Am kind of oneitis-y about this one, but she's the only woman that really thrills me atm so idc (plus I have 2 other plates).
Cold approached her on campus about a year ago. She was receptive but something felt off – later found out she'd been lowkey stalking me and gathering info through friends. Didn't ask for her number, nothing came of it.
Backstory: there's this circle of a gay dude and some girls who have a weird fixation on me. One of my plates used to be close with them and told stories about me being toxic and messing with other women etc., and they literally made dick-shaped cookies with my name on them. Girl in question runs in that circle.
Her pattern is weird as fuck. She'd sometimes secretly follow me on campus, position herself near me, but then act like I don't exist. I ignored her back. Then we had a random 1-on-1 encounter and suddenly she's receptive, flirty. It's like she's embarrassed to show interest publicly, but the second we're actually talking she flips a switch.
My fuckup: later that day she posted in a group chat we're both in. I wrote her a message to say hi, maybe it was a bit too cocky, low effort, I got no reply. Summer break started right after so I figured shoot my shot, but yeah, shouldn't have.
Few months later we end up in the same class. Started cold with her clearly ignoring me, but gradually warmed up, now I catch her glancing at me regularly. I just mirror whatever energy she gives.
Where do I go from here? Am I crazy for thinking this is just ASD because of my reputation (and her probably thinking I'm in a LTR with that plate)? Do I just hold frame, mind my business, and wait for her to show actual open interest?
Attempt to answer own Q: Think I just need to stay patient and keep doing what I'm doing. Maybe try to create more 1 on 1 moments. No more DMing obviously
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 23h ago
You're not going to like this, but she seems like more trouble than any sex is worth.
That cookie thing? Simultaneously childish and psychotic.
First-light 2 21h ago
There is some strange shit going on here. What is clear is that she is not attracted to you in a normal way. It might be her way is not normal or it might be she is only vaguely interested. It could be the hive has vetoed you as a bad guy? Whatever it is, it would at best be messy.
If she is interested, she will let you know by making herself available to talk to and then being receptive to your conversation. If not, just smile and carry on, safe from a messed up life.
qzone 21h ago
If you're on a college campus with any reasonable population, your opportunity cost is too great to waste too much time on this chick. Lift, read, approach, and work social circle game playing it slower than not. Just as she is hot and you cold approached her, you can cold approach a hot girl that is actually a "yes" girl. I'm sure you won't be worried about her and the oneitis will magically fade away when a rocket is bouncing up and down on your member. I'm guessing your plates are not nearly as hot as this girl. The plate wanted to ruin your reputation because she's salty you aren't hers exclusively, they made a negative typecast of you in their circle, and because of that, this girl will probably never pursue you despite attraction because girls are quite a bit more concerned with reputation and the hive than men are.
If it is a smaller college, this group is likely to be negative for your reputation on campus. Your best bet is to distance from them, not interact with them, and let their weird ideas about you disappear with time. Further, I would set a boundary with the plate about spreading bad rumors about you. Don't worry about pissing her off, she'll find it sexy. If she won't abide by the boundary, then cut her off. There are tens of millions of attractive young single women on the planet, more than you could ever realistically approach in your whole life. The two girls you talked about sound like drama you don't need.
One more thing, in general, if it is any amount of a small campus, I wouldn't DM girls at all unless you have some insane clouted Instagram or something. Just too easy to be screenshotted and then you come off as thirsty.
mattyanon Admin 17h ago
Girl is fucked up
ogrilla99 2h ago
Another thing to add, if you are in America, this girl is dangerous to pursue. My guess is that even if she's interested in you, she will not go against the hive, who is already primed to view you as a douchebag. Let's say you hook up with her, maybe even plate her, but eventually, unless you marry her, you guys will break up. What happens then?
A girl as crazy as sending you dick-shaped cookies (seriously? They took the time to bake something, for someone they ostensibly don't like? That's weird) means you run a serious risk of her declaring after the fact that she never consented and was pressured into sex with you. And her hive will agree with her. And you know where that goes...
No girl is worth being expelled for, or catching a sex offender label for the rest of your life. Things are already risky in modern college dating even when the girl is relatively normal. Sticking your dick in crazy takes on extra risks in a college environment where the rule of law doesn't apply (seriously: university sexual assault boards were specifically required to be created as conditions of federal funding when the powers that be decided the cops were not arresting enough rapists in college, of which they knew there must be many because other feminists were screeching about the epidemic of rape on campus).
It's probably best to pursue other women who are not already primed to view you as an asshole and don't have stalkerish tendencies. Such girls will weaponize their disgust in a flash.