In this post, I'll be addressing this cluster of questions that come up regularly on AskTRP and the comments: How do I become Chad? What if plate dates others? Saw plate out with another? Dropped by to visit plate and Beta Orbiter was there? Plate asked to be dropped off at BF's house? Was I Cucked by my plate? What do? Hard next? Mate guard? Freak out? Complain in AskTRP?
The underlying issue beneath each of these is, "I'm striving toward a life of abundance. How do I arrive there with the correct mindset so I recognize it and don't fuck it up?" With the right mindset, an event like bumping into a plate's orbiter or beta boyfriend isn't a tragedy, it can be a milestone toward manhood, a springboard to the next level of outcome independence and growth. The right mindset in my experience: Congratulations, you have arrived at the threshold of Chadhood.
You see, Chad isn't necessarily the guy who fucks women instead of all other men in her life. Chad is the man who fucks her despite all other men in her life. Chad has gotten to the point where replacing a plate is less work for him than fixing a broken one, so he automatically feels no incentive to overinvest, or experiences no sense of urgency if a plate threatens to leave or break.
Remember the principle She's not yours, it's just your turn? Chad is a power user of this phenomenon in the short term/FWB/Plate sector of the Sexual Marketplace.
With the wrong mindset, confronting the reality of a plate's other love interests can kick a man backwards into the despair or anger phase of his Red Pill Journey, and make him drop or lose all of his plates and set the clock back on years of progress. Your crossover to Chadhood often comes along with successfully passing a test or assuming a privilege you're not accustomed to... a power move of some sort. Be prepared to take the bolder road when opportunity strikes, and to recognize your shift of status.
By definition, plates are low-investment, low comfort/provision, nonexclusive, sex oriented relationships. A plate has one job: relatively easy access to sex for you. As long as she is fulfilling this key deliverable, you can afford to prioritize the details of her life away from you at distant second or beyond.
Higher tier relationships, such as a main GF, Mistress level side GF, or spouse in an open relationship, carry a greater level of restrictions based on levels of investment and agreed upon levels of commitment. The obvious highest being guarantee of paternity. These relationships hold certain higher expectations of exclusivity and/or disclosure. Plates are an indulgence in sex with a minimum of the type of restrictions these higher level relationships require; they are SUPPOSED to be simple, easy, unencumbered relationships. Trying to hold plates to exclusivity standards is doing it wrong and breaking the system for yourself. Don't waste your valuable time trying to micromanage the bit players in your life.
A key to managing multiple relationships is to stratify your lovers into an organized hierarchy, and treat them accordingly. This simplifies what can quickly become an overwhelming burden if you try to organize each relationship from scratch. An easy beginner plate spinning mistake is to greatly overinvest in lower tier relationships. Negotiating comfort aspects of a relationship is the woman's prerogative, so leave this to her and you'll usually find the amount she demands for sex is lower than you would expect and have offered.
My Chad epiphany came around 15 years ago; I had to feel my way to a solution unprepared, and the results were unexpected. I arrived a little early to Favorite Plate's place; it was around Christmastime and one of her Beta orbiters was there! He brought over a bunch of gifts unannounced, so she was kind of trapped, perilously balancing being polite to her steady benefactor and shooing him out in the nick of time for my arrival. It threw me off internally at first, expecting none of this and only assembling the whole story much later. However, I played it cool on the surface and just acted like I belonged there, which I did. To my surprise the outcome was the plate INCREASED her value offered to me, not just immediately after, but durably for the rest of the years we saw each other. If I had allowed myself to be rattled and lose frame in that 3-1/2 minutes before the guy made his excuses and beat a hasty retreat, I would have missed out on an abundance of good times later. I also failed to recognize it in the moment, but... I had become Chad, the guy actually fucking the woman, not the guy bringing gifts longingly to the sidelines of her life. My days of sticking on the losing side of these love geometries trying to nice guy my way into a woman's pants were over forever.
By having a roadmap in place you can navigate your growing abundance with confidence when it leads you to encounters with other men interested in the women you fuck. Counterintuitively, the power move here isn't to mount a vigorous defense or attack, it is to remain cool and above the fray.
My personal mindset and approach which yielded successes:
Accident or shit test? Underlying cause is different depending on if the meeting was innocent chance or malevolently planned. However, in both cases, a proper DGAF attitude works the outcome toward your favor.
When meeting is an honest accident, afterward your plate will most likely engage in a mad burst of mate-retention behavior uptick in the short term, and act in a much more accomodating/obedient manner toward you in the long run.
When a "chance" meeting is deliberately engineered because of emerging bratty disobedience or flouncy branch swinging, the DGAF attitude is a verbal/tactical Judo move that will deflate/deflect their attempt at social aggression, and likely leave each of them with mutual transactional remorse afterward instead of a trauma bonding victory against a mutual enemy.
To address some of the questions specifically:
How do I become Chad? Cultivate the appropriate abundance mindset for a low investment sex oriented deal. Women interested in this type of arrangement will dry up when you start showing relationship-y signs. A don't ask, don't tell environment helps keep your plates spinning freely. You know you've become Chad when women obviously have other suitors but still choose to fuck YOU. Don't wreck this handy arrangement with vestiges of Blue Pill programming and expectations.
What if my plate dates others? If she has beta orbiters or a boyfriend, be grateful for them! They are fulfilling her comfort needs, so you don't have to while you're fucking her. They are actually helping your arrangement thrive, like symbiotes. Don't be a fool and tinker with the greater ecology of your extended socio-sexual matrix as long as they're ultimately all working for you!
What do I do if I see plate with another in public or we otherwise meet? Play it cool and DFAG gracefully; if shit test you pass, if punishment or game you deflect, if accident you win greater obedience and appreciation by letting them save face instead of making any scene.
What if she wants me to drop her off at her other BF's house? IIRC someone in this situation refused and did something bitchy like want to kick her out of the car then took her home and tattled to her family, totally missing greater Machiavelli win scenarios. He could have driven her there graciously, mock threatened to kiss her blatantly out front, chide her for trying to use him for inciting drama with her good little boyfriend, and send her off with a gently cocky see you next time. This gives her a whirlwind of emotions, exactly what this kind of little drama queen craves, so this is the kind of no-cost fuel you feed that kind of ego if she's worth inviting back on your cock later. Being mad at her and trying to inflict punishment just gives her one emotion to work with, annoyance, and it won't help you get laid and isn't the best option even if you just want out at this point. Remember, exciting Chad isn't needy, broody, and sensitive; he's cocky, funny, and unpredictable with lots going on.
Isn't this cucking yourself? We are talking about plate and FWB level relationships. On this relationship tier, issues of pregnancy and paternity are null by definition. The concept of cuckolding only applies to your wife or other relationship were there's an expectation of pregnancy. If you find you're trying to apply this to your plates for some strange reason... maybe work to get your overall love life figured out more thoroughly before you try to spin plates or otherwise operate in the lower commitment levels of the SMP. The Madonna/Whore complex is a bug, not a feature.
If you aspire to live the life of Chad, walk the walk by acheiving enough success and abundance in your life to fully act the part. Chadness is a lagging indicator of success; it's not a thing you do but a synergy of effects you notice. Be ready to notice this shift in your love life as it's happening so you don't duff your game right as it's turning.