This is a classic "mid contract price change" You might even consider it a bit of Anti Slut Defence (ASD)

She fucked on first date, so you know she's a slut. And she knows that you know. So all of her mouth noises are an attempt to change the deal after the event.

The golden rule is that you can never go backwards - she started as an easy lay, she now wants to become a difficult lay. If you let her, she'll pivot your into a FWNB.

got myself a perfect regular plate right?

Well no...... a one night stand does not a plate make.

She then says she's making changes following what happened because it freaked her out (fucking a married man who lied) and will only have sex with guys who are her boyfriend hahaha.

Oh fucking great........ so she fucks you, fucks someone else, then won't fuck you because now they....... look, this is standard epiphany phase shit.

Is this a shit test?

it's a shit test for you and all other men she meets

we met yesterday went for drinks kissed and I didn't wanna seem desperate so dropped her off and left. Is this plate broken and not worth the effort?

Definitely worth zero effort after shit like that.

she text me saying she had a great time and wants to go to a sauna next week (does she want to turn me into a beta provider? without giving up the pussy).

Be careful of being the security blanket / orbiter / emotional tampon. Not paying is easy, but women have sneaky ways of getting support from men without men quite realising it's happening...... hanging around, hoping for pussy, while she keeps getting what SHE wants..... (attention / protection / someone who wants to fuck her / listen to her / orbiter etc)

ATM my plan is to soft next and not message for 3 days and message her trying to initiate a late night chill session.

Fundamentally: FIND MORE OPTIONS.

Other than that...... you either have sex or you keep dates SHORT. Leave early, be vague, be distant, be non-committal, DO NOT BE HER FRIEND, make sure you do nothing for her, don't keep in touch properly, ignore most texts, don't reply for days, be random, etc.

Make sure you provied zero security, emotional support, etc...... and don't sub communicate that you willl be there for her in future, etc. etc.

Keep doing that for a while till it sinks in with her, then bang.

Overinvestment on your side. Go talk to 5 other women.

The word Plate is just a mental model to help guys understand that women are fickle, plentiful, and not worth investment (until they earn it with nonsexual actions)

What this means for you is either you're having sex with her or, if you aren't having sex with her, you go talk to other women("plates") to have sex with.

I don't hang out with plates if sex isn't involved.

A soft next is when you stop talking to a girl until she initiates contact.

What is happening to you is the girl is congruence testing you by asking "will you give me your attention if we don't have sex? what is the price of your attention?" and you're responding "yes we can hang out if we don't have sex as long as you kiss me and make me think we might have sex again eventually". In a way it is a shit test but think about it as a frame test. I will bet that you wouldn't hang out with this girl if she said that to you directly, so act accordingly.

Talk to more girls,don't feel like she has to be a plate because you fucked once. That's what casual hooking up culture gets you. Talk to more women,enjoy seducing them and fuck a few more. Don't write the blonde off just yet, only stop texting for a while until she makes contact. She could be trying to friend zone you,but I don't think that's the case if you already fucked.Give it some time,don't get lazy because it was an easy lay

1. Her telling you she got banged by another dude is a major sign of disrespect. Subsequently demanding LTR status is crazy and extreme low value behavior. She got pumped and dumped and wants you to pick up the pieces of her ego.

2. It’s not a plate until you’ve successfully railed multiple times.

3. I would personally drop her just for telling me ab getting fucked by another dude.

Bonus: you kinda went a bit overkill with the “I’m not your bf I don’t care as long as you’re clean etc etc” which is how this behavior has resulted. More alpha response would have been something like checking her on the disrespect of telling u ab other dudes. “I fucked 4 other girls last week you don’t see me telling you about them”

Extra bonus: you need more girls brah bitches ain’t shit but hoes n tricks

This girls is very immature and slutty. She has gone and got banged by a guy she really liked -probably a quality Chad- then when she is feeling really into him and full of the glory of her attractiveness, she has found out he is unavailable. She was not the powerful glorious one in the situation, she was the "used" one in her mind.

Her sluttiness combined with her failure to get what she wanted has freaked her out. She wants to clean up her act a bit and not be a plaything.

What are the odds of this lasting? How many 19 year old sluts reform before they are 39? 99% chance she will lick her wounds and then go and look for a bigger Chad, accepting lesser ones along the way to make her feel good.

What do you need to do? Nothing much just don't be dumb. Sluts like to slut. She will go slutty again, so long as you have not made yourself either too critical or too much of a beta to take advantage.

You know she is in no way going to be LTR material, so you just spin the plate when you want. You don't have to go and break the plate. If she pushes for girlfriend status you can honestly say "look we can call it that but it wasn't that a couple of weeks ago when you were quivering on some other guy's dick. I am OK with that but I would need a time of you acting like a girlfriend for me to think of you like one. Call it that if you like and I will say I am your boyfriend. You know its safe and fun being with me, lets have good times and see what grows." Chances are after a few weeks or months you will be bored. She is not LTR stuff by the sound of it but you could have some fun meantime if you don't smash the plate.