I was wondering if any of you have experienced first/third hand the situation of having been with so many women that whenever you meet a new one, she or someone in one of her social circles, will know another girl(s) you've already been with.
Personally, I haven't been with as many women, a few dozen tops. And from the first moment I've tried to avoid being with too many girls in 1 geographical area and to make sure there are as few overlapping social circles as possible. Also, I make sure to leave things as best as I can when a fling/relationship ends.
My friend in this case, didn't. He's in his late 20s, been with 250-300 girls of which 200 have been in the same 20 square miles. Keep in mind we live in a country where the largest city has 1 million inhabitants and most big cities are 100-500k range. In addition, he ghosted a lot of these girls, also had LTRs and meanwhile doing shitloads of cheating etc.
The problem for him is that, in a world as connected through social media as ours today, that it's fairly easy to figure out who has been with whom. It's gotten to the point where he can't date girls in his local area anymore and even in nearby cities he keeps running into the issue of bad rep.
Is this something that can be avoided by being a 'gentleman' player of sorts, or is it unavoidable that you're absolutely fucked when you get to this high a notch count?
newuseracccausewtf 1y ago
i got a friend who's easily fucked more than 200 woman... and there's absolutely nothing different. He just doesn't really care about it, in the same way you might be compelled to jerk off before going to sleep... he gets compelled to invite some girl over. As simple as that. He does not hate woman, he is not soulless, he believes in love. Sex is just sex, and yall nerds make a huge deal out of it for NOTHING.
edit: just to add as a note, he is not handsome in the traditional sense (as in a simmetrical face or whatever); matter of fact his face is weirdish and full of scars. But, he's been tall since school, his dad is a black belt martial artist and a local deputy, he has 2 older brothers (no sisters), his family is very traditional. Been training martial arts due to his dad since he was like 5 years old, etc. That's the secret to his success: he never had to try, he was always "that guy" (as in, "macho") since school and he does not think about it AT ALL.
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
Definitely can be improved by being more selective
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
Are you going to fuck 200 women? If not why are you overthinking this?
Assuming you're not going to ever fuck 200 women but still want an answer, I had a friend that fucked 300 women. He is soulless as hell.
While i would like to point out that sex with a lot of women doesn't equal misogyny, he actually just ended up hating women. Like actually hating them and treating them like shit. Not just an "I'm an asshole, let's fuck" way but like piece of shit assholery. He would fuck and then at the slightest inconvenience just tear at them over text etc, ghost repeatedly etc.
The second any woman gave him an ounce of emotional affection he got a deep oneitis. I couldn't help this guy with any chick. He was falling in love with a new girl every month, not surprisingly with women that all were terrible prospects.
On one occasion he told me no woman will ever love him or want to marry him with those bodies. and I couldn't disagree with him, there is an extreme degree of body counting where women don't see you as a viable long term mate.
He actually has a really solid profession, good looking guy, can partner dance pretty well, can just buy houses with cash, and most women would otherwise be pretty content with such a guy but he probably honestly completely destroyed any ability to pair bond or at least not fall in love with every chick that throws him an emotional bone.
I wouldn't wish this on any men, I don't believe this man will ever be happy and it's his own damn fault because he couldn't keep his dick inside his pants or think about what would happen if he went down that route
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
Second comment. This is just massive overthink
Even if you fucked 500 women you are not going to be constantly running into friends of lays unless it's a small town.
You shouldn't even be worried about this, and assuming you weren't horrible in bed or something another girl finding out you had sex with another woman isn't going to hurt you
This post is a massive overthink
Intrepid_Place53900 1 1y ago
So, your friend is a real asshole. He ghosts girls, he has LTR's and cheats on them all. He probably lies to them about what he's looking for. Oh, I want a LTR, knowing all along he just wants to F her and then will ghost her and move on.
Does this for years, being a total player in his area and wonders why the word seems to be getting out, especially with social media?
Don't shit where you eat, comes to mind.
Musicgoon78 3 1y ago
I call bullshit. Preselection works. I've banged other women in front of my girlfriends. They still fucked me. It's all about dread.
Either this is a made up story or your friend is great at burning bridges.
Hugo_The_Great 1y ago
Yeah he pretty much did scorched earth and that's probably what burned his rep.
Amount of lying/gaslighting he did was off the charts
EurasianChad 1 1y ago
Lmao I've got a reputation in my city as well. Still doesn't stop girls from getting with me because I've always been honest about my intentions and never promised commitment.
Solution: Work on your fitness, finances, and freedom. Work on yourself and be the absolute best version of you. Then you won't have to lie to girls to smash. They'll willingly spread their legs.
Lone_Ranger 3 1y ago
this is all silly hamstering. You are assuming equivalence between men and women... having a reputation as a slut is only an issue for women. For men, its serves as a strong recommendation.
As soon as man hears that a woman is the town bike, they lose interest. As soon as a women hears that a guy is 'a bit of player' she is very keenly interested. Think about it. The biggest insult a man can level at a woman is 'slut'. The biggest insult women throw at men is 'incel'.
An incel is a man that can't smash. This gives them the major ick.
I figured it out very early on at uni. The single best thing you can do as a young man is develop the reputation as a man-slut. That is what seals the deal. Then when you go to parties, the chicks to all the work for you - they approach and say things like 'I'm so angry at you for the way you treated Jenny" Then they go on to explain that you know that you fucked Jenny, then ghosted her and fucker her best friend the next day. Then this same chick, which is apparently angry at you, will go home with you, and when you peel of her panties, you will notice that there are already wet.
Women LOVE man sluts. There is no such thing as too high a notch count for a man.
You are making the age old mistake of listening to their mouth noises and not observing their behaviour. They say that they hate players, but watch what they do - they drop their panties for players and make beta guys 'date' them (pay for dinner / drinks / gifts / trips).
This is Dual Mating Strategy 101. You should know this.
Hugo_The_Great 1y ago
I understand all this. Men place a lot more importance on promiscuity.
All I'm saying is that I have the suspicion that you can get to a point where even as a man, women will be repulsed by the amount, especially if that includes multiple girls with whom they share social circles (in)directly.
But I agree that you need crazy numbers for that to occur and even then much of it can be offset by having sky high SMV (which you'll need to get to 100s in the first place).
Lone_Ranger 3 1y ago
wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong.
Women are never repulsed by men that have high body count. Russel Brand is good example. His body count is roughly 1,500. He is not very good looking, isnt' tall, apparently has bad breath, skinny, weak, looks gay, and has stinky hair and a small cock. Woman cannot get enough of him. He cannot go to an event without women demanding that they fuck him.
there is a great story about Babe Ruth, the baseball player. One of the greatest shaggers of all time (also fat, ugly and smelly). He would always rent the penthouse when they were on tour, because he needed space for after game parties, where he would basically only invite some of his buddies and as many hot chicks as he could (they were all keen). In the book "One summer: 1927" Bryson recounts an eye witness account of one of his hotel room parties - as it got late, Babe stood on a chair in the middle of the suite, cupped his hands and yelled as loud as he could "will any women that DON'T want to fuck me please leave the party now". None of the chicks left.
There is no such thing as female disgust re. high body count in men. You need to get that idea out of your head. This is nature. In a monkey society, only the alpha male is allowed to fuck the female monkeys. Just one, just the alpha. And he fucks them right in front of everyone else. the other females watch him fucking the females and then they know, they don't think, that he is the alpha. Female monkeys ONLY want to fuck the alpha.
This is how female humans are. They ONLY want to fuck the alpha. All the things like fast cars and watches, they are only make up. The thing that really makes the KNOW that a man is the alpha is if the man has fucked every woman in the village.
That is the man they wan to marry. Not the incel.
You have to stop assuming that men and women are the same. they are polar opposite in most respects.
You still have not understood how women think.
No-Stress-Cat 1y ago
Sucks to be him. Learn from his example.
JamesSkepp Moderator 1y ago
Are you a journalist by any chance? The headline says:
But the body of the article explains:
To answer your question:
Not a "gentleman" (stay away from trying to be that, unless you know how to mix it with "this guy fucks" aura), just a cool guy who girls want to be around. You do that by being a cool guy who girls want to be around, not by being mean to girls you date. I suspect the core of the issue is not that he's know for sleeping with lots of women, but by how he acted afterwards, perhaps he was too open, explicit or obvious about it ("Everyone knows he sleeps with a lot of girls, by sleeping with him I'm going to get an opinion of an easy girl"). Perhaps the issue is that he was good at getting the girls but wasn't "cool" enough for them to not to have some regrets ("Yuck, I fucked this THIS guy, I hope nobody finds out"). I get that small city plus high burn through ratio can leave a trail, but from how you're describing it your friend left scorched earth.
Hugo_The_Great 1y ago
It's kind of clickbaity, but not entirely.
Obviously treating some of these women so badly has been detrimental for him, but I have the suspicion (from my own experience also) that even treating them well, having been with so many women, you get the 'player' rep and it putts a large amount of women off or makes things difficult because of jealousy/other conflict.
I've been with popular girls and as a result I couldn't sleep/date a lot of girls from their vast social circle because these girls were afraid of conflict with popular girl.
On the other hand, I've been with girls who forwarded/recommended me to their other girls so not sure what to think.
Lone_Ranger 3 1y ago
What age are you Hugo?
It does sound like the penny hasn't dropped for you.
Women are never put off by high body count in men. They actively crave high body count men that they know are going to treat them with disdain and contempt.
What they fear is men that are virgins and are going to fall in love with them (eewwwwwwwww!! ick!)
Women want men that hate them as much as they hate themselves.
They are repulsed by romantic incel virgins.