What’s up TRP!
I’ve been in an LTR, I’m open she’s closed. Sort of the black dragon set up with OLTR. I only occasionally have sex with other women. No dating them.
My LTR is great. She’s not into 3sums but says she would do them occasionally for me. Would this eventually backfire on me? She claims she has no interest to do them but would just to make me happy. Is this part of TRP in the sense she’s doing things to please me? i don’t want to force her to do anything she doesn’t want to do.
Lone_Ranger 3 1y ago
Why do you want to pull your LTR into a 3 some? Why do you have to keep pushing it?
Why are you trying to turn her into a degenerate? Is normal sex not enough for you? Got to turn her into a slut? Why not get her to shoot up some drugs as well? wtf.
Nich2022 1y ago
Shut up. Clearly I said I’m not forcing anything on her.
Lone_Ranger 3 1y ago
good luck with that attitude bro.
Nich2022 1y ago
Thanks for the best wishes. And providing no value.
entgame 1y ago
If you'd Eve4 want to try it you got to have extra rules.
Listen to gut.
eliminate all women that would be a threat to LTR. Not low threat, but BPD, narcissistic women, super damaged, bitches you cant influence due to internals being titakky fucked.
be super casual and dismissive about other women but not super disrespectful, no discussions that would fall into gossip category. Tease your LTR about experience, pick on her behaviour during encounters negative/positive, push & pull on it.
Dont rub it in the face. Rather avoid people you can run into.
I was in LT open marriage thAT ended due to other stuff.
Play it safe, initially.you will need to calibrate to help LTR with changes, to new situation, but don't get defensive because your LTR can loose confidence in doing it, ifyou are not confident about it yourself.
Saying that, first time you can try to do it by surprise. So she doesn't overthink.
ObliviousDuck 1y ago
Do you live together? How old are both of you? How much sexual experience does she have?
Nich2022 1y ago
Don’t live together but spend about 5 days together per week. She’s 28 I’m 32. I have lots of experience. She has some but not much with other women and only doing it for me.
Kloi 1y ago
In a similar situation. One sided, OLTR in my favor. Thankfully my girl likes girls too.
Understand a woman will only put up with this for so long before she starts to try and close up your side of the relationship unless you're a true powerhouse. My girls benefit is either one of us could still bring a woman home to play around with the both of us.
Most the guys I know that have been doing this for years successfully can provide for the wives. Meaning she doesn't have to work, they can book them first class flights to the Bahamas but even then the women and feel more and more miserable as the relationship goes on.
Communication is key. Being open, honest and upfront is extremely important to make things work.
There's a gentleman by the name of MusicGoon who's got way more experience in this than me. If I can dig up his handle I'll tag him as he's more active on discord.
Nich2022 1y ago
Yeah you’re winning as your girl is actually bi. Mine doesn’t classify as bi but is only doing it to please me. I’m a powerhouse but don’t provide for her now but that’s the expectation once engaged and married with kids. She has her own 6fig job (I still make more than her).
She’s not completely Icked out by women but says she’d never be with one if it wasn’t for me.
Whatsnext 1y ago
Do you have friends that are in marriages (closed both sides) where the women doesn't get more and more miserable as the relationship goes on?
Kloi 1y ago
Yes. Multiple and I'd wager the common denominator is the man leads the relationship with a mindset of constant growth.
The point you're getting at still holds true a majority of marriages around me are loveless on the soft end and toxic and vindictive on the hard end.
Whatsnext 1y ago
I am honestly wondering because I find its super rare and its something I want
Whatsnext 1y ago
What kind of growth? Fitness, Financials, Mental?
Kloi 1y ago
Every aspect of life. Stagnation kills relationships. Financial may be excluded as I don't really discuss this with most people.
The happy, old relationships I see the man and woman have their own separate lives, they live within their set roles and routines but they're always expanding/trying new things together or by themselves.
Obviously this slows with age.
I think another big aspect of this is they have their own semi separate lives. They're not always together. For example one group of men in particular that I believe still have happy wives in their 60s-80s.
These men get together a few times a week for bible study, talk politics or just shoot the shit over coffee. Occasionally or for special occasions the wives show up too.
The women have their own book clubs, knitting groups or w.e it is that they do together.
Idk if it's just a plaque on the younger generations (myself included) where couples move in together way to quickly (my current relationship is like that) and they feel they constantly need to be together. They're constantly in contact.
That's unhealthy in my opinion. We're not two souls coming together as one. We're two separate individuals constantly choosing to stay together.
whytehorse2021 1y ago
I wouldn't do it but I would appreciate the fact that she offered to do it to please you. Just do a 3-way with other women.
Nich2022 1y ago
I think you’re right. A bummer I can’t do it with my main girlfriend but she has many other amazing qualities and it would be dumb to ditch her just for that. She’s ok with me having sex only with other women as well. Why wouldn’t you do it?
whytehorse2021 1y ago
I wouldn't do it because I accept people the way they are. She's straight. It's bizarre to try to make a straight person bi/gay.
Nich2022 1y ago
Yeah I agree, that’s why I told her she doesn’t have to. But she insist to to make me happy. Idk weird situation.
MrSupreme 1y ago
It's kind of a shit test,kind of.She says she'll be open to sex with other women just for you,that sounds like she's giving you a chance to convince her further,just don't act too cocky about it. she wants you to lead.Search for xKill your inner loser", the guy there has a lot of guides for threesomes,he's been doing it for 5 years with his girlfriend and other women.
Nich2022 1y ago
I feel that man. Be she is stressing that she has no interest in women at all and that it’s purely to see me happy. But I agree, if you didn’t have any interest, why even do it at all? I’ve met women who were actually only interested in men and wouldn’t think twice about being with a woman.
There’s no way in hell if a women said “can you be with other men just for me becuase you love Me” I’d say hell no and fuck off. Idc how much I love you.
MrSupreme 1y ago
I know right, women are a bit more homoerotic than men,but first she is willing to share the dick with another woman,and second, she is willing to kiss,touch and lick some other woman's pussy. Report back to tell what you did with it mate, looking forward to it
Nich2022 1y ago
Right! For sure will do. Her only thing is she isn’t ever giving another woman head. But will take it. I’ll report back
No-Stress-Cat 1y ago
Don't be surprised when she shows up some day with a jacked Chad, smiling and happy, and saying, "You're right, honey, this was a great idea!"
It's never a good idea to bring other people into your relationship. Keep you and her as you and her. What you do outside of you and her, keep it outside of you and her.
Nich2022 1y ago
I see what you’re saying but i am the jacked Chad hence why she’s even doing it in the first place. She doesn’t want other guys nor will I accept it tbh
Typo-MAGAshiv Endorsed Contributor 1y ago
If she's not into chicks, I'd advise just appreciating the fact that she offered and not try to do that. The experience would likely sour things for both of you.