One of the main cornerstones of TRP is to be a man who leads women. It should be fairly obvious to those of you who have seriously been learning and applying TRP principles in your life that women want confident, decisive men with strong frames who aren’t afraid to lead and make decisions. This is because fundamentally they are children and cannot think term long term or as logically as men. Once you know this you’ll see the antithesis of these men everywhere. This has been happening to me more and more frequently over the last month.
The majority of men that I am surrounded by in my daily life, personally and socially are all really tough guys. Most are former military or are simply older guys who’ve earned their stripes and are just tough as nails. Except when it comes to women. When it comes to women, these men cave in a flat second. They DEER. They never DARE. They put women up on the pedestal. Verbal and situational subservience. Apologizing, explaining themselves.
What really irks me is the seemingly culturally encouraged proclivity to defer all decisions and leadership to their wife or girlfriend. It drives me nuts.
Asking the wife what she wants to eat. Asking the wife what they should do about a problem. Asking the wife for permission to do X or Y.
I’ve seen the sad pitiful attempts to climb out of the blue pilled ideological pit of female deference and the rebellions are quickly extinguished.
What bothers me the most is the collective sadness of the women who interact with these men on a personal or social level. They’re all craving the presence of strong decisive men and there just aren’t any. I pity these women. When all the men around you are unknowingly but willingly communicating to women that they’re low SMV men, it’s very easy to stand out. It’s not even a challenge any more. It’s like these women haven’t had a man challenge them in so long that simply hearing the word “No”makes them cum instantly.
It’s a very eye opening experience and only serves to reinforce to myself that women will become unhappy if they are not led with a strong guiding hand and decisive leadership from a man. Women resent men who do not lead. They will work to sabotage relationships if they are the ones left to be in charge. That the goal is to ultimately be taking the place of her father. It’s also a really good feeling to be able to lead a woman once you get past the initial awkwardness of doing it.
Lessons Reinforced:
- Women are children.
- Women want to be led.
- Leading and deciding is a mans job.
- A man is responsible for the behavior of his woman. A woman behaving badly is the sign of a man who is not in control of his ship.
- You don’t have to be be a 10 on the smv chart to get laid. The competition is fairly non-existent.
Blows me away how much it all makes sense once you take the pill.
Edit: formatting
_do_not_read_this_ 5y ago
A few times I've casually discussed "relationships" with women, and I always make a point to tell them how I ask women out (lowers my voice and slowly says, "I'd like to hear more about [xyz], meet me for a drink Thursday, 6:30 at [location]) (women love that one), how I always lead and how women like to be led, you know, all that stuff. More Deida relationship stuff than Red Pill.
They literally smile, flush and stand there just nodding their heads.
Happened more than once. None of them were prospects though.
Dreamerboy112 5y ago
I get your point but "A man is responsible for the behavior of his woman. A woman behaving badly is the sign of a man who is not in control of his ship." sounds a lot like Islamic radicalism in my book.
Demiurge_Decline 5y ago
This is true. Sorry it took me quiet a while to fully grasp this concept. LTR's eventually show you these truths. The moment I began to understand that the woman I am with is a child mentally and emotionally, it helped me with some frustration I had with decisions she'd make.
This also helped me to realize that I am the ONLY adult. This is why women dont take responsibility. Why they make horrible bosses. Fight with each other like toddlers on the playground. Need validation from their social circle...The red pills frustration can be summed up as; "At one time we believed that men and women were equal but somehow women were still better..."
But deep down they know the truth. Have you ever heard a man say or act as if he needs a woman? Nope, maybe a vagina. Not a woman. But women view weddings and relationships, boyfriends as assets. There only talent or desire is to attach themselves to a winner, Not to win. A provider. Not to provide. A game changer. Not to change themselves.
They understand on an intuitive level that they dont supposed to have responsibility anyway. That evolution occurs in the sperm not in the egg:
​
Men continue to make sperm thus sperm is a snapshot of the development of the man at the time. Your triumphs, your desires, faults, talents, development, needs, etc. Your boy likes sports right? Why? Your daughter is unusually attached to hiking- the same sport you loved while she was conceived. Your son's IQ is high right? Perhaps because at that point, you were at your highest mental state at conception and it was "burned" into your sperm...
​
Yet, a woman is born with her eggs........ Thats your answer. You can evolve. She was born AS...
​
BUT... How was her dad when she was conceived????
​
Back to the rant...
They want to have fun, spend money, try to control you because you are their sustenance, all the while attempting to negate rules just to see if they can. What does that sound like to you? A child or an adult. Add in cattiness, remove honor and commitment, intellect and logic and this is what you have here folks.
Accept it. No exceptions.
[deleted]
InfectReality 5y ago
I always love guys that allow the silent treatment to work on them. Grocery stores, mall, sporting goods store, etc. "Can we just talk about this? Tell me what's wrong? Please, come on I'm sorry.".
Holy Christ just rub one out you retards.
friendlynaboureeno 5y ago
I totally agree, I have friends that ask those stupid questions "what do you want from me?" "what do you wanna eat for dinner" "what do you want me to do for you" "can I go out and do this"?
fuck I wanna slap them so bad!
If Im talking to a babe, and she starts acting like a bitch, I usually just call her out on it in a joking way, unless I know shes a total bitch and wouldnt give up her pussy to any guy, unless you were filthy rich.
Just gotta tease her and call her "princess" or any other jokingly term if shes acting like a royal pain in the arse.
yomo86 5y ago
Just my two cents. Any woman who is worth her time can have at least - I am exaggerating here - 20 men lined up who are what you would call alpha; given they are not relationship material but they can lead. The 80/20 rule is being rationalized by many men even here. Being in the top 20 including the ability to lead is not enough. It just allows you to be seen a valid competitor.
VasiliyZaitzev 5y ago
Be the guy who: takes charge, solves problems, always knows what to do. Be 'in command'...in other words, have Strong Frame.
When I am picking a girl up, all she needs to know is (a) "Be ready at {time}", and (b) "The dress code is {dressy/casual/whatever}"
Or I might say, "I will be wearing {x}. Wear whatever fashionable young ladies wear, when men are wearing {x}"
I sometimes add "And be sure to wear pretty underwear for me."
Cue Bloopers howling, "'Pretty underwear'? Bleeargh! So much cringe! Skree! Skree! Run away! Skree!" but that line results in pretty underwear a high percentage of the time. Think of it as a "compliance test" for the girls. Now I have her choosing her underwear based on what she thinks I will find appealing. I'm living in her head, rent free.
javiercer20 5y ago
I Agree 100%..... be in control but don’t be a controller.
Dabunghole 5y ago
^ this guy fucks. And truly gets it.
vengefully_yours 5y ago
Yeah, hence the SEC behind his name. You can take what he says to be factual, useful, and mostly honest... mostly because he is GLO.
VasiliyZaitzev 5y ago
For the hyper-literalists out there, I am not GLO. He and I disagree on a few things, but we are probably "Same church, different pews", when it comes to TRP.
[deleted]
[deleted]
[deleted] 5y ago
[deleted]
magx01 5y ago
You're not confident enough to let it stand. The more aware girls will sniff this out.
latinasonly 5y ago
i agree. when you add something in after a daring line, it mitigates the balls behind that line. the alpha male doesn't need to explain himself.
[deleted]
[deleted] 5y ago
[deleted]
vtr0 5y ago
You already laid claim to her. You are only negging yourself. If you didn’t already claim her as your fucktoy for the night you wouldn’t have brought up the underwear. Best case she’s dripping wet all night because she knows you’ll use her.
[deleted]
chazthundergut 5y ago
Recently used a trick suggested by Rollo as a sort of reverse shit test for women:
Hold out your hand and ask for her keys, "I'll drive."
I just did this with a chick and her reaction was as if she had just taken off a pair of tight heels. She was so happy to have a man just take the lead for once in her life.
Azor_AHYPE 5y ago
Damn, I'm struggling with the opposite behavior lately. It has happened twice in a short period of time with two different girls: I take the lead and they suddenly start to shit test me heavy.
Example: I decide to go to a certain restaurant with the girl. I park the car near the place, everything going great, and right before going inside, she says "I think going to this other place (on the other side of the city) would be way better tonight!" I refuse, we go in and she then proceeds to complain the whole night about how shit this place we are in is. Annoying as fuck.
chazthundergut 5y ago
Her interest was low (she'd never say that to a high-value man) and she pegged you as a thirsty bitch.
She was right. Who puts up with some broad bitchinf all night, when you drove and arranged the date?
The second time she complained, I would have calmly looked her in the eyes and said "are you going to bitch all night?"
And if she didnt immediately get back in line and act like a decent human, I would've calmly stood up, paid the check, and said: "I don't think this is going to work out. Here is $10 for an Uber. Enjoy your evening" and left.
Azor_AHYPE 5y ago
You're right. I know what to do, but I lack the courage to be straightforward and just say "it's not going to work, I'm leaving." Going out with girls still is a new thing in my life, making me very scared of "fucking things up." Damn bad habit, but I think experience will cure that.
juliusstreicher 5y ago
If you DO do the "It's not working out" thing NOW, things will go more smoothly, beginning immediately.
Ihatemoi 5y ago
I am not expert, I am also learning all of this. But you need to get rid of the initial awkwardness and fear of standing up and just saying goodbye.
chazthundergut 5y ago
Good mindset. We all found TRP for a reason, and we've all undergone these growing pains.
Your unwillingness to offend her or drive her away is killing your attraction to these chicks.
I've never had to walk away from a date. But the fact that I am willing and able to, and also willing to confront a chick on her shitty behavior (I have straight up told chicks to put their phones away on dates), makes me attractive. Or at the very least, makes me respected because I respect myself and I demand a baseline level of respect from the people I give my time to.
If you are willing to crawl through a mile of her bullshit for a chance at her smelly clam, how valuable of a man can you be? How many other options can you have?
Keep learning and keep being ruthless in your self-evaluation. And never blame the chick. It is her job to test your boundaries. It is your job to enforce them.
Good luck.
[deleted]
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
Be a bit careful here.... the leading can turn into you doing all the work if you're not aware of the dynamic.
SasquatchMcKraken 5y ago
True. The bar of expectation, once raised, can never again be lowered.
rigbed 5y ago
You command her to drive next time
[deleted]
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
This is something women strive for.... and abhor when they get it.
[deleted] 5y ago
19th amendment... biggest failed shit test in history. Most of the time a failed shit test leads to a lost bang. Sometimes it leads to the end of your civilization as you know it.
[deleted]
Politikr 5y ago
I cant help but shake my head inwardly when I hear this shit. I know a guy at work, his wife doesn't allow him to have a the banking app on his phone. He subconsciously looks at his wife for tacit authorization before almost anything, "will I get in trouble for this'. Its one of the most painful social situations I have ever been in.
[deleted] 5y ago
I would just take a shit and walk away
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
It's also almost universal. Men who can't agree to go out without "checking their calendar" which means "asking permission".
Politikr 5y ago
"Happy wife happy life.." Bro unfuck yourself.
destraht 5y ago
I estimate that the wives sucker their husband into needing to come home immediately after work like it was grade school so that they can have more time together to improve their relationship.
[deleted] 5y ago
Hehaheheheheheee this guy gets it.. unfuck your LIFE gentlemen.. quit moping around god damn
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
Congratulations on your marriage, I hope it continues to be happy for you.
Noblefiz 5y ago
Yep. I’m watching it unfold in the context of a marriage as we speak. My buddy asks his wife for everything. Permission, plans, etc. it’s awful. She despises him. Can’t blame her
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
Men are relentlessly told by society, other men, women and their wives to defer to women. "Happy wife, happy life". It is as if our happiness and wellbeing should be conditional on theirs.
It's the BB side of AF/BB. A shit test of sorts. Do what they ask and they hate you for it. Live your own life on your own terms and be worshipped for it.
Not a tough decision once you know the options.
[deleted] 5y ago
It's not that this is untrue. It's just that the follow-on advice is not what actually makes women happy.
redaftrp 5y ago
You got it all backwards, Happy life, happy wife.
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
Female happiness is not our problem
randomTATRP 5y ago
But if you're already married, you might as well try to be the best version of yourself so she can actually be happy so you both have benefits, right? On-topic of the 'follow-on' advice.
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
Of course not.
Being married is being in a hole AND STILL DIGGING. The answer, if you don't have kids, is obvious
TheWorldOfPugs 5y ago
What we don’t want to? Thanks to TRP I’ve picked up on it so much that it baffles me how many girls are DTF. I’m focused on making money and losing weight, bitches pick up on that shit so quick it’s unreal.
I don’t like it so I blow them off most of the time.
ArchetypicalDegen 5y ago
At the same time, leading is also a responsibility. If you want to take the "lead" in a relationship, it's important to communicate with your partner, and strive to keep them happy (without making sacrifices).
A beta pretending to be an alpha will want to lead a woman, but not know how to maintain her subservience (this tends to lead to abusive men, who have an impotent rage because they can't control their woman). She has to have a reason to want to let you lead. The second you leading negatively effects her, she'll feel trapped and start looking monkey barring her way to a new relationship.
bemore_ 5y ago
Exactly. Leading goes way beyond being decisive and making commands or taking control, way beyond it
The mindset required is that of the team. You are basically the coach, all the way to the bedroom. There are crappy coaches and there a great coaches. One's you will give everything for and other's you wouldn't do anything for. Same with women. Think you can rock up and make another human follow you because trp said so and you've got another thing coming. Mutual respect is earned
SasquatchMcKraken 5y ago
this tends to lead to abusive men, who have an impotent rage because they can't control their woman
This. Potestas without auctoritas is false imperium.
[deleted] 5y ago
Someone's been reading his Roman history. Since we're on the subject, the word virtue comes from the Latin "virtus" which itself comes from the Latin "vir" which literally means man. Virtus also does not directly translate to our modern virtue - it instead means valor, manliness, excellence, courage, character, and worth and other traits perceived as masculine.
So we can see that by the word itself the Romans did not even believe that a woman could possess virtue. It simply would not make sense to them to call a woman virtuous. It's like calling a man a slut. Modern stupidity aside, historically this word simply does not make sense when applied to a man.
SasquatchMcKraken 5y ago
Not sure who down voted you because you're spot on. I've even contemplated making a post on the subject. A male in Latin was a homo. A man was a vir. The latter had to be earned, it was something you became. And yeah it had nothing at all to do with women. The broader definition we use today was divorced from its true meaning centuries after the fact.
InvictusDO 5y ago
alright. so how do we maintain her subservience?
RedPill115 5y ago
"subservience" is (usually) the wrong word.
There's a big difference between "master/slave" vs "lead/follow".
Take your job. You need to get paid (value), and get direction on what to do from your boss (direction). If you don't get paid though you leave. If your boss starts trying to be over controlling (micro managing) it's awful.
When your boss/company continue to provide value (money) and direction on what you should do, you keep working there.
ArchetypicalDegen 5y ago
By simply being good: having a high SMV and assuming leadership. If you keep making good decisions, she'll increasingly love being with you. If you are good at communicating, work out what her wants and needs are, and make sure those are satisfied.
[deleted] 5y ago
This is a bittttttt too mainstream/marriage counseling-esque. Yes you must satisfy her needs. But you don't do this through communication. You do this through providing value.
vengefully_yours 5y ago
The less I communicate with them, the more they want me. Being competent, confident, and capable far outweigh nearly everything you've said. You might want to look into leadership qualities, not corporate bullshit, military leadership. It'll open your eyes and you can see how blue you still are.
[deleted]
[deleted] 5y ago
interexmonster 5y ago
Why?
This is just a other way the women control men.
You let them tell you how to act, talk, dress, "groom" (isnt that feminine to begin with?), makes no sense dudes.
SmamelessMe 5y ago
As ladies of redpillwomen subreddit would say, they're looking for a captain that they can be the first mate for.
You're responsible. That means you steer the relationship. But you're also the one to blame, if the relationship runs aground.
Most of those "evil" shit-tests I see in women these days, seem to me more like clumsy attempts to find out if you are that captain. And failing that, what else she can extract from you in return for beta starfish sex.
Dawnguards 5y ago
Women are children = biggest most harmful idea given BY women to men.. OP doesnt even comprehend that.
Noblefiz 5y ago
You need to re-evaluate what you think you know about trp
Dawnguards 5y ago
"You need to re-evaluate what you think you know about
trpwomen" ftfy.. also you dont even comprehend my previous statement at all.
superyute 5y ago
why not explain to the community then
SasquatchMcKraken 5y ago
I think it's too far to say women are children; they're far more capable than that. But yeah they do instinctively want to be led and it's striking how many dudes don't do this. You need to be her Caesar and Hierophant, her chief and high priest. Too many men try to be her best friend and confidant instead. Well she's already got that, you can't compete in that department. She's with you to get something else. I'd never disavow lifting and looking good but ultimately conveying strength and confidence is the main thing. Especially in an LTR. Don't be the type of guy where the wrapping is better than the actual gift inside. Unless you plan on not living past 30, your abs can't save you in the long run.
Devils_Duke 5y ago
When first reading through TRP material, this was the one claim that really shocked me, until I looked around and noticed that it’s completely true. A scene that really cemented this idea for me was when the Love Island contestants’ families visited the villa this year (yeah I watched a bit of Love Island; so what). It was truly amusing to see every single one of the girls weeping and running to daddy. I also know several women in their mid-twenties who talk to their mother on the phone every day. Just think of how many times you’ve seen a grown woman cry about something completely and utterly insignificant. Just like a child. I used to think my complete lack of emotional dependence on any one human being was a flaw. I have the Red Pill to thank for finally helping me realise that many of my perceived “problems” are in fact masculine traits that do not need to be “fixed” and should in fact be celebrated.
scissor_me_timbers00 5y ago
You’re correct, but “celebrated” is such a lefty term
[deleted] 5y ago
Why do you think the father traditionally "gives" the bride away to the husband. It is a transfer of responsibility. Our forebearers thought that a woman must be under some man's protection/control at all times. There is not a moment when she is left to face the world on her own. The only exception would be older widows.
SasquatchMcKraken 5y ago
Same. Before this I thought it was a real problem that I don't talk a lot and am ambidextrous on the intro/extrovert scale. And I actually wondered if I wasn't a clinical psychopath due to my lack of emotionalism. But now I realize I'm just a mildly outlying case of normal masculine behavior. Just goes to show how even dudes with conservative upbringings like me can internalize BP shit.
scissor_me_timbers00 5y ago
Lol man most guys with conservative upbringings are BP as fuck. They’re playing by the old tradcon set of rules which women stopped following a long time ago
SasquatchMcKraken 5y ago
Depends on whether or not they're following rules or examples. I've watched a pater familias in action with my own father, and while I don't have much hope in finding one I know what I want in a wife thanks to my mother. But if you're just playing make believe with tradcon ideals then yeah, life is going to bitch slap you once you get into the SMP. "This is what I want" vs "this is how it is/ought to be."
Devils_Duke 5y ago
I wonder how many guys here have suspected themselves or been suspected of being psychopaths...
This reminds me that my mother tells both me and my dad that we're probably undiagnosed autistics and has tried to make both of us go to therapy. Doctor Duke's diagnosis: we're both men.
iLLprincipLeS 5y ago
lol, you'd be surprised.
..women remain children all their lives, for they always see only what is near at hand, cling to the present, take the appearance of a thing for reality, and prefer trifling things to the most important.
This is not debatable, read the sidebar: Women, the most responsible teenager in the house
[deleted] 5y ago
God this is so true. Even very intelligent women... they are just so vapid. When you dig deeper, any outward display of intellectual curiosity is skin deep. Any commitment to greater causes or movements is just a form of herd behavior and is triggering her natural desire to seek and ruthlessly enforce consensus.
Bing_Bang_Bam 5y ago
The majority are selfish weird children. The ones that aren't are usually great middle managers.
KyfhoMyoba 5y ago
I disagree only a little.
I think that they don' really mature until they have children of a certain age, i.e., they get past the most responsible teenager only when they have a teenager mature past that. And since women are stuck at that level, it means she's got to have a son grow into adulthood before she can mature that far.
I also think that something happens at menopause as well, but I haven't had enough time to make any good observations on that age bracket since I only ingested TRP about 4 years ago. I haven't found much of Rollo's breakdown of age groups useful on this topic as I'm looking at biological psychology rather than social influences.
[deleted] 5y ago
I agree with the menopause thing. Old women can be very, very wise. They can also be batshit, though.
SasquatchMcKraken 5y ago
One might as well say the same thing about the masses, and that fits a lot of men I know too. I agree with the thrust of it of course. They do stop developing at 18, after all. But I guess the image that pops into my head when I hear children is little 8 year olds rather than teenagers.
vengefully_yours 5y ago
What do you think the results of men being raised almost entirely by girls, told that girls are amazing, and that men should be more like girls so they'd be better men? No real strong male role models in their lives, how the fuck would they know men don't think and act that way?
SasquatchMcKraken 5y ago
True. Even in two parent households the father is often BP at best, absentee at worst. And even dudes who don't necessarily put women on a pedestal (they've dealt with enough to know better) still put pussy on a pedestal. Their masculinity is tied to their n-count. So it's slim pickings on anything remotely pertaining to true masculinity.
CowboyEpicurus 5y ago
The Hydra is a dizzy monster. With its many heads, one would think it could perceive from multiple angles, and by itself achieve a well-reasoned Democratic discourse. This failure is something of which men are often guilty as well. People tend to resist leadership in fear of accepting subordination, which in an egalitarian world is sacrilege.
Hence, societies deprive themselves of sound leadership through force of popular opinion. As a result, incompetence is sustained as something prideworthy - it is a virtue to these people to be incompetent and in a position of power. For, to them, it signifies that anybody can and should do anything they would like, which from a practical standpoint is untrue.
atticusfinch1973 5y ago
Can verify. My current LTR previously was involved with two adult children and got used to having to do everything for them, including pay their bills and wipe their noses.
Every time I take charge and just do something as simple as cleaning out a closet (because it's annoying me) or planning an entire weeks' worth of meals (because I want food to be available FOR ME) she jumps my bones. And I also tell her what to wear in bed and what to do.
Uncle_T_123 5y ago
Don't be naive. These women do not want to be led unless you are chad or in the top 1-3%. If you show any masculinity/ decisiveness and aren't in these groups, you are creepy, egotistical, chauvinist, etc. There's no room for masculinity in their lives unless they want to have casual sex or they can get something from you.
sadomasochrist 5y ago
The top 20% isn't unoptanium.
[deleted] 5y ago
There may be some truth to this. Could you back up your claim by some real life examples, perhaps your personal experience?
FaerieDrake 5y ago
Yes and no. One should lead from a position of power and not from one of weakness. But saying that showing masculinity and decisiveness makes you creepy and egotistical is straight up wrong. It's all about calibration, you can't lead a group as hard if you're in the bottom half. But showing masculinity can sure as hell move you towards the top.
Noblefiz 5y ago
Untrue. Looks aren’t as important as they’re made out to be. You can get laid even if you’re fat jobless man with no ambition if you have a strong frame and good game.
trees_away 5y ago
Agreed. I look back at where I was at the beginning of my RP journey and wonder how the hell a fat slob like me actually managed to land some of the women I did. Even now, I still look at myself and the women that i fuck and scratch my head a bit. But game and frame is king.
trees_away 5y ago
I may be too 1% in some areas but I’m still a fatass. But I lead my girl in such a way that Patrice O’Neil would be giving me props. It really is all about frame. Since the day she’s been in my life she’s never known me as anything but a cocky motherfucker who could replace her in a heartbeat and who makes her life exciting and adventurous. She’s smitten. She tests the boundaries, and I have to remind her that they’re there, and she feels safe. I lead by example, and watch her turn into someone different than when I met her. She’s started to develop a sense of morality and character that was lacking before and has been burdened with a desire to be genuine just by watching me live it.
It’s not about your SMV % as much as it is your leadership skills and value you offer. I’m an old fart who knows shit. She sees it all the time. I can practically predict the future in her eyes. She trusts me and follows me because she feels safe that I’m leading her in a direction she wants to go, even if she doesn’t know it yet. She knows I manipulate her through game and persuasion, but she knows that I want he best for her and only use that power for good. (Though, sometimes for just my good, which just makes her wet. She loves being used. Loved it even more when she sees me ply my silver tongue on other young coeds. I think it makes her pretty wet to see how hungry they are for her man’s dick.)
cliff7521 5y ago
Frame? Is this a new hip word to describe something? Been seeing this more and more lately.
[deleted]
ThrowFader 5y ago
Weird to read but generally in point ????
hinge 5y ago
how do you respond to her testing boundaries? if you had to break it down what are the key points?
trees_away 5y ago
Mostly just the way discussed on the sub and in the sidebar. I treat it like any other shit test and respond accordingly. A few times I’ve had to step it up when she was really trying to figure out if I’m the big scary monster that other people seem to see in there sometimes from stories she’s heard from my friends. In those situations, calibration is essential. What works on my girl works on my girl because I calibrate it to her. She’s a slutty little sub and I pretty much use the sex god method on her in the bedroom (didn’t know that’s what I was already doing until I kept hearing about it and then researched what it was - turns out I could have written that book.) so while there’s a lot of variety, the majority of the time it’s me being fairly rough with her.
So one night she crossed some pretty big respect boundaries, in a joking but bratty way that had undercurrents of actual disrespect in it. She knew exactly what she was doing, and it completely killed the vibe with the other girl I had over who I was working on getting in to bed. I withdrew all attention and affection from her as soon as she started acting out which made her push harder. She was jokingly saying things like “I’m just seeing what it is i have to say to get you to smack the shit out of me.”
Eventually I had enough and realized that if i was going to maintain the “pimp game” frame that I held in our relationship, that i couldn’t respond like my old nice guy self. So I ignored her until she went and moped in bed alone and fell asleep. Then I took the other chick home and let myself seethe intentionally while i drove. I let myself get as mad as I possibly could be at the childishness of what she was doing, knowing exactly what and why she was doing it, but just kissed off that she was forcing me do what I was about to do because it was so out of my historical nature. I knew that since being on TRT for a year, I had developed a spine and knew there was a shadow in me lurking and she needed to see it in order to maintain the respect that she has for me.
Everything that happened next was so foreign to me. I let myself put on a mask of this tough guy who didn’t take shit from anyone and wasn’t about to let his woman act out like that without beating ass. I grabbed a freestanding ladder and placed it behind a doorframe so that one leg of the ladder was poking through into the bedroom but the top of the ladder was wedged against the frame. Then I yanked her out of bed by her ankles and said, very calmly, with almost a sense of psychopathy in the cold calculating nature of my tone, “You wanted to find out if your teddy bear has teeth? Ok, fine. I’ll make sure you think very carefully about my teeth the next time you decide to use me to put you in your place since you’re too much of a little bitch to do it yourself.”
I then tied her by her wrists to the ladder and suspended her there ass naked, with her ankles tied to the bottom. I put a nipple suction thing on one of her nipples and cranked it way past her comfort level. As she started to try to complain through the gag in her mouth I said, “Bitch, don’t even bother with your safe word because it’s meaningless tonight”
Now, this wasn’t true. I seethed long enough to allow myself to want to hurt her. It was a bit scary. I was worried I might lose control and go to far. But i was actually completely stoic and in control the whole time. I wouldn’t have actually hurt her, and I wasn’t ever in danger of losing control, but i wanted her to think I was. I waned her to experience genuine fear for what I might do next.
So I cranked that suction all the way up. Her nipple filled the entire tube. It was pretty gross and I’m sure it hurt like a motherfucker. Then I grabbed a bundle of rope and beat the shit out of her. I didn’t leave marks anywhere but her ass, but she certainly felt it. And her ass had rope marks for a week. I let her ass freeze there on the ladder for a bit, bound and gagged. She was dripping wet the whole time of course.
Eventually I took her down but left her hands and feet bound, threw her on the bed and face fucked her as rough as I possibly could in the most degrading manner possible and blowing a load all over her face. I then left her laying here with my cum dripping for about 15 mins while I got ready for bed, then finally untied her and let her clean herself up.
She came back and curled up next to me on the bed like an obedient little kitten after cleaning herself off. Completely satisfied and her content little self again. I asked her why she did it, and she said she just wanted to see what would happen. I asked her if she liked what she saw, and she said “No, when I saw the look on your face I was scared. I don’t want to see that again.”
Other times it’s just joking shit that she’s testing boundaries with, but I don let her joke in a disrespectful manner with me. Not in a thin skinned kinda way, but more of a “Excuse me, what did you just say to me bitch?” kinda way. If she doesn’t immediately apologize and backpedal, I then ask her if i need to get the ladder and she then decides she doesn’t want to play her games anymore. She’s heard me talk repeatedly about my personal boundaries around respect, so if I give her an inch there it immediately discredits me in her eyes.
Same thing with another 21 year old that I’m trying to add to my harem. I make it very clear what I will tolerate and what i won’t. Not by words most of the time, but through action. I brought her and my girl to an event I was shooting and she basically swerved anytime I advanced on her while she was flirting with every other dude in there. I texted her when I got home and told her she was uninvited to the Incubus concert tomorrow (which she was very excited to go to). The next day she comes up to me with her tail between her legs and apologizes and kisses me, back to her normal affectionate self with me even though i still wasn’t taking her to the concert.
My old beta self would have been convinced that by pulling the “asshole move” of uninviting her to a show she was super excited about, she’d never want to speak to me again. But, I suspected it would play out exactly as it did. She learned that I’m not a Nice Guy and gained respect for me in the process.
trees_away 5y ago
My comment was too long, so here’s the rest of it:
Honestly, the more assertive my girl sees me being in public, the less she tests me. When she sees me being unafraid to stand up for myself or put up with shit, or even in some cases using the fact that i can be a big scary monster in her favor, she feels safe.
Just today I got a big shot in the arm in that department from a situation that arose with her boss. But that requires a bit of backstory:
He hired her because he wanted to fuck her and I told her that from day one. Sure enough the advances start on about day 3 and don’t stop. Not only that, but he was paying her WAY more than she should have been making on each paycheck, with very obvious motivations.
I hadn’t decided whether I was going to handle the situation politically or aggressively yet until my hand was forced by my girl pulling a stunt one day, at the same time I happened to be in the store meeting her boss for the first time. I won’t get into the details, but the situation left her boss with the impression she was stepping out on me (she didn’t, but that’s a tale for another day - lots of TRP lessons in that gem) and I was faced with a choice: leave him thinking that she was already being unfaithful so he definitely has a shot, or crush his hopes right then and there and let him know that he fucked with the wrong dude. The whole time I had been in the store I had been gaming him, turning on the charm. He was certain I was his new BFF until I left. That’s when I reached across the counter to shake his hand and thank him for the delicious lobster roll. As our hands met and I thanked him, I grabbed his as hard as i could and pulled him off balance toward me across the counter. I pulled him close to me and said, in my best “very obviously fake friendly” tone, “And oh yea, how about you stop trying to fuck my girl?” Loud enough so every employee heard it.
He went white, starts mumbling the most pussy-ass apology you can imagine, and furiously studies his shoelaces. True to his word, he did stop trying to fuck her. He also stopped paying her like he was trying to fuck her, and fucking with her hours. That was a couple weeks ago.
Fast forward to today, after he starts demanding that she cover a shift tomorrow she wasn’t scheduled for, I have enough of it and call him on her phone on speaker for her to hear. This is how the conversation went:
“Hi Chuck. We are about to have a conversation that you’re not going to like very much. I was going to just let things play out, but since you continued to be a fuck wad, now this is between you and I. So you can listen to what i have to say or the next conversation you’ll be having with her will involve her attorney. I have over an hour of voice recordings with many many sound bites that a judge would be very eager to hear in court.” (Our state only requires a single party to give consent to a recording and my GF is smart - records most interactions with men.)
“In addition I have, all of the evidence I need in the form of pay stubs that show you intentionally fucked with her job after she’d had enough of your advances. According to the attorney I consulted, it’s an open and shut Title VII case. So here’s the deal, I don’t want to have to see your face again, and if we have to go to court over this I’ll be seeing you for a long time. How about we make this easy for both of us, and you agree to a settlement: You’ll continue paying my girlfriend for the next six months as if she still worked there at the original rate you were paying her, and you’ll never hear from me again. How does that sound?”
“Uhh, I think that sounds very reasonable “ he said in his best turtle impression.
“Good. You have 24 hours to let her know your decision” click
The look of adoration on her face alone was worth it, but I would do it again just to experience the adrenaline rush of punking such a scummy fuck boy pussy.
If you think I’m making this up, PM me and I’ll send you the voice recording of our phone call today.
Edit: Alright for the dudes asking for a recording. My voice is disguised in the recording, not the actual call.: https://instaud.io/2DSF
teeteedoubleyoudee 5y ago
I'd like to hear the recording please, send us over a link boyo.
trees_away 5y ago
https://instaud.io/2DSF
freew33zy 5y ago
I would like this as well. You sound like the man.
trees_away 5y ago
I’m not the man yet. Still just a former bloop on a journey to become redder. But I’m a lot further than I was a year ago. I still have a lot of discipline to learn and struggles to overcome. I am terrible at managing money so I’ve backed myself into some bad corners financially, I rely on weed too much to manage the massive amount of stress i live in on a daily basis, and I still find myself getting too hung up on some women that I’m mega attracted to personality-wise (I hang around far too many beautiful women as a photographer to just be smitten by looks alone - but you give me a woman with gorgeous eyes, petite little body, and actual talent in creative pursuits and i have a hard time not getting a major crush.)
But i live with an abundance mentality quite well. My girl could leave today and I’d be like “cool, more time to finish my damn album.” I’d miss her company, but she’d be replaced quickly by multiple women who take up less of my time.
And I’ve grown a spine lately. That feels really damn good. The amount of self respect i have now compared to a year ago is fantastic. I treat myself a lot better than I used to most of the time these days. I treat myself like i have value and worth, and I don’t allow others actions to communicate otherwise while still remaining in my life.
I don’t throw myself after people, desperate for their attention and affection like a little bitch. I create value around me and slowly a social network is forming, centered around me. That’s a new experience, I’ll tell ya. I was never a “cool kid” in high school, and nobody wanted to hang out with me. Now at 37, I have a bunch of 20 somethings that think I’m cool as shit. They love my music and photography, as well as the mentoring that comes from just being around me and getting to know me and allowing me input in their lives.
Edit: oh, and I have a mission now. That’s the real difference.
I’ll share a link to the recording today at some point.
trees_away 5y ago
https://instaud.io/2DSF
OGAbunai 5y ago
Please send me the recording. And no, I dont doubt you but I want to hear it myself for research.
TheBattlingBastard 5y ago
First step to being a leader is to find a good follower