I will try to keep it short.
Met this cute girl at a group trip we took. All of us started as strangers who met on day 1 and by end of a week we were all friends and just good vibes overall. This girl became too close with me. But she had said she had a boyfriend back home. I thought to myself okay I have no chance here and didnt pay much attention too her at all for last two days of the trip.
Lo & behold. It had the opposite effect on her. I think she also saw other women respond to me positively and were taking interest. Last day she held my hands, hugged me for a minute in front of everyone and didnt let go for a while before I left to catch my flight back home.
At one point she even grabbed my feet to massage them when I just casually said my feet hurt and if someone could help me stretch my legs. She just grabbed and started massaging. At one point I did catch her crying outside the hotel lobby where we were staying and I think she was on the phone with her boyfriend because I saw her phone getting calls back to back from a dude.
Anyway I had just boarded my flight and she messaged saying how much she is going to miss me and yada yada about making trips in the future. Now its been a couple of days since this incident and I havent heard back from her. Did she just go cold because she is with her boyfriend now? I know I should have struck when the iron was hot.
We texted for two days back and forth. Nothing too exciting from her side and she hasnt replied to my last text since 4 days now. I know the protocol is to next her and move on. I will follow on that yes, but I am curious what I could have done better so that when some other such situation arises I can be ready.
mattyanon Admin 1mo ago
yes
might not have worked.
She's got a boyfriend, and she's let you know this so that all responsibility is on you.
You were the best situational option.
The situation changed.
ballubhai 4w ago
Bang on point there my friend. My lesson from this situation was a reminder of AWALT.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
She sounds like a disloyal hoe who pushed the bounds of Fidelity on a trip. This is why TRP tells men that traveling is a red flag and that your girl should never travel without you
She's not interested. Next. You're chasing another man's problem
ballubhai 1mo ago
I 100% agree with everything you just said. When I saw her instagram later on I could see she had taken a few solo international and domestic trips and her boyfriend was nowhere to be seen. Having traveled across SEA I have met countless such hoes who have no qualms about traveling without their partners. I guess in hindsight, I caught a sniff of oneitis with this one because she reminded me of my ex girlfriend.
If my girlfriend did something similar like hugging and holding hands and massaging the feet of a guy she met on a trip I would go berserk. Like you said, another man's problem.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
This is why you made the post. You already sound like you have the other answers from experience
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1mo ago
If your goal is to fuck her, then isolate and escalate. The foot massage was a hell of an indicator that she was DTF.
If your goal is to keep needless complications out of your life, you avoid women like her.
ballubhai 1mo ago
Gonna go with the latter. I like my peaceful life.
Mofreer 1mo ago
A few years ago, I had a similar experience. Some women tend to live in the moment, and for her, you were likely just a temporary romantic fling until she returned to her boyfriend.
In my case, when she visited my city again, we hooked up even though she was still with the same guy. After that, I made it a rule to avoid getting involved with anyone in a committed relationship.
Interestingly, despite hooking up with me while in a relationship, she still claims she’s never cheated before. This is why I don't believe asking a chick a direct question reveals any the truth.
My advice? Move on from her. If you’re still interested, wait until you’re in close proximity again and make your move. You'll most likely bag her if you don't over indulge her for now.
financehardo420 Should i (x1) 1mo ago
Dude unless if I’m understanding wrong this was some kind of vacation situation where you are 99.99% likely never to see each other again. So like how are you even remotely surprised she’s not responding? She’s gone back to her mans now.
To answer your question for what you did wrong:
Respecting her bf’s territory. You don’t know mans; he’s not your bro you owe him nothing. buddy was not there; you easily could have smashed his girl.
Not isolating/escalating.
MrSupreme 1mo ago
She wanted some action, you hesitated for a bit and it may have been too long. She was on a trip and trying to let her wild side roam free, so it had to be a moment of sex right then and there, without thinking too much of the consequences. Your mind is better off without this "what if" stuff. Move on, have fun
First-light 1mo ago
She sounds like a slut who does not like to be without. While you were around you filled the man gap. Probably could have filled her up too but you never know. Some just like to play and tease. They like to know they could.