Since August, I’ve been experiencing head tension, heartache, lip biting or licking, racing thoughts, and overall decreased liveliness. Additionally, I feel disconnected from Christianity and religion, and I can’t even feel anything spiritually. I've also noticed that my mood has been less welcoming and positive at times. For example, while in a hotel rooftop hot tub, I was slightly rude or mean to others, which is completely out of the ordinary for me. Furthermore, from August to November, I was subconsciously and repeatedly asking myself, 'Am I dead or alive?'
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throwaway415 1 1y ago
I can relate to this, except it's been this way for me since about the age of 10 (I'm in my mid 30s).
I tried therapy in my teens, didn't work. I tried all kinds of things. Eventually I reached a point where I just accepted that this is who I am and that it isn't necessarily a bad thing.
We tend to pathologize normal human behavior. We treat depression like a mental illness when, IMO, it's often a normal and healthy human response to shitty circumstances.
If you're a rich kid who's always had an easy life, with a loving family, supportive friends, a hot girlfriend, a successful career, etc, I would agree that it's not healthy to feel this way, but if you grew up in poverty, watched all your friends and family members die or end up in prison, and worked hard your whole life just to lose everything you worked for, it's completely normal and healthy to feel this way.
My advice is simple. Just keep pursuing your goals. Be ambitious. This world hates men like us and wants to see us fail. Don't give them that satisfaction.
If nothing else motivates you, press on out of spite for your enemies. I take the negative feelings I have, the contempt and hatred I have for modern society and I use it as fuel to further my goals and improve myself. I don't work hard and make money to impress anyone. I don't go to the gym and get strong to be attractive to women. I do it to overpower my enemies. I do it to spite everyone who's ever doubted me. This actually works really well for me and maybe it'll work for you, too.
annieespinosa 1y ago
@slope game Talking to a mental health professional can provide you with tools to navigate these feelings.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
Okay. I hope you get help for this but what does it have to do with TRP? That's more or less a prerequisite for a question here
First-light 2 1y ago
Its a very hard question to address without context. Check your overall health and stress levels. If you do not have a history of mental issues, then the problem may well be solved by sorting out general health and stress levels.
A medical including detailed bloods might be a good start. This is assuming you already have a good diet, at least a sensible level of exercise and sleep plenty at regular times. If you don't have those basic building blocks, you could put them right first, then get a medical.
If all this checks out, look at work and life for problems and stressors.