About a year ago I created two posts:

This one where I introduced the word "inspin" to give a name to the phenomenon of women who can't get commitment (the counterpart to "incels"... who are men who can't get sex), and...

This one where I examine rites-of-passage from childhood into manhood, and how that process has been transferred from men to women, to the detriment of all.

I'd like to expand on those thoughts here, because the language we use to describe things affects how we view those things, and reveals a lot about what we value. Before I proceed I want to define a few terms.

  • Man - an adult human male.
  • Boy - a pre-adult human male, or a young male who has not yet undergone his rite-of-passage into manhood.
  • Incel - involuntary celibate: a man who would like to be in a sexual relationship but does not have a willing partner (for any reason).
  • Inspin - involuntary spinster: a woman who would like to be married but is not (for any reason). The female counterparts to incels. Recent widows do not fall into that category.
  • Coward - a man who lacks bravery.
  • I will further specify that both incels and inspins can be perfectly nice, well-adjusted people... their plights are often the result of simply losing the genetic lottery, and being ugly is not a moral failure. It's how they react to their situation that speaks to their character. Words like "femcel" have no meaning because 1) any woman with a smart phone can get sex any time she wants, so there is no involuntary aspect to a woman's celibacy, and 2) since women are the gatekeepers of sex and men are the gatekeepers of commitment, incels (men who can't get sex) and inspins (women who cant get commitment), are the two sides of the same coin.

Before the west abandoned rites-of-passage from boyhood into manhood, those rites were under the control of men. The men of a particular community decided when a boy was worthy of joining the ranks (often literally) of men. There was usually some sort of test involved, often involving the display of physical prowess and/or courage in the face of danger. There's a reason for that... the men at your side were the ones who determined whether you lived or died when threats appeared. The boys were left in the rear (women and children were kept out of danger as much as possible)... so the most important traits for a man to possess were prowess and courage. Once a boy became a man there was really only one way to "lose his man card"... to be branded as a coward.

Back in the days of black-and-white television there was series called "Branded" that centered around the plight of a cavalry officer who was the sole survivor of a battle. Although he had fought bravely, the fact that he alone survived resulted in him being court-martialed for cowardice and drummed out of the Army. Listen to the theme song, and pay particular attention to the last few lines. In short, the worst insult one can level at a man is to call him a coward. The infamous White Feather Campaign was so wildly successful (and now notorious) because it empowered young women to fling the charge of cowardice at young men who were not at the front lines (in the most pointless war ever fought, by the way). The book, "The Red Badge of Courage" is the story of a man who initially ran from battle, but in his shame he sought out danger later in order to get wounded, and his wound "proved" that he was a man... not a coward. Even now the (US) military gives "Purple Heart" medals to those wounded in combat, and special badges to designate those who were involved in "close" combat. US Army soldiers who have served in war are allowed to wear their unit patch on their right shoulders under the flag patch. (Soldiers who have not deployed just wear the flag patch, and by around 2010 the absence of a combat patch on a senior Army soldier's right shoulder would be noticed.) Men will go to great lengths to avoid the charge of cowardice because to be a coward is to surrender one's right to be thought of as a man... even to the point of taking on missions that are certain to result in death.

We've entirely done away with rites-of-passage whereby men earn recognition as "not-boys," and since military service is no longer common (nor exclusively male), few people think of cowardice as a way (much less the only way) for a man to "lose his man card."

Now a man (any adult human male) can have his man card rescinded by being an "incel." Note that the only thing that makes a man is his ability to find a willing sex partner. It shows you what "we" value when women are left in charge. No longer is courage the measure of a man... sexiness is.

Under the old rules physical prowess was important, but if a man was wounded and lost his legs (and thus his ability to fight) he was still considered a man. In fact, his debilitating wounds were proof that he had manly courage. Likewise if a man aged out of his ability to fight he retained his status as a man even after his prowess was gone. But under the new rules presided over by women, a man is only a man to the extent that he's sexually desirable right now.

The modern counterpart to Chuck Conner's character in "Branded" is not a man who is unjustly accused of cowardice, but any man who justifiably criticizes a woman. We get it here all the time. You non-mods don't see most of it, but people come into the r/whereareallthegoodmen sub and call us "InCeLzzz!" nearly every day. The implication is that we're not men because (they falsely think) that the reason we criticize the decisions of some women is because we cant get any women. Just like the White Feather girls called men cowards for not being in uniform in order to get them to throw themselves into the teeth of 8mm Maxim guns, the charge of "incel" is used to shame men into great displays of service on behalf of women no matter the cost... including the requirement to never, ever hold any woman accountable for her actions. If a man will charge a machine gun to avoid being branded a coward and having his manhood questioned, what will a man do on behalf of a woman (who can destroy him with the courts) to avoid being branded an "incel" and having his manhood questioned?

Remember that the next time somebody calls you an "InCeL," and treat that with the same contempt that a brave man would feel about someone who called him a coward.