First: What /u/redpillschool said. Glass of water.

However, I just had an idea I think I'll try sometime. There's a magical little shot called a Prairie Fire. It's tequila and tabasco sauce, for the uninitiated. I'm a sick fuck so this is one of my favorite shots, but every one of my friends goes into convulsions over it.

Perfect drink for a mooch.

I had a mother/daughter "team" (daughters 21st) try this on me and a friend. Kept badgering my friend to get drinks. I couldn't hear, but he dispensed with them.

The mother came up and goes "you guys should do shots with us". "I'll do a shot with you, but I'm not buying you drinks". They bought US drinks, and we fucked off. Was glorious. Didn't wanna have anything to do with a 45 year old and her hippo daughter.

Barkeep! A glass of your finest water for the lady. Apply shit-eating grin to face generously.

Depends on my goal.

If i want to pick her up, then probably,
"If youre here to drink, you go on ahead. Im here to take someone like you back to my place (its not actually my place, 90% of the time)."

If i want to get her number or whatever,
"And how do i know you wont up and leave the second i blow a dime on you?"
50/50 between hostile reactions and instant contact details.

If im not out looking for anything and im just drinking,
"No. Anything else?"

Work to the goal.
Body language is always calm and virtually motionless. Verbal is always calm, and maybe slightly bored (bored seems to work for me. i guess it sounds like youve done it so many times its boring? idk).

Did you forget you're ID or something?

"Ladies first."

"No."

check it..

http://laidnyc.wordpress.com/2013/11/12/how-to-be-a-real-man-and-buy-girls-drinks-in-bars/

Ladies first, I'll get the next round. /shit test deflected

This one worked for me before:

Girl: "So you going to buy me a drink?"

Me: "I don't buy drinks for girls I haven't kissed yet". Approach her with mischievous grin and kiss her.

Me: "I also don't buy drinks for girls I have kissed. I should have mentioned that"

Show me your tits.

You have something she wants (money) and she has something you want (tits) so tell her you'll make it an even trade.

I have no respect for perfectly capable women panhandling at bars because they don't want to spend their own money. They deserve to be humiliated. They're also usually easier to lay after being knocked down a peg.

[edit] Another good one is "Honey what do you do for a living? Interesting. You see this is dialogue, we're getting to know each other. It's the kindling of friendship. However we're not friends yet. Luckily, last I heard people who [insert profession] generally make enough money to buy their own drinks."

"Sure!" Then get her a glass of water.

Or, "Sure, but you buy me one first!"

Edit: Body language, look inviting and pleasant, smile, look like you'll comply. You don't want to appear shaken in your frame.

Are you homeless? You dont' look homeless. Homeless people beg for stuff from strangers is why I'm asking.

All in a playful manner.

"No, will you buy me one?"

"Sure." get bartender's attention "One Shirley Temple, please."

"I would, but I'm broke and ran out of money."

"No"

"You buy me a drink and I'll buy you breakfast tomorrow. If you're lucky."