I'm 39, divorced, and have had some success with women since my divorce. About 12 women in two years, mostly much younger than me, so I'm doing OK.
Lately I have been hanging out with some new friends who are better at the game than me. One guy is 25, a bit of an asshole, for example talking explicitly about sex with women he doesn't know, telling them that their religion and beliefs are bullshit, basically just doing what he wants. Women love him.
I tend to hold back, because I'm older and think that the responsible, gentleman frame is more suited to my age and physical appearance (I'm small-framed 5'8"). I still approach, isolate and bang women but I'm under the radar.
Wondering if going full asshole would get even better results. I don't have women hanging off me like my friend does, and even some girls I'm seeing are attracted to him.
Thoughts? Especially would like to hear from older guys. I'm just getting cognitive dissonance from being 39, not muscular or good-looking and running asshole rockstar game.
scottishredpill 10y ago
I'm 32 and run asshole game. I'm not muscular (working on it), and think I'm ok looking.
Give it a try, see how you do and see if it works for you.
[deleted] 10y ago
You should be pulling in girls in their mid 20s if your game is tight. Use a slightly more "disappointed dad" frame. Girls with daddy issues strive to please.
enrgze 10y ago
Yeah I am doing exactly that. Being the older but still cool guy and getting girls in their 20s. Just wondering if emulating my friend's younger guy game would be totally incongruent. Guess I'll have to experiment. Don't see many role models for don't-give-a-fuck 40 year old game.
[deleted] 10y ago
You are approaching "men of a certain age" range. If you don't already, check out the private man. He has a mature approach to red pill. Good stuff.
captshady 10y ago
Is that a link, or book? "The Private Man" is the title?
[deleted] 10y ago
http://theprivateman.wordpress.com/
_whistler 10y ago
As a bit of an asshole myself, here's my take on it.
First: not all girls respond to the same game in the same way. We should all know this, just throwing it out there in case there's anyone who doesn't. Now.
If you're naturally an asshole, asshole game will work for you. I'm naturally an asshole, or so my peers tell me. Personally, I think amused mastery tends to be my main vibe with girls. But I get a lot of male peers watching my interactions with a girl, then shaking their heads, wide-eyed and chuckling "Jesus _whistler, you're such an asshole!"
No girl has ever called me an asshole. Well, at least not in the first several weeks of the seduction. When I give a direct order for some type of service I want a girl to perform, she generally complies without complaint. When I act in a manner that would cause conventional social peers to label me an asshole, I get a positive response from the girl I'm with. Because this is naturally who I am.
Examples. I've been a seeing a sweet, petite, sexually ravenous redhead for over a month. Here's what we did in the last two days:
Again, this works with my girls because this is who I am naturally. I don't have to think about it, I just handle the situation the first way that comes to mind.
On the other hand, I know a guy with respectable game who is the furthest thing from an asshole. Because it doesn't come naturally to him, being an asshole wouldn't be as effective as the game he uses (good ol' boy redneck game, btw - I'm always shaking my head that the shit he does and says actually works).
I guess this is the long-winded way of saying: Try lots of forms of game. Find the one that comes naturally. Do that.
Edit: Would like to add that I'm about to turn 30 with a job and hourly wage that keeps me barely above the poverty line. Physically, I personally think I'm a good looking motherfucker, but objectively I'm not great, overweight at 210lbs and 5'8", although I'm stocky with exceptional posture, so I carry it well. I have no doubt that as I continue to improve myself physically, my game will turn out even better results, but that applies to any type of game, not just asshole game.
PyroTechnica 10y ago
Do you have any more examples of ways to be an asshole or asshole game?
_whistler 10y ago
Well...no, not really. I suppose I could go down the list of my daily interactions, but my whole point was that it works for me because it comes naturally. As such, it isn't something I put a lot of thought into, no routines or anything like that. Honestly, not sure if your comment is a troll, sarcasm...seems like a weird thing to ask. But then again, maybe that's because being an asshole comes naturally to me. Dunno, brother.
PyroTechnica 10y ago
It's not a troll or sarcastic comment, I'm genuinely interested in things that you do that you would consider to be asshole game.
I know that the point of your post was that it comes naturally to you and everyone should do what comes naturally to them, which is great and all, but maybe some guys want to try the whole "do my dishes and give me a bj" thing if it works.
_whistler 10y ago
Fair enough. I'll see what I can do.
I'll start by being up front about my experience with women, which is fairly limited. I'm not one of these guys with a handful of spinning plates, nor have I been practicing seduction for many years. I lost my virginity when I was 26, and as I said before, I'm about to turn 30. In that short time, over two years was lost to a relationship that started off Blue Pill, and ended once I fully accepted the Red Pill. There are many more experienced Red Pill submitters here than I. What I do have going for me is a combination of balls, hunger, and insight. So. Take my words with the proverbial grain of salt.
As I mentioned before, I don't think of what I do as Asshole Game™. My friends seem to think I'm an asshole, so I've sort of accepted their external perspective. But you may disagree. Even if I do run Asshole Game™, it's difficult for me to form one-off examples because that's like demonstrating individual brush strokes of a painting without taking into account the mental and emotional state of the artist at the time of the original work. There's always a cause behind the effect, and I have the overwhelming urge to furiously type out my entire life story along with all my research and experimentation that led me to where I am. I'll refrain from the life story, however, and try to stay within the general scope of your request. Now. Let's dive in with a numbered list.
Abundance Mentality - If we're focusing exclusively on the masculine/feminine dynamic, this is where it begins. I don't care if the girl in front of me slaps me and runs shrieking, or unzips my fly and climbs aboard right then and there. Whether I've just met her or been dating her for months, there are plenty more around. A girl's reactions to me are her own - out of my direct control - so why the fuck would I worry about it?
Self-Assurance - This follows naturally from the first point. When I'm not desperately putting all my investment in the girl, I'm much more highly invested in myself. I'm in it for me, sweetheart, and if you don't like it, move the fuck along. Shit test? What the fuck is that? Oh, you think you can control me by playing the victim...that's cute. With self-assurance, I say what's on my mind. Beyond taking into account the situational context, I don't worry too much about framing myself because my natural frame is the most flattering one. It suits. So I say and do what I want, and I laugh at them and smack their asses when they give me "the look".
Really, that's about it for mindset. If you want actionable examples...well, I'll give you anecdotes from my own experience. Take from them what you will.
Had my girl over for supper. Baked lamb chops in a cast iron skillet with french green beans side. Upon her first bite, my little lady had the good manners to cover her mouth, make a gagging sound, and rush to the trash can to spit out the meat. Apparently she doesn't really like meat, or vegetables, or anything healthy for that matter. I have no idea how she has stayed as attractive into her early twenties as she is, with no nutritional values. Anyway, as I was opening my mouth to tell her to get out and not return until she'd learned some manners, tears began welling up in her eyes and she apologized profusely. She explained that she didn't like most meat and vegetables. I explained, sternly, that there was no excuse whatsoever, short of a food allergy, for the reaction I'd just witnessed. Weakly, she came back with "I can't help it..." Yes, you can. You know how I know? You don't like those vegetables on your plate, but you're going to eat every single one. That's right. I made her eat her vegetables, something her mother apparently overlooked. Really, I gave her an option: get out, or eat your vegetables. She chose to eat them. I cannot abide a picky eater. She eats what I set in front of her now, and she's learning to cook properly under my tutelage.
Also on the topic of nutrition, I'd noticed my girl eating an abundance of sweets recently. I mentioned it a couple of times, but hadn't addressed it properly yet. I let her take me to a county fair the other day, and after observing her intake of sweets there, bluntly told her we'd have to put my plans of taking her to the state fair on hold, because she'd still be burning off all the calories from the current outing. She now asks my permission before eating dessert, and she does it with a smile.
I'm kinda grasping at straws to come up with any good examples here. See, none of the things I've said seem to me like they're any part of an overarching Asshole Game™. I just look at all this as dominant, forthright masculinity. Do I seem like an asshole to you? I'd be interested in the general opinion, because my friends think I am, but I don't really see it.
Edited for typos.
[deleted] 10y ago
There is a time and place for assholish tendencies. I have a list of "Man Rules" that I frequently reread to remind myself of various aspects of game. Below are ones I think that pertain to your situation. They may not explicitly answer your questions but if you read between the lines, you'll see a common thread. In short, I don't think asshole game is going to get you where you want to be. At your age (shit, our age), you're/we're more than likely not going to enjoy dealing with the kind of "girl" that asshole game lands you/us.