Hi everyone, I’m Jadon. My girlfriend and I have been together a little over a year. We don’t fight much, and on the surface things look stable. The problem is more subtle and that’s what’s confusing me. She’s very supportive of my goals, but only when they align with how she thinks my life should look. For example, when I talk about changing careers or taking a creative risk, she doesn’t say “don’t do it.” Instead, she starts helping in a way that slowly pushes me toward safer, more conventional choices. It’s like my decisions get rewritten as “our decisions,” even when I never asked for that. What really bothered me recently was realizing I’ve started editing myself before talking to her. I avoid bringing up certain ideas because I already know how the conversation will end, with me feeling small but unable to point to anything clearly wrong she said. She insists she’s just being realistic and caring, and maybe she is. But I miss feeling like my life is actually mine. How do you tell the difference between a partner who’s genuinely looking out for you and one who, unintentionally or not, is shaping you into someone more comfortable for them? And if you’re already in that gray zone, what’s the healthiest way to address it without turning it into a fight?