This started as a comment response in the Jordan Peterson on Crazy Women thread but bears its own post.

Many, many, years ago I was in a live-in LTR that took so much energy and attention that a lot of my friendships didn't survive, because I let them atrophy. Too many declined invitations, cancelling plans last minute, unresponded to calls, and one or two "I can't invite you over if I want peace at home," events and people just drop off. If your LTR starts fights before you go to see your friends, or worse, creates a shitstorm before a planned social event that you have the invitation for, she is isolating you from your support network to get more leverage in your relationship. Some people just have instincts for parasitic behavior they learned from narcissistic parents. A girl like that doesn't care what kind of attention she gets, so long as she has it, particularly at the expense of someone else. That's what being taught to "talk through," issues with women can do to men.

The guy in the relationship who lets his friendships atrophy and his support network fail has had his fundamental self esteem damaged. In the case of dating a crazy chick, it's often by some kind of emotional blackmail where she takes the thing he defines himself by (provider, honest, kind, strong, smart, loyal, etc. ) creates a situation where that value is questioned, then holds it over him to do what she says to "prove," himself. That's every woman, but with the insane, it's like that 100x.

But here's the point of this post:

Most guys are essentially walking around with a gun to their own heads, to be something, do something, believe something "or else." That's what your ego does, it puts the gun to your head and your finger on the trigger and tells you what to do to keep it protected. Its bargain is, keep me whole and intact or I swear we will pull this trigger together. If you have ever had to carry something above your shoulders for any period, you know its fucking exhausting, and on top of that you need to respond to the demands of your ego to be loyal, giving, generous, and self sacrificing while holding it there. The essence of a co-dependent (blue pilled) relationship is for a guy to just be so relieved and happy to have finally found a woman who will give him some rest and support, and release him from that terrible burden, by holding that gun there for him.

Values like being a provider, loyal, self sacrificing and chivalrous, seem virtuous, but they are ego driven. Ego driven means a guy will take on an infinite amount of suffering before letting them go. The thing you would "die," or "kill yourself," if you ceased to be or became, is the lever they will pull to manipulate you. Those things are the bullets in the gun at your head. Once you know what those things are, the things the Ego is telling you to do that protect it while it marches you around - you can see when people reach for them. When you recognize your Ego as an external thing that you can survive and even thrive without, that's what it means to not give a fuck. One of the best things about reading all this stuff on the Red Pill is how funny it is to watch how people react when they realize the gun they've snatched and pointed at you isn't loaded.

Reality is, you can always live more happily without those conditions, no matter how noble you may think they are and how persuasive your Ego is, but when you are young (or BP'd) you don't know any better.

Friends whose self esteem has taken a poisonous blow won't do it for themselves anymore. That's the essence of that blow. It's not about being a pussy, bluepilled fag, it's that you have been psychologically poisoned by a parasitic mind, and you need time and space to recover before being able to fight for yourself. Friends provide that time and space.

As a friend to others now, I work every day to improve myself so that I can have the experience, credibility, and gravitas to be the friend I needed back then.

A big part of that is examining the things you think you would "die," without. The ones that are not physically true are the bullets in the gun your Ego has pointed at your head. You can't reason with it, or talk it out of pointing the gun at you, that is its nature and what it does. What changed my own life, which I hope you may also find, was the realization that the gun at my head (with the unreasonable demands) that had become so heavy and painful to carry, was empty.

Click.