Had “the talk” with my favorite plate. Obviously I bought time as I don’t want to drop my roster right now. Still, I like her a lot and I am inclined to vet her more and if everything is right start an LTR with said girl.
She’s aware of my sexual life, never told her directly, but she knows I get regular action.
We are clearly spending more time together and she’s putting up effort, paying for dates, fucking and sucking me right and basically being available 24/7 to spend time with me.
I don’t care about body count and as Rollo said nobody should care. What she does tho is referring to her past by making slick comments about the fact that she used to get action or that she can get it whenever. Usually after she feels like I’m kind of distant. One time she found a used condom (my bad) inside the bathroom and she clearly was pissed off and after a little she started boasting about having needs to and she has sex. I know for a fact she’s only seeing me tho at the moment. I’m seeing other 3 women in the meantime.
I don’t really like it and I would like her to stop. Obviously I never reacted negatively I usually brush it off or reply with playful banter about it because I approach it as a shit test.
Anyways I find it kind of sad and would like her to stop how to approach this situation and make her stop while maintaining frame?
My idea: She’s shit testing me or she’s insecure about my ability to get women so she has to “one up” me in some way so that she can signal to me that men want her or wanted her. But I don’t care I just find it sad and kind of disgusting. Maybe I should just tell her directly?
mattyanon Admin 3d ago
Tell her "I don't care about your body count, but I don't need to hear the details".
First-light 2 1w ago
She wants to secure a better deal. She would like to be exclusive. She is not sure how to negotiate this.
You have a choice -grant her exclusivity or live with this until she probably breaks it off eventually when she realises that a better deal is not on the table.
If you want to enjoy the benefits of fucking her till she breaks it off, you may have to tolerate this. Putting your foot down may make her quieter but will also probably accelerate her deciding that she needs to look for a better deal because it emphasises the weakness of her position -she will see more clearly that she has only two eventual choices -shut up and take the dick or quit.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
I just went through something similar last year. I kept hearing how she could have anyone etc and i couldn't take it on a trip of all places
I didn't care that she did a lot right, I was sick of that attitude.
Save yourself the headache, this is not femine behavior worthy of a relationship
Yes it does, but more importantly body quality. I'd rather a girl have fucked 5 losers than one life shattering ex. Yes it matters and don't let someone ever tell you a girl's past isn't important. It absolutely is
GeorgeIII 1 1w ago
Women are the gatekeepers of sex, men are the gatekeepers of relationships.
Whenever you do one little random thing “wrong”, a woman is free to, and usually feels justified to turn you down for sex, no matter how small. You could’ve made one bad joke, made one weird smile, said one thing she didn’t like, took her to one place she didn’t enjoy for a date, etc.
For a woman trying to get you in a relationship, you can apply the same. A committed relationship will be your cost of time and effort, your options (plates) surrendered. So if there’s one thing you don’t like, you are entirely justified (and we here will encourage you) to leave. If you choose to commit and stay, the costs become your problem, not hers, not ours, not society’s. Your costs.
This isn’t to say you should for sure not be in a relationship with her. It’s up to you to decide if it’s worth it. If you think this is too stupid to deal with, leave. And if you think it can be managed well and to your benefit, stay.
———
On a side note, this sounds like another woman with shitty lady game. She thinks that because you have options, she needs to show she could fuck whoever the hell else to get you to commit. She believes she is demonstrating high value (being in demand), but in a man’s eye she is demonstrating disloyalty.
And she does not understand (or perhaps she doesn’t care to understand) what the tradeoff is for you (giving up your other plates and your time). Instead she is thinking about you as she would herself. Solipsism 101.
You are absolutely right she is insecure. But the way she is going about doing this is just so… stupid.
Hugo_The_Great 6d ago
100% this.
Have had lots of (young) women who tried to win me over/impress me/create rapport by telling me about stuff they did with past guys...
Overkill_Engine Endorsed Contributor 1w ago
Given how many women are only as loyal as their current options...same picture, really. But never expect them to directly admit to that. Less men would let themselves be exploited if they did.
Some men might be tempted to give her some slack for bad lady-game, but really men should be even more ruthless than women when it comes to fucking up game. If no other reason than she would feel absolutely no qualms about doing the same or worse to a man that fucked up his game, as noted above. Trying to fix/teach adult women anything is usually a loser's game; they'll resent you for being right even if they comply and it'll be an unending battle against them backsliding at best.
Me personally, if I am going to waste my time, it's going to be on something I actually enjoy.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
This is a good point
Autistic male game would be ruthlessly punished...
Yet men give retarded female game a pass
Why?
She is demonstrating that she can't even commit to the bare minimum of social presentation required to demonstrate a public grace and competency as a woman
Why is this given a pass? It shouldn't be
Overkill_Engine Endorsed Contributor 1w ago
I'm a firm proponent of what is "wrong" with women is mostly a lack of accountability being imposed upon them. Just ends up teaching them the wrong lessons - that they can be fuckups and still get what they want.
Men metaphorically and literally should have "dis stoopid bitch" and a boot to to the curb reactions on a hair trigger. Exclusion is going to be more effective on a woman than direct correction/instruction anyways, plus also has the benefit of "not my problem anymore".
GeorgeIII 1 1w ago
Correct. The reason I have improved anything at all was that I was not good enough for any positive outcomes.
If men get more choosy, women will have to do something besides spread their legs.
I just don’t see it happening anytime soon. Until then, retard game and bad relationship value are on the menu.
Musicgoon78 3 1w ago
None of this is on you. She's insecure and you need to simply lay out boundaries for her calmly. The question is what do you want to be the consequences of violating these boundaries? The simplest answer is withdraw your presence and time.
She can't handle you having options. She's definitely trying to compete with you.