So went on a date with this girl who I thought was really attractive. Fit all the checkboxes and all that bs.
The date went really well I would say. I took her for a coffee ->then a walk -> then a bar. As the date progressed she was making hard eye contact and even asking me to make future plans. As we leave the bar she asks me to walk her home and we make out on the way there. We make out in front of her building and then i tell her good night.
After the date this was the text convo:
Me next morning: had a nice time last night, did you sleep alright? (we were both kind of passing out at the bar the night before)
Her: replies back at 5ish PM that day: had a nice time, slept well etc some bs about her day, asks me about my day and sleep
me: replies back at 12 am that night: some bs about my day, we should do it again sometime
her: replies back two days later: hearts my message, yeah definitely asks about my weekend
Me: replies the next day: just said some bs about my weekend and asked her about her weekend (i didn't really feel like asking her out after a two day response)
Her: radio silence...
Was this a fuck up in my text game after the date ? or something im missing during the date? Should i have went for the close that night?
I didn't even want to go on the date initially, she was the one that asked me out and I was surprised at how much I liked her at the end of the night.
dirtymikeandtheboyz 20h ago Stickied
update on this in case anyone is interested:
she actually just messaged me asking to go for a drink later next week..... blamed the 1 week radio silence on having allergies lol..... must be one of the most retarded excuses i have heard. I guess one of her prospects didn't pan out.
Il give an update if she flakes or not.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 19h ago
Stickied
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1d ago
You didn't fuck a woman trying to get fucked.
dirtymikeandtheboyz 1d ago
I thought this was it, but I don't get why the rush.. why does it matter if it's on the first date or second date.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 20h ago
Because that's her logic. She clearly wanted to fuck, that's why she asked you out and went overt.
Two things women do when you don't fuck them when they want to fuck you:
Stop viewing women as Disney princesses. They want to fuck, and it will always be your fault it in their mind that you didn't fuck them
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 8h ago
You mean "your fault", right?
Vermillion-Rx Admin 8h ago
That was purely a mistake, yes
AbusiveFather1 1d ago
Why didn’t you ask her if you could come inside? No pun intended
dirtymikeandtheboyz 1d ago
I wanted too but I was so frigging hungry (hadn't eaten since lunch that day and It was already like 1 am) that sex was the last thing I wanted. Usually when I'm that hungry I can't perform very well either.
mattyanon Admin 1d ago
Next time ask if she has any food ;)
Vermillion-Rx Admin 20h ago
It was the first thing she wanted. You gotta choose man. It's not like her fridge is empty
AbusiveFather1 1d ago
I don’t think you should be prioritising having dinner over getting laid, no matter how you perform. Unless you’re drowning in pussy as it is, in which case you wouldn’t be making this post
dirtymikeandtheboyz 1d ago
lol you're not wrong, but if I am in starvation mode I usually have trouble maintaining an erection so I dont think that would've went very well. To top it of it was like 1 or 1:30 am and i had work the next day and was un showered after a full day of work. This was bad logistics on my part.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 20h ago
Then just ask make an excuse to come inside and after a bit of escalation tell her you have work but want to pick up where you left off soon
mattyanon Admin 1d ago
sounds good, although this is a terrible point in the night to make out. better sooner.
Generally best not to fuck on a first date if you plan to see her again.
Don't be naive about women.... if she's lost interest, she's found someone else.
Look.
After every date you've got a 50% chance of there being another, until you've fucked her 2-3 times.
Meet and get phone number? 50% chance she'll show........ second date..... 50% there's be another........ third date...... 50%.......
It's just how it goes.
After 2-3 meetings with sex, then the odds get a bit better, but before that she's always a maybe
dirtymikeandtheboyz 1d ago
just to clarify we made out after the bar and on the way to her place a few times. In front of the door was just the end of the date.
mattyanon Admin 2h ago
ah, ok
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 1d ago
I have to disagree with that one. Most of my lays were in the first date, and most of the time they wanted to keep seeing each other.
It still seemed 50/50 odds until we had fucked at least 3-5 times.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 20h ago
My experience is likewise more than 80% repeated fucking if on the first time and they weren't from an app where they have a massive pre-arranged dick buffet
Your pre-and post sex rapport (including rapport during sex if it arises) in my personal experience matters a lot.
I've had personally worse results not fucking them. Maybe our areas are just a lot different for some reason @MattyAnon
These USA girls want the cock
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 8h ago
I had forgotten that he isn't American
mattyanon Admin 2h ago
Dating is weird for me :)
Vermillion-Rx Admin 19h ago
@mattyanon edited my post so it probably untagged you
ObliviousDuck 21h ago
No. We have this tendency to blame the very last thing we did before being rejected. In reality, they check out one or two steps before.
That said, you do need to work on your text game, even though it was already too late here.
If you go for anything more than the first kiss, you must close or she'll most probably flake the next day. If you as much as grab her ass, put your hands inside her shirt or go for a second make out session, you have to close that night. This might seem counter intuitive but her ASD will be more triggered if you go too far without closing than if you do fuck her.
However, in that particular case, it sounds like she was DTF, did all the work and you didn't close. She probably sent you signals she wanted to fuck throughout the night you didn't pick up on. Her hamster is now telling her you are either not interesting, gay or a pussy.
dirtymikeandtheboyz 19h ago
todd v has a video just on this topic. Very interesting phenomena.
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 8h ago
More men need to realize this.
boateng57 18h ago
It's weird that she asked you out yet is indicating pretty low interest with the delayed response times.
She's probably into/fucking some guy who doesn't wanna commit to her, so she's trying to distract herself by going on dates despite her heart not fully being in it.
How did you meet this girl? And out of curiosity what makes you say she checks all the boxes so soon?
dirtymikeandtheboyz 16h ago
for context, before the first date, I texted her very sporadically... like every two days type of thing.
Yes she is actively dating as am I, this was a first date so it would be ridiculous to assume she is ready to marry me lol. We did share that we were seeing other people before this date but both of us want to keep our options open (this was kind of a stupid convo but I got a bit too drunk at the bar).
Met her on OLD, from a materialistic standpoint she checks the boxes: tall, attractive, has a good job with a stem degree, comes from a wealthy family so she wont be a financial burden on me. Personality remains to be seen.