Back story: Currently in the midst of a career upgrade and will be traveling quite a bit for work. When I get back to town I will be in a new tax bracket which means new toys, and new women. Basically, I've been letting my plates spin down and crash, but decided to spin one more up for the summer. The fact that I recently spent some time visiting my Aunt for the 4th and she shamed my strategy of pursuing younger women may or may not have something to do with that. To be fair my Aunt is fairly RP and feminine, but a bad divorce combined with having two daughters means the feminine imperative will always rear its ugly head.
Aunt: How are things? You seeing anyone? Blahblahblah (My Aunt is best friends with my ex-girlfriend's Aunt so she knows some of my dating history, and our families have been friends for decades. There's no incest, we think.)
SH: Good good, just been dating a little here and there.
Aunt: Any of them going to make the cut? You ever going to start a family?
SH: No Aunt Name, I will not be having any children, or getting married. The social climate has changed drastically and I cannot have what Grandpa had.
Aunt: That's too bad honey, you have to so much to offer as a father.
SH: I know, but it is just not a risk I am willing to take. Women and children are legal liabilities these days.
Aunt: What are you going to do?
SH: Casually date 18-23 year olds for the rest of my life.
Aunt: That's disgusting.
SH: Why?
Aunt: Because I have daughters.
SH: I'm not dating your daughters.
Aunt: But you're dating somebody's daughter.
SH: I'm always dating somebody's daughter. <sly grin>
Aunt: Don't you want someone closer to your age? That way you have more to talk about.
SH: Not really. You know I've tried dating women my age and it just isn't worth it. They've been through it all and the baggage shows with every year closer to 30. I don't really need to have deep conversations about geopolitics with her. My priorities are how attractive she is and how pleasant she is to be around, everything else is irrelevant.
Aunt: I guess, but that's still gross. You better not bring her around here! <laughs> She won't be much older than your little cousins!
SH: I'm not real concerned with the family's approval. These women aren't going to be around long enough regardless.
Aunt: <Shakes head and smiles> Alright honey.
Fast forward to last night and I head out to watch the fights (R.I.P. Silva) at one of my local watering holes and a very bubbly, feminine, and attractive blonde takes care of me.
Plate: Hi how are ya? Can I get you started with a drink?
SH: Iced tea and keep'em coming, and I think I am going to eat.
Plate: Need a menu?
SH: Nope, Shepherd's pie.
Plate: Alright I'll put that right in.
Smiles and steady eye contact right from the get go. I know I am going to be here for several hours as it is around 7PM and the main event isn't going to be until midnight so I take it real slow. For the rest of the night my Iced Tea rarely even hits halfway and we banter back and forth about the other patrons. One of her tables has a bunch of HOO-RAH Marines who are randomly barking and just being obnoxious. One of them ends up puking so she stops by and we bullshit some about that. She sits down at one point and we talk about the fights as I had mentioned that's the main reason I was here, and had her change the channel to the preliminaries on the TV closest to me.
SH: Big fight tonight. I'm pumped for Silva.
Plate: My ex-boyfriend did that whole cage fighting thing, so I actually know who Silva is!!
SH: Well, you should cheer for him because I am.
Plate: Definitely!!
A few hours go by of more back and forth and she sits down to chat yet again. This is where it gets interesting. A very nice fella sits down next to her, introduces himself, offers a handshake and does the "I have your hand so now you have to talk to me" routine. She immediately goes into full rejection mode.
Beta: I'd love to take you out some time, yadda yadda, dinner, movie, etc.
Plate: I have a boyfriend.
Beta: Damage control, etc.
Plate: I have been cheated on by all of my boyfriends so I'm not ok with going out with other guys.
Beta: Ok
He leaves, she sits there and gives me the "OMG" look and I start laughing.
SH: Well, he gets an E for effort.
Plate: Yeah, E for effort is right.
SH: Well, at least he tried right?
Plate: Yeah... I guess.
We both laugh and she heads out again. I could just imagine that "nice guy" being me a decade earlier and if I was a nice person I may have actually felt something watching him crash and burn. Based on our conversation earlier I am fairly positive she does not, in fact, have a boyfriend. Not that it would really matter anyway, but that is one less shit test to crush. Fights end, I'm pissed, so even though I do not normally drink I order one anyway to mourn the end of Silva's dynasty. Plate sits down again to chat.
SH: So I'm betting you don't actually have a boyfriend.
Plate: Nope.
SH: <Laughs> That felt like "I don't really have a boyfriend, but you're not going to be my boyfriend, so I am going to tell you I have a boyfriend."
Plate: Exactly. My ex cheated on me and we broke up a while back and just recently stopped talking so I am really just interested in focusing on me, some self-improvement is in order.
SH: I get it. I am kind of in a similar place because my ex was quite high maintenance and couldn't deal with a man who actually has spine.
Shared sob stories and just a tiny bit of beta to establish rapport. Woe is us, our exes are evil. We banter a little bit more and she heads off to eat a salad. Good girl. Half hour or so goes by and I am ready to head out, so I decide to close it.
<Hands Plate my phone>
SH: Put your number in here. I know you said earlier you were in a weird space but I'm not really the kind of guy to buy you flowers and take you out to dinner, but you seem cool and I like cool people.
By displaying that I have more options than the "nice guy" who hit on her just 30 minutes earlier I have instantly piqued her interest, the hamster does the rest.
Plate: <Enters number in phone> You do seem cool and you're really easy to talk to.
I pay my tab, wish her well, and head on home.
About an hour or so later I send her a text.
SH: Plate, SH here. Figured I would shoot you a text so when you get a phone call this week it isn't just some random number.
This is what is known as a "confirmation text" and it is very important to avoid the reset. If you're not familiar with a reset it boils down to this. Women, especially attractive women get so much attention your head would explode. After a decade+ of dating them I've seen it all. From the dozens of messages they get daily on social media, texting, and in real life from orbiters and men hitting on them constantly. My theory is that the reset is a coping mechanism. These broads are getting sensory overload with all this attention, so their attention spans are very short and they tend to "reset" on what seems like a daily basis. Anything that happened in the past is nearly forgotten and they tend to only live in the moment. By sending the confirmation text I carve out a little bit of territory in her brain, set the expectation for my next escalation, and avoid the reset. Now, I'm in my early 30's and have some "old school" strategies that work for me. I despise using strictly text to communicate with women because my sense of humor is extremely deadpan, sarcastic, and uses a lot of subtlety which doesn't always translate well via text. I prefer phone calls, but do whatever works for you. Basically, that will be the last text I send her until absolutely necessary for logistics.
Just got a reply a few hours ago.
Plate: Mkay. Lol your added SH! (:
A "Lol", the incorrect usage of you're, and a smilie. I <3 twenty year olds. Although, I really wish she didn't have a bunch of visible tattoos. When are these dames going to learn you don't put bumper stickers on a Ferrari? Ahh well, what are ya gonna do?
Conclusion: It doesn't matter if she has a boyfriend, tells some other guy she has a boyfriend, or is actually married. If she is attracted enough to you she will do whatever you want. Raise your SMV, learn to hold your space well and pace conversations. Escalate properly and never listen to what a woman says, watch how she says it. She even caught me starting at her tits a few times and I would just make eye contact and smile. None of it matters, none of it. Your attraction level dictates the vast majority of how any encounter plays out and it is your job to steer it in the desired direction. Non-verbal cues are huge and I could tell based on her randomly checking me out, constantly sitting down to chat, and general friendly attitude that she was interested.
Where will SH meet up with his newest plate to begin the escalation process? What will SH's Aunt say when she finds out he conquered a woman over a decade his junior in her honor? Find out next time on "As The Harem Turns."

redpillschool Admin 12y ago
Easy mode, she didn't give you any bitch shield? Clean off your couch, I'm booking a flight.
SoftHarem 12y ago
Zero bitch shield. She powered up for the beta and I just crushed what little was left.
MockingDead 12y ago
I was going to sleep on his couch!
SoftHarem 12y ago
It is big enough to share.
MockingDead 12y ago
I would love there to be an on location Red Pill Academy.
SoftHarem 12y ago
We've talked about it, and who knows what can happen in a few years. I'm going to be living quite well with the career change and no family, so we'll see.
MockingDead 12y ago
I believe I could be Guidance Counselor... I am about that level right now... But I plan to be a Grade A Prof in 2 years.
[deleted] 12y ago
I like the way you write. You're not a freshman English major unlike most redditors - you're succinct. Right on
SoftHarem 12y ago
'Preciate ya
redpillschool Admin 12y ago
Here SoftHarem, have some ego. lol
SoftHarem 12y ago
SUNS OUT GUNS OUT BROSKI
favours_of_the_moon 12y ago
Not even bullshitting.
If my aunt told me I was gross and tried to shame me, I would TOTALLY fuck her daughters.
Then her. lol
SoftHarem 12y ago
While I do have some ancestors from the deep south we've kind of moved away from that whole incest thing, but hey, do what ya gotta do cousin fucker.
favours_of_the_moon 12y ago
Hahaha, I just don't care for putdowns.
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DaveYarnell 12y ago
Hahaha why do you like the 20 year olds so much? They get on my nerves! I definitely appreciate the story though.
SoftHarem 12y ago
Young, near SMV peak age, full of hope and optimism and often times very feminine, neoteny, usually just starting out on the carousel so low risk of baggage, STIs, etc.
AlwaysLateToThreads 12y ago
I think a more entertaining title of this series would be, "As The Hamster Turns."
SoftHarem 12y ago
Next time don't be so fucking late and I'll think about it.
AlwaysLateToThreads 12y ago
I get called out for being early, and now I'm called out for being late. I just can't win.
I hope your Aunt scolds you.
SoftHarem 12y ago
Does that make your vagina ache a little?
Her reaction after telling her I conquered a 20 year old is going to be glorious.
AlwaysLateToThreads 12y ago
A slight tingle.
And who knows, maybe you found a Unicorn and this could be your future wife! Aunt Harem would be very pleased.
SoftHarem 12y ago
She said she has only had two boyfriends throughout high school and she is just recently single. This leads me to believe her partner count is in the single digits, and after hearing that it basically pushed me to close her. She is definitely a Unicorn and I can feel my oneitis kicking in already.
AlwaysLateToThreads 12y ago
She can be your gold-rimmed plate.
SoftHarem 12y ago
I'm all about pseudo-girlfriends.
AlwaysLateToThreads 12y ago
Does it hurt when you break up with your psuedo-girlfriends?
SoftHarem 12y ago
It hurt when I broke up with my real girlfriends but since I don't have those anymore I sleep like a baby.
[deleted] 12y ago
Great stuff. Detailed Field Reports like this help me almost more than anything.
[deleted] 12y ago
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SoftHarem 12y ago
At least... 5-6 glasses, then a real Iced Tea after Silva lost. Top shelf Long Island. I probably hit the head a good 6-7 times.
[deleted] 12y ago
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SoftHarem 12y ago
I've given up all my old vices sans caffeine and nicotine so I'm drinking coffee and/or Iced Tea all day long.
fuk_offe 12y ago
So true... I think it gives such a slutty look, oh well...
SoftHarem 12y ago
Good thing I love sluts, and we don't shame them 'round these parts!
[deleted] 12y ago
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SoftHarem 12y ago
Despite the stigma and shaming from American society at large you can absolutely date 18-23 year olds in your 30s and beyond. Attractive American women are so fucking tired of supplicating beta males they could spit, you see it everywhere you look. To be fair I may or may not have a baby face which may or may not have completely avoided the "how old are you?" shit test.
SupALupRT 12y ago
know that feel. 33, look 23, its sooooooooooooooooo nice.
RedSunBlue 12y ago
i.e., be Asian.
RedSunBlue 12y ago
I lol'd.
CodeineCowboy 12y ago
One of the few people in my early 20's who actually openly despises tattoos on women. Couldn't think of a better way to describe it. Seriously, that shit is distracting why ruin a good body/good skin.
redpillschool Admin 12y ago
We had a discussion about it during the early days of theredpill, and I think the consensus is that it's less attractive on women because it's a signal of risk taking, which is negative in women (men prefer women who do not appear to take risks), whereas women find it attractive in men because risk-taking men are sexy.
omnicrontau 12y ago
Seems the other guy failed simply because she wasn't attracted to him more than anything else.
Be attractive, don't be unattractive and all that.
lono12 12y ago
Exactly! This site has torn down a lot of delusions but the biggest one of all is that you can overcome ugliness with game. The science disproves it, and real world experience disproves it.
I've seen time and time again the most beta guys win the girl (against alphas and guys on juice) just because they were handsome. I'm willing to bet the biggest variable here was the the attractiveness of the two men. If Bradley cooper had sat down and asked for her number I think she would have been a little more cooperative.
Women choose with their vaginas. If she hadn't wanted you to spit game you would not have even gotten a foot inside the door.
yankeetiger 12y ago
Is there really any other reason for failure, ever?
omnicrontau 12y ago
Seems to be a lot of talk that if you act in the right way how you look doesn't matter but I'm kinda skeptical, it at least helps a lot.
yankeetiger 12y ago
Well the mantra "Be attractive" applies to more than just looks- otherwise the mantra would be "Be good-looking".
Attraction is not only your looks, but your charisma, your confidence, and a host of other factors. Of course looks matter- anyone who says they don't is a damn fool- but the overarching point is that looks are not the only component of attraction
SoftHarem 12y ago
That is basically it. The difference is most men just rationalize this as "I'm not attractive." and go on to be Omegas. Granted I don't exactly have ugly parents, but Game and SMV are life long endeavors. You have to perfect your craft daily and it is absolutely something that can be learned and internalized.
johnsmith66 12y ago
I don't like to be argumentative, but she only gave you her number because you're good looking. The Beta was rejected because he's ugly.
The first and only rule of dating is "Be attractive, don't be unattractive." Having Game can help a little, but an ugly guy has little chance of getting a hot girl's number unless he is really rich.
SoftHarem 12y ago
He wasn't ugly, actually, she just wasn't attracted to him because he didn't present himself very well both in style and demeanor.
So you do admit that status and game can overcome genetics?
johnsmith66 12y ago
Yes, that can help somewhat. But, a guy who is very unattractive will need to have a lot of money to attractive pretty women. Donald Trump, for example, is not a good looking man, but he regularly dates super models. Why? Because he has billions of dollars.
Now, I wasn't there, and I don't know what this Beta did. However, I do know that good looks will help you with women tremendously. Guys who are really good looking don't even need Game. All that they have to do is say, "Hi" to women, and women will swoon.
ilikeeatingbrains 12y ago
Omega?
SoftHarem 12y ago
Low value man who doesn't want to learn Game or improve his SMV for whatever reason.
ilikeeatingbrains 12y ago
I see I have some reading to catch up on. Sigma for the win.
SoftHarem 12y ago
I'm cool with Sigmas and probably lean just as deep into that spectrum as I do with Alphas.
http://talkaboutmarriage.com/mens-clubhouse/69424-sigma-male.html#post1529385
This is a pretty solid resource.
ilikeeatingbrains 12y ago
Indeed!
iKill_eu 12y ago
What else would you say he did wrong?
I mean I get the whole "he was beta" thing, it sets a nice picture, but was there anything in particular that he did wrong?
SoftHarem 12y ago
Shoddy haircut, sloppily dressed, cold called her, pandered to her, and was brown.
[deleted] 12y ago
As a brown guy, I don't get offended. I know things the way they are and play best with what I have. To be offended is to waste your time, especially with white girls.
SoftHarem 12y ago
Well aren't you right at home in TRP.
[deleted] 12y ago
There goes that cheeky sarcasm!
SoftHarem 12y ago
Nah it was a compliment. You accept that the deck is stacked against you when dealing with white women because of their perfectly legitimate racial preference, yet you don't piss and moan and instead modify your strategy accordingly.
magicalbird 12y ago
As a fellow ethnic minority how would you describe in detail playing with the best you have?
RedSunBlue 12y ago
You'd be surprised at how many white girls have a thing for East Asians.
[deleted] 12y ago
Finding girls within my own community/race/nationality/middle eastern. Scouting around for girls that are more open to minorities, maybe even try and play up my exotic card. But definitely my most luck has come from girls in my own people's group.
magicalbird 12y ago
What area are you from? I am pretty sure it depends on the area as well for openness to outsider's groups. I do notice the most receptive girls are in your in group but a good portion of women are neutral to out groups meaning they will give you a chance if your game is legit. Own people's group can also include subculture to downplay the race
[deleted] 12y ago
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SoftHarem 12y ago
It is a racial comment and she was a little white girl from the suburbs. They tend to have very strict dating preferences and are perfectly entitled to them.
magicalbird 12y ago
ok clarified
[deleted] 12y ago
Aw, how PC of you!
Kidding.
If the brown guy dressed nicely (the MFA uniform for e.g, which is probably not as generic out there in the real world), had a sharp haircut, made use of good body language, and didn't talk like a dickhead, being brown could actually work in his favour.
He would automatically be behaving in ways that were not expected of him.
FWIW: I'm a brown (light brown, but brown nonetheless) guy of Indian origin (i.e, great great great grandfathers are from India? yeah, I think I got that right) and my personal preference is for mixed race and white girls. I rarely find Asian, black or Indian girls attractive.
Edit:
I think I may be on thin ice here, based on the sub's views with respect to race. If inappropriate, please remove it. Or let me know, and I will.
SoftHarem 12y ago
Race is fine, and it can be a key component in attraction. Talking about race is also fine, but implying one is superior or inferior to the other is where we draw the line. Saying "White women typically don't date brown men." is true, and backed up by statistics, yet a far cry from "Brown men are inferior and that's why white women don't usually date them." One is racial, while the other is racist. Personally, I have "dated" almost every color there is and I plan on getting to the rest in the upcoming years.
[deleted] 12y ago
Cool.
Nice.
Have something similar in mind. I'll probably get my Indian (or of Indian origin) notch here but I doubt I will the rest, unless I luck out or lower my standards.
CodeineCowboy 12y ago
Right on, growing up in one of the rare areas in the U.S. where brown people (mainly Mexicans) dominate the population and whites are a true minority a lot of hate is directed at whites and they are generally treated as the outsider group, so I grew up thinking Mexican chicks or even Asians for the most part didn't want to date us white guys with the way I hear Mexicans talk about white people in such stereotypical fashion. But my experience has been entirely different, they love us white dudes, mainly if we're actually chill enough to fit in with their subcultures.
[deleted] 12y ago
Nice.
New Mexico? A California suburb or something, I'm guessing? Never been to the US, but I used to binge on TV shows, up until recently.
CodeineCowboy 12y ago
California, yep. In one of the poorer areas composed of mainly farmworkers, and people who buy houses here because the property value is extremely cheap and then commute to different areas because the unemployment is extremely high.
omnicrontau 12y ago
Not sure how receiving daily rejection for not being born good looking actually helps no matter how good you are at 'game.'
redpillschool Admin 12y ago
It's true that looks have an effect. The problem is, there's no way of knowing how much your looks are having an effect, and how much it's your attitude. Other than getting into shape and having a good haircut, there's not much you can do to change your looks- so that's why good game advocates pushing forward like you look good.
Basically it means, let her say no, don't do it for her. I'm regularly surprised when women who are high on the scale tell me I'm hot. I'd never think we'd pair up. I just act like I'm hot and I get into places I had no idea I could.
If I had thought it through, I'd probably not have approached half the girls I have because I didn't think I was good enough looking.
SoftHarem 12y ago
This sounds like a defeatist mentality. I've seen conventionally unattractive men pull quality tail. Status and Game can make up for a bad gene lottery ticket. Don't get me wrong, looks are hugely important but they can be overcome more so as a man than as a woman. Ugly women are almost universally doomed to ugly men, but the reverse is not true.
omnicrontau 12y ago
When things are this badly rigged its hard not to have a defeatist mentality. But I guess so.
SoftHarem 12y ago
No one gives a shit about your happiness except you, and this sub is designed to turn you into a high value person. Man up, son.
omnicrontau 12y ago
This subreddit teaches that nobody can ever be happy and all you can hope for is a string of meaningless sex, so not really.
SupALupRT 12y ago
have you ever had sex with a hot girl? Notbad.jpg definitely not meaningless.
RedSunBlue 12y ago
PROTIP: When you see defeatists sad sacks like omnicrontau spewing their negativity in the comments here:
(Prep) Download and install the Reddit Enhancement Suite
Click the little tag icon to the right of the Negative Nancy's username.
In the space next to "Tag", write "Whiney Bitch"
SoftHarem 12y ago
I like it, and have a flowchart of my own.
Click mod
The end.
[deleted]
SoftHarem 12y ago
Sure.
MockingDead 12y ago
You gave it a go man. People won't see until they want to see.
My life ain't much better than omnicrontau but I will be damned if I am gonna stop fighting.
omnicrontau 12y ago
k
Ragna_The_Blood_Edge 12y ago
You're going beta on us.
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HumanSockPuppet 12y ago
Feels like this needs a 60s-Batman style announcer. I'll start the casting call.
Great FR. You discussed the little things, and the little things are what matter most.
SoftHarem 12y ago
I definitely threw in as many nuances as I could and tried to make it as entertaining as possible so we don't delve into Seddit-style "lolz I got a number now pat me on the back." type FRs. If it feels that way let me know and I'll nuke it.
VZPurp 12y ago
Do they really pat themselves on the back for getting a number? You can get that pretty much instantly and without much effort O_o
I've never failed to get a number.
SoftHarem 12y ago
It is a big deal to the rookies, but I consider TRP more in the advanced stages of Game, and yes, yes they do. Regardless, we do have a lot of new members and this is a fraternity where we share the knowledge with all skill levels.
VZPurp 12y ago
Word
Knight_of_autumn 12y ago
Why do you not want to ever have kids? I feel like the world could use more genes from people who are are better suited awaken from Blue Pill existence and take their lives into their own hands.
SoftHarem 12y ago
The currents laws on the books are completely broken and I am not willing to risk my empire.
Knight_of_autumn 12y ago
I see your point. Also, how do you deal with younger girls that you do not have much in common with? I am a huge nerd and the "hot girls" I run into tend to be either intimidated by my conversations (apparently my standard vocabulary is "advanced" for people?) and I could not care less for most banal things girls talk about. I can leave my general interests to discuss with friends, but what the hell do I talk to girls about? I can only appeal to their personality for so long before I get bored and zone out.
SoftHarem 12y ago
I am not interested in long term commitment so I keep the conversation light and upbeat. Tease them, joke with them, but there's no need to get into our childhoods or our hopes and dreams. If you are looking for a LTR your strategy would obviously be a bit different, but I am not the best person to ask as I have only had a handful of them.
Knight_of_autumn 12y ago
That's fine, your reply was helpful to me. Thank you for taking the time to write it. EDIT: Most of my friends are the How I Met Your Mother - kind of gang. If I went the PUA route, I would be the Barney in the group and really stand out. I am not sure if I want a LTR or not. I have had three before and have enjoyed them at the time, but eventually grew bored of spending time with the same girl and her problems.
mrust 12y ago
Thanks for the FR, really appreciate these. I will be adding the confirmation text to my arsenal. Already found that re-confirming a few hours before the first meet cuts down on flakes, and this also sounds like it will be helpful.
SoftHarem 12y ago
Glad it was useful. I realize this post boils down to just a number but I've seen a lot of men asking specific questions on mechanics so I figured I could throw in a bunch of supporting tips and make a FR out of it.
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