I don't really know how to begin, this is more of just a ramble since I can't share this with anyone I know. Just kind of looking for advice/off my chest post.
23, ~140lbs, 5'11", just recently got going hard again in the gym after a back problem. 90% of my life I've been a social outcast. More introverted, hard for me to meet people. Not necessarily from being creepy, just kind of self destructive in a way, because most people I do talk to say they'd never think of me as shy or introverted. Let me say though that it's probably still damage from when my dad died when I was 11. Since then, I've grown up in a mom-and-sister household. No male role model essentially and, truthfully, I raised myself off early 2010s internet
Been with about 1 woman who pity fucked me shortly after high school when I went to a college in person. During that time I joined a frat, kind of broke out a bit and became social.
That was when I was 18. Didnt experience anything but a few flings in high school. Only hung out with drug using losers that were 3-4 years older than me during my youth too But since that first college I'm now doing online because I work full time to support myself. I've really only just worked and gone home since high school ended. I'm becoming seriously concerned that my "prime" is escaping me. The prime I didn't ever use. My irl friends who are my age, which is about 3 or 4 people, are all either states or cities away and we only see each other a couple times a year. I work in a hospital doing IT and my coworkers are all 40+ years old. Before this I was at a golf course with geezers and, again, people much older than me.
Fuck man. I just don't really know. My confidence for anything is just dead and buried. I don't meet anyone irl, and all I get on dating sites is fat fucking whales liking me every blue moon. It's at this point I don't even make eye contact with women irl because my confidence has been lowered so much. I don't try to befriend other guys because I'm just worlds different than most people my age. I've been honestly blackpilled for probably most of my life, but going to the gym helps a bit. My friends never give me advice for shit though they themselves are all getting laid and making friends, nor do they ever take me out to meet people. It's now bred some animosity on my end.
Again, this is more of an off my chest thing. Things my friends don't care to hear about and certainly not my coworkers. Does any of this ever get better? Or have I been damaged goods for far too long now? It's began to really feel like the latter.
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usec_1 2y ago
Motorcycles are cool. I'd know I'd be as good as dead on one though lol. I'm more into cars, but as you may have seen the used car market is disgusting right now. Piece of shit world needs to get a grip.
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usec_1 2y ago
I'm more into the JDM scene from the 80s and 90s. But I do like the newer mustangs and, really, anything from Dodge. Though what make motorcycles do you recommend?
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whytehorse2021 2y ago
Sounds like your typical skinny computer geek. Aspergers too probably. Eventually you'll hit the "fuck it" point, quit your shitty job, sell all your junk, jump on an airplane and fly across the world and fuck a bunch of hot Asian hoes and ladyboys.
usec_1 2y ago
Not a sperg but that's funny. Computer geek is accurate though. And I hate it but what do you do, all I can afford right now is a gym
whytehorse2021 2y ago
I had $5k in the bank and $20k in student loans when I gave up my life-long career in computers and said "fuck it! You Indian H1-B workers can have this shitty paying career. I'm going for the big bucks. I'm gonna be a teacher!". And then I became a teacher and I mastered education and then I taught myself how to master everything else and I put my dick in a lot of places and traveled the world and I could go on and on but the point is I put my dick in holes which never happened before. Just be careful of the scorpions if you go to Thailand.
mattyanon Admin 2y ago
How are you TRYING to meet people in real life? What are you doing, what's the results?
Forget online.
correct
yes, but YOU have to make it better
no
You need to find out what works for you.
But the bigger problem is that you have a negative mindset. "I am damaged / I can't / it doesn't work / it's not worth it".
I don't know how to fix that for you, but until you fix that nothing will work because you won't try and do/change anything.
usec_1 2y ago
I don't know how to meet people. Never have known how to. So I get no results. The friends I have don't take me anywhere with them or introduce me to other people either
JamesSkepp 2y ago
Are you take- or introduce-worthy? IOW do other people would like to meet you? Are you fun to be around, are you positive or are you, at least, not negative and not a downer to be around?
Stop focusing on the negatives at all. Stop going through scenarios "how bad you have it" and "how bad is it going to be" and "how bad did it went".
If you have to, fake it till you make it.
You have 3 choices abut that:
Despair that "your prime" is escaping and do nothing about it.
Ignore it, as it's always be there no matter how close or far you are from prime and no matter your age. Instead focus on getting better.
Use it as "fear of missing out/urgency" motivator to get better.
mattyanon Admin 2y ago
Well, that's totally 100% absolutely fucking normal. I get the same thing, and my friends worship me as some sort of hero.
Ok, you meet people like this:
It's that fucking simple.