I'm wondering if you guys ever met women who were of such quality and with whom you had such great compatibility that it was worth it to drop your other plates/become exclusive?
Personally I'd like a family at some point, and I can imagine that it's likely impractical/unwise to still fuck around having young kids and would probably be willing to let go of other women.
However, that's probably 5 years away, assuming I meet the right woman.
I'm just cynical towards myself that I'll even be able to let go of the thrill of chasing tail/optionality when I arrive at that point. Because it is super addictive. I already have achieved financial independence at a very young age and pretty much the only things that are of interest/stimulate me now is being with my family/couple close friends doing cool shit, some intellectual pursuits and a significant part of my days is managing multiple women.
Guessing that quite a few veterans here have given up monogamy altogether precisely because of this & the fact that they have become so picky most women no longer qualify as anything more than plates.
mattyanon Admin 22h ago
Nope.
Exclusive fucking SUCKS. Not straight away. It's great at first. But gradually, creepingly, over the years it SUCKS. She gradually starts to "be more tired", your sex life goes downhill, the demands go up, the obligations are always ratchetting up.
That illusion of security will fuck with your head. It will fuck with your heart. It will fuck up your life. The only thing not getting fucked is your dick.
Musicgoon78 3 19h ago
I've found that as soon as you get exclusive, the dread goes out the window and so does the respect and sex frequency.
So far, no woman has beat the competition and been worth complete exclusivity.
I think you're thinking idealistically instead of realistically.
I'm not saying don't try exclusivity. Give it a go, but be smart about it. Have an exit plan, don't get married and know your legal rights so you don't get wrecked.
These days, loyalty doesn't get you much except an acute case of dry-dick.
cundardunfinished 2d ago
I would frame it partly as just being sick of spinning plates, rather than just a woman pulling me away. End of the day all pussy is pink and sometimes I want to focus on other things. But yes the thrill of the chase is still there and especially when I was younger felt like a big sacrifice that I wasn't always happy I made.
It's rare though. Most women are terrible partners, especially now they listen to the same podcasts and see the same content creators and all think the same. I haven't read the sidebar for a long time but feel like this may be a new development in TRP, the homogenization of women seems stronger than it was 10 years ago. Yes we know AWALT but it's very specific now in terms of how they think and buzzwords and whatnot.
Also as I've gotten older I've accepted the temporary nature of LTRs so it's a little less scary to enter them
Hugo_The_Great 1d ago
Right I'm just 28 and the thrill/variety still has quite a firm grip on me but I was just wondering in regard to the future.
In regard to most women being terrible partners, I guess you have to find one who is intelligent and malleable enough to be transformed into a product that works well enough for you. The final product doesn't exist off the shelf.
Yea LTR have a temporary nature to them, although that obviously is not what I will be aiming for when creating a family and leaving a legacy. But sure it can happen, and I'll be ok walking at that point, having trust that I'll find something new/better. Still will be hard if you have kids etc though.
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 2d ago
I did just that with my wife. I was fucking other women when we met, and I dropped all the others over a few months. It wasn't deliberate or conscious, but just that I'd grown to prefer giving all my free time to just her.
I do not recommend getting married though. Too entangled.
Hugo_The_Great 1d ago
Thx for the reply, nope don't intend on ever getting married.
I was thinking the answer was probably along the lines of 'my other plates started to feel annoying/uninteresting and I just kept thinking about how it would be more fun if I was with her'. Cheers.
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First-light 2 2d ago
If you really fall for someone, you just get focused in on her, at least that is my experience. Once the infatuation fades though, you have to make a conscious decision to not see other women because everyone enjoys a new woman.
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Bozza 2 1d ago
It's happened to me twice. And I've alluded to this a bit on the main site plenty of times, particularly over the past few months.
Normally, plates are plates. You meet, you fuck. You can enjoy their company/spending time with them, maybe you might even grow fond of them. But you know that it's never going to be anything more than a plate. And then eventually it runs it's course, rinse and repeat.
These two women were entirely different. From the first time I met them it was apparent that they were different from the rest of the women I had met before.
We instantly "clicked". Our personalities meshed almost instantly. Conversation flowed effortlessly, neither of us ever ran out of things to say. Our humor was the same, music taste the same. And so on. Basically like meeting yourself in female form.
I ended up walking away from those first meets completely enamored with them.
Kept them as plates for a while, made them chase me and vetted them. They passed all vetting. And over the course of a few weeks it just naturally progressed to an LTR.
I naturally wanted to spend more time with them, talking to them etc. Other plates became boring in comparison and I naturally let them drop off. The idea of approaching and running new plates through the funnel just stopped being appealing. So ended up in LTRs with both of them.
But women like that are extremely rare. I've met 3 in my entire life.
throwaway415 1d ago
You’re only allowed three great women in your lifetime. They come along like the great fighters, every ten years. Rocky Marciano. Sugar Ray Robinson. Joe Louis. Sometimes you get ’em all at once.
Hugo_The_Great 1d ago
Was hoping for a reply along these lines.
I've only plated 6 girls for a longer (think 6mo+) time so far. Like you mention, I grew fond of them, but there was maybe 1 I had that connection with, despite all of them pushing for LTR from their side.
I guess my frame of reference is just too limited at this point to have a constructive view on this myself. Before I met said girl I thought I had a great connection with one of the other ones, but only after meeting her the previous one no longer seemed that special anymore.
Have work to be done.
Bozza 2 1d ago
This is why we say to spin plates. Once you've dated a decent amount of women, you know what you like and what you don't like, and you're less swayed by your emotions.