Just a little story I'd like to share before I have a 21-way with my 20 HB9's....
-
-
Situation: Colleague and I are repairing a customer's equipment at the shop. Female Customer stops by to see how it's going.
-
XXcustomer: "This 'equipment' always makes me nervous. I've heard of stories where it malfunctions and harms or kills people."
-
Colleague: "I've worked on projects like these for years and never once have I encountered a situation that was dangerous. Logic logic logic"
-
Me: he doesnt 'get it'
-
(As expected of colleague's intergender dynamics failure)
-
XXcustomer: "Yeah but blah blah blah. It still scares me blah blah."
-
Colleague: "I have years of experience logic logic logic"
-
XXcustomer: "Idk, it's always made me feelz feelz feelz"
-
Me: Smh. Time to put an end to this.
Me: "Dont worry ma'am. We got it under control. You'll be okay (smirk)
-
XXcustomer: (Short sentence I dont remember. She seems less anxious, then walks away.)
-
-
Lesson: The female in question was feeling insecure. Then said female spoke it out in hopes a male figure would ease her anxiety. Bluepill colleague confronted this at face value and attempted to solve the problem. When women do this, she's not looking for you to solve the problem, she's deferring to you to solve the bad feelz. You do this by imposing a calm, secure frame over her. Women have weak frame, if at all. They seek to be consumed by a strong one (male) to provide them structure and emotional security. The frame acts like a blanket. Just like with infants, the blankee should be tight and snuggie to provide warmth and a perception of protection from scary things.
-
This is what it means to internalize "women are inferior." Her. an inferior, seeks a superior (male) to comfort them. Don't hamster this over the semantics.
-
Warlock's Law 11(added later): Don't solve the problem, solve the feelz.
-
This isnt monumental, and that's the point. It's the little things that add up over time. DHV here, shit test there. Kino here, frame there. Comfort test here, man shit there. These situations come up when you're not thinking about "trp" and rely on pure reflex. It's a test to see what you've internalized.
-
Now excuse me, I have a 21-way to do.
[deleted]
Spoopsnloops 9y ago
Plus by not explaining things you're avoiding the accusation of having mansplained.
[deleted]
[deleted] 9y ago
[deleted]
dr_warlock 9y ago
Your current programming, thus your instincts, your gut feeling, is wrong. When an event occurs, your body has an immediate reaction in the form of an emotion (habit) either through lack of practice or indoctrination. You then act reflexively on that emotion. To reprogram yourself, pause and don't immediately act on the first emotion that comes forth. Then logic your way through the situation because you can't trust your intuition. Letting the reaction emotion linger is very uncomfortable, but necessary. Just realize no one else can feel or see it. It's just you. During this time, come up with a better response and use it. After coming up with enough responses that work, you build up a bank. Your intuition will develop automatically and know how to sift through that 'response bank' quickly and efficiently without much conscious process (feeling).
-
Ignore reflex.
Logic.
Choose.
Act or don't
-
When you don't have a good response to a situation it's best to keep it simple, just good enough to get by. Sometimes doing nothing is the best response. Trying to be clever in the mist of this uncertainty will go badly.
[deleted] 9y ago
[deleted]
[deleted]
MattyAnon Admin 9y ago
She wants someone else to take the decision and all responsibility for that decision for her. The fear isn't about consequences it's about responsibility.
By saying you've got it under control, she's happy that she's no longer responsible for inconvenient things like thinking.
[deleted] 9y ago
Excellent emotional intelligence and empathy. It should be understood that emotions usually can't be diffused with logic and reason. They need dissimilar emotion to diffuse them. For instance, a big angry guy comes at you yelling in a bar, use humor (not making fun of him, but of the situation) to diffuse him. You can't explain to him how fighting is a bad idea. Also, unless he is bluffing, you can't use more anger/posturing to defeat him, it'll just lead to a fight. Opposing emotions are often what can diffuse undesired emotions in others.
[deleted] 9y ago
[deleted]
Auvergnat 9y ago
Oh it's not the end. She's going to build resentment. You are men, you are supposed to be supporting her, not the other way around. Women despise having to support men.
You should move your stuff away from her place. Don't owe her a thing. As for your sons: get them to do the job. That'll teach them some skills
circlhat 9y ago
What he said was pretty good
Honestly let's not over think things and act as if women are beacons of truth.
awalt_cupcake 9y ago
Did you just pass a comfort test with a non-plate?? Kidding.
I've noticed speaking logically is almost a foreign language to women. They don't know what to say next and they feel confused/insecure.
Arroway2357 9y ago
I've noticed that women frequently begin statements with, "I feel that..." or "I feel like..." I can think of two explanations for this: Either they're being more truthful than even they realize by admitting that their opinions are the result of feelings and not rational discernment or they're trying to frame the ensuing discussion in such a way that any disagreement can be made out to be a callous, unfair dismissal of her point of view.
dr_warlock 9y ago
This speech pattern is not of malicious intent, it's how they naturally speak .
Jakei34 9y ago
This would make sense. Try to comfort a female using logic and legit action, their emotions run higher and the hamster spins faster