I went on a date with this girl I met off a dating app. Date went well and we ended hooking up in a park but got caught by a security guard and kicked as we were looking for a place to fuck. Worst part was we were about to do it but I wanted to find a better spot to avoid people and get in trouble and thats when the security guard saw us.
Anyways the whole time she was telling me how much she liked me how she’was actually sad I was going home and going to miss me.
Texted her and now she’s saying she works really late that day and shes sorry blah blah blah. So thats a rejection.
This girl is a 6 or 7 with a nice body whole time she was talking about how her hobbies are sleeping and drinking and she spends all her money on clothes.
I have 4 other dates planned with way hotter girls t in the next two weeks Some of which I met irl. But im ngl im kinda pissed I wasted my time lol. Like unreasonably madder than I thought id be. I thought the abundance was supposed to help lol.
Also mad me realize how exhausting this all is talking to a bunch of girls.
I consistently fumble at the goal line, most of it in the early days was just nerves and lsck of experience, but I shit you not like the last couple girls I’ve nearly been inside for some dumbshit to happen and I rarely get second chances despite good dates where we usually end up hooking up… (Not always sex but usually head or kissing etc)
I imagine her issue was that I lived relatively far (am moving closer once I finish switching jobs.) which she seemed concerned about in the very beginning of the date. Its also very blantantly written on my profile, so its not my fault she can’t read. But regardless Im mad and hoping it won’t always be like this. Is this Ego? I rarely care if I get rejected irl. Of course the obvious action would be to forego dating apps, but I imagine this would not completely solve the problem and until I move this is my only source of meeting women, since I love in a small suburban town at the moment.
Edit : To clarify im mad cause in my head im better than this girl in every way. I only went on the date in the first place because she made it really really easy and was carrying the convo.
Also follow up questions what should I tell girls who have the same issue with me being “not close” Until I move.? I realistically don’t live thatt far to begin with.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
I was going to honor my not answering AskTRPs for a while thing but I'm just going to answer this one.
Look man, you gave a girl horrendous logistics when she was interested, gave her a very awkward experience getting caught (she probably hadn't ever been caught before) and now you're bitching and moaning about how you're better than her etc WHEN SHE LIVES FAR AWAY ANYWAY.
This is just a note to you and every other guy in the same boat as you:
You guys need to stop getting in emotional egotistical spirals about your worth on this planet to women when it is you guys shooting yourselves in the dicks to begin with.
When you give girls shit logistics, the girls you are picking are long distance, too far, etc., when it's online dating FFS (which nearly every experienced guy who fucks on here also says is mainly shit [unless you have a great profile and openers like TitusTorquatus]), saying awkward shit to women (not that you did) etc.
You guys are doing so many things to shoot yourself in the dick that has nothing to do with "being good enough" for women. It's your own damned decisions in a lot of cases and for some reason that is beyond me, not understanding basic shit about what women like and don't like such as sloppy, awkward places to fuck.
It's like basic as shit TRP concepts like plausible deniability and ASD go straight out the window for some of you guys the moment a girl makes your peepee get the slightest tingle. Why do some of you guys think we say "have you read the sidebar yet" when you've been here for over a year or two. It's because some of you guys seem to just completely skip over the utmost basic things in the sidebar and then puke your emotions and confusion about it on AskTRP
Maybe if some of you guys wouldn't stop forgetting basics you wouldn't continually find yourselves in this predicament.
Edit: you guys say you've read the sidebar, but you sure as shit haven't integrated the sidebar into your understanding of anything.
Red_dead 1w ago
Not really relevant now but we didn’t get caught doing anything we were in the process of moving somewhere and she had already buttoned up and thats were they saw us(the park was closed)
Also im not asking why it didnt work I know it why didnt work logically. Im well aware the logistics were shit. Im asking why I know all this and im still mad. I figure people have been through similar situations. It may have come off as an attempt to spill my feelings but im trying to figure out how to work through them. Because there might be a time where I do everything perfect and I still feel this way I want to be ready for that
But so I always try to use the search function on here and there was a post talking about how logistics shouldnt matter if you’re good enough and it was heavily upvoted and everything.
It was honestly what inspired me usually I don’t date that far away. I can link later but im on my phone.
Theres so much conflicting information on here that I don’t know how to sort through it all. Whos right and whos wrong .
Im just trying to understand how to get better is all. These are not constructive feelings and
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
Look, i don't think you'd be mad at all if you really understood it. you say you do but if you really understood it you would far more easily be able to say "that wasn't in my favor oh well"
The getting mad means you are taking it personally. And you said you keep not getting over the goal line. Which means you don't know how (i.e. don't understand)
This is horseshit. They matter. Too many of you guys read this TRP stuff so literally you think a virgin will suck your dick next to a dumpster with heroin needles on the ground 5 feet away if you're hot enough™. Some of you guys take this shit way too far in extrapolating, and or extrapolate this information to women that wouldn't do it. A virgin raised by good parents doing what's in my example? Unlikely. A ratchety woman piss drunk after clubbing or some trailer trash crack addict, probably. But you guys can't read the sidebar all literal like nothing matters or won't count against you
I mean it's basic common sense.
So?
Two posters can say the same thing and both can be right. Some advice applies more in some situations than others, even if the situations have overlap
You guys need to read this shit through the common sense filter. That should be step zero when you read anything ever. You guys are confused as you are because you apply zero common sense to what you read on TRP.
I've seen so many men on here just completely forget about common sense or basic social psychology trying to be a Chad or some shit.
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1w ago
Are you?
Then why do you care that it fizzled?
If I'm shopping at Walmart and one of the she-walruses riding in the fatty scooters that used to be for disabled people tells me "I wouldn't fuck you in a thousand years!" unsolicited and out of nowhere, my response is "good!" and maybe to look around for a hidden camera. The most thought I'd give it after-the-fact is having an amusing story to tell.
It sure as hell wouldn't be to get angry and write an emotional screed about it.
Your post reads like you were overly-attached, and depending heavily on a certain outcome for your happiness.
Red_dead 1w ago
I mean realistically yea I do think im better lol
But yea man thats what I was trying to figure out! I should not be mad.
Ok I actually just had an epiphany about it while I typed this. I think this helped a lot. Sometimes posting here helps me sort through my thoughts because I can get outside opinions .
First-light 1w ago
I think here the issue -aside from logistics- is that you are spinning girls as plates who are actually looking for more. Its hard to "keep up a relationship" with a girl when you are not able to on an availability level. If she wants more and you can't give it, then its an exhausting life for you, if there are several of her. One of her in this situation is bad enough but you can then at least feel "she's being unreasonable I am doing my best"
When you are spinning multiple plates, unless they are themselves playing the field or for some other reason not seeking a normal relationship it usually ends when you are exhausted and think the juice is not worth the squeeze..
Lone_Ranger 2 1w ago
it's really that simple.
mattyanon Admin 1w ago
Be patient you're doing great...... you now need to optimise for time and effort, but you'll get there with it.
It helps with a rotation of girls you're actually fucking.
You'll learn to reduce your expectations of new girls and to give them less while getting more.
This is your ego fucking with you.
You think you're better than her therefore she wants you.
This is not how dating works.
Musicgoon78 1 1w ago
Usually arrogance is fake self confidence. It's a position of weakness. Self confidence is sexy. Its ok to talk positively about yourself or to be proud of who you are. Arrogance shows insecurities. This is when you think you're better than someone. Truly confident people don't need to keep someone down to build themselves up. Your butthurt shows a lack of confidence.
We all get ghosted or ignored on occasion. That's the name of the game.