prospect of it, but to seek it is counter-productive. Some foundations should be in place first.
First and foremost is shifting the focus from our future unicorn to ourselves. To piece together a life that doesn't require the presence of a partner. One that we are happy and satisfied with regardless of her involvement. Sidebar should assist with this.
Next is to build a storage of experience. If you don't know your way around female behavior you should not even be considering being in a committed relationship. She'll chew you up and spit you out. She is not your savior. She is not the answer to your problems. If you are to derive any value and satisfaction out of your relationship you best understand and be capable of managing your women.
If you tick the first two box's then you can start thinking about selection. By selection I don't mean go out and search for her, I mean the ability to recognize a potentially LTR worthy women. They are out there, but rare. Looking for them is a pointless exercise. You have no way of knowing if a woman you meet is LTR worthy. For this reason, due process should by administered accordingly, on all your women.
How does due process work? How do you know if she's LTR worthy? How do you know when it's time to LTR?
Well, Let's say you're at the beach with a boat, it only fits two people. You're happy just mingling with all the desirable women on the beach, but you're open to taking a journey out into the ocean with only one. Your journey would start out in shallow waters and progressively get deeper. The closer to the shore you are the quicker it is to get back and pick up other women and the less invested you are in the journey.
There's a couple things that need to be clarified about this journey. You dictate where it goes. They are welcome to be a part of it, but must understand that you're the Captain. If at any point they jeopardize or no longer add value to that journey, then they'll cease to be apart of it. No exceptions, none of them are special, despite what they tell you.
Next, is that it's her job to pursue the journey. If she isn't asking about it at any point then either she's the Captain and you're the first mate, or she's getting everything she needs from you as is. It indicates that she doesn't really want to go on a journey with you. Don't take that as an invitation for you to be Mr. Initiative and whisk her deep into the Ocean. A journey you are not in control of is not a journey that serves you
One fine day you'll have your ankles in the water and you'll be ready start your journey. You'll meet a women, go on a couple dates, maybe even fuck her. It's early days, you'll still be getting a feel for each other.
She asks: Are we there Yet? No.
She's on the shore but wants a deep sea package. She's either desperate or delusional, and neither is good. She is mostly interested in her own comfort and doesn't really care what value she can add to your journey. These are most likely post wall women looking to latch on to the first provider who will have them. Do not go past ankle depth water.
If however, the first few interactions do go well and you're satisfied, then she is permitted to drift out into the shallows with you. You can take this trip with multiple women. It's short, calm, easy to cut ties and get back to the beach if you're not happy with any of them.
This may entail, casual dating, fucking and occasionally going out together. Simple, light hearted interactions. She gets no special treatment and you are indifferent to her presence. She is easily replaceable and has no emotional leverage.
They ALL start out this way, rushing to depths is dangerous.
Over time she may start showing positive signals. She may be really fun to be around. She may fuck like a beast. She may even be great conversation. This doesn't mean you've found a diamond. It simply means you're finding the shallows to be enjoyable.
She now asks: Are we there yet? Nope.
There's still no depth, you can't possibly know whether she is fit for a long-term journey. This is a more common point for a commitment request. It's understandable, but not effective. She's looking to cash in on her brief investment. However, spreading her legs a couple times doesn't quite qualify her for the position, that's simply entitlement. She needs to show you what a great candidate she is.
If she remains sweet, sexual and submissive over the next couple months, and you're having a ball, you may be willing to venture past the shallows, into deeper waters. Still in the vicinity of the shoreline and close to other women but she'll certainly be the closest to you. Nothing that can't be quickly reversed. There should still be other women on your radar.
This depth is a little more personal than before. You may start doing more activities together, going on weekends away and spending more time together in general. She may even get to meet one or two of your friends and vice versa. This is where you're paying slightly more attention to the value she's adding to your life because she's more involved in your life.
This could either prove to be more enjoyable, or more strenuous than before. If the latter, simply head back to the shallows, to which she is better suited. If it's the former and you're still liking what she brings to the table then, well, now she is showing promising.
She again asks: Are we there yet? Still No.
It's been good up until now, but you can't say with certainty that this is someone you wan't to go on a deep sea journey with. She hasn't had a trial in the deep. Depth is treating her how you would an LTR. This entails management. Her response to this will tell you all you need to know.
Inevitably, the deeper you go, the more invested in her you become. She get's more and more of your time and energy. It becomes necessary that you manage that investment. It's not such a short trip back to the shallows anymore. Puppy, employee or first mate, the better they are trained, the better they serve your journey.
She need's to be adding value to your life. You still need to be enjoying her company, sex and adventures together. The deeper you go, the more of her character will be revealed. It's for you to decide if you're liking it or not. The best candidates to support a long journey are submissive, nurturing, sweet, sexual and mentally stable. Pay attention to red flags.
If she is faltering, back to the shallows. Taking a rescue step to deep ocean will only put you both in danger. If she's flourishing, well, then your time together is proving favorable. It needs to remain positive over the course of a few months.
Finally, she asks: Are we there yet? Well, now it's up to you.
By now, you have all the necessary information to make an informed decision.
Various levels of depth will bring varying levels of fulfillment to different people. Some may enjoy their escapades on the beach, some may venture no further than the shallows. For others, after a while, the shoreline may lose it's appeal. The allure of the deep may be far more enticing. It's for each person to find out for themselves what brings them the greatest satisfaction.
Experienced sea men will always navigate the seas better, which is why due process is required. Heading into deeper waters with just one woman is a risky undertaking, one you need to be adequately prepared for. It's far easier mingling on the safety of the shore. How well you as the man Captain that journey, will determine how smooth it goes.
At some point one or both of you may tire and want to get back on the beach. That is a natural process of life. The truth about the journey is that you'll never really arrive somewhere and shout "Hey, we made it!". The journey simply has a direction you dictate, and it is ongoing. Explore the seas, revel in the adventure, make it as fulfilling as possible for yourself and have the awareness to know when the journey has run it's course.