I worried a lot about my ex when her and I broke up a few months back, but there is no magic breakup formula. I broke up with her probably four or five months ago, and I know for a fact she is fucking dudes in Colorado and Spain now. I felt bad breaking off my engagement and she sure seemed sad at the time, but I shit you not five weeks later she was with a new asshole and probably eight months after we broke off the engagement she was married to that same asshole. You do not owe this woman anything more than "I don't think this is working out", and from there, as noted in the sidebar article getting over a breakup, blocking her and going no contact is your best decision. She doesn't own you, you aren't her slave, you don't owe her anything, she didn't save your puppy from a housefire.

I understand that incredible sex with an insanely hot girl is more addictive than heroin and it will be hard to just walk away, but your best bet is to do just that. Trust me, my ex-fiancé was insanely stunningly hot and we had incredible sex. I understand completely. And remember, there is always someone younger and tighter out there IF you are willing to put in the work. You know what to do.

DO NOT try to become boring or beta. This is terrible advice! All you're going to do is develop be ad habits and anger the psychopath! She will blame you for acting weird and inconsistent and find ways to make your life hell. Trust me. I have years of experience with crazy women.

It's not your job to fix her, it's not your job to keep her happy and it's not your job to take abuse or her shitfits. Your job is to protect your own wellbeing.

JFC.... the guys on here really think you can rationalize with a highly unstable and emotional woman?

When a woman's hypergamy kicks in, it's stronger than any other rational thought. The only way she will "let" you walk away is if you're completely destroyed.

It's really up to you. You can try to become boring Billy beta. You can play the white night card of "that's not who I am". You can light yourself on fire to keep others warm. It's a path to misery and self destruction.

Relationships end. That's normal. You're going to have to make peace with being the one to safely end it or stay weak and miserable.

My advice is to plan a stealthy exit. If you have any of your belongings at a place of hers get those back. If you own property or a car make sure you have insurance and preferably security cameras. One your stuff is secured. Either call or text her your done. Block her and don't ever answer again. It's done. No drawing this out. No giving her hope to reconcile. No weakness.

You'll thank me for saving you another half a year or more of pure hell.

I'm no fool and i know i cant do this without hurting her,

She'll be fine. She'll find another dick within 24 hours.

The mentally unstable breakdown is just a bluff to stop you dumping her.

Tell her straight..... "This isn't working, it's not you, it's me, I hope we can be friends".

That's it.

Whatever you do, don't be friends with her.

you could always fake your death or something lol

Become "boring." Make yourself uninteresting to her. Give her the ick, and she'll just go away on her own.

This is something quite a lot of us suffer from at some point. Men are a lot kinder than many women give them credit for and we do pity women when they struggle and we naturally don't want to make them feel abandoned, particularly when we have been gentle and intimate with them.

I have struggled with this with only limited success. The problem is that if you are going to be kind to her, you are not going to dump her, so somehow you have to be unkind. I wonder if simply telling her you are through is not the kindest way in the very long term but its not something I have carried through with women I care about and its not something you say you want to try. Women seem to induce too much pity.

In my case I have "succeeded" only where I have got her to think it was in some way her idea to start and lent into it with the truth, creating a feedback loop of agreement and amplification. So when she has gone off crazy, for no fair reason I have said "You know you are right to be angry/ upset, this is not working out, why else would you be like this?" In that moment of her being crazy already, she has agreed and amplified and I have further amplified. That's the easy bit. Next day when she wants to make up you have to say "You know you were right, you wouldn't say that/ do that if you were not unhappy. This isn't working with me being me and you being you. I am not the guy to please you/ fix you/ make you complete or this would not be happening. Just look at the evidence" If you don't want to go the whole way you can say "trial separation" as women love to do and hope she locks onto another guy in the time you have off or at least cools it enough to take your saying "I thought about it and I feel the same, we are not a good fit. We just wouldn't have those episodes if we were" but it is probably the weaker move.

Don't be tempted to be kind at the end just to show her you really cared. Kindness and goodbye together can really spin the hamster wheel past its limits-its the combination of what she really wants and what she really doesn't want that is red rag to a bull. I once did that and drove round her house when I knew she was out and left a gift and a nice letter. Even though the nice letter did include "I don't want to have any contact with you for at least a year" my phone never stopped ringing till eventually I went round her house and banged her without even getting up the stairs and the whole madness started again. Next time I ended it on a harsher note and it worked.

In the end its a bit like the hunter's paradox. Hunters like deer, we spend a lot of time watching them and understand them better than tree hugging liberals. We don't want them to suffer but we just sometimes want to make them dead. There are "nicer" ways to make things dead but none of them are actually that nice and usually some brief pain will be involved in making meat. There is no entirely nice way to kill an animal -because its never the way the animal wanted the day to go- and there is similarly no entirely nice way to kill a relationship.