So we all say "do for yourself, not for girls". I saw why in my personal life. But what to do when things i enjoy are either solo activities or "at home" ones?
Let's say i want to meet people. I dislike crowded places. When in the gym, i want to workout. So i'll need to do random things for other people, taking with me the "starving dude" vibe. And solo because my friends are all caged by wives. They don't walk two steps without them.
For ex. I was thinking about joining Crossfit, a Dance or Trekking groups for socializing. But i know (we know) it's for woman. How do i enjoy life this way?
There is a video where Bronn and Jaime Lannister are talking about "an army of men without cocks". And it's very reality-check. All we do is pussy-driven.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAMYXp8jE9o&pp=ygUSQXJteSBlaXRob3V0IGNvY2tz
First-light 2 12h ago
I think the solution to enjoying life while taking part in some activities that women like (which tend to be group ones) is to consider the setting carefully. What setting personally gives you less hassle?
Is it for example a medium sized group where people know each other well but where there is an established hierarchy and bitching or a large fairly nameless group where people churn through?
You will want to be mostly enjoying yourself or you won't find it easy to come across at your best and another worthwhile consideration is whether you will be meeting women in this group that you can actually hold a conversation with that interests you at all.
Some groups splinter off into smaller ones easily -like the trekking option. Here you may be able to go in a big group to find like minded people to go somewhere interesting with.
Another option is to find a small venue and gradually become a local expert in it. This can feel more like home and like you care about things.
In the end it will be down to your personal ability to enjoy a situation and experiment will probably be valuable -if you don't enjoy it after a few goes, just stop.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1d ago
This doesn't make sense at all
Many solo activities can scale to group
GeorgeIII 1d ago
Rollo actually has a less-read post on this topic.
https://therationalmale.com/2015/03/01/the-isolationists/
TLDR: there needs to be some balance of indifference to women and a numbers approach. Taking one of these approaches too far will fail you. So it’s ok to do activities to meet women, as long as it’s not your main/only priority.
My personal opinion on “should I do this to get women?” is that you should do it, if it inherently benefits you.
Examples of good things to do to get women: go to the gym (CrossFit for example), learn social dancing, become wealthier. All of these things improve you inherently, even if you strike out on the girls. Gym will make you look and feel better, social dancing will teach you a skill to be more charming, and being wealthier buys a better lifestyle for yourself.
Examples of bad things to do to get women: buying chicks flowers, texting the same girl all day, and joining an astrology meetup. Buying girls flowers is betabuxxing and will leave you poorer, texting the same girl all day distracts you, and astrology is total bullshit.
In your case, I think the CrossFit gym is actually a great idea. And if you have any other hobbies that you enjoy and ALSO have women, definitely keep pursuing these hobbies.
And last thing, I recall you are 35 right? So you might just have to spend less time with your married friends and make more single friends. Most likely your friends are betatized, so even if you did hang out with them they will not be helpful in getting you laid. Men who don’t understand game can’t help you game.
SwarmShawarma 1d ago
They can have friends looking for a man. The rest I agree with.
To OP. going to work is not only benefiting who you work for. Working sole trader is not only benefiting people receiving a service.
Even when you are in LTR you can do something like buying flowers, as long as she deserved it 2fold.
You need to deal with people anyway to have /keep a social acumen with women and men.
GeorgeIII 1d ago
I don’t disagree with your point that married guy friends could know single women, via their wives.
But most of those women will themselves be looking to get married ASAP as well, since women just want what their friends want.
Overkill_Engine Endorsed Contributor 1d ago
Even that you have to be super careful with. Many friends aren't very good at the label (blue pill) and will choose candidates based on their perceptions and social convenience (like staving off the wife's nagging to set her friend up) instead of whether said candidate is actually a worthwhile match for you.
Basically, expect any matches to be incredibly hypergamous and very NOT in your favor. Single moms, charity cases, fat chungus bitches that can't get approaches outside of a 4-H show or last call at a bar, etc.
The other layer to the onion is when things don't work out and you have to dump them and if they were associated with your social circle, now you have to manage any fallout. Bleh.
SwarmShawarma 1d ago
Assumption is more or less, these are mates (not really friends as you shouldn't care are they blue as other things more important ties one with them) and are not of much value in "new" life if they will be disposed off anyway. Backslash generally not important then.
it is not going on the blind dates but asking for their pictures or right out about specific person. Never happened to me to go totally blind.
These are women. They want things, more important question is do you want to give. You're not a victim on a date.
@georgelll