For context — I’m 6'2, fit, make close to seven figures, drive a supercar, own my house, and I’m often told I'm handsome (can verify all of this if it sounds like BS). I get that all of that’s superficial, but it’s what women typically say they want in an “ideal man.”
Still, I’ve got dozens of texts (unprovoked) from girls saying they had an amazing date and wanted to see me again… only to ghost or cancel right after making plans.
It’s not like I’m retarded socially or talk politics — first dates are light, fun, and easy.
I’ve even had one girl (later found out she was bipolar) confirm second date, then disappear the next day.
I don’t get it. Intimidation seems too easy an answer — and I doubt most of these women are meeting guys who check more boxes.
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 1d ago
I think it might be similar, but not quite that.
You know how a woman might be really hot, but you can tell that she's a high-maintenance pain in the ass? It's likely that you're the male equivalent. They aren't "intimidated" or "scared", but rather feel it won't be worth the effort.
Are you showing this shit off? Are you picking them up in your supercar? When you take them home, is your house all fancy and shit?
You might be making them doubt their ability to hang onto you, and so they aren't bothering to try.
When you lead with your wallet (and before you say that you don't, if you're taking a supercar on a date then you are), you'll only attract gold diggers, and simultaneously repel women who feel "unqualified" for lack of a better term.
Do you have a more modest vehicle you can drive on dates or to meetups?
Can you dress in decent, but not top-of-the-line clothes? Like maybe shit from Kohl's?
Can you act down-to-earth and be fun?
Consider yourself lucky.
Putting aside this particular post, and giving some food for thought based on your entire history here:
OK, remember that time your GF left because you were messaging exes? Did you learn from that?
Are you still making an LTR your goal (big mistake), or just being open to the possibility?
Are you getting laid with the women you're talking about in this post? Because if you are, then that's fucking winning dude, and just about anyone here would trade places with you in a heartbeat. Sexual abundance and variety is about as good as it gets. If you aren't getting laid, then work on that.
Something clicked with that last line. Are you just taking them out, chatting them up, and not even trying to fuck? Because women frequently are incredibly unforgiving of a man who doesn't even try to fuck.
Jocbro 1d ago
I’m not pushing for a relationship. I have at least 2 that are pushing for one but I’m not feeling all that
No I’m not pushing for sex or escalating on the first date, which I’m going to work on
I do have a more modest vehicle, I wear basic clothes minus my AP watch..
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 1d ago
A lot of women take it as an insult if a guy doesn't try to fuck. They wonder if the guy was even attracted to them, or if the dude's gay, or if the dude is just a wuss.
You're always better off trying.
If she wants it, you get laid!
If she rejects you, you know not to waste anymore time on her!
Escalate, escalate, escalate has always been pretty basic RP stuff.
Lone_Ranger 3 1d ago
The more I read about it, the more I am convinced of this:
The problem is 'dating'. That is the issue. The problem is the game. The dating game is just retarded for men. The only way to win this game is to stop playing it.
Modern 'dating' is fucking retarded. Just step away from it. From the way that you self describe, you do not need it. High value men do not need the dating game to score, or find women for fun, sex or LTRs.
The issue with dating is that it is broken. The only candidates that you will find in that pool are broken females, ones that like validation and attention. They are not there for what they say they are there for (to find a date) they are there to find a way to make their phone go bing. They are looking for digital interaction. They are lonely and bored, and they want to sit on their sofa and have their phone go bing all night long.
TLDR: step out of the dating game, go out into the real world, and if you are the man you say you are, you will be getting offers non-stop. Instead of wasting your precious time, energy and life force on playing the retarded dating game online, go out into the real world and slay.
Thank me later.
Oh - and to be clear - I do not mean go out IRL and start number hunting.
First-light 2 15h ago
Totally agree. Dating is retarded. Don't take women out, feed and entertain them just because you like the look of their profile and they like the look of yours. This applies to men of all value levels.
In his case he is also dealing with hardened sluts and he is just a hardened Chad. Both sides are too numb to make a real connection or to see potential past the top trump stats of comparing profiles. Girl needs to promote herself as hot. Guy needs to promote himself as successful. This is just bullshit as the sole formula for success at higher levels. People still need to actually find people they can relate to. Lower value females may be turned for a long time by shallow wealth and a toned body. However, if there is real high value on both sides, they still need connection as much as anyone else. He may be meeting female versions of himself -hardened characters sorting through the dross with a cool head, they know the moves to make and they can then filter ruthlessly.
If he wants more, he may also need to ask what does he bring beyond a toned body, a fast car and 7 figures. Women are never satisfied with their status quo. Once you have promoted a woman to those levels, you will need something else. If he has had 1000 first dates and still isn't getting what he wants from dating he must conclude that either he is looking for what is not on offer from dating or he needs to change his approach because he is at least part of the problem.
throwaway415 1 5h ago
theyre not even turned on by it. they are turned on by good looks and game.
girls will fuck wealthy and successful guys not because they are attracted to them but because they want to benefit from their wealth. those same chick's will fuck broke dudes behind his back because they look better and/or have more game.
remember Lester from Casino? thats who they are attracted to. theyre not attracted to Sam Rothstein, just his money
I know a lot of folks here dislike this guy as he has somewhat of a bad reputation for repackaging common red pill ideas and monetizing them without giving credit, and occasionally being wrong about shit, but I think he sums it up fairly well here: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=x0b_ytUw-5M
tl;dr: women make rules for betas and break rules for alphas
af, bb
Mountainman 2d ago
So you have 12-36+ women texting you post first date, and they’re not following up for a 2nd date. In my opinion, considering someone of your success, even if that success was in the time frame of let’s say 18 months, I think you’re going very well no?
I’d imagine that you are converting 2nd dates with that much success, just not as much as you think you should.
The truth is you probably are intimidating or women get the sense that you have multiple options and only wanted her for the night. Maybe you could fix your issue with some pursuing and a strategic double text.
[deleted]
Jocbro 2d ago
Intimidated is my only explanation but doesn’t seem that plausible.. I tend to only text for dates but rarely do I push for sex on date one unless chemistry is high
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2d ago
As mentioned in another post, you need to try to answer your own question somewhere in the post body in AskTRP
It's a self reflection and independent thought requirement for posting here
Jocbro 2d ago
I get no dumb questions but what’s the point of the forum if there’s no room for discussing something?
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2d ago
What are you talking about
You are allowed to ask and discuss your question. You are required to attempt to find an answer based on your trp knowledge in your post.
Self reflection and problem solving is a cornerstone of being a successful man
Jocbro 2d ago
Yes I agree but they are all hypothetical, not many rich guys present on the forum with first hand experience. Red Pill says dating should be a breeze if you meet even half of my accolades which has not been my experience so I'm asking a real world experience based question
Musicgoon78 3 2d ago
Did you mention to these girls all the amazing shit you're bringing to the table?
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2d ago
"TRP says"
I don't know who said that. You are taking short hand generalizations of what women like and turning it into something it's not while lacking other fundamentals of the attraction and rapport process
You are not self reflecting. This is the nth time I've seen you ask some degree of this question.
It's one sentence. Just attempt to answer your question. Your trp understanding is misguided and it is clear you have stopped reflecting because of some kind of misperception of trp and dating
Jocbro 2d ago
I’ve followed Red Pill for 12 years and read it all.
I’m by the book—attractive, non-needy, maxed out in every category, any more is diminishing returns. Yet still get ghosted frequently. It makes no sense.
After hundreds if not 1,000+ first dates I think I have experience of what a good date is or not
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2d ago
Yes. It makes sense if you stop zeroing on maxxing everything. Keeping women is, contrary to your belief system, not all about maxxing
The date in of itself, whether she cums 50 times in your bed, how hot and rich you are etc, does not define if a woman sticks around
Based on your specific problem, there is absolute hands down gauranteed some rapport fundamental you are not adhering to. There is a you problem in this equation somewhere
At the end of the day, you are required to follow the forum rules. It does not matter if your attempt to answer your question is accurate or not. The rule is to just best guess answer it. One sentence
I cannot let you not follow the forum rules. I'm not going to signal to other people that some people have to follow it and others don't. It doesn't matter how long you've been in TRP.
The forum rules apply to everyone here.
Jocbro 2d ago
Delete the post if need be. I can’t find anything in there side bar about rapport
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2d ago
I understand it's not in the side bar.
I'm not deleting your post. I'm asking you to follow the posting rules on subsequent posts
mattyanon Admin 2d ago
Well, they're female. Never forget that.
Ok...
Happens to all of us dude.
Women are renowned for making terrible life choices, so I wouldn't worry about the odd girl doing this.
But if >50% are pulling this shit, then it's down to you.
Some questions:
Jocbro 2d ago
All of the above im doing correctly - not usually touchy though.
mattyanon Admin 1d ago
So all good, apart from the most important one
Jocbro 1d ago
Do you think it’s that I’m not providing enough comfort with these women?
mattyanon Admin 1d ago
You must be physically escalating.
If not, she'll feel you are not attracted to her and you certainly won't be exciting her.
Another problem you may have is failed shit tests. These are almost always her doing something unpleasant to gain control over you or the situation. The classic is "we're not going to have sex tonight", others include "buy me a drink" and "you're gay".
Failing these tests will kill attraction.
You are failing to escalate. You are acting only if the chemistry is high, which means you are waiting for her to lead rather than creating the chemistry.
Mountainman 1d ago
I was just touchy on a date and didn’t even get a kiss. “I have no underwear on” and yet she ended the date with a hug. Fml lol
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1d ago
The kiss is your job, G
Do you have any idea how many women were dying to fuck me and later told me they couldn't make the first move
That's your job man
No-Stress-Cat 2d ago
I read down through some of your posts, and I found this to be interesting:
Here is your problem:
You read the books. You got the looks. You got the bank. You got the game. You got the skills. For what?
CHASING PUSSY
Somewhere along the line you lost your purpose. Is it because you reached the top, reached your goals, achieved your purpose, and got it all?
Now your new purpose is chasing pussy. That's why they're ghosting you. You've reverted to a big, rich, jacked, hot-as-fuck, beta male.
You need to find a new purpose that doesn't involve women.
Jocbro 2d ago
This just insinuates that I pedestalize women which is totally opposite of reality. I don’t treat women with any special treatment
No-Stress-Cat 11h ago
When you get ripped, rich, and skills just so that you can attract women, yes, you are pedestalzing them.
When your goal is to build yourself up to meet the high standards of what the "ideal man" is for women, yes, you are pedestalizing them.
When you say, "Look at me. I did all this to make women want me, so why don't women want me?", yes, you are pedestalizing them.
Women should be the byproduct of Giga-Chadness, not a focal point.
Jocbro 2h ago
This is under the assumption that’s my motivating factor. The end result is the same regardless so this doesn’t make sense unless I am giving them special treatment
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1d ago
You obviously lack basic rapport
It's unclear if you even know what you want in a woman, and if you do know what you want in a woman you somehow meet one that meets your standards you don't express enough give for them to stick around.
Basically the guy who grinded his soul down and when women he wants want him shows negligible amounts of sufficient interest to make her think she matters
Women auto reject. If you don't give a sufficient amount of interest nothing will carry you they will freak out and dip
SwarmShawarma 2d ago
M9st importantly Being close to 7 fig means you can afford to pay for consult of someone from the sphere.
ApexMindset charges staggering 1k\h but since you think the problem is serious and you can pay, that means you save more m9ney by paying and answering ALL personal questions, rather than sharing you have money, house and supercar, to bunch of strangers (and I don't think its the first time).
Musicgoon78 3 1d ago
He can afford to buy himself a wife. Then he doesn't have to learn charisma.
Jackmoter 1d ago
There could be hundreds of reasons - sometimes you have to let go - it's not always about you.
Hypergamy.... You might be one of several guys she's dating.
Ex's..... an ex entered the picture, bye bye new guys.
The list goes on - you could probably get a good list from ChatGPT.
throwaway415 1 1d ago
women are biologically incapable of recognizing a genuinely high value male. What they think is "high value" is being a tattooed loser thug. That's why everywhere you look you see these broke single moms with 12 kids and 12 different baby daddies, most of whom are either dead or in prison.
There's a difference between genuine value and SMV value to women. A guy who is successful and intelligent has objectively high value, but that has nothing to do with his SMV value to women. They'll pick a broke tyrone in the hood over him because he gave them vagina tingles.
If you lead with money, you'll just get gold diggers who will treat you like a sucker.
The only thing you have going for you in terms of SMV value to women is your height, facial geometry and physical fitness. Everything else - having lots of money, a supercar, a house, does absolutely JACK shit except attract gold diggers (to your wallet, not you) and I know this from personal experience as I've fucked countless girls when I was broke as fuck, in and out of jail while their rich, successful boyfriend was away from home. As soon as he'd leave they'd call me over. All the money he made working hard, they took and spent buying me food, clothes, and weed. I had a chick even pay for my hotel for months while I was homeless, using her successful rich boyfriend's money.
If you want women to be attracted to YOU and not your wallet, you need to carry yourself a certain way that gives them vagina tingles.
Don't get me wrong - I am in no way endorsing living a criminal lifestyle. I did this for a long time and that lead me to a lot of very bad situations, the effects of which still haunt me to this day. I do not encourage anyone to become a tattooed degenerate thug just to turn on dumb ass bitches whose only value is having a wet hole you can stick your dick in. Just understand that this is what they're attracted to. They want a thug, a gangster, a dude who's dangerous and doesn't give a shit about their feelings. They don't want some guy who caters to them giving them rides in his ferrari and taking them on yachts and expensive nightclubs in Cancun, that dude's a sucker and he'll get played like one while they fuck around with some hoodrat on the street behind his back.
Just gotta carry yourself the right way if you want them to actually feel attracted to you. You gotta have good looks and strong game. Everything else is bullshit
Jocbro 2h ago
I had an ONS lastnight, I’m back to approaching in person at bars instead of relying on dating apps.
Although everything you said is true, having a high SMV plus money is the most optimal thing. Women won’t love an ugly rich guy but a hot rich guy is undefeated
I’ve gathered that I’m not displaying enough interest. Made a conscious effort to show attraction towards gal I met lastnight and ended up sleeping with her a couple hours later so it’s working so far, will test tonight again
throwaway415 1 1h ago
having money might get women to sleep with you, just remember that they aren't attracted to you because of your money. in fact, they actually are less attracted to dudes who spend money on them as that gives beta signals. being beta isn't attractive. girls use betas for money
id rather be rich and let bitches think im broke, or at the very least ensure they understand im not spending a cent on them and I expect them to pay
if you are high value, youre the prize. why would you pay them to give them the privilege of being with you. they should be the ones paying