Matched with a girl online, we're both on vacation, invited her for a drink at 9, she agreed, told her where we will meet said she doesn't like the place (place is fine a bit boring maybe), told her to suggest another place she went silent.
Called her when it was time to meet, said she has a stupid water problem needs 1 hour to be ready, told her it's fine let me know when ready. Almost 1 and a half hour later called her she doesn't pick up she then texts me she's at another place and asked me to meet her, I agreed she then tells me she's with 2 of her girlfriends told her no I prefer only us she then sends me her location.
I was thinking about going in saying hi maybe trying to pull her alone or just enjoy my time with her group (if i could) but i noped out never replied to her and went back home.
Obviously I wasted my time without getting anything not sure i did the right thing
EurasianChad 1 2y ago
-Deleting answer as I jumped the gun on replying before reading the thread at all--
EurasianChad 1 2y ago
This is also why I call girls so they don't pull shit like this randomly. A lot of the time, she's nervous to meet a stranger so if you can demonstrate you're a chill dude over call, easy pickings.
AbundanceKid 2y ago
We're both on vacation, inviting her to a mall is out of the question, even i don't want to hang out in a mall. Obviously the place she suggested was more lively and i had no problem to 'comply' if she was alone
EurasianChad 1 2y ago
I missed the part where you said you were on vacation/barely read the thread, which is my mistake. But the same principles apply.
You seem to have your head screwed on straight so you did well. I'd only go if I truly wanted to check the spot out, and not just for a girl. If you got your social skills down pat you could befriend people in the bar/area then have her table as a home base so to speak if the friends are chill.
Easy social proof, easy situation to have fun in.
If your goal is purely just to smash, being rigid with principles will filter out any BS. If youre a very social guy/life of the party type, you can literally make fun out of almost any bar situation.
Redpillpusher 2y ago
That was a silly decision, you should have met up. She, just like you, was on vacation. Because she was on vacation with friends, it's not difficult to understand that they were probably going to be together for the majority of the trip; that meeting should've been the time you use to show her you're cool enough for her to entertain the notion of leaving her friends later for you. She realized that since you're also on vacation, the probability of you having a guaranteed roster of other options ready are slim so you would not have looked desperate just showing up and hollering at her, as long as you didn't do anything stupid like buy them drinks. And if it was wack, you could've walked off and did your thing. Stop over thinking things
AbundanceKid 2y ago
Thank you, yes that's what i was thinking i may have missed, even though she was disrespectful i could've just went in and tried to have fun.
Her friends are not on vacation though, they live here, this is our home country we're both working abroad and currently having vacation here.
Redpillpusher 2y ago
Oh, sorry, I had to re read. I retract my statement, I see she replied after over an hour. Yea, it's good you didn't go, if you did the power dynamic would've been in her favor and for you to correct that would require more time and effort you had or would want to put in
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
Still she's staying with her friends. Girls who are even just having a night out at a local dive bar will still close their friends back if they lose too much of their friend's attention to some guy.
The fact she was on vacation and they don't see her often made their incentive to claw her in even harder. Probably the friend's fault for most of this, Should have just met at that lively place and bounced it gamed other chicks if it was a no go.
You can be picky on vacation but it will lead to a lower conversation rate
Given that she was taking an hour to respond i would have just gone somewhere without her and ran night game instead
AbundanceKid 2y ago
Yeah her friends clawing her in makes sense, she could've been more responsive through text and mentioned her friends beforehand. The way it happened made me look like chasing her while she's making up excuses about a water problem in an attempt to throw me off and hang out with her friends at that fun bar.
EurasianChad 1 2y ago
Exactly. The best move on the chess board from a strategic perspective would be to meet up with her and her friends, but to befriend others in the vicinity and bring together everyone that's chill.
So many leads could've come from this. Literally anything could've happened. The girl/girl group could also see him work a crowd and get even more attracted. Or he could've met some chill people to befriend for the time being/met other girls.
But from a "either I get laid or nothing" perspective, him not going is what would've saved time. This is the case with rigid principles.
Given he was on vacation in I'm guessing a beach scenario, going to a beach club/party and then gaming the whole venue would've been a sick idea, if youre higher energy/extroverted.
AbundanceKid 2y ago
Thanks bro, i agree. Though I'm not confident i have the right social skills for the have fun don't care situation.
EurasianChad 1 2y ago
No worries. I'm naturally extroverted so this is always an option, however I agree it is difficult especially if you're more on the introverted side. High energy is needed for this type of shit.
Always be working on the self & conquering your demons / fear. That's self development to me. Good luck
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
Basically. Being on vacation will inherently generate fewer leads on old unless the girls are down for a vacation fuck up front. Loses a lot of plausible deniability.
So gaming at a venue and letting girls know you're visiting would have helped him screen. When I got venues in a different city girls often try to pull me same night because they know I'm not up there. Had two girls try to pull me 10 mins apart once just because they "didn't want me to drive home so late" lol
[deleted] 2y ago
[--removed--]
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
1) possible she was anxious to meet a stranger and fuck on vacation fast escalation 2) friend thing possibly makes sense in this context, otherwise that'd be a hard no for me
Given the context and that going with her on a date on vacation basically implies ONS or several sex romps it makes sense if she was anxious. However, if she was sufficiently attracted to you she wouldn't have put up those hurdles and would have come over even in her sweatpants.
That being said, if she was not sufficiently attracted to you, and you were determined to not lose that potential vacation lay or meet other matches instead (could be hard as well you are on vacation) then going to meet her friends is contextually reasonable.
Keep in mind too, it could have also been her friends making it hard and shouting in her ear that they want to meet you first. They were probably all sharing a room and overly involved in her vacation dating. Likely it was probably the friends creating background drama and helping her invent those hurdles.
In the future if a date on vacation is being flakey just look for some other ONS at a good resort club etc, you're on vacation so if you're looking to get laid on vacation then at least go enjoy the hunt somewhere else while she flakes around
No-Stress-Cat 2 2y ago
Sure, girlfriend, let's meet up at that place you like. I'll be going home with your two friends though.